FIVE

"Why don't we go outside for a while?" Edward proposed when we saw Alice and Jasper were getting serious in the couch.

We went outside and I was holding the skirt of the dress with one hand and holding Edward's hand with the other. It was dark, but I could see as if it was day. I could see the snow clearly and every night insect flying too. Gross.

"Lauren is here" I blurted out without thinking. I wasn't totally sure, but... she had smiled, why would she smile if she didn't know what I was talking about?

"What?!" Edward almost shouted.

"He- I think he likes Irina, she likes him at least… but I think he is afraid of you killing him…"

Edward was grim now. "Don't- don't hurt him… if he comes, I mean, Irina loves him and he doesn't have the fault James bit me…"

He nodded not really convinced.

I sat on the chilly snow (that didn't affect me) and looked up at him.

We had been walking far from the house and now we were almost in the white forest surrounding the house.

Edward sat next to me and touched my cheek slowly and delicately, like I was still human and fragile.

I wanted to show him I wasn't, I wanted him to see I was as strong as him, so I held his face hard between my hands and kissed him with all my strength.

I slipped my hands trough his hair and he held me tight by my waist.

It wasn't enough, he still treated me like a breakable doll, I moaned in frustration and pushed him until I was on top of him on the grass.

"I love you" I told him fiercely between kisses.

He was kissing me softly and trying to hold me, to slow me down, but I was angry. I was angry with him for not understanding I hated being weak, hated being breakable, hated that he treated me like I was breakable when I was not.

But suddenly — and I don't know what string I pulled that finally got to him — he groaned in desperation and abruptly, he was on top of me and kissing me back hard and passionately.

"Bella" he said softly and then we heard someone else saying my name, only this time, it was Alice and she sounded frantic.

We got up at the same time and ran hand in hand to the house.

Alice was walking anxiously trough the room.

"Alice, what's up?"

"I think it's good… María is not coming anymore, but the woman and the man are coming… so…"

I opened my mouth to say something but not a sound came out.

In that instant, Carlisle, Esme, Eleazar and Carmen were home, they all had gotten home in Eleazar's Roll Royce.

"What's wrong?" Eleazar asked when he saw we were all too quiet.

"Oh Alice, Bella, you too look amazing" said Esme oblivious to the situation.

Carmen smiled.

Alice told them the story in seconds and they all went open-mouthed.

"I don't know what to say, Jasper?" Eleazar said "María, why would she come? Or send someone?"

"I don't know!" Jasper said, I could feel his frustration "I— obviously there would be tons of reasons for her — or her subordinates — to come here."

"Let's stay calm, if she only sends two people, it isn't really important" Carlisle said.

"Yes, maybe is just to check" Carmen proposed.

"Yeah, but to check what?" I asked.

They all stared at me.

"I don't see them attacking, we can — could — kill them if they attacked, right? They aren't a danger" Alice proposed.

"Okay, let's say they attack, why? Why would they attack?"

"I abandoned her, I left her and maybe she resents me"

"Of course, but if she's just trying to get her vengeance, why only send two vampires? It sounds illogical for a vampire like her — with a lot of experience in wars — to send to unprotected vampires to a house full of well prepared vampires."

It was Edward who spoke, and he did it with a cold and measured calm that made me shiver.

The next day on school, we were all on edge.

Alice and Jasper were always wary. I didn't know if they thought María was going to jump out of a locker but Jasper didn't send me the — now welcomed — happiness the day before I so much dreaded.

Kate was silent. After they came back, they joined our conversation, arguing with us of why María was sending the boy and the girl.

Edward was holding my hand all the time; he had decided to come with us in the Lamborghini while Alice went in the SUV with Jasper.

"I have to go to Biology, see you in History" I told him as I entered Biology with Kate.

It was weird not to be in Biology with Edward.

We sat and I tried not to note the people looking at us.

"You know what is weird?" I asked Kate in a murmur.

She looked at me with curiosity, like many other students around me.

"Last week? I was happily in Forks, being normal. And if someone new came and looked like me or you or Edward, I would have looked at them just as they are looking at us; okay maybe I would have been more subtle, but hey, I am just saying I don't blame them."

I sighed as the teacher came in— just as a note slipped on my desk.

I looked at Kate skeptical. "No way" she mouthed.

I opened it, "Hey, I'm Bliss Mackenzie, I totally love your hair!"

I showed Kate the note, still incredulous and she snickered.

"Suck up?" I mouthed.

"Yeah" she said still laughing.

"Would you like to share something Miss Swan?" the teacher said.

I hid the note on my pocket fast — fast enough for him not to notice — and grabbed the biology book I had on my bag.

"I am sorry Mr. Doyle, do you need my book?" I said showing him the book I had now in my hands.

"Don't distract Miss Whitlock, Miss Swan" the teacher said and started again his ramble about an animal that lived in South Africa.

When the class ended, Bliss attacked us with questions.

"OMG! Your hair is so perfect!" she gushed, two of her friends were next to her too, but more like lost puppies than friends.

"Thanks" I said while Kate tried not to laugh.

"Edward Cullen is your boyfriend right?" she asked.

"Yes, he is" I said coldly.

"Alice is your sister and her boyfriend is the blond tall one, right? Jasper Whitlock," she said all this in a rush, like she had it memorized "your brother" she said Kate.

