"I'm a damsel. I'm in distress. I can handle this. Have a nice day."

–Meg, from Hercules

"Neville, you can't fall asleep now," Ginny said, giving my shoulder a tiny shove.

"Sorry," I yawned. "I'm just tired." We were in the middle of another one of our graffiti projects and we had only been back at school for a day. I had sat on the ground to start painting the lower part of the words, but apparently I had started to doze off, my forehead against the wall.

"Look, you smudged it," Ginny said, pointing to the lower part of the "A" I was painting. We were simply writing "Dumbledore's Army" this time, but it seemed to be taking forever.

"I didn't mean to," I answered. "Do I have paint all over my forehead now?"

"Yes, you look like an idiot," Ginny answered with a small laugh. She quickly waved her wand and cleared my forehead.

"Thanks," I sighed, stretching my legs out in front of me and leaning back on my palms.

Ginny put the last finishing touches on the "R" she was painting before brushing off her hands and sitting next to me. "Break time," she announced.

"We really can't afford to take a break. We might get caught," I told her. I could hear the exhaustion in my voice.

"Do we really care?" Ginny asked. "We've already been scratched and beaten a few too many times."

"True," I said. "Gran only managed to heal a few of my minor injuries. Some of them were too bad for even her to touch."

"You really do look awful, Neville. The Carrows have really beaten you up.

"That's probably for the best. I'd rather take most of the blame over you and Luna."

"Luna and I are just as in on this as you are," Ginny argued.

"Well, not so much Luna anymore," I answered bitterly.

"Is that why you haven't been sleeping properly?"

"What makes you think I haven't been sleeping properly?"

"You just fell asleep against the wall, or did you forget already?" Ginny raised an eyebrow at me.

"That's just from sneaking out at night to do the graffiti," I said, shrugging it off.

"Right, we've been back at school for a day. This is the first time we've been out since we've gotten back. Nice try."

"It's nearly three in the morning. It's way past my bedtime," I tried.

"How old are you? Seven?" Ginny laughed. "Again, nice try. I know it's because of Luna. I don't blame you, you know."

I didn't answer right away. I just stared straight ahead at the paint on the wall in front of us. "It's hard to sleep when I don't even know if she's okay. I don't know where they took her or what they did to her. I just feel desperate for any information I can get, but it's almost impossible to get any." I finally looked over at Ginny. "Is this how you felt when Harry left?"

Ginny nodded sadly. "I still feel that way sometimes. It gets better. A little."

"A little," I said with a bitter laugh. "At least if something happens to Harry, everyone will know about it. With Luna, they could have dumped her somewhere and we'd never know."

"Don't say that," Ginny said in a whisper, squeezing her eyes shut. "I don't want to think about that."

"Neither do I," I answered.

Ginny took a deep breath and stood up, holding her hand out to me. "Okay, break time's over. Let's get back to work."

I nodded in agreement. "Let's do it."

The next night, I sank down into a chair by the fire in the Gryffindor common room before putting my head in my hands. I had just come back from a nasty detention with the Carrows. They had probably figured that the D.A. just had too many people and they could never pin the blame on just one person because there was just no proof. They had seemed to figure out that I was behind a lot of it and the one giving the orders, so they apparently decided to give me a detention for every stunt the D.A. pulled.

"Neville, are you okay?"

I looked up to see Seamus standing over me. "I'm fine, Seamus," I said quietly.

"You're shaking and your hand's bleeding. Did they make you use the quill?"

I nodded. "Cruciatus Curse, too."

"They're torturing you pretty badly," Seamus said nervously. "I mean, what happens if they catch one of us?"

"They probably know I'm in charge, but just make sure you don't get caught. If they don't catch anyone, they'll blame me."

Seamus didn't say anything for a minute. "We can't let you take the blame for everything."

"But you don't want to get tortured. You're afraid, aren't you?"

"Neville, of course we're all scared. This place isn't-," he stopped and took a breath. "It's not the same."

"I know that. That's why I'm doing what I'm doing, but if you're afraid, then don't be a part of the D.A. anymore. It's okay." Seamus was silent. I looked up to see him staring at me oddly. "What?" I asked.

"What's happened to you, Neville?"

I figured he was talking about my injuries, so I began rattling them off, but he interrupted me.

"I meant that you're not the same kid I knew in first year."

"Everyone changes," I said, shrugging and staring into the fire.

"Yeah, but you've changed the most. I think that kind of scares me more than the Carrows."

"I'm sick of everyone thinking I'm worthless," I said, not taking my eyes off the fire, "and I'm sick of these people just taking away everyone that I love. I want it to stop and if that means I have to do something about it myself, then that's how it's going to be."

Seamus nodded. "We're not going to give up, Neville."

"I thought you were scared."

"I am, but I didn't get put into Gryffindor for nothing. And Gryffindor isn't the only house with brave people, either. I think the entire D.A. is going to keep fighting. We didn't join and learn all those spells for just for them to go to waste."

