Of course Kotesu was worried sick. As Barnaby's partner in more ways than one, he was affected by the entire scenario almost as much as Barnaby himself. When his Bunny's moods changed, so did Kotetsu's. When his Bunny was upset, Kotetsu became worried. And when his Bunny was sick like this, dreaming and hallucinating and now seizing, Kotetsu was far beyond worried. His fear for Barnaby's well-being manifested itself into a type of physical illness not unlike the literal pangs of grief he had suffered for months, years even, on Tomoe's behalf.

And yet his trust and confidence in his lover never once faltered. He and Barnaby had been through too much together for their belief in one another to be broken. When Barnaby made a decision, Kotetsu didn't question his judgment. Barnaby was one of the most intelligent people, if not the most intelligent person he had ever met. Anger often clouded his reason, but there had been no fiery rage in Barnaby's eyes in the hospital room when he had told Kotetsu to call Dr. Spring. He had been calm. Weak, yes, but perfectly calm, and as a result Kotetsu had not even hesitated in stepping from the room where Barnaby lay and dialing the psychiatrist's number. He had no idea what "treatment" Barnaby was talking about, but it didn't matter.

At this point, it was clear to Kotetsu that Barnaby needed whatever help he could get.

The conversation was brief; Kotetsu made sure to keep it so. Every moment he spent away from Barnaby's side, despite being separated by only a single wall, he became more and more sick to his stomach as it tied itself into nervous knots. He assured Dr. Spring, who seemed almost overly concerned, that Barnaby was both awake and coherent and had made his decision with confidence.

Amaranthe's cautious tone whenever she mentioned the new therapy she had in mind made Kotetsu uneasy, but remaining informed was not as important to him at the moment as it was to get back to Barnaby. He would ask about it later, once Barnaby was fully recovered but before he went in for his next appointment.

"I'll make the preparations, Kotetsu. Thank you so much for calling me. I was worried sick about him."

Worried sick, huh? Kotetsu thought wryly. You don't know the half of it.

"Just have him give me a ring when he's better. Until then, keep in touch?"

Kotetsu mumbled out as polite an affirmation as he could manage before pocketing his cell phone and opening the door back up to Barnaby's room all in one swift movement.

The young man was sitting up, now, though his eyes were tired and his complexion too pale. "What did she say?" he asked, his tone almost too eager for his condition.

Kotetsu sighed and slid his hand through Barnaby's tangled curls. "She's worried about you. She'll make preparations for the therapy. Call her when you're better. That's it. But Bunny, I'm not worried about that. I'm worried about you. What happened?"

Barnaby's excitement deadened immediately, his gaze kept stationary straight ahead, staring at nothing. "I don't know, exactly." That wasn't entirely true, and he knew it. "Well, I do. But it's hard to explain, Kotetsu. It's hard to explain unless you've seen it." His voice grew more and more distant as he spoke, fading softly into a detached whisper.

Well, that wasn't much to go on. Kotetsu pried more, anyway.

"Seen what?"

Barnaby hung his head. His lips moved soundlessly for a moment, and Kotetsu managed to catch the gleam of a single tear that fell from the tip of Barnaby's nose. He looked up at Kotetsu then, eyes glazed over with tears but suddenly holding a healthier appearance as he did his best to recover from the haze his manipulated mind had trapped him in. Determination had always been Barnaby's strong point, and it made Kotetsu's heart leap to see it shining through so fervently even now, in this difficult time.

"That ball of light," Barnaby began hesitantly, now looking Kotetsu dead straight in the eye. "That ball of light that formed in his hand before he..."

Kotetsu understood Barnaby's pause. "I know, Bunny. You don't have to say it. Go on," he urged. "Go on. What about it?"

