Ghosts of the Past
Andreas watched as Sebastian sparred with Briar. He, Dragon and Lorelei were having a brief rest from their own exercises. Sebastian's eyes were twinkling as he circled his soon to be wife.
"What shall we wager?" The younger prince asked the dark haired girl. "If I win what will you give me?"
Briar shook her head at him. "It must be your relation to Selena that you always wish to bet on our sparring sessions." She teased. "What would you have of me?" Sebastian's expression grew positively wicked and Briar spoke before he could open his mouth and mortify her. "Don't say it aloud!" She commanded her pale skin turning pink at the tips of her ears and over her high cheekbones.
"Very well my beloved Rose." Sebastian drawled. "I will not name my prize." He gave her a look that nearly caused the warrior bard to lose her blade. "But should you triumph over me, what will you have?"
Briar smiled. "A picnic." She told him and then laughed at how his face fell. "Just a picnic with you in the gardens, when the moon is full."
Sebastian grinned. "Done." He tugged at one of her braids. "Now we begin in earnest."
Andreas fought to keep his face from drawing into a scowl. His easy grin grew set and his usually bright hazel eyes dull with the effort.
Jealously swept over him like a tidal wave whenever he saw his brother and Briar together. Fury that he was denied his hearts desire engulfed him. Andreas wondered at times if he was losing his reason. But no. All he wanted was what Sebastian had, a love, and surety in his chosen path. It seemed neither of those was to be.
His beloved maid by the sea was lost to him. Daily he doubted his ability to rule Cormyr as an effective king, let alone a great one. His own paltry interests in history and strategic warfare paled in comparison to his father's achievements and Sebastian's talents. And unlike his father, he had never been tried without being found wanting somehow.
"Andreas." His twin's low voice jerked him from his thoughts. He stared at her and wondered why out of all his siblings was he the one left without the gifts the gods had given them.
As her twin regarded her, Lorelei sighed. "You know, when I was sixteen, I made a mistake and got hurt." She said softly. "And you were the only one in our family whom I told about it." She touched his cheek and her amber eyes darkened as his muscles tensed beneath her fingers. "Daddy told me, how you made sure I was the only one who remembered what happened. You had my complete trust and you still do." Her fingers slid off his skin sadly. "Thank you for doing that."
Andreas nodded without saying a word. They had both been sixteen, right before he'd been sent to The Western Heart. Before… "You are welcome." He finally replied.
Clapping from Dragon drew them both to look at the two combatants. It was apparently a near thing but Sebastian had won. As they watched Sebastian drew Briar into a hug and whispered something that made her blush again.
"If you'll excuse me." Andreas said quietly, the anger rising in him again, though he hoped the others didn't see. "I have duties." He turned and without waiting for a reply walked quickly from the room.
Dragon took Lorelei's hand and brought it to his lips. "Worry not my siren." He said in his low rasp. "He will confide in you sooner or later."
"But he hasn't, not really, not for a long time now." Lorelei whispered. The pain of her twin's self imposed isolation was like a constant ache in her chest. And Andreas didn't seem to see or care that he was hurting her and himself. It was as if he had built a wall around himself and could not see out or allow anyone in.
Dragon frowned slightly as Asrai entered the room with Faith, Andreas on their heels. The youngest member of the Obarskyr clan was strangely distracted these days and the Crown Prince while carrying out all of his duties with his usual charm and aptitude was coolly detached from everyone.
A tall auburn haired lady moved to take Andreas' arm and the prince smiled warmly at her. The watching warrior's lips curved upward slightly. At least there was one person still close to the king's older son.
As he watched the foursome make their way closer to the dais where the royal family sat Dragon saw Faith's mouth firm slightly and her brow furrow. Then the expression was gone with a wry smile and a glance at Asrai.
Faith caught herself before her frown slipped into a full-blown scowl. She truly disliked Court but it had become necessary that she attend. Asrai was of age and it was part of her duties as a princess royal to attend Court. Faith reminded herself that she couldn't go wrong by keeping her own opinions to herself. And she just might hear something that would be of interest to the boss.
She looked around wondering where Sebastian was. There was something niggling in the back of her brain that she wanted to have his opinion on. But she couldn't remember what it was, not even going over the day backward, event by event helped her recall what it was. A glance at Asrai reminded her that it had something to do with the princess but what? Her dark gaze was nearly black as she thought she'd better just tell the boss that there was something wrong and get help to sort it out. Even as she had the thought, a ghostly strain of music sounded in her ears and she relaxed. The music took away Faith's worries completely and all that mattered was that Asrai was happy and her rehearsals were going well and there was no danger for her.
