I owe everyone who was actually following and enjoying this story an enormous apology. I hate when authors leave a perfectly good story alone for a long-ass time with no explanation, and now I've gone and done just that. I could give you that explanation now, if you'd like, along with a story about how that time I spent abroad changed my priorities, my way of thinking, and my life in general. But it'd end up being just a bunch of excuses. It's been a rough two years, but I miss writing, and we were in the homestretch of this story. I can't promise the updates will be regular, or up to the quality of my old writing, or even really the same style as my old writing, but at least they'll be coming.
And to everyone who bothered to keep checking if this story was updated, and got a smile on their face when it was… thanks =)
Disclaimer- Were it mine, I'd be rich. But I'm poor, so clearly it's not.
The scare in basement of Honeydukes had no effect that Harry could see on Sirius, which made sense because he couldn't remember it. It also had no apparent impact on Peter, who had also lost his ability to recollect that particular chain of events. Between the obliviating and storytelling, in fact, he and Professor Dumbledore had done an excellent job of ensuring that there was no apparent reaction at all, and thus that time would continue in the way that it was meant to.
There was one thing that they couldn't cover up or erase though, because both Harry and Dumbledore agreed it was entirely too dangerous to meddle with: Harry's own memory. According to Dumbledore, it was even possible that this was utterly essential to keeping the future he was familiar with the way that he remembered, especially if it motivated him to do something.
And Harry, unlike Sirius and Peter, couldn't help reacting.
He'd been vacillating, for quite a while, on how to go back and how soon he needed to go back. Although he had recently become quite determined to research all of his possible options for how to return, the attack lit a fire under Harry that hadn't been there previously as he was reminded of all of the attacks taking place back in his own time.
It had only barely occurred to him, in the back of his mind, that spending time with people that were truthfully already dead (even if they didn't know it yet) instead of spending time with people that were still living was unhealthy, but he now began to ask questions of himself that he'd previously been too afraid to consider. What if he finally made it back to his own time to discover that those he thought were living had died in the meantime? What if, by spending all the time he had with his parent's friends, he'd sentenced his own friends to their deaths?
Unfortunately, being so lost in his own thoughts made Harry a little less aware than he usually was, and the Marauders were beginning to really notice it, and worry.
"I don't think he's turned the page in the book at all in the last hour," Remus said quietly, glancing across the room from where he and James were playing a loud game of exploding snap to look at Harry. James turned and frowned at his green-eyed doppelganger briefly, catching the overwhelmed look on the boy's face, before he turned back to his cards.
"Do you want to go ask him about it then?" James muttered low enough that Harry wouldn't overhear. He looked pretty preoccupied with whatever was mulling over, but Harry had proven before that he had an incredibly sharp set of ears.
"I've already tried, he just brushed me off and said he was tired. And Sirius doesn't think it's anything to worry over—he's stressed out with NEWTs too, so he thinks it makes sense."
"It could be the NEWTs," James agreed, privately hoping Remus would let the topic go and get back to the game. Conversations about emotions just weren't really within his comfort zone.
"Well, I don't know what he'd be reading about time transit for if he's worried about his exam scores," Lily said from behind them, making both boys jump a little. Tossing her bag down beside the table, she leaned forward to give James a brief kiss and then settled down next to him. "And whatever it is he's working on, he's not going to talk about it. I've already tried."
"When did you decide there was something wrong going on with him?" James asked, awed as always at how Lily always caught onto everything so quickly.
"About a week ago," Lily replied, digging through her bag to pull out a long and well-used piece of parchment. "But I've been working on the list of things unusual for a little while now."
Remus stretched his hand out to take the parchment and examine Lily's findings, and James used the opportunity to trace patterns on Lily's knee under the table, still delighted that he was able to do so. Lily eyed him with amusement but didn't say anything to argue with it as Remus mouthed what he was reading to himself and then looked back up at Lily with admiration. "Is this how you figured my secret out?"
"Sort of," Lily admitted, shrugging. "When I'm trying to solve a puzzle, I get all the pieces together first. I was going to just leave Harry's secret alone, but if it's going to make him so upset and overwhelmed then I'm not sure it's such a good idea."
James reached out his hand for the parchment to pursue Lily's list himself, and found he was even more impressed by all of the little bits and pieces that his girlfriend had collected. Titles of books, behaviors and quirks Harry occasionally exhibited, and phrases or words he had said that were unusual or flat-out bizarre had been carefully and neatly written together for her to pursue.
"He'd probably be pretty upset if he found this though," James told her, hoping that the impressed whistle he'd let out a moment before had said enough of a 'good job' message that she wouldn't get snippy at his advice. She nodded, already obviously aware of this, and carefully wiped the parchment clean in a way that made James raise his eyebrows. Letters and words began to disappear, and within moments the entire thing was blank.