Barnaby swallowed hard and tried again. "When you see something again and again, and then you learn that that something brings you grief, you learn to grow afraid of it." Did that make sense? Barnaby wasn't sure, but since Kotetsu's eyes remained fixed expectantly on him he mustered up his next sentence amidst a deep breath and kept going. "An example. Pretend for a moment that you know a child. That child has a sweet, loving father, but his father's personality changes drastically when he's drunk. The child's father is an alcoholic. The child loves his father dearly, and his father loves him in return. But every night the child sees him return home with a bottle in hand, something bad happens. His father yells at him. Maybe he hits the boy. Maybe he hurts the kid's mother. It doesn't take long, even for a young child, to begin to associate that bottle with the fear he feels during his father's drunken fits. It's a conditioned response. Happens to everyone. Basic psychology."

Kotetsu couldn't keep the slight smirk from his face. "You've been hanging around Dr. Spring too much. You're becoming a right psychologist, Bunny."

The look he received from Barnaby in return was not one of amusement. "My point is, Kotetsu, that the child's conditioned response may affect him for the remainder of his life, even when his father is long gone. He may see a liquor bottle twenty years in the future, and if he's been traumatized badly enough, he'll be afraid of that bottle despite the fact that his father is nowhere near him, perhaps even dead. Do you understand?"

A nod. It was simple enough. Like Barnaby had said, basic psychology.

"Now consider this." Barnaby's mind was working in over-drive now, as if the illness that had landed him in the hospital in the first place had also been a major source of inspiration for figuring out his own damaged mind.

"The conditional response of fear is still valid, but the affected party can't remember exactly what the trigger for the fear is. Therefore, when it seems that his panicked response is triggered by completely random objects or situations, those triggers aren't actually random at all. He just doesn't know it."

"You're referring to yourself, now," Kotetsu inserted, following along just as easily as Barnaby had hoped he would.

"Exactly. What happened in Amaranthe's office, well, was likely caused by a similar situation. She mentioned another NEXT who had previously helped her with her research. This NEXT has a power, so she claimed, very similar to Maverick's. The moment she said that, I glimpsed the light from one of the lamps on the table beside us and everything in my head went haywire. I know from third parties that whenever Maverick used his power, a bright blue ball of light was somehow involved. However, since my memories were being erased and altered along with the presence of that light, I should never be able to remember seeing it for myself. Right?"

Kotetsu nodded slowly, his mind having to work harder to keep up now that complication of mind alteration was involved. He motioned with his hand for Barnaby to continue, regardless.

"I saw that light. She mentioned another NEXT with Maverick's power. I, naturally, became afraid. Glimpsing the lamp beside us further triggered that fear-response stimulus that's in my sub conscience and I panicked. I saw Maverick in front of me with Maverick's light. I saw it coming towards me just as I would have seen right as my memories were being altered. Do you see? That's my first memory! I shouldn't have been able to see that, but I did. I felt like I was experiencing the memory swiping as it happened. Do you see? It's like working backwards. My first recovered memory is of my memories being erased!"

Barnaby's partner leaned back in the chair he had pulled up to Barnaby's bedside and crossed his arms, pondering the situation.

So Dr. Spring's treatments were working. Barnaby had recovered his first memory, just as he had hoped to do from the very beginning.

But the point that Barnaby was missing which Kotetsu saw so clearly was the effect of memory recovery on Barnaby's body. Every time he remembered something, would he have a seizure and pass out? Would he be hospitalized for every tiny thing uncovered in his mind? And what if the memory was bigger, somehow, more important? Could Barnaby's body withstand it at all?

Kotetsu shook his head slowly, and it was immediately obvious to Barnaby that something was wrong.

For the first time since Barnaby began attending sessions with Amaranthe, Kotetsu looked doubtful.

"Kotetsu?"

No, he couldn't discourage Barnaby. That was out of the question. Kotetsu perked up immediately and forced a tired smile onto his face to cover for the grimace that had been there a moment before.

"It's nothing, Bunny. You're in the hospital, so of course I'm worried, but it's really nothing. You're figuring yourself out, and you remembered something. I-I'm happy for you! I really am!" He reached out to take one of Barnaby's hands in his own and kiss the fingers softly, one at a time, before leaning forward to rest his forehead on the sheets beside Barnaby's shoulder.

I've got a horrible feeling about this.