Finally she spotted Sebastian, standing with Briar near the doorway. He looked a little distracted. But then he would be, with all he was trying to accomplish these days and keep most of it secret.
Sebastian smiled as he looked down at Briar. "Thanks to your aid, I managed to complete this morns lesson." He told her in a quiet voice. Ever mindful of the ears around them he lifted her hand in his own and kissed it.
"I am glad my prince." Briar shivered as his mouth touched her skin. "You have much to do these days. I am happy to help." She murmured. Making their way through the elaborately dressed throng the couple came to a halt near Andreas and Maggie. "Andreas." Briar murmured. "I trust you are well?" Her smile was slightly tentative as she recalled the crown prince's rather abrupt exit from the practice session that day.
"Perfectly well." Andreas gallantly took her hand and saluted the back of it with a kiss. Sebastian greeted Maggie in the same way, with an affectionate smile for the lady whom Andreas called friend. The crown prince nodded towards Maggie. "A little time spent in Maggie's company always better enables me to continue my duties."
Briar smiled at the beautiful red head. "Your Lady is very wise then, as well as lovely." She said in a low voice. "Maggie it is always good to see you." Her words were sincere.
Sebastian grinned at his brother, his lazily merry courtier's persona seeming extremely appropriate to Andreas at the moment. "We are both fortunate in our companions tonight." He drawled. "Thanks to Briar my morning's endeavor was not completely without progress, and Maggie seems to keep you in a sunnier mood with all you must do these days."
Andreas scarcely heard the reply that emerged from his lips through the roaring in his ears. How he loathed the court and Sebastian's seemingly undisputed ruling of the insipid courtiers. Hazel eyes flickered with unreadable emotion as distaste swept through him. He knew that when he and his brother stood together and spoke that it was himself who was perceived to be the younger and lesser of the two brothers. A bit shorter and with none of his family's golden looks he must be like a slight dark shadow of his brother's sun filled visage. He hated the comparison between the two of them just as much as he hated being found lacking.
And now it seemed that as usual Sebastian would succeed at this newest requirement for the post he wished to take up. Magic must come as easily as everything else to the young prince. It seemed nothing came easily to Andreas. Every accomplishment, pale or ignored as it was, was a struggle to achieve.
Sebastian regarded his brother with carefully masked concern at the sudden darkening of Andreas' eyes. "Yes, with the smile of Selena I won't make a complete fool of myself." He said slowly. "My pace is slow, however and it is very frustrating at times."
"I have no doubt that you will succeed." Andreas said with a slight edge to his voice. "You always do." He slanted a glance at Briar and changed the subject. "You and my twin have been together constantly these days. How go your plans?"
The lady bard groaned slightly and made a face. "Had I known the time and work involved, I think I would have begged Sebastian to carry me off." A wryly twisted grin spread her lips. "The wedding progresses slowly but well."
"Perhaps it will do Sebastian some good, to wait for what he wants." Andreas' jab wasn't entirely friendly and even he seemed to hear something amiss in his words for he smiled a bit more brightly as he looked at his younger brother. "I know he believes the wait to be worthwhile. With you as his bride, it could not be otherwise." He gave a gentle tug on Maggie's arm. "Shall we go pay our respects to my parents, my dear?" He inquired.
Asrai woke and shivered. Sometimes she felt so cold when she woke up, even curled beneath the quilts with Faith beside her in the bed. Echoes of music stirred in her ears and she sat up throwing the covers back.
Faith regarded her with a sardonic resigned gaze from where she lay on her stomach next to the princess. "Going somewhere babe?" She drawled carelessly.
"The theatre." Asrai nodded pulling her hair back with a ribbon.
Faith sat up with casual disregard for her nudity and pushed her own dark locks out of her eyes. "I guess it can't wait until morning can it." She said with a roll of her eyes. The music tugged at her but it seemed fainter, less compelling then it had at the theatre.
"Faith, the angel sings me to sleep, he comes to me in dreams. He calls to me, he speaks my name. Sometimes I don't know if I'm awake or asleep when I hear him." Asrai told her. "I just know I have to go to him. It's as if part of him is within me, pulling me towards the rest of him." She shivered again as she pulled on a pair of cannons and the Watcher frowned.
"Babe, I don't know if I like how that sounds." She said slowly. With her typical lazy grace she rolled out of the bed and slid an arm around Asrai's waist. "But if you feel like some action, I can provide you with something to do." She kissed the other girls neck and shoulder with a smile, noting how even distracted as she was Asrai reacted. "Or if you want to be more specific, I can give you someone to do." Her hand slipped down the front of Asrai's cannons and cupped her mound.
The golden haired princess moaned softly. "He calls me Faith." She whispered. "He is the angel of music. I must go to him."
