Changing Perceptions
A James and Lily Fan-Fiction
Part Five—Winter
Christmas
Lily watched the snow fall from her spot at the window seat, the flakes forming little drifts against the etched glass of the window. Even though winter was her favourite season, the past few weeks have been very solemn and mournful. After returning from home once his father's estate was settled, James was withdrawn, not just from her, but from his three best friends as well. Oh, he put on a good show, that was for sure, but she could always see that his smile never reached his eyes and his laughter wasn't as rich as it usually was.
She lay her head back, resting it on James' shoulder. The two of them could be found seated in one of the window seats, snuggled up underneath a quilt or crocheted blanket most nights. Nothing was said to "publicly announce" their relationship, but everyone knew, and if they didn't, they were blind. They held hands in the corridors; they sat next to each other at meals; they studied together and stayed up late talking (really, only talking). As far as their physical relationship went, things had paused for the time being and hadn't progressed beyond what was already familiar territory. She wasn't complaining; she loved spending time with him. There were just parts of her that wanted…more.
"Pretty, isn't it?" he asked her, leaning into her neck.
"Mmm hmm," she whispered and snuggled into him a bit more. "Looks like everyone left."
He turned his head toward the common room, which was now empty, save for someone's cat.
"Guess so. You tired?"
"No. I slept in late today, remember?" She never let herself sleep in on the weekends, but she'd been so emotionally drained after exams that she allowed herself the luxury.
"Turn around," he ordered softly, turning her toward him.
When she was looking at him, she found his eyes dark and…lustful. She swallowed against the rise of desire in herself.
"What?"
"I…I…oh, bollocks," he stammered, surprising her by kissing her forcefully on the mouth, startling her and arousing her at the same time.
Their tongues began a wild dance and their hands were busy with buttons and zippers as they tugged and pulled to get what they wanted. His mouth was on her bared breast, sucking the nipple into his mouth, hungrily sucking while she dipped her hands inside the back waistband of his jeans, savouring the feel of the firm flesh of his buttocks in her hands. One of his hands slipped inside her knickers and dipped into her, making Lily squirm.
"Mo…more! P—please!" She arched her back against the sensations he was causing inside her, the blood pounding in her ears.
"You…remember you said kissing…that kissing is the…the best thing I can do…with my…with my mouth?" James said between kisses to her neck, breasts and stomach.
Words were impossible and she nodded, remembering that conversation on the train at the beginning of September. She threaded her fingers through his hair to hold him against her chest.
"Well, there is something else I can do remarkably well with my mouth."
Her eyes grew wide and rolled back into her head as he laid her down on the window seat, which he had enlarged at some point during their snogging, and knelt on the floor before kissing her stomach and going lower and lower and lower until…
"Oh FUCK!" she screamed as his mouth began to tease her intimately. She squirmed under his oral assault until stars exploded behind her eyes and her thighs squeezed his head.
When the waves of passion subsided, she looked at James, who wore a broad, cheeky grin and was chuckling slightly. He crawled back up into the window seat and began kissing her neck.
"Enjoyed that, did you?" He was utterly pleased with himself.
With her breathing still ragged, she answered breathily, "Immensely." Seeing him like that, with that expression on his face and his eternally messy hair, emboldened her. "Lay back."
She didn't give him much choice and pushed him back onto the enlarged window seat and carefully slid his jeans and boxers down. He raised his hips, causing his cock to bounce once it was released.
"Lil…" he said hesitantly. She could tell he knew what she was going to to.
Lily watched in fascination as he grew, just from her looking at him. She'd never really seen one up so close before. Geoffrey, her former boyfriend, didn't show his to her before he took her virginity and the second time was much the same. Her eyes roamed over the strong muscle, taking in every detail, memorising the texture, colour, and size of it.
"It's…it's beautiful, James," she whispered.
Taking a deep breath, she lowered her head and awkwardly wrapped her mouth around him. He was larger than she thought and her gag reflex kicked in. She lifted up and then sank down again, careful to go slowly. James moaned and swore incoherently, his head thrashing back and forth while his back arched, sending him deeper.
"Pull…pull back," he coached and she did what she was told. "N—now, suck…like a straw."
He let out a fierce cry when she applied suction and then rubbed her tongue along the flesh. He whimpered and she took that as a good sign.
"Slide…slide up…SHIT!"
He pulsed within her mouth and her eyes widened, pulling her mouth off with a slurpy popping sound. She watched in fascination as the creamy, white fluid squirted and landed on his abdomen.
"Sorry about that," she said, a blush making its way up her neck and onto her cheeks. She sat back, a little embarrassed at what she had done.
As if sensing her mood, he sat up and gathered her in his arms, cooing soothing words into her ear.
"Don't be sorry, Lil. You…you're a quick study," he told her, his voice still a bit shaky with left over passion. "That…that was the first time, wasn't it?"
Lily lifted her head and nodded. "Both of them. So I did okay?" Even in sexual matters, she wanted to learn more, to improve on what she could already do. She would enjoy having James as her teacher.
Lily stood in front of the full length mirror in her dormitory room, turning from side to side, watching her dress swish around her thighs. Tonight was Professor Slughorn's Christmas party, and she was excited about spending the time with James. One problem with Hogwarts was that there were few social activities for the students other that Quidditch and a few clubs. The party for the privileged few of The Slug Club was the closest thing to a school dance or gathering, so she was taking advantage of it.
The dress she wore was originally the dreaded dotted Swiss that she wore for Petunia's wedding. The yellow looked good on her, she had to admit, but the fabric was all wrong. Much too summery and girly. So, with her friends' help, the dotted Swiss was transfigured into a golden taffeta. The sleeves, which originally went to her elbows, were nearly removed and capped sleeves took their place. The original neckline, which Lily dreaded to even think about, dipped low to reveal just a bit of cleavage. The full skirt was left primarily intact, falling to just above her ankles. Wizarding society wasn't quite ready for mini-skirts.
"You look great, Lils," observed Mary. "He's gonna die when he sees you."
Lily turned and studied her friend. Mary wasn't a member of The Slug Club and, therefore, wasn't going to the party. But there was something else making her look so…forlorn.
"Mary, what's wrong?" She sat down next to her on the bed. "You look…sad."
Mary took a deep breath and looked straight at Lily. "I thought I was in love with him. Back in third-year."
Lily was shocked. "James?"
"He was so nice and kissing him was…a dream," she admitted, making Lily nod her head in agreement. "He never took things too far—we were only thirteen, for Merlin's sake. But he made me feel beautiful."
"So…so you're jealous?"
"No! Honest, Lily. It just makes me sad that I couldn't make him look at me the way he looks at you—the way he's always looked at you. I've never had anyone look at me that way." A few tears escaped her eyes and she brushed them away with the back of her hand.