"Do you think you could teach me to do that?" James asked somewhat wistfully, imagining how much better the Maurader's Map would be if it could be disguised as a piece of parchment afterwards.
Lily hesitated, then shrugged to herself and continued onward. If James chose to use the charm for pranks instead of fulfilling his duties as Head Boy, then that was on his hands as far as she was concerned. She could teach the charm at least and not be responsible for what he did with it. "I could probably show it to Remus, but honestly James, I'm not sure you're advanced enough with Charms for it yet."
"All the better," James replied, raising both eyebrows at Remus significantly to indicate that his friend should do so. In all of his interest in the charm he'd failed to pay attention to his cards, and his next turn was careless enough to trigger the explosion that made most of the people around the small study table jump in surprise.
As he stood up and stretched, James noticed that his girlfriend was already pulling out the notes she had on the charm to show to Remus, and he decided to stretch and distract Harry from whatever he was thinking so hard on so that Lily and Remus could focus. Kissing Lily on the crown of her head as he passed, he meandered through the common room towards Harry.
He expected Harry to at least be somewhat aware that he was behind the chair, but the other boy seemed completely clueless, his eyes on the book situated in his lap. Curious, especially after seeing Lily's list, James glanced over at the words and found himself completely lost.
"Do you even know what any of this means?" He asked, unintentionally startling Harry into slamming the book shut. James smirked a little bit as Harry sighed, eyed the closed text hopelessly, and shook his head.
"Not even in the slightest," Harry admitted, turning to look at James while attempting to put on a happy expression. "What're Remus and Lily working on over there?" He asked, hoping to divert the subject of the conversation to one that James would be okay knowing.
James frowned a little bit, clearly seeing through his distraction, but played along willingly enough. "Lily found a charm that makes text disappear at a certain wand movement, and then reappear. It's like invisible ink, but you can use any sort of writing utensil with it, I think, because the charm's on the spell instead. I'm hoping she can teach it to Remus so he can do it on the Map."
"But we really only have about a month left when we'd use the Map, right?" Harry asked, with a slight feeling of unease that he didn't fully understand. "I mean, what's the point when we're just about to graduate?"
"You never know—one of us could be back here someday teaching, using it to catch troublemakers after curfew," James replied in a joking tone, laughing to indicate just how likely he found this possibility. Harry forced himself to laugh along, the unease slowly sliding from a small to a rather larger place inside his stomach.
"That seems like an awful waste of all that hard work," Harry murmured speculatively, following the bad feeling to figure out where it was going and how he could fix it. "I mean, to keep it in a trunk just in case someday you feel like using it."
James shrugged. "Well, it's not like it'll be much use to us when we're out of school anyways. And besides, what else would we do with it?"
"I don't know, I just feel like taking it away from Hogwarts is depriving future rule breakers of their ability to wreak havoc like you guys have," Harry answered thoughtfully, trying not to tip his hand too much.
Sirius saw the two of them thinking as he came through the portrait hole a moment later and headed over to them, flopping into a squishy armchair near Harry's and stretching out his legs to rest his feet on the low-set table in front of the fire. "What're we thinking about?"
"Our ability to inspire trouble makers of the future," James answered seriously, causing both of his friends to look up at him with a little surprise. "What?" He asked defensively when he noticed their expressions. "It's an important topic. I never thought about it before, but Hogwarts is going to be completely boring for the first years after us if there's no one here to take up the torch."
"Huh?" Sirius inquired, as eloquently as possible.
"I was just saying that you guys pulled off some amazing pranks while you were here, from all the stories I've heard," Harry explained, gesturing to Remus and Lily over in the corner, who appeared to still be discussing the charm that had sparked the discussion. "And Lily's showing Remus a charm now, and it's going to make the Map even more useful than before."
"Which charm?" Sirius asked, always excited about the idea of improving their pranks.
As James explained the charm, Harry did some fast thinking. He remembered Fred and George saying they'd nicked the Map from Filch's office, but until then had not considered how the map had ended up there in the first place, and of all the stories that the Marauders he'd known in his own time had told him, the fate of the Map was not one of them.
How much might it alter things, Harry wondered, if one of the Marauders kept the Map instead of losing it? It seemed like a rather small thing at first, but in the scheme of things, Harry thought back on his third year and the specific events that had led him to the Shrieking Shack at the end of it and realized that had the map not followed it's own path, there was a very good chance that he would not have had the opportunity to get to know his godfather at all. Considering he had gone back in time (though when he'd stepped through the veil, that truly wasn't his intention) to rescue his godfather, ensuring that the Map followed the proper path seemed pretty important.
He couldn't see James, however, or even Sirius now that he knew him so well, being careless enough to lose the Map to the old caretaker. That sinking feeling that Harry had been experiencing in the pit of his stomach sunk as he realized the Marauders might not have been the ones to lose the Map to the caretaker, because he might have to do it himself.