Faith gently turned her around and kissed Asrai's lush pink mouth. "Babe, it's the middle of the night. If he's your angel of music, he'll want your voice rested. We can both go see him in the morning. You'll be fresh and ready to sing for him." Her other hand pulled the ribbon from Asrai's hair. "Come to bed baby, I'll make sure you are able to sleep."
Asrai moaned, as helpless against the sensations Faith roused in her as she was against the angel's voice. "All right." She agreed. "Yes." Violet eyes drifted closed with desire as she returned Faith's kiss.
Faith steered her back to the bed and smiled in genuine pleasure as Asrai turned and pulled Faith down with her, straddling the dark eyed girl. "Oh, and what are you doing?" Faith's smile grew to a grin.
Asrai giggled. "Making sure that you will be tired too." She told her friend as she began trailing kisses down to Faith's thighs.
"Hmm…" Faith caught her breath. "Babe, you're getting too wicked." She observed with a gasp of pleasure.
"You're the one who taught me." Asrai lifted her head to speak, her violet eyes sparkling.
"Well you gotta practice I guess." Faith agreed, a moan escaping between her words. "But you're mine afterwards." She tried to growl the words out but lost her threatening tone along with another gasp of need.
"Always." Asrai smiled against Faith's thighs and stroked her hand over the soft skin. "I count on it." She gave herself over to the delightful task of making love with Faith.
Sebastian sat studying the tome Seltac had insisted would aid him in his studies. So far it seemed like naught but gibberish to the prince. Foreign to his nature as it was, he was truly growing frustrated with this business of learning magic. Every step Seltac insisted was basic, Sebastian found to be a struggle, no matter how simple the mage insisted it was. Sometimes he felt he could understand if the mage could just explain it another way, but no matter how he and Seltac tried, he failed to comprehend what his tutor was saying.
Now he sat in his bed, with Briar's sleeping form beside him, the lamp on the bedside table lit just enough for sight, in a futile attempt to study what Seltac had said was a simple explanation of magic. If he had to be awake he would much rather be making love to his betrothed than studying, he thought wryly.
As he stared down at the pages he found his mind wandering, and remembering another large book. This one was huge in his childhood hands and filled with writing in careful slanting script. There were beautiful pictures in it as well as miniature tapestries that were wonderful to touch. It was not yet complete for there were blank pages after the last tapestry.
It was carefully bound with a beautiful woven cover of deep blue over ebony and he remembered one of the softest voices saying gently. "Be very careful with that please Sebastian. It is a gift for Uther when he returns."
He had looked up then at the lady and solemnly nodded his compliance. Placing the tome on a table he went to lean on the arm of the couch where the lady sat.
She held a small child in her lap, a little girl with black hair and huge silver blue eyes. Sebastian remembered looking at the little girl and then up at the lady. The lady had black hair too. It fell over her shoulder in a long braid. The child in her lap was holding the end of it against her cheek. The eyes of the lady were also silver-blue, the little girl's a copy of hers. But the lady's eyes seemed darker and shadowed somehow.
Sebastian had looked from the child to the lady again and then at his mother who held another child in her lap. This one was a little boy with chocolate brown eyes and black hair.
This trio had visited them often, once a month for a day at least, for as long as Sebastian could remember. This particular visit had been made memorable by the fact that the lady whose name was Sylvan, had let him hold the little girl.
Sebastian had carefully climbed up on the couch beside the lady and the child had immediately squirmed around so she could keep looking at him. He smiled to himself. He could remember his fascination with the two of them, they and the little boy. The lady had smiled down at him and the girl had pointed a tiny finger and him and said in a quizzical voice. "Who?"
"That is your cousin Sebastian." Her mother had answered with another sad smile.
"'Bastian." The little girl had repeated and Sebastian had grinned at her. "'Talia." She announced and then stretched out both arms to him.
Sebastian had looked up at the lady hopefully and she had glanced at his mother to be certain it was all right. "Sebastian you must stay on the couch if you want to hold Natalia." His mother had said sternly and he'd nodded.
"Yes, Momma, I'll stay right here."
Natalia had giggled when she was set in his six year old lap and her tiny hands had reached for his hair. "Curls!" She pronounced. She had grabbed a handful and pulled. For a three year old she had quite a grip. Trying to be a gentleman like his momma had taught him Sebastian hadn't pushed her away but simply exclaimed. "Ouch!"
"Natalia you're hurting him." Her mother had softly reprimanded her and then gently untangled the little hands from his hair. The baby had pouted up at him hopefully but subsided after a moment. Curiously she kept staring up at him and then bestowed upon him an adorable grin. "Like." She said firmly and looked at her brother.