Kate nodded, still smiling and trying hard not to laugh.

It was hard for me, too. Bliss had black straight hair and blue eyes.

Her two puppies were brown-haired and green-eyed twins.

"Okay, my brother, as Bella's boyfriend and Bella's sister are waiting for us there" Kate said pointing to were Alice, Jasper and Edward were waiting, grim-faced and stone-cold "So we must go."

"Bye, Bliss" I said as Kate led me to them.

Edward instantly kissed me on my forehead and hugged me hard.

"God, that class was definitely the longest class I ever had" he said, breathing in my hair "You don't know how much I feared for you."

"Edward!" I protested, "First, I am a vampire now" I hissed in his ear "and second, María is not coming, only her two flimsy newborns."

Alice shuddered and Jasper put a hand on her cheek.

A peace invaded me and I was sure it was not coming from me, but from Jasper.

I was sure it affected the ones close to us as some of them smiled and others stopped walking altogether.

"Sorry" Edward said, once again to my hair.

I stepped back, and instantly saw Edward's pain; he thought I was rejecting him.

"I love you" I reassured him hugging him close once again, but quickly releasing him.

"Alice, do you really think they are a threat to us?" I asked.

"No, I mean, we have to be careful but this two newborns are nothing to us, I can see them coming but I don't see them attacking." She said, even though her words were encouraging, her tone was hesitant, as if she didn't completely believe it herself.

When we went to lunch, Bliss waved me and most of the people around me glared at her awestruck.

"Try not to be too friendly, Bella, it's too dangerous" Edward murmured in my ear. I instantly gave Bliss my back, knowing it would hurt her but also knowing it was for her own good, right?

"I hate it" I said to him "I hate it we have to separate ourselves, like a cult, like we are unfriendly. I am not saying I miss Jessica, but in some way I do, and Angela and Mike too," Edward tensed when I named Mike "God, you can't still be jealous about him, right?"

He grimaced.

"God, Edward!" I exclaimed "I am with you! I am not human anymore! I am going to live with you forever, isn't it enough for you?"

"It is" he said "as it is also true that it hurts me that you had to give up your life to be with me."

"You are being irrational; I say I miss it, okay? I am not saying I regret it!" I was so mad at him for not understanding, I forgot we were still in the lunch line, surrounded by humans too eager to hear what the weird new "Pretty" people had to say.

I growled at Edward and said "I love you, you are the only thing I need to survive, you are my life; I need you to understand I didn't loose my life when James changed me, I won a new one and of course I will always miss my old one but it doesn't mean I regret changing."

After my long speech, Edward was smiling at me, but the smile didn't reach his eyes.

His golden eyes were dead (and in more than one way), his smile was fake; he was trying to make me feel right, to make me think he was okay with it, even though he wasn't.

Was it that he didn't love me? Did he regret saving me from James? Did he wish I was still human and forbidden? Did he only love me for that? Being forbidden?

Hurt and almost sobbing (without tears), I walked away without a word toward Kate.

"Can I have your keys? I need a ride in the Lamborghini to calm down a bit."

"Yeah, sure" she said handing me her keys.

I walked in the same awe from the cafeteria to the parking lot, straight to the electric-blue Lamborghini.

"Are you going to ditch school for the rest of the day?" said a quiet voice behind me.

I looked back, to find Bliss with a sad face and an apple on her hands.

"Yes, I think I will" I muttered. I started walking again.

She followed me, "what did you fight over with him?"

She asked it delicately, still, I didn't take it good.

I spoon around fast, faster than a human, stunned by her question.

"He thinks I regret leaving my hometown." I said, we had gotten to the Lamborghini but I didn't get in.

"I don't." I told her "I just miss it a little bit."

"I understand…"

I knew she didn't, I knew she probably would tell all the school about this, but I didn't care.

I needed someone from the outside to talk to, and Bliss was a perfect option.

Maybe Bliss was a little too airhead, but hey, she wasn't completely stupid.

Her black hair now stood on a loose bun high on her hair, her blue eyes shone with emotion, an emotion I didn't recognize.

"You probably don't, but… it's okay, my situation is a bit difficult to understand, so…"

I turned to leave but she stopped me when she talked.

"You lived in Forks" she said, I held my breath — even when I didn't needed to breath any more, the habit was difficult to forget — "your father was the Chief of the police, he thinks you are dead, why would you do this to him?"

I breathed again when I realized that she didn't know a thing, she just thought I had ran away.

"I— no, you don't understand…"

"Did he hit you?"

"No"

"Did he rape you?"

"No!"

"Did he try to hurt you in any way?"

"No!"

"Then, of course I won't ever understand why you left your family and flew away with your boyfriend when your dad loved you so much and all the town is mourning for you — thinking you were kidnapped, possibly killed — while you are here calmly going to school and pretending everything is okay!"

I was stunned by how much this girl new about me, about my town, my family and my old life.

So I did something that shocked her, but I think I was the most shocked person in the deserted parking lot.

[First— I need to remember all of you that I my first language is Spanish, so my English may be a little wrong or something…

And I am of course writing more and trying to hurry up, but it's summer and it's hot and my ideas don't come out easily,, so sorry if the next chapter is going to have to wait for a couple of days (maybe not).

I love reviews because it makes me see what I do wrong, so if you have something that may help me, well review…

XOXO Paula]