"What about Richard? I think you two are lovely together," she answered, trying to reassure her friend.
Mary had been dating Richard Sumners, a tall, athletic Hufflepuff in their year, since October and they appeared very happy together.
"He is, really," she said, sighing. "But he's so…careful."
Lily chuckled, understanding Mary's meaning. "Careful? Well, he is a 'puff after all."
"At least he's not a poof!" The girls giggled and Mary leaned into Lily's shoulder. "I want to do things but he's so…honourable." She shook her head, still wearing the smile.
"Don't know what to tell you then, Mare. Have you…initiated things?"
Mary never answered as a loud knock on the door startled them.
"What?" Lily barked.
The door opened at they saw a little second-year girl standing nervously in the doorway.
"What is it?" Lily asked softly. The poor girl looked scared out of her wits.
"Um…James Potter sent me up…he's tired of waiting," she stammered. "Those weren't his exact words, however. He was much more vulgar in his language, but I didn't think you'd appreciate hearing those sorts of word from me." She paused for a breath. "I also didn't want to lose points for Gryffindor. I haven't lost any all term and I'm not about to start. Anyway, he's waiting." She turned around and left, making her way down the stairs.
"Who was that?" Mary exclaimed.
Lily sniggered. "Luella Montrose. Second-year. She gets excited and starts rambling."
"Really? I hadn't noticed. If he's taken to begging Little Luella, you'd better get a move on." Mary gave Lily a push off the bed and she made her way toward the door.
Once outside the confines of the dormitory, Lily took a deep breath and made her way down the stairs, knowing that James was waiting for her. She could see that he was gathered with Remus and Sirius, both of whom weren't going to the party. She cleared her throat and met James' eyes.
"Wow."
"You look pretty good yourself," Lily answered.
He really did. He wore a set of black dress robes with velvet trim along the edge of the sleeves and along the collar. His crisp, white shirt was a sharp contrast to the outer robe and set off the royal blue cravat at his neck. She also noticed the gold pin on his tie, which she remembered was an heirloom handed down for generations. James had shown it to her the day before and explained that it was from the Peverell side of his family. The name rang a bell, but she couldn't place it. The gold of the pin was twisted into the shape of a circle with a triangle inside, and a line splitting the two shapes in half. When she asked him what it meant, he said he had no idea. No one had known for a long time.
"Ready?" he asked and extended his arm, making a grand gesture of it. He could be really charming when he put his mind to it.
"Of course," she said, beaming up at him. It felt so romantic, so wonderful to be with him like this, all dressed up. Almost like she would have wanted it to be at Petunia's wedding.
"Have fun, you two," piped in Sirius. "Don't stay out too late or the lady will turn into a troll."
"Never. I've seen her out late plenty of times, and I can tell you the last thing she is is a troll," he quipped in answer, leaning over and placing a very chaste kiss on her cheek. "You look amazing," James whispered.
"Thank you," she said, a flush slowly warming her cheeks.
"I love it when you do that."
He led her through the portrait hole and down the stairs to the entrance hall. Several couples were already gathered there, ready to make their way down to Professor Slughorn's office and rooms. She felt like a queen on James' arm and the couple of interesting looks she received from some of the other girls were downright malevolent.
They made their way down the stairs, along the familiar corridors and toward the lower levels of the castle. There was no need for a sign marking Professor Slughorn's rooms since lively music, as well as the chatter of the guests inside, could be heard all the way down the hall. The cheery Christmas music increased the excitement within her; Christmas was her favourite time of year.
"Lily! James!" boomed the voice of Horace Slughorn. "My, you two make a handsome pair." He reached out a chubby hand and enthusiastically shook James', then turned to Lily. "Miss Evans, if I were twenty years younger, I'd have to challenge James for your affections." He lifted her hand to his mouth and kissed it gallantly.
"Thank you for inviting us, sir," James said graciously.
"Oh yes, wouldn't dream of leaving the two of you out."
While Slughorn gathered Lily into his fold due to her talent at Potions, he snapped up James because of his father's wealth and his mother's work at St Mungo's. The portly professor made no excuses for gathering the talented and well-connected into his little flock; he maintained connections for years and always had someone to ask for a favour.
"Watch out for the mistletoe, you know. Hidden away where you'd least expect it," Slughorn nodded to Lily and James, leaving to greet more guests entering the room.
By looking around, one would never guess that this was a teacher's living quarters. The room was enlarged to hold at least a hundred people, even though far less were due to arrive. Evergreen boughs were decorated with colourful baubles and fairy lights; a large, decorated Christmas tree stood in the middle of the room and several groups of students were gathered around it, talking or laughing.
"D'you want something to drink?" James asked. "I think I see some mead over there."
"Butterbeer if they have it," she answered, not liking the effects mead gave her. She wanted to keep her wits about her tonight, to use the vast amount of professions represented to feel out what kind of job she could look for after she finished school. That was the best thing about The Slug Club: the tremendous amount of contacts one could make.
She watched James leave, her eyes not once leaving his back. His robes were impeccably cut and flattered his tapering hips…
She had to stop thinking like that. This was not the time.
"Evans."
She turned and was greeted by the cool smile of Narcissa Black. The two of them, before this year, never spent much time together nor did they have many similar interests. However, Narcissa's role as prefect forced them to be together far more than Lily considered palatable.
"Evening, Narcissa," Lily answered politely, only now noticing the silver-haired figure of Lucius Malfoy standing next to the other girl. "Lucius."
"Head Girl. Tsk, tsk, tsk. My how standards have fallen. Back in Father's day, it wouldn't have been possible for anyone less than Pureblood to be Head Girl," Malfoy said, his voice smooth as melted butter. "But then, ever since Dumbledore took over, things have gone to hell in the proverbial handbasket."
Lily rolled her eyes.
"Nice to see you, too." She began to move away but was stopped by a hand on her arm.
"Lily," Narcissa purred, making her name sound dirty or profane, "Lucius and I are to be married in August. See my ring?"
As Narcissa held out her hand, it was impossible not to notice the large emerald and diamond engagement ring on her left hand. It's amazing that she can hold up her hand, Lily mused, poor thing looks emaciated.
Lily gave her best congratulatory smile and moved to the side again, hoping that James would return.
"What? No congratulations? Don' t they have manners in the Muggle world?" Lucius sneered.
"You two deserve each other," she answered, knowing full well that they both understood her double meaning. "Let's just hope that your 'Lord' allows you to be happy in his little snake pit."
"Ah, Evans, you are always a ray of sunshine," came a familiar voice from behind.
Lily turned and found James back at her side with one mug of Butterbeer and a flagon of mead.
"Malfoy." James nodded at the other young man.
"Potter." The distaste between them was almost tangible. "So sorry to hear about your father. Did you and your mother get our floral arrangement?"