"Why didn't you feel this way last year?" I asked. "Hardly anyone answered the messages on the coins when Death Eaters attacked the castle."

Seamus didn't answer right away. "I think it just took us longer to understand what the D.A. really meant. It probably took a few attacks for us to see that we really need this right now. We need something to hold us together. And if it took this war and the prospect of losing people to make us see that, then, well," he shrugged, "better late than never, right?"

"The D.A. always meant something to me," I confessed. "You said I changed. Maybe being in the D.A. did that."

"I think it was a lot of things," Seamus said. "I think Luna had a lot to do with it."

"Luna?" I asked, looking up.

"Yeah, she's really good for you, Neville. She's really not that bad once she shuts up about Wrackspurts. You know, I still don't even know what they are."

"The fly in your ears and make your brain go fuzzy," I said automatically.

"Ah," Seamus answered.

I looked up and smiled. "I'm surprised you got the name right."

"So am I, to be honest," Seamus answered. He turned to go. "Are you going to be all right? You look terrible."

"I'm fine, Seamus, thanks," I said with a tiny smile. He nodded and walked away. I turned back to the fire and stared into it, thinking about what Seamus had said. I was glad that the others weren't planning on giving up. They were terrified but they were going to face their fears. That was what I had always struggled with as a kid and I think the D.A. helped me with that and maybe Seamus was right, too. I probably would be an entirely different person if I had never met Luna.

Just thinking about her made me feel anxious and upset all over again. I needed her, but my Gran had been right in saying that I could be strong on my own. I could do this. I could keep the D.A. going with Ginny and probably by the time Luna got back, the war would be over.

"Positive thinking," I muttered to myself.

"How long ago do you think Christmas was?" Ollivander asked me one day.

I thought for a moment. It was already getting harder and harder for me to figure out the days and I had only been here for a little while. I could only imagine what it must have felt like for Ollivander.

"Well, I got here two days before Christmas," I said. It had also been two days after my two year anniversary with Neville, but I didn't say that. It made me really happy to think about Neville, but at the same time, it kind of made me sad.

"How long ago was that?" Ollivander asked.

I thought for a few seconds more. "I don't know, maybe about two weeks? I wish I had thought of it before. I could have done something festive."

"Like what?" Ollivander asked. "The only thing down here with us is this rusty nail."

"I don't know," I shrugged. "Having my wand sure would have been useful."

"If you had your wand," Ollivander chuckled, "we wouldn't have to be locked down here in the first place."

"That's very true," I agreed, nodding my head. There was a pause. "Do you remember how many stones we counted up to?"

"No, I'm sorry," Ollivander replied sadly. "I lost count."

"Me too," I answered. "I suppose we could start over."

"We've got time, right?" Ollivander said with a smile.

"Lots of it," I answered, sighing. As much as I didn't want to admit it, I was getting tired of this basement. You-Know-Who didn't seem to need information to torture out of Ollivander anymore and I hadn't been any use to them. All I was here for was to bribe my father into behaving. They were probably waiting for him to print a wanted ad for Harry, which wouldn't happen until the next issue came out in January. My father always printed every month without fail. If I had calculated the time correctly, we were going into the second week of January, so maybe I'd be getting out soon. It all depended on when my father did what the Death Eaters wanted.

That night, when a Death Eater, who I believe was named Scabior, brought our dinner, I asked him about my father.

"He's not printing," he answered in an annoyed tone.

"He's not?" I asked, surprised. It was serious if he wasn't printing.

"He will eventually," Scabior said. "We'll convince him to. It's not that hard. All he has to do is print one wanted ad and then distribute it in that silly magazine."

So I had been right about the wanted ad. "It's not a silly magazine at all," I said.

"He's been begging for us to give you back," Scabior continued with a sneer. "We've told him, though, he won't be getting you back until he either prints the wanted ad or hands over Harry Potter himself."

I felt terrible for my dad. He must be extremely torn. Both of us had always believed and supported Harry and now my dad was practically being forced to turn against him.

"What about Mr. Ollivander?" I asked. "When is he allowed to leave?"

Scabior smirked and shrugged. "Don't know. I don't make the rules, I just follow them." He sneered down at me and moved my hair aside with his wand while he looked at my ear. "Nice earrings. What are they supposed to be, bushes?"

"Mistletoe," I answered.

"How festive," Scabior snorted.

"Oh, yes, and this charm," I held up the charm on the necklace I was wearing, "well, it keeps away the Nargles."

"The Nargles!" Scabior let out a loud barking laugh. "The Malfoy boy said everyone at Hogwarts called you Looney. Now I can see why!" He turned and left the room, locking us back in. I could hear him laughing all the way up the stairs.

"He laughs," I said to Ollivander, "but he'll be sorry once the Nargles get him."

A/N: Thanks for reading and don't forget to review!