The little boy instantly began wiggling and Sabine had been hard pressed to keep him in her lap. Sylvan had frowned in confusion and then understanding dawned. "He wants to sit with his twin." She said with a wry smile. "Sebastian is it all right if William sits with you as well?"
Sebastian remembered grinning up at the beautiful sad lady and nodding. He'd ended the afternoon by falling asleep on the couch, his arms carefully holding the already sleeping twins so they didn't fall off his lap.
"Sebastian?" A voice from the present pulled him out of the memory and he looked up to see Briar regarding him with sleepy curiosity.
"I'm sorry love, did I wake you with the lamp?" He asked penitently.
Briar sat up in the bed and absently shook her head. "What are you doing?" She looked at the book he held.
"I was attempting to study this…this…gibberish but I was woolgathering really." Sebastian admitted.
"Gibberish?" She frowned curiously and turned the book so she could read the pages. After a moment she shook her head. "That makes no sense to me. 'The science of magic'." She intoned the first few words. "Magic is not science, the Weave is part of the natural world."
"I begin to believe you were correct when you said I have enough elven blood that I have trouble learning from a completely human perspective." Sebastian said with a sigh. "Your brother is busy learning what will be required of the new archmage and I am loathe to bother him but short of informing Raden that he must find me a half elven tutor for me, I don't see any other way."
His betrothed smiled. "Dragon probably would find teaching you relaxing." She suggested. "Ask him, the worst that could happen is he will say no." She grinned as he made a comical face at her. "What were you woolgathering love?"
Sebastian set the book on the bedside table and turned the lamp down even further. Gentle but strong hands slid along Briar's body and drew her into his arms, as he bestowed a tender kiss upon her lips. Briar regarded him with a smile. "What brought that on?"
"I was reminding myself to never take you for granted." The prince smiled down at her though his eyes were solemn along with his joy. "I was remembering my cousins would come to visit us once a month with their mother." He traced the elegant line of her jaw and reveled in the silky soft feel of her skin. "My cousins are twins, Natalia and William, only a year or so older than Asrai." He explained. "Their father, my uncle Uther, disappeared before they were born."
"How sad." Briar whispered as she looked up at him.
Sebastian nodded. "It would have been worse if not for their mother." He told her. "She raised the twins to love their father, had my aunt Brynheld sketch them and wrote a journal of their lives. She showed the twins pictures of their father and even created magical tapestries to hold memories for my uncle." Sebastian stroked his betrothed's hair and cuddled her closer. "She did everything she could to teach her children about their father and believe he would return. The journal, pictures and tapestries were for my uncle, so he would have something of their childhood." He kissed her forehead. "I can't conceive of how difficult it was for her." He said. "I was very young still when my uncle returned, but the change in her eyes was amazing enough that even I could see it."
Briar regarded him curiously. "She still loved him then?"
Sebastian nodded. "I asked her once, when I was older, why she'd lived as though he would return. No one knew for certain he would, and it would have been less painful for her to give up on that belief." His eyes were far away. "And I'll never forget what she told me."
"What?" Briar whispered her query.
"She said that if she stopped loving him, and gave up hope, then she wouldn't be who she was anymore. And if she was not the girl that Uther had loved, then how could she be a good mother to his children? She would be cold and dead inside because her hope and love and innocence would be gone. How would her children know the love of a mother if she was like that? The pain of the years without him were hard, but worse would be to hurt he and the twins like that, just to make her own path easier. It would be like punishing them, because she had been hurt."
Briar took a deep breath. "She is a very strong woman."
Sebastian nodded. "And very wise. What I learned from her, I want to make sure you remember as well my Rose." She looked up at him quizzically. "The thought of something happening to you terrifies me." He said softly. "But I know I would go on, my duties and my family would force me to do so. But if something happens to me, if I am killed, I want you to do the same. I want you to keep living."
"I don't want to talk about this." Briar whispered, shaking her head in refusal. "Nothing's going to happen to you…"
Sebastian gripped her shoulders gently and made her look him in the eye. "My beautiful loving Rose, you can't ignore my profession." He reproached her. "I need you to promise me that you won't let my death make you cold and dead inside. Don't let it close off your warm, loving heart. Remember me, but don't let my memory anchor you to the past. Promise me?"
Briar buried her face in his shoulder and he could feel hot tears on his skin. "The thought of it is so painful I can't imagine what losing you would be like." She wept. "I will try, that is all I can promise. I will try."
"That is all I can ask then." Sebastian whispered. "Hush now my Rose, my Briar, don't cry. I'm here, and whole and well."
Briar raised her face and met his gaze. Still trembling she pulled his head down to hers and kissed him passionately. Sebastian groaned in his throat and deepened the embrace, each of them reminding the other that they were both still alive.
TBC