"Yes, we did. And it should make great compost next spring." James beamed while Lucius' mouth dropped. "Shall we?" He took Lily by the arm and lead her toward the Christmas tree.
Lily didn't know whether to laugh or to chastise James for his behaviour. She knew that he and Lucius never got along, but to see it up close and personal was really something to behold. When James handed her the Butterbeer, she accepted and drank deeply; she needed it to calm herself a bit.
"I noticed that Cissy had some new jewellery," James mentioned.
"Mmm. Seems they're to marry in August. Can we not talk about them? This is supposed to be fun," she reminded him.
"And what's more fun than this?" James leaned in and kissed her firmly. He smiled as he pulled away and before she could say anything, she noticed the sprig of mistletoe above him.
She felt her blush rise from her neck and into her cheeks before making its way to her hairline.
"Merlin, I love it when you do that," he muttered. "And I also loved it when you—Professor Dumbledore! I didn't know you were attending!"
He recovered his composure quickly, she noted, and saw an attractive shade of red starting on his own face.
"Well, as much as I abhor the concept, Horace's little soirees do afford me the chance to see old friends socially," remarked the headmaster. "Glad to see the two of you here. Together. If you don't mind my saying, it took you long enough." Now both Lily and James were reddening. "I lost twelve Sickles on you, seeing as I bet on you getting together before your seventh-year. You've made Professor Kettleburn a rich man."
She was stunned. Did the professors have nothing better to do than take wagers on the love lives of their students? Part of her wanted to lash out and demand an apology. However, there was something endearing about it, picturing the staff, the majority of them single, living vicariously through their young wards.
Lily didn't notice that James and Dumbledore had struck up a conversation.
"…and how long have you had it?" Dumbledore asked.
"Dunno," James replied, running his left hand through his hair. "It's been in the family for generations."
"Interesting symbol…the circle, triangle and wand." Dumbledore began playing with his beard, unable to take his eyes off the pin on James' cravat.
"How do you know it's a wand, sir? Nothing's ever been written down about it." He looked uncomfortable under the scrutiny of the old man.
"Ah, yes, you are correct. Perhaps it's an old man's imagination, but it is a beautiful piece, Mr. Potter. Guard it well," Dumbledore said ominously as he left the two of them standing next to the tree.
"What the bloody hell was that all about?" James asked, wide-eyed and shaking his head. "I think he's a nutter, really. A brilliant nutter, though."
"And it was all about your pin?"
She shook her head, wondering what was so special about that piece of jewellery.
"Yeah." James looked to his right and nodded at someone, whom Lily saw was a couple members of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team. "You mind? I hate these sort of things. And they were asking about how they can beat Slytherin."
His face was boyish with excitement and she noted his urgency. Even though she would have preferred to stay with him, she didn't want to have him bored out of his mind.
"That's fine. Really." His face lit up. "There're a few people I'd like to speak with anyway. I'll find you later."
Lily leaned in and kissed him quickly on the cheek then made her way to a group of Ministry employees and Wizengamot magistrates. She busied herself with the many contacts and soon, much to her dismay, found herself bored and looking for James or someone else her own age. After politely leaving the group, her eyes settled on a group of students in one corner of the room, where she knew the refreshments were located.
After a few steps, she saw James' unruly hair, which quickened her pace. With a smile, she tickled him around the waist, causing him to jump and turn around.
"Hey," he said with a chuckle, pulling her close and nuzzling her neck. "All finished canoodling with the powerful?"
"Mmm hmm," she said dreamily as his hands began rubbing her sides. "Why doesn't he have music? I wanna dance!"
"I think," he answered, his breath hot against her skin, "we can make our own music."
With wide eyes, she stared at him and giggled as he waggled his eyebrows. Merlin, she wanted to. She was wound up tight whenever they were together and the softest touch from him could spring the trap and make her throw caution to the wind.
"Go on, Sev!" came a loud, booming voice from the refreshment area. "Give it a go!"
Lily moved to the side and saw Severus, along with several of the Ravenclaws James was talking with earlier, gathered around the punch bowl. He was shoved from behind, stumbled to the table, and grabbed a glass.
"Wot's yer wish?" asked Barney Yaxley in his York accent.
She watched as Severus closed his eyes and poured himself a glass.
"Like she'd be seen dead with the likes of you, you greasy git! Wash your hair and get some sun if you ever want to get laid, Snivellus," the punch bowl shouted at him and then, to everyone's surprise, the liquid exploded all over him, drenching him in the sticky, sugary-sweet beverage down his front.
James barked out a laugh and started shaking uncontrollably; nearly everyone else in the room was laughing. Lily watched them laugh at Severus, trying to dry himself off, with the red punch dripping off his hair, leaving little red dots on his white shirt. He looked up and met her gaze, saw her standing next to James, and then took off, the laughter following him in earnest.
She turned to James again, her rage bubbling to the surface and her wand hand itching to grab it.
"You…You PROMISED to leave him alone!" she shrieked. "How COULD you?"
She spun around on her heel and stomped out of the room. She didn't care where she was going. All she knew was that she had to get away from him, had to distance herself from his juvenile behaviour. She thought he'd changed…he'd promised her that he'd stop acting like that. Hot, angry tears leaked from her eyes, ruining the makeup she'd so carefully applied earlier. The clicks of her heels along the stone floor accentuated the ranting words that flowed out of her mouth. She just about reached the landing leading to the third floor when she felt herself bound and she tumbled to the floor.
A shadowy figure stood over her.
"Let me explain." It was James. "Will you listen without harping at me? One blink for 'yes,' please."
She blinked once and he performed the counter-charm, releasing her from the invisible bonds that held her. Sitting on the floor, her anger in check, she looked up at James, waiting patiently.
He bent down and looked her in the eye.
"I put a potion in the punch. It was supposed to dare someone to make a wish and then embarrass them. It wasn't supposed to explode, I swear. I don't know what happened. Maybe Padfoot did something to it."
"SIRIUS?!? I'll kill the bastard!" She started scrambling to her feet but James held her down.
"Lily, he probably added something for that extra bit of fun. You know how he is. He dared me to do it," he explained. "Honest, Lily."
"That was pretty dumb, Potter." She huffed and crossed her arms in front of her.
"I was bored. Sorry," he said as he shrugged.
"You're going to apologize to Sev, you do know that. Right?" She eyed him carefully and smiled as he nodded.
"Lily?"
"Yes?"
"Come with me," he said as he stood up, holding out his hand. She wanted to say something, but he shook his head to quiet her. Taking his hand, she allowed him to lead her to the large, oak entry doors and outside into the cool night air. The stars were like pin pricks on a field of black velvet; it was a beautiful, cloudless night.
"I want to ask you something."
She nodded, almost too cold to speak.
