Hey everyone, time for a new chapter, kind of sort of on time. Okay, kind of late. Anyway, I guess we're starting to get into the final stretch of this story, maybe. I have the ending planned, I just need to um, get there. I had said somewhere between 35 and 40 chapters, it will definitely be closer to forty, or possibly more. I'm not too sure yet… Anyway, enough of my rambling, here's the next chapter.
Chapter 32
Selim kept on walking for the rest of the day, not knowing or caring anymore where he was going, just making sure that he put as much distance between himself and Envy as he possibly could. Pride was nearly silent, but Selim wasn't really trying to get any sort of conversation out of him anyway, too focused on trying to think of how he could even attempt to survive now.
The Elric brothers were out of the question, as much as he wished they weren't. They were the only people he could even think of that might have been able to get him home and not just bring him back to Pride's house. Every time he went near them though, the homunculus found him, and he'd have to go running again.
As strange as it was, it had crossed the black haired boy's mind a few times to just go to the homunculus. It wasn't that he was thinking about giving up, but maybe they could know some way to get him back, it probably wasn't too big of a stretch to think that they did. No matter what though, he just couldn't bring himself to trusting them to not just simply kill him and be done with it the easy way. After all, if the only thing they wanted was Pride back, then why would they go through the extra trouble of sending him home?
No, he couldn't turn to the homunculus for help, so all that left was himself. What could he do though? He wasn't an alchemist or anything. He didn't even know if alchemy could fix him, the whole problem was because he'd died. There didn't seem to be many cures for that.
The rest of the day passed with little to no interruptions. He made sure to stay on the outskirts of Central, and no one seemed to look twice at a filth covered homeless boy sneaking around the edges of the slums. Once night took hold again, he hid himself in the crevice of some large pile of junk, using the shadows as a protective force like he had almost every night since he'd learned how to.
The entire time his mind kept whirling with trying to find the answer, some way to save himself, but each attempt came up short. Why was it so hard to just go home? It was almost as if the place simply didn't exist anymore, but he knew that wasn't true. If it was, then that would mean that he didn't exist either.
"Pride?" he called out to the chilled night air. It still wasn't too cold yet, but he didn't want to stay long enough to find out what he'd do when it did get into the deep winter.
"Yes?" the sin answered, sounding as bored and uninterested as he usually did. Selim just ignored it and went on to what he wanted to ask. He was starting to get very good at ignoring things, actually.
"What do you know about those doors, and that figure? The Elrics knew about it, if your father is as smart as you say he is, then he must know something, right?" Selim asked, and Pride couldn't help but he a bit surprised that this was the same whimpering child that had first taken over his container. He didn't linger on the thought very long, quickly becoming annoyed with being ordered around by the human child.
"Of course Father knows, but what makes you think I would? Why don't you just go ask him for the answers yourself?" Pride said, but surprisingly, Selim already had a response ready for him.
"But I thought you were his favorite? Wouldn't he trust you with information like that? I mean, if it can let someone live after they've already been killed and end up affecting you so much, it has to be important," the black haired boy argued, and for a second Pride was silent on an answer. Not because he didn't know the answer to his question, because he certainly did, but because he hadn't expected the boy to actually be able to target him with the one thing that truly mattered to the sin.
"Father trusts me completely, and he has a reason to. You are the one who has no trust, of course I'm not going to tell you anything," the homunculus finally said, and Selim sighed as he stared ahead at the black wall of shadow that had engulfed him. He didn't doubt that Pride could keep his mouth shut, and he really wasn't sure how he was going to change that. It wasn't as simple as just become friends with the monster and he'd tell you whatever you wanted. He wasn't even sure if it was possible to become friends with him, if his father hadn't permitted it, at least.
"Pride, if you tell me what I need I might be able to find a way to get us both out of this mess," Selim tried again, but the sin was silent, and the boy sighed in resignation. He really couldn't get anything done if Pride wasn't willing to help him, and that certainly seemed to be the case. He couldn't just keep running until his luck ran out and he was caught though, but he wasn't able to think of anything else.
When the morning came Selim crawled out of his hiding place and started to wander aimlessly. What was he suppose to do? The lack of a direction was really starting to get to the boy.
"Why are you so determined?" Pride asked, surprising Selim slightly. He hadn't expected the sin to speak, and now that he had, he wasn't really sure how to answer his question. It was obvious, wasn't it? No one wanted to die, that's why he was being so persistent.
"We've been through this, I don't want to die," the child mumbled to the voice in his head, ignoring the slight stare he got from a few people who managed to overhear him. They didn't stop him or try anything, which he was thankful for. They probably thought he was insane and talking to himself or something, which he could deal with if it meant he was left alone and semi safe.
Sighing, Selim leaned against a wall, actual irritation starting to seep in at the confusion he had. There had to be some way out of it.
"That's it," he grumbled to himself, turning around and starting to try to figure out the way back to the old cabin. He hadn't exactly been paying attention as he walked, and it was yesterday when he left, but he knew a general direction at the very least. Pride watched on at his actions in confusion, although he wouldn't really admit that.
