I am so sorry it has took me so long to get this chapter up, i don't think i could apologize enough!

So i struggled a bit through this chapter, having to stop for a bit with the intention of picking it back up when life got in the way, (stupid real life)

Anyway its here now so i hope you all can forgive me?

Hope everyone likes it...

Okay Bella, you will be fine, you can get through this.

I was giving myself a mental pep talk as I was driving to the restaurant. I decided to drive myself as then I had a way of escape if anything were to go as bad as I thought it would.

Arriving at the restaurant I saw Jasper waiting outside the entrance. God he looked delicious. He was wearing a charcoal button down with black dress pants, nothing too fancy but he didn't need to wear anything over the top to look amazing.

He had a slight worried look on him until he spotted me walking towards him. Then he had that beautiful smile that I loved.

He started to walk towards me, immediately wrapping his arms around me. "You look stunning" I could feel his breath on my ear which made me think about earlier making me blush. "I love you; we can do this, it's fine"

"I love you too. I'm not sure I can though" I took a deep breath "but I'm going to have to so we might as well get it over with"

He gave me a small smile and took my hand leading me into the restaurant. Just as we got to the entrance he placed a kiss on my hand and then let go. I was disappointed instantly even though I knew if I turned up holding Jaspers hand it would get people talking.

I could hear my brothers booming laugh as soon as we had got through the door. I smiled to myself thinking of how happy he seemed to be, I couldn't wait to see him.

"There they are" Alice was the first to notice our arrival, announcing to everyone that we were here.

I just smiled at everyone, making my way around, saying hello.

"Hey" I saved Edward till last, not sure how it was going to go. However he surprised me by giving me a tight hug and kissing me.

"Hey love, I'm sorry about last night, I wasn't thinking. I should never have left" He apologised with a sombre look. "Forgive me?"

"It should be me apologising, I'm sorry I never told you I don't know what I was thinking" I chanced a look at his eyes, they didn't seem to have any sign of anger in them.

"How about we just enjoy tonight and talk tomorrow?" he suggested.

"Sure" I agreed, I didn't see how we could talk here anyway. "As long as we do talk?"

"We will"

The night didn't seem to be going as bad as I thought, even with the embarrassing stories Emmett decided to contribute also the strange knowing looks he was giving me that I didn't understand.

I had just come out of the bathroom when I spotted Jasper standing near the door.

"I just wanted to make sure you were doing ok?" he's so sweet "it didn't seem to be too bad between you and Edward right?"

"Everything's fine, I'm fine" I looked around to make sure no one could see and then placed a quick kiss to his lips "Don't worry"

"Ha, I knew it!" I froze; I just kept my gaze on Jasper. "I knew there was something going on with you two; you've both been acting strange"

"Emmett, I can explain…" Jasper started but was quickly cut off.

"Can I talk to her for a sec?" Emmett asked. Jasper just nodded his head, glanced at me, then gave me a small peck on my forehead and then left.

"Bella, please turn around" I felt his hand on my shoulder, motioning for me to face him.

When I turned around, Emmett pulled me into a hug, anticipating the comfort he was sure I would need. "I'm sorry…" I still didn't know what to say but I thought sorry was a good start.

"You've got yourself in a bit of pickle here haven't you" he sighed, trying to wipe the tears that had started to fall. "How about we leave here and you tell me everything, that sound okay?"

I nodded my head yes, finding some relief in the fact that I could talk to someone.

"You go to your car, I'll make some excuse"

"I love you" I had to tell him, he was being so considerate towards me.

"I love you too bells" he gave my shoulder a slight squeeze.

I was now sat in my apartment, recalling to Emmett everything that had happened regarding Jasper. It was nice to tell someone, to not have it be as much of a secret anymore.

"He really makes you happy" Emmett had stated as I was telling him about the little cottage we had found. "That smile, you don't get that smile on your face when talking about Edward"

I couldn't help but keep smiling and agree with him. The thought of Jasper alone gave me butterflies and Goosebumps. "I think it's always been Jasper in a way, I just didn't see it" I told Emmett, who nodded his head.

"I think we all thought at some point you would end up together. You were always so close, closer than friends ever are that's for sure" he chuckled slightly "There was a time I thought one of you had plucked up the courage to tell the other, but the feeling wasn't mutual"

"What made you think that?" I was curious.

"Well" he took a breath "before you both went off to college, you were acting different, you were still quite close but then shy and distant at the same time as if there was something going on. I wasn't sure what it was, but it was out of character for both of you"

Of course my brother spotted something different, it was at that time me and jasper were discussing the whole sex issue, me trying to convince him it was what I really wanted.

"I wish one of us had that courage" I sighed "it would have made a whole load of things easier and clearer"

Emmett just looked at me, deciding what to say next. "Can I ask, was there something going on?" he paused "It was strange, the two of you acting like that"

"well, I'm not sure if you're going to like this" I looked over towards my brother, thinking about how he thought I had wanted to wait, how I had lied to him about it as well, I felt shame as I thought about lying to his face. I saw the concern for me on his face, making me feel worse, and then he just nodded telling me to continue. "I had this kind of fantasy I suppose that my first time would be with him; I couldn't imagine it with anyone else. Then I got scared the week before college, that I would be that virgin that everyone made fun of" I stopped for a bit, composing myself. "I told jasper, he wasn't too happy about it, I wasn't sure why at the time, I understand now. I asked him if we could, a few times actually he wasn't saying yes, but then he did" I stopped there not sure of the reaction Emmett would have of finding out the truth and looked down at my lap waiting. It was a while before he brought his hands to my chin, lifting my head up to meet his gaze.

"I can't say I'm not shocked, that was not what I thought had gone on" he smiled at me "Don't worry, I know your scared I'm going to be mad, but I'm not okay" he motioned for me to come and sit next to him. I did immediately, hugging him almost automatically.

"I'm sorry..." I couldn't finish as a sob had broken from my chest stopping me.

"Hey, don't" he moved the hair from my face, looked straight at me and said "you don't have anything to be sorry for" he paused again for a moment, thinking. "Is that why you and Edward were fighting the other night?"

He always knew, like he had some sort of sixth sense or something. I just nodded, not sure what to tell him that he couldn't guess.

"He needed to know Bella, don't feel guilty that he's upset, alright"

I was about to reply but was interrupted by my phone going off, looking at the screen I saw it was jasper.

"Hey Jasper" I spoke his name, telling Emmett who it was.

"Hi, I just wanted to check all was okay" Jasper replied in a caring tone.

"Yeh its fine, don't worry" I answered him.

"Okay, good" I heard him take a breath "well I just wanted to check you were okay, maybe I will see you later?"

"Sure" I couldn't help but smile at the thought of seeing him "that would be great"

"Great" I could hear the smile in his voice "I'll call you, see later, love you"

"Okay, love you" I just couldn't get used to hearing him saying those words or saying them back.

After hanging up I looked up to see Emmett smiling at me which just made me smile back.

"Love you eh?" I just nodded, looking to my hands in my lap suddenly feeling shy "I'm glad your happy bells, but you can't keep it a secret, you know that right?"

"I know" I tried to stop the tears from falling, thinking about telling Edward "I just don't know how and everyone's going to hate me"

Noticing the tears in my eyes, Emmett sat by me and wrapped me up in his warm arms. "You have me and you have jasper" I looked up at him "everyone else will understand, if not now they will in time"

I tried to believe him but I couldn't help the thoughts that came into my head, couldn't help thinking of not only am I going to breaking Edwards heart but also my best friends which I just couldn't think I could deal with.

Well what do you all think?

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Love you all,

xxx