"Will you come visit me during Christmas? Mum wants to meet you," he said nervously.
"She…she does?" she squeaked.
"Yeah. She wants to meet the girl I've fallen for. The girl I love."
He tipped up her chin and kissed her softly, his warm lips banishing the cold air and heating her insides. She felt herself forget everything else. She forgot that he'd embarrassed Severus. She forgot that it was freezing out there and she was only in cap sleeves. Heat emanated off him and she did all she could to return that heat with her kiss.
James pulled away and rested his forehead on hers.
"I love you, Lily Evans. I don't want to stop loving you. Ever."
He reached up and brushed away a tear she didn't know she'd shed. Her heart soared as she heard his words, his declaration of love, and joy bubbled up inside her. She had been thinking along the same lines for several weeks and she couldn't hold them in any longer.
"I love you, James."
James was tired. He never thought that Christmas shopping could be so exhausting. But then again, this wasn't any ordinary Christmas. This was the first Christmas he'd be spending with Lily and he wanted to get her something special, something that she would love and tell her how much he loved her. He'd found a bottle of some exquisite perfume that instantly reminded him of her at the first shop he'd gone to. James, however, wasn't quite satisfied; he wanted to get her something else, too. Whatever that something was, he'd know it when he saw it. Unfortunately for him, he hadn't seen it yet, and it didn't appear that he ever would.
He sighed heavily, feeling as if the world would stop spinning if he couldn't find her another present.
"James! Hey, Prongs!"
James shook the cobwebs out of his head and looked at Sirius, who was accompanying him on the shopping expedition.
"What?" He cringed at how annoyed he sounded.
"You gonna stand there all day," Sirius said with a smirk, "or are you going to come over here and see this? I called your name three times already."
"Oh, yeah. Sorry." James walked over to Sirius, who was standing next to a glass-topped display case. "What did you find?"
Sirius tapped the glass. "This. I think she'll like it."
James bent over and saw a bracelet with small stones that were shimmery and iridescent looking. That was it.
"Yes!" he whooped in excitement.
The shopkeeper walked over, but before he could say anything, James laid down the necessary Galleons, and three minutes later, he and Sirius were back on the main street of Hogsmeade. James was giddy; he whistled and if he could have done it without embarrassing himself, he would have skipped along the cobblestone.
"So you coming over on Christmas Eve?" Sirius asked casually.
James stopped mid-step.
"Er, well, I…I can't," he answered nervously. He'd forgotten to tell him that Lily would be spending part of the holiday with him and his mother.
Sirius nodded. "Oh yeah, I s'pose your mum'll want you to stay home." He shoved his hands in his pockets and kicked a small pile of snow before smiling. "I could stay over, too. Mum loves me."
"Well, see, we're already having company." James dreaded this conversation, having put it off numerous times since Lily agreed to visit.
"Yeah? Who?"
Taking a quick glance at his friend, James was surprised to see that Sirius hadn't put two and two together yet. He felt heat rise from his neck and up onto his cheeks.
"Padfoot…I wanted to tell you earlier, but…but—"
"She's going home with you, isn't she?" Sirius stated flatly, without emotion or expression.
All James could do was nod.
"Well," Sirius answered, "I should have seen it coming." He stopped and sat down on a nearby bench, wearing a dejected look on his face. "I'll find someone else to spend Christmas with, don't worry. My charm knows no bounds." He flashed a quick smile, but James knew it wasn't genuine; there was sadness behind his eyes.
"Sirius…"
"No, James. I should have figured it out. You two have been all doe-eyed lately." They both snorted at the comment. "I don't want to get in the way. True love and all. Just make sure you invite me to the wedding."
Before James could say anything, Sirius turned and Disapparated, most likely to just outside the Forbidden Forest, leaving James feeling like shit and knowing that Sirius felt even worse. Why couldn't Sirius stay with him for Christmas? he wondered.
Because you want to have sex with Lily, dumb ass.
James rolled his eyes at his thought. It was true, after all. He often pictured her in his bed at home, looking up at him with those emerald eyes as he showed her what making love was supposed to be like. He often thought of castrating Geoffrey for just…taking her like that. She didn't talk about it much with him, but what he did learn was that they literally fell into bed and just went at it. No foreplay, no soft kisses, no caresses. He felt terrible when she told him and knew that when it was time for them, he would do everything to show her how much he loved her.
For the first time, he'd actually be making love with someone and the thought made him smile. Yes, he'd had sex, but that was it. There was no real emotion involved, no connection what so ever. Teresa, whom he met on holiday with his parents, made a point of showing him what exactly a woman needed to enjoy things to the fullest. She was a patient teacher and he was a very eager student. She left his life as quietly as she had entered it that summer, saying, 'Take what you learned and save it for one you really want to share yourself with.' At the time, he couldn't have cared less if he cared for the girl. He'd had loads of sex—good sex!—and he was eager to show off his skill, so to speak. However, a conversation with his mother on the subject (she'd had too much to drink, otherwise she'd never broach the subject with him normally) changed his mind and he decided to take Teresa's advice.
And then there was Narcissa. That had been a mistake of epic proportions. He came upon her one night in the dungeons after a detention and she was bawling like a baby. Tears on a woman should be deemed evil, he decided, because he'd found he couldn't ignore her and once she stopped blubbering long enough to talk, she told him about a fight she and Malfoy had and that she wasn't sure if things would work out. Narcissa kept talking and talking, peppered with episodes of more tears, until he could stand it no more and put an arm around her. The typical scenarios followed, and the two of the had ended up on a desk in a classroom. It continued for a week with the two of them meeting at night and shagging wherever they could find a flat surface. Narcissa couldn't keep her mouth shut, of course, so everyone knew what was going on and whispers followed him down the halls between classes.
It was a Thursday morning when things ended. Lily, he remembered, was ill and in her dormitory. The post owls arrived and he took notice of a jet black owl with a large package tied to its legs flying in the direction of the Slytherin table and landing in front of Narcissa. The stark contrast between the black of the owl and the paleness of the girl was striking, much like the way the two of them were different in their appearances. She opened the package, and her eyes brightened as she lifted out a dark brown fur coat. Narcissa wrapped it around herself and looked up, locking eyes with him.
"Looks like Potter served his purpose," she'd said loud enough for everyone to hear. "Lucius took me back."
Taking the fur, she sauntered across the Great Hall with a legion of Slytherin girls following her, hoping to touch the fur with a mere fingertip. She made her way purposefully toward the Gryffindor table and stopped in front of James. Reaching into her pocket, she smiled coyly before placing something in his hand. James gaped at her and opened his hand to find twenty Galleons.
"All whores need to be paid," she said and waltzed away, her entourage surrounding her as she left.
The gold coins sailed from his hand through the air of the Great Hall, smashing a window and arousing Peeves' curiosity, which unfortunately resulted in a rhyme he took to singing whenever he saw James.