"What are you doing?" the sin asked, and Selim didn't hesitate at all as he began explaining. He really was loosing it now, wasn't he? He was either being extremely brave, or extremely idiotic right now. Pride would probably bet on idiotic, and sadly Selim wouldn't have really argued with him at that. He had no idea what he was doing, but he just had to do something.
"I'm going back," he said simply, although that didn't answer all of the homunculus' questions by a long shot.
"Why?" Pride asked, the annoyance he was feeling very clear. Selim tried not to let that single word question discourage him, although he did end up slowing his determined pace down just slightly. He still kept walking forward though, not letting himself stop to think about it too much, or else to might talk himself out of going. Chances were he wasn't going to find anything or anyone there, and it'd just be a big waste of time, but at least it was a start, sort of.
"I don't know," he mumbled, and the voice inside of his was silent after that, leaving the boy to his own thoughts as he struggled to find his way. By the time the sun was set, he'd been able to get a bit farther than where he was when he'd stopped to rest the night before. Managing to hide himself again, the child was only able to catch snippets of sleep during the night, his mind once again occupied. He didn't know why exactly, but even since the attack from that monster known as Envy, he just wanted to go home as fast as possible. He didn't like what he was becoming.
In the morning he was once again on the move, although it took him until very far into the day to finally find what he hoped as the same woods that the Elric brothers had taken him to. Bracing himself, the black haired boy started into the forest, looking around for any familiar landmarks or signs that would lead him back to that old barn.
After another two hours of wandering he had no idea where he was, and slumped against one of the many surrounding trees. Why couldn't he do anything right anymore? His mind was a swirl of emotions and he couldn't concentrate, and it was driving the child insane. He just wanted to go home, dang it.
Selim couldn't help but think that if he was in a story book or something like that, now, when all hope seems lost, would be the time when someone would stumble upon him and help guide him in the right direction or offer some helpful advice or give him some sort of epiphany that would set him on the rest of his journey right up until his happy ending. It wasn't though. There was no rustling of leaves, no mysterious stranger happening through the forest, no guidance from above. He was alone, and it stayed that way as he slowly slid down to the forest floor and fell asleep much earlier than he was used to now.
He ended up waking very early the next morning, the sun just barely starting to turn the eastern sky a light shade of grey. The grass around him was covered in cold dew, and everything seemed a bit wet. Had it rained? If it did, it couldn't have been any more than a drizzle, seeing as he hadn't even woken up.
Pushing himself from the ground, Selim stood up and ran a hand through his damp hair. He still wasn't able to answer that simple, two word question. Now what?
"Give up," Pride oh so helpfully suggested, and Selim just rolled his eyes at the comment. It was the first time the sin had spoken in quite a while though, and the child couldn't help but think those words over just a little bit.
"Fine," Selim said after what seemed like an eternity, actually managing to surprise the ancient sin just slightly. He knew the boy was at the end of his ropes, but he didn't expect him to actually listen, he never had before.
"Really, after all that, you're just going to hand yourself in?" Pride asked, and Selim nodded, starting to look around and try to figure out which way would take him back to Central.
"I don't have anything else I can do. Maybe your father could help me after all. If anything, I can just pretend you were able to take control again and came back on your own until I figure something else out," Selim decided, leaving Pride quiet. It definitely wasn't a very good plan, but he had nothing else. Maybe it would be better to just go to the homunculi, instead of waiting for them to eventually find him. At the very least, they wouldn't be expecting it.
It took just as long to get out of the forest as it had to get inside, and by the time he made it to the outskirts of Central City, the sun had already risen. It was still a bit dark though, the sky an overcast from the rain he hadn't noticed the night before. It was probably going to start up again, but hopefully he'd have found that entrance to the underground tunnel system before that happened.
He couldn't believe he was actually doing this, but quickly pushed that thought from his mind. He couldn't psyche himself out. It was a stupid, terrible plan that was probably going to get him killed, and Pride wasn't saying a word for fear of accidentally triggering something that would get him up and fighting again. Like he'd thought before though, it was the only thing he had.
It was nearly noon when he finally managed to find the run down, hidden entrance that he'd left the underground lair with Greed from quite some time ago now. Well, this was it. He still had no clue was he was doing, but at least it was something. If anything, maybe this whole struggle would be over soon. He still didn't want to die though, and he was going to fight with all his might to keep that from happening.
Taking a deep breath, Selim masked any of the emotions raging inside him with the indifferent smug expression that he imagined Pride to wear. He managed to keep himself from flinching at the sound of his footsteps echoing around the tunnel as he walked down the small flight of steps.
Well, he was either going to get back home now, or die trying.
Hurray, finished. I'm terribly sorry, this chapter just seems like Selim moping around and nothing happening, and then when it finally seems to get somewhere, I end it. It wasn't coming to me very well, but I think I have it now, and will try to get the next chapter up a bit faster in order to make up for this. Sadly the key word it try, since I'm going to start being super busy soon. Don't worry though, I'll always make room for my fan fictions, because I have an unhealthy obsession that way : )
Well, I hope you liked this chapter anyway, and please drop a review.