Sorry I haven't updated in so long… I had lots going on… Christmas, New Year's, going back to school, to name a few… not to mention the fact that Basketball has taken over my life. I know, I know, 'excuses, excuses.' So for all of you who know that those were just excuses and not the real reason for updating… the real reason for updating none of my stories is… writer's block. Like, the worst case of writer's block I have had in my life. So, sorry. But I finally got a bit of motivation for this story in my Computer class the third day back at school from Christmas Break. So would you please read and review?
Hiei looked at Kurama, then at Moriko, then back at Kurama again. The look on his face was one of complete and utter shock and disbelief. After several minutes of this, he turned his eyes upon Moriko and said, "You kept them close merely because they were my children, for no other reason?"
"Yes. My love for you never once wavered, Hiei. Sometimes I wished it would, that I might not hurt so much because of my hurting you. But it was never more than a wish; my heart never acted on it."
When Hiei didn't say anything for several minutes, she continued, "Everyday I regretted doing what I did. Every single day. And, just so you know, if you decide you want to leave me, because you fear being hurt by me again, I would not blame you. But it will have to be you who leaves, because I will never make that mistake again. I would kill myself before I left you again."
When Hiei still refused to respond, she said, awkwardly, "Well, I guess I'll go now…" And she turned to leave, to go outside.
"I kept your letters."
Moriko turned around. "What?"
"I kept your letters. The letters you wrote to me, years ago. I still have them. Or I did until these two took them." Hiei jerked his head toward Kurama and Yusuke. Kurama snorted, not the least bit surprised that Hiei had worked out that the entire thing had been set up based on the letters that had been in his room.
"You did?"
"Yes. Probably because I am a masochist. I read those letters repeatedly; they brought comfort with the pain. It helped to remember what we once had… but I always knew what was coming and it hurt more than you can imagine… but I read them anyways… I miss you more than I have ever missed anyone. So just come to me as soon as you can. When are you coming back? I love you too! I miss you more than I can say, and love you dearly. I love you. More than I probably should. Love you so much. I would love to keep writing, but I really need to sleep. Good luck finding Yukina. I think it would be fun to introduce you to my brother. See what he would do. Probably kill us both, but whatever. At least we would be together at the end. I hate it. I hate him. I hate this realm. I hate my life. I hate his friend, whom I have never even met. I love you." Here Hiei paused in his quoting for a moment before saying in a whisper, "It is very hard to write this, but I must. He will be staying with me, Hiei. I love him. I am so very sorry. I understand your feelings for me, but I can no longer honestly return them. So, farewell, Hiei, and may your life bring you happiness."
"Are you quoting the letters I wrote to you?"
Hiei grinned slightly, "Perhaps. I've read those so many times. I could recite them all word for word if you wanted me too. But I have just one question… why did you think that I would want to leave you?"
"You were always… naturally inclined to self-preservation; I mean, we all are, but you more so than most. If you felt threatened or somebody hurt you once, they did not get a second chance. It was over; either you killed them or they never saw you again. And I felt certain that I was doomed to the latter."
"I see…"
"That is why I never tried to find you, Hiei. I knew your were skillful when it came to hiding your aura, and the like. If you had really wanted to hide, you would not have been found. It would have been like you disappeared off the face of the earth. Which would have very well been true, as you could have been in another realm altogether, but you get my point. The only way I would be able to see you again and tell you how sorry I was, was if you came back to me."
"I almost did, several times. But then I thought I might see the demon you left me for. And if I did that, I would surely kill him. And killing the one I thought you loved would make me hurt you. And I loved you so much, your pain would have been my pain as well."
After saying these words, Hiei fell silent again, staring at the floor with an intensity that surprised Yusuke and Kurama. Then, suddenly, the tattoos on his arm began to glow, brighter and brighter as if he was losing his temper and his subconscious desperately wanted to let loose the Black Dragon. Thankfully, however, that isn't what happened. Instead, he turned around so quickly that only Yusuke's eyes could follow his progress, and his fist collided with Kurama's jaw.