"Hogwarts' prankster has had a new gag
When Potter thought he'd found a wench he could shag.
For a week they were sore
But she called him a whore
And gave him gold Galleons to pay for the shag."
As a result of his smashing the window, James had three detentions with Professor Kettleburn, cleaning out the paddock by hand, and also had to pay for replacing the window. The last part of his punishment was utterly mental, since it was fixed with magic anyway. When he complained, he was given another detention and told that the window was a gift from his great-great-grandfather Something Something Potter and that his father had decided on the restitution. Of course, he made James pay for it out of his own pocket.
James groaned at himself, hating the fact that the memories still bothered him. He should really talk to Lily about all of that and soon, especially since they'd talked about having sex over Christmas. Things needed to be said and he needed her to know that it wasn't a joke with him, that he was serious about making love to her and that he loved her with his whole heart. James huffed again and placed the box with the bracelet in an inside pocket and began making his way back to the castle.
He had just passed through the gates when a blur of red came running towards him and knocked him to the snow-covered ground. James managed to catch his breath and then smiled up at Lily, who sat straddled across his chest.
"There you are! I was worried about you!" she said, her cheeks red with cold and anxiety. "When I saw Sirius and you weren't with him, I got scared."
The worry in her voice caused his heart to melt. Sitting up, he held her to him and kissed her behind her ear, a place that never ceased to cause her to shiver.
"I'm fine," he reassured her between kisses. "Sirius and I…well, we had a misunderstanding of sorts." She gave him a quizzical look. "We'll work it out, don't worry."
"You sure?" Lily ran her hands through his hair and then began playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. "What happened?"
The trouble with having someone like Lily as a girlfriend was that she could always figure out what was bothering him. Whether she was just very good at deciphering his looks or if she was an Empath, he wasn't sure. It was just very hard to keep a secret from her.
"He's upset about Christmas. He wanted to spend the holidays with me." James looked away to avoid her asking for more details. It didn't work.
She placed a hand on his cheek and turned him to face her.
"James, do you think we should change our plans?"
"NO!" That was the last thing he wanted. "Mum wants to meet you and she's thrilled to finally have the chance." The urgent sound of his voice surprised them both.
Lily nodded. "You're right. He needs to let go. Sometimes I think he's too dependent on you."
All he could do was nod. She was right, of course. Sirius had always needed him more than Remus or Peter; they talked more, they confided in each other about everything. Part of it, naturally, had to do with the fact that Sirius had moved in with James' family after being kicked out by his parents. They felt more like brothers than friends.
"Speaking of Christmas, did you find anything for my mum? You said you were having a rough go of it," he asked, hoping that a change of subject would steer her away from delving into his problems with Sirius.
Her face brightened as she smiled. "Yes! My mum found an antique book of garden prints in a book shop. You said she loves her flower garden so I thought she might like it."
"Definitely, Lil. She can sit around for hours reading seed catalogues or looking at magazines." James smiled at his recollection of his mother's hobby. "She'll love it. And she'll love you," he whispered before leaning in and kissing her softly on the lips. "I love you, Evans. More than I thought I could."
Lily kissed him this time, her wicked tongue dipping into his mouth. Before he could deepen the kiss, she pulled away from him.
"I love you, too. If someone would have told me in fifth year that I'd fall in love with you, I would have sent them to Bedlam." They both chuckled. "Why did it take us so long to get here?"
James placed a hand on her cheek, enjoying the warmth of her skin in contrast to the chilly air around them.
"I had to grow up and you had to see it, Lils," he pointed out, his eyes not leaving hers. "We had to get to this point together. I think it was worth the wait."
"Me, too."
They stood up from their spot on the ground, neither of them caring that they had wet bottoms. With hands entwined, they silently walked back to the castle.
James had never been nervous about going home for the Christmas holiday until today. On more than one occasion, Lily, Sirius, or Remus had to tell him to stop bouncing his leg or to stop humming. His companions were getting frustrated with him, he could tell, and with a look at his leg, James halted his nervous action.
"What?" he barked.
"It's just your mother, Prongs. Mum Potter isn't anything to get your knickers in a twist over," Sirius pointed out. "If anyone has a right to be nervous, it's Evans over there."
"Oh thanks, Sirius. That makes me feel loads better." James laid his head on the back of the chair and began counting ceiling tiles.
"Well, it's true. A Muggle-born witch going to meet the Pureblood mother of her boyfriend, whom she hopes to shag—that's got to be nerve-wracking," Sirius teased, looking at Lily.
"Great, now I'm nervous," Lily huffed. "Can't you put a muzzle on him, James?" He couldn't decide if she was teasing or serious.
"We tried that, Lily," answered Remus. "But he just transforms back and then there's no shutting him up." With a smile, he looked over at James, who'd given up on counting ceiling tiles. "Never thought you'd be nervous to see your own mother."
"Well, I am. First time I ever brought a girl over."
"Really?" Lily asked with surprise causing him to turn to her and meet her gaze.
"It's true." He held out his hand and she walked over to his chair and sat down on his lap. Sirius made a gagging sound and Remus wolf-whistled. James gave his friends pointed looks and then turned his attention back to Lily. "I never wanted her to meet anyone. I guess I just never let them get too close." He rested his forehead on hers.
"No one could measure up is what he's trying to say, Evans," Sirius quipped. "And now that he's got you, well…Oh look, we're here."
Once the train came to a complete stop and most of the students had disembarked, James and Lily made a final sweep of the train for any stragglers before stepping off the train and onto the platform.
He felt Lily grab his hand and squeeze it tightly as he looked along the platform for his mother. She didn't usually come to the station, but she told him she would; this was a special occasion, after all. Their trunks were already on the platform and not too far from them stood his mother and her great-nephew, Robert Abbott.
His mother looked tired. The last couple months had been hard on her. The letters she had written him were sad and her handwriting appeared shaky and weak. James noticed that she'd lost some weight, her face was thinner, and the robes she wore just hung on her. Her hair, which still had some of her natural dark brown when his father died, was completely white now. She'd aged twenty years in two months.
She looked up and saw them, smiling brightly and holding out her arms to him. James prayed that she wouldn't call him Jimmy-Jam in front of Lily.
"Jim—James," she said, correcting herself when she saw the look on his face.
He wrapped his arms around her and could feel how thin she'd gotten.
"Hey, Mum," James said, giving her a little squeeze, mindful of her thinner frame. "Mum, this is Lily."
He stepped aside and she stepped forward and was immediately engulfed in his mother's arms. The joyful strength of his ancient mother was amazing, but James reckoned she was doing it for him; she never did like to see him worried about her.
"It's so nice to meet you, Mrs. Potter. James has told me so much about you," Lily said, smiling, her arm around the old woman's shoulder. James could tell that his mother liked her.
"Thora. Please, call me Thora. James, would you help Robert with the trunks? He brought his car." She put her arm through Lily's and began walking.
He watched his mother and Lily walk ahead of them, arms linked and chatting away.
"How is she, Robert? Really?" James asked, turning to his cousin.
"Well," he began, "she has to be reminded to eat. Wilbie makes so much food and cries whenever she doesn't eat. She also has stopped going to her card club. Says that all they want to talk about is Cornelius."
Robert and his wife, Helen, had stayed with his mother once James returned to school. They'd just got married shortly before his father died and hadn't found a place to live. He and his mother had always been close and they'd decided it would give her some companionship until James returned for Christmas.
"Damn." He ran a hand through his hair. "Is she snappy? She gets that way when she's upset."
"Sometimes. She yelled at Helen the other day, swearing and everything." Robert levitated the trunks and began walking towards the barrier.
"Mum swore?" His mother didn't swear. His father, on the other hand, could swear like a sailor and spit tacks when he was mad. James jogged ahead to catch up with Robert.
"Yeah," he answered casually. "I don't even think she realised she did it. We didn't make a big deal about it so we wouldn't upset her more."
"But she's not taking care of herself, Rob. She's thin, her hair's gray and she's weak."
"James, she's ninety-two. She lost her husband two months ago and they were married for thirty-seven years. She misses him," Robert reminded him. "Now come on before Thora tries to start the car herself."
Lily's eyes fluttered open, and for a moment, she forgot where she was. Then, with a huge smile, she remembered that she was at James' house and it was Christmas morning, her favourite holiday. At the foot of the bed, she noticed a small wrapped box; she reached for it but waited to open it since James wanted to open presents with her. She turned to the right and looked at the sumptuous room. It was lovely, almost as if it had been decorated especially for her.
The bed she lay on was large with a light purple duvet and eyelet trim. It was a bit girly, but it suited the room, which was painted in a very light violet wash and white trim. A white dresser and wardrobe stood opposite the bed. On her left was a pair of large windows with eyelet curtains and sashes that matched the duvet. A rocking chair was placed in front of the window and a floral print pad was placed on the seat. It was a cheery room and very inviting.
The night that she'd arrived, when James and Wilbie first showed her to the room, she had asked him why it was so feminine.
"When Mum was pregnant with me, she decorated one room for a girl and one for a boy. They didn't know if they'd have any more kids after me, so they just left it," James had explained. "Sirius' room is down the hall across from mine, and Robert and Helen are living on the second floor. Mum and Dad's room…er, Mum's room is downstairs."
He had shown her where the bathroom was, along with the cupboard with clean towels before leading her into his room and it was…very James. A collection of Quidditch posters lined the wall behind his bed, which was the same size as hers but dressed in a plaid duvet. A very large window with a seat was on the opposite wall of the door, making her blush at the memory of some of the things they'd done in window seats. The room also had a desk, two large, overstuffed chairs, and an antique wardrobe. The walls were painted an off-white but were nearly covered with more posters, several of which were of Muggle girls in bikinis and some in even less.
"Oh, er,...sorry about those," he nodded, indicating the posters of scantily clad females.
"Farrah Fawcett. How typical," she said with a smirk.
"Sirius has one, too," he answered while Lily rolled her eyes. "Mum doesn't come up here much anymore."
"So," she began, walking over to him and grabbing his collar, their faces a breath apart, "your bed or mine." The question shocked him and taking advantage of his silence, she pushed him backwards onto the bed and leapt onto him before he could argue.
"Lily…the door's open!"
"You yourself said that she doesn't come up here very often," she pointed out, grinding her hips against his.
He closed his eyes, groaned, and pushed her off him. Looking down at her, he held her gaze.
"I have plans," he told her, emphasising the last word. "Now be nice and go downstairs with me. Mum had Wilbie cook up a big feast." He slid off the bed, causing her to stare at how smoothly he moved, almost like a cat.
A knock at the door startled her out of her thoughts, and she scrambled out of her bed and padded across the thick area rug to the door and answered it. She smiled brightly when she saw James' unruly hair and opened the door wide.
"Happy Christmas, love," he said softly, still wearing his pyjama bottoms and nothing else.
Her eyes roamed over his skin, taking in each part of him. There was more chest hair than she expected but it only made him look sexier, if that was at all possible. The muscles of his stomach were well-defined and she reckoned that he did some work with weights during Quidditch season, as riding a broom didn't necessarily build muscle. His arms, oh his arms, were her favourite part of him. They were lean but muscled, and the veins stood out magnificently. His biceps just begged to be flexed. How could someone look so sexy in the morning?
The bed dipped as he sat down and she felt his breath on her neck. On instinct, her head tilted to the side, giving him more skin to kiss. Her breathing quickened, making her desire begin to build.
"I…I thought we were opening presents?" she reminded him, causing him to groan in frustration and bang his head against the headboard.
"Damn!" He rubbed the spot on his head but smiled cheekily at her, telling her it didn't hurt that bad. "Serves me right for coming in here completely unprepared for how delectable you look." His eyes roamed over her, causing heat to gather between her legs.
Delectable? Her? Lily shook her head. Her hair was a mess, she wore a Petunia-worthy nightdress, and she was sure that her breath was strong enough to clean the bottom of a well-used cauldron.
"You, my love, are insane. And blind," she teased, a finger absently trailing down the soft hair between his nipples and down to his belly button.
"I guess you hadn't noticed that the top three buttons came loose as you slept." His hand slipped inside and cupped her exposed breast, bringing the nipple to a rock-hard peak.
Her initial shock at being exposed was quickly replaced by an overwhelming desire to strip it off and forget about any plans he had for them. She wanted him NOW.
As if he sensed her growing ardour, James removed his hand and slowly buttoned the ones that had come loose.
"You'll have to wait to open that particular present," he purred as he licked the inside of her ear. "But you can open this one."
James sat up and retrieved the small box from where she'd dropped it on the bed.
"Do you have yours?" she asked nervously. She hoped he liked it.
"Right here." He held up the box. "Ladies first."
She smiled briefly and went to work carefully removing the ribbon before gently peeling away the cellotape.
"For Merlin's sake, Lily, it's a present. Rip the damn stuff, " he said with a laugh and reaching for the package which she quickly pulled away from him.
"James, this is our first Christmas together and I want to put the paper in my scrapbook."
"Never would have thought you were the sentimental type. It's mental, but charming." He flashed her a brilliant smile and leaned forward to kiss her on the nose.
Lily turned her attention back to the wrapping paper until she was left with a small black box bearing the mark of a jeweller in Hogsmeade. Nervously, she lifted to top and gasped. Lying inside the black satin-lined box was a bracelet. Gold and crystal beads reflected the early morning light while pieces of mother of pearl added elegance. It was remarkable.
"It's beautiful," she said breathily, looking up at him, tears starting to brim in her eyes. "Put it on me?"
She watched as he took the bracelet from the box and fumbled with the clasp. After a few awkward moments, the jewellery was around her wrist, and the soft brushing of his flesh against hers made her shiver.
"Thank you. I love it."
"And I love you, Lily." James sighed. "I never thought I'd actually say those words to anyone. You're amazing, Evans." He kissed her then with soft, teasing kisses that held the promise of something more.
"Your turn," she reminded him as she pulled away from him.
He smiled brightly at her, reminding him of a little boy, ready to tear into what Father Christmas brought him. Her observation wasn't far off as paper and ribbons went flying onto the floor. The top of the box was tossed onto the bed and then…silence.
Lily bit her bottom lip and looked at him, trying to decipher his reaction. He stared at the bottom of the box, mouth open.
"Do…do you like it?" she asked nervously, pulling at the lace on her nightdress.
"You drew this?" She nodded. "Lily, this is absolutely fantastic. When did you start on this?" He continued to stare at the pencil drawing at the bottom of the box.
"After I saw you transform the first time," she answered. "I couldn't get the image of you out of my head. I just had to sketch it out."
That day in November, James had taken her out to the Forbidden Forest under his Invisibility Cloak to a secluded area that he and the marauders used as a gathering place. Once there, he transformed into his Animagus form and she was rendered breathless. She'd seen deer up close before but never a stag. He was magnificent. Prongs walked toward her and nuzzled her neck, making her put an arm around him. His fur was soft and short. When she reached up to touch his antlers, he bent forward. They weren't as rough as she'd expected, but somewhat smooth, like a tree branch with the bark stripped off and sanded down. It was an experience she'd never forget.
"Thank you. I'm…wow. I didn't know you could do this. You're just full of surprises, aren't you?" His voice was still full of astonishment. James leaned forward and kissed her like he did before, teasing her with little nips of his teeth and soft touches along her neck and up into her hair.
The creaked open and Wilbie popped in her head.
"Master James! This…this is the girl's room! Out! Out! You must get out!" The house-elf ran to the bed and tried to shoo James out, pulling on his arm in an attempt to make him leave. "Wilbie musn't let you be in a girl's room!"
Lily burst out laughing as the little elf struggled to pull the nearly six-foot James off the bed.
"Wilbie—let me GO!" He shook the elf off him and Wilbie grabbed Lily's hairbrush and immediately began whacking herself on the head while Lily watched with wide eyes.
"Wha—what's she doing?"
James hopped off the bed and grabbed the brush, the force of his pull sending Wilbie onto the floor wailing.
"Wilbie, stop it!" James shouted, making her stop as she reached for one of Lily's shoes. "Please, don't punish yourself."
"But…but—" Wilbie began crying.
James looked at Lily, his eyes asking for help.
"Wilbie, Wilbie, look at me." The bulging, watery eyes of the house-elf turned toward Lily. "James wasn't doing anything. We gave each other Christmas presents. That's all."
James nodded enthusiastically. "Why are you so concerned about this anyway?"
"House-elves is required to keep a girl's virtue until she marries, and Miss Lily is not married. That is why Wilbie must keep Master James out of her room!" She resumed pulling on him. "Master Sirius broke the rules and now he has no house-elf. Miss Lily needs Wilbie!"
James finally allowed her to pull him toward the door. "Is that why he stopped bringing girls over here?" he asked as Wilbie closed the door behind them.
After breakfast, Lily, James, and Mrs. Potter gathered in the sitting room. Their Christmas tree was large with several glittery glass balls hanging from the boughs and thousands of multi-coloured fairy lights casting a festive glow about the room.
"James, would you pour me some tea, please?" Mrs. Potter asked, setting herself into her usual armchair.
"Mum, Wilbie hasn't brought the tray in yet. She'll be out in minute," he reminded her, pulling Lily onto the sofa next to him.
The older woman looked around the room and, upon finding the sideboard empty, she huffed and pulled a blanket onto her lap, which made James frown. He walked over to the tree and pulled out a couple of presents before going over to her and sitting at her feet like a child wanting desperately to please his mother.
"Mum, you've got some presents here. This one's from me and Sirius," James said, placing the package in her lap.
"Oh, Jimmy-Jam, you don't have to do that for me," she cooed.
Lily stifled the laugh that was building up as she heard James' nickname. He turned around and mouthed 'Don't you dare laugh.' She made a mental note to tease him about it later.
Mrs. Potter set about unwrapping the present, in the same way Lily did, carefully and slowly. Once the paper was on the floor, she lifted the cover and gasped. A tear escaped her eye.
"James…it's…oh sweetheart." Tears flowed freely as James raised himself up and gathered his mother into his arms. The box slid to the floor, and Lily saw what it was that made the woman cry.
Laying in the box was a small portrait of James' father of him in his younger days. Although he was blonde, he and James looked very much alike from the hazel eyes to the out of control hair. They even had the same smile. Lily had to swallow a sob of her own.
Mother and son separated, and James handed his mother the present from Lily. She watched nervously as the old woman looked up and smiled at her.
"You gave this to me?" she asked and Lily nodded. "What a sweet girl. Who is she, Jimmy-Jam?"
James stared at his mother and then gave Lily a confused look. Turning back to his mother, he said, "Mum, it's Lily, remember? My girlfriend. You invited her for the holidays." His voice was gentle and soothing.
"Oh," she said simply as she nodded. Somehow, Lily knew the woman didn't remember.
Mrs. Potter unwrapped the package and smiled as she uncovered the book that Lily and her mother had searched for and finally found in an antique shop.
"Oh, how lovely. I love gardening. Did Wilbie show you my flower garden?" she asked Lily.
"Er…well, no, Mrs. Potter. It's Christmas," Lily reminded her.
James sat back on his haunches, his face a mixture of sadness and worry. She wanted to reach out to him, comfort him, and kiss his worries away.
"Oh, that's right. Corny loved Christmas," she mused. "He loved spoiling me with baubles and jewellery that he knew I'd never wear. I've a whole cupboard full of necklaces, pins, and broaches. You can have them some day, dear."
It was amazing, the change that suddenly washed over Mrs. Potter's face. It seemed that merely talking about her husband brought her back to the present. Even though she barely knew the woman, Lily felt an extreme sense of loss at knowing that James' mother would never be the same without her husband.
"Thank you, ma'am," Lily responded shakily, not knowing if his mother's statement was really meant for her.
"James?" Lily asked him later that afternoon as they were talking a walk in the park, enjoying the fluffy snow. He turned to her and grabbed her hands.
"What is it?" He smiled crookedly at her as he tucked her hair behind an ear.
"Is your mum okay?"
His smile faded quickly and she could literally see his usual swagger leave him. Silently, James led her to a bench and sat her down before joining her. He took a deep breath and looked her in the eye.
"No, she's not." His voice wavered. "I talked to Robert and Helen last night after dinner, remember?" She did. "They told me she'd been having these episodes lately, you know, forgetting who was around and stuff like that. She had an appointment with her Healer and they said…they…Lily, she's losing her mind. And she argues…she fights. She was yelling at me last night after you went to bed."
Lily remembered. She'd heard the woman screech at her son, ranting about her schedule at the hospital and then about him trying to correct her. Mrs. Potter didn't settle down until Wilbie stepped in and calmed her mistress down.
"Wilbie sat me down and told me what was going on. Mum has to be fed when she's in those moods. Helen and Wilbie have to get her dressed. Robert has to go with her because he's never sure if Mum'll find her way home. She can't Apparate anymore because she might splinch herself. She gets confused if she's left alone for too long." James brushed the hair away from his eyes, closing them to compose himself. "Robert and Helen are moving out in February, and I'm scared that she'll just waste away all alone, Lil. I can't let that happen."
"But she was…at the station. She seemed so, I don't know….."
"Normal?"
"Yeah."
"Robert said she'd been talking about me coming home all week. That she kept reminding him to take her the station. She was looking forward to me coming home. She wouldn't forget that. I'm the only thing keeping her in the present." His bottom lip quivered and she couldn't help noticing that he was beginning to cry.
"James, whatever you're thinking, you can't quit school to take care of your mother." He opened his mouth to argue with her but she silenced him with a finger on his lips. "Aren't there, I don't know, homes for elderly witches and wizards once they can't live alone? Muggles have nur—retirement homes."
He nodded. "Rob—Robert said there are arrangements made. She and Dad had it set up years ago. But Lily, she would hate it." James turned and wiped his face with the sleeve of his cloak.
"But you have to take care of her, to make the decisions she can't anymore." Despite her best efforts, she found herself beginning to weep along with him.
"I'm only eighteen! How am I supposed to make these decisions?"
"I don't know."
She knew it was a completely useless answer, but that's all she could say. Lily pulled him into her arms and let him cry, mumble, and let out whatever emotions were bottled up inside him. She would never talk about this to anyone else, she had decided; this was something to be kept between the two of them.
When James was able to compose himself, they began to make their way back toward his home. Intermingled with periods of silence were times of animated conversation with topics ranging from Quidditch to pranks to classes to sex. The simple act of holding his hand made Lily feel secure and loved, filled with more happiness than she thought possible.
Without noticing, they'd arrived at James' house. At the front door, a crash sounded from inside and James Apparated away from her. She stood at the door, fiddling with her hands, unsure of what to do. James had told her that he needed to Side-Along them inside the house, and she was effectively locked outside of the house. Sitting on the steps, all she could do was wait.
"…bloody useless thing!"
"Mum! Stop it!"
"Keep your opinions to yourself, you ungrateful brat!"
The shouts continued to permeate their way through the heavy door and Lily could only imagine what was going on inside the house. As her thoughts got the best of her, tears began to flow freely and sobs began to wrack her body. She remembered the way Severus' parents used to fight and how the two friends would run away to the river. Once away from the shouting, Sev would toss rock after rock into the water, swearing creatively and impressively for an adolescent.
But what about when you fought with your own parent? How can you escape that? Fear began creeping up and she began to panic. What if they hurt each other? What if something happened to both of them and she couldn't get in?
An idea struck her. She'd heard of people communicating with a Patronus, sending messages that spoke in the voice of the sender. Thinking of the first time James told her that he loved her, Lily shouted, "Expecto Patronum!"
A cantering unicorn materialised before her and she said, "Go to Sirius Black and Robert Abbott. Tell them to come to the Potters. It's an emergency! GO!"
The unicorn galloped away, splitting into two images before disappearing into the sky.
Before she could blink, Sirius and Robert appeared before her, wearing identical worried looks on their faces. Without waiting for an explanation, Sirius grabbed her and the two of them Disapparated, reappearing in the sitting room, which was now a complete mess.
Lying on the floor in a heap was Wilbie's lifeless body. Mrs. Potter, Lily reckoned, had thrown the house-elf against the wall, causing her death. On the sofa lay Mrs. Potter, breathing heavily with James on the floor, holding her hand, muttering soothing words. Sirius, still holding onto her, squeezed Lily tightly, obviously shaken by the scene in front of him involving his best friend and his surrogate mother.
Robert walked over to James and knelt on the floor next to him.
"James, look at me." James raised his head. "It's time. She can't stay alone anymore."
James merely nodded and watched Robert go to the fireplace and make a Floo call. He looked over at Sirius and Lily. His face was tear-stained and she noticed a welt on his cheek. His mother hit him? That sweet, sweet lady hit her own son? What was going on?
He slowly got up off the floor and shuffled towards them, collapsing onto them as soon as he was near enough. Lily wrapped her arms around him and kissed his cheeks, crying along with both young men. Sirius, the ever-jovial bloke, was at a loss and sobbed as well, reminiscent of the scene she'd witnessed in the corridor outside the library when James' father died.
"Lily…I'm sorry…but I think…I think you should go home," James said between sobs, making her heart sink at his words.
"I want to help you. I want to help your mum. Please, let me help," she pleaded.
"Lily, he's right," came Sirius' deep voice. "I know you love him, but I don't think he can do this if you're here. Please."
He was right, she realised. James needed to get his mother settled wherever it was that she and her husband had picked out. She'd wait and give him the space he needed. She hated the thought of him going through this alone, but as she packed her things, Lily knew that James and Sirius were right, even though she didn't agree with them. She could be stubborn about the situation and go along anyway, but she'd only be in the way.
Once she'd gathered her things and made her way downstairs, three other men in dark cloaks were standing with Robert, James, and Sirius, apparently talking about the plans for Mrs. Potter. James turned, saw her, and smiled weakly.
"Lily, I'm sor—"
"No, there's nothing to apologise for. Really," she whispered, falling into James' warm embrace. "Let me know what's going on."
"Of course. But—my plans for us…I'm sorry."
She couldn't help but giggle. His mother was being taken to some sort of nursing home, and he was apologising for ruining their plans to have sex. Sometimes, she really couldn't understand men.
"Soon." She smiled. "I'll hold you to it." Lily gave James one last, lingering kiss on the lips before stepping away. "I love you, James." She caressed his cheek and moved toward the door, hugging Robert and Sirius before Disapparating to her parents' home.
She looked at the cheery decorations on the house, noting the stark contrast between it and the scene she'd left behind. Taking a deep breath, she decided to hug her parents tightly and tell them how much she loved them.
Life was too short.