Well, I've got another one for you guys. Time after time these ideas hit me late at night XD. This one kept me up a bit last night, so I hope you guys like it.

Summary: Late one night, Luke and Thalia decide to get drunk and Luke makes a less-than-pure resolution about Thalia. I'll let you decide how old they are.

Warnings: Underaged drinking, swears, and boob-related situations.

She hiccups beside him and gives this damn goofy grin that's so fucking funny to him for some reason. He laughs like a hyena and it's contagious. Soon they're both howling to the moon with no idea what they're laughing at. He tries to cut himself off and takes a swig of vodka, diluted by tangy cool aid. Hers has coke in it and they keep switching back and forth as their arms play musical chairs over the glasses.

It wasn't his idea…well it was, but she sure as Hades was on board. Shit, she was the one who procured the cheep liqueur from the store while he provided a distraction (by knocking over an entire rack of glass bottles and then dipping out with the shop keeper hot on his heals, yelling his fool head off. He didn't even notice her slipping out with a bottle under her jacket.) He's really a bad influence on her, he thinks with a cheeky grin.

They're under a bridge just on the outskirts of town. It may be foolish to be getting drunk given all the monsters lately but hey, ambrosia works well for clearing your system. They've both got a square in arms reach and he's not going to let a bunch of monsters keep him from a night of indulgence.

He's gotten drunk before and he can tell the same is true for Thalia. His mother kept a meager stash but she never was really good at keeping track of it. She was so oblivious that she'd replenish her stores without even realizing her son was absolutely wasted in the other room. Really kind of a sad thought and he doesn't want to be sad right now so he drops it.

Instead he focuses on Thalia. Thalia's nice. He likes Thalia. A lot. He denies it during the day but he's tired of it and he wonders for a moment if he should try to kiss her. Would she let him? Or would she slap him? He peers at her not-so-subtly and notes how ridiculously inebriated she is…maybe he could get away with more than just kissing? He wonders how she'd react if he tried to touch her breasts. He's a boob guy. Boob guy, hehe. Boobies. That's a pleasant thought.

But she'd probably hit him. Actually she'd definitely hit him. Hammered or not she wouldn't be that loose, would she? Thalia has nice boobs he thinks. Or at least they look nice anyway. Perky he thinks is the word he's looking for. And that shirt's driving him nuts, the way it seems to make her sizable (for her age) chest pop. While he doesn't necessarily dig the whole lace-and-skulls thing at first, he won't lie she makes it down right sexy. Should he risk it? Was it worth the risk? Is he seriously thinking of taking advantage of her in this state? Yes. Yes he is. Consequences be damned he resolves by the end of the night he'll touch her boobs.

"This is great. Everything is great. You're great, Luke." Thalia drawls, reaching out to...hug him?(dear gods, how plastered is she?) but failing miserably and getting a face full of dirt. She chuckles stupidly.

"We should do this more often. You're so laid back right now and funny." He answers blatantly. He doubts they've ever talked as frankly as they are right now.

She beams at him. "I am, amn't I?" She rolls over on the ground, making a very un-Thalia-like "woohoo" like she's having the time of her life rolling around in the dirt. But there's more than dirt down here. Nasty things happen beneath bridges after all and he's pretty sure when she sits up there's a used condom caught in her hair for a moment before she shakes her head and it flies off in some unspecified direction.

Used condoms. Hmm that's just asking for his mind to go down a very very dirty direction involving lots of N rated situations. Well, Luke's discovered something new about himself tonight. He's a horny/funny drunk with a touch of melancholy here and there. And Thalia? She's a funny/chatty drunk with a dose of god-knows-what-else.

She's still smiling in his general direction although her eyes are a little glazed and…smoldering. Wait, is she even possibly thinking half as nasty as he is right now? Because that excites him.

He's wondered before and often what she thinks of him. When they finally stopped hating each other…well all of the sudden he found she was actually pretty cool. Even though she seemed to like a little too much to beat him up. Which is a problem tonight. Damn, he's getting cold feet about his mission. He just knows that if she remembers tomorrow what happens tonight he'll be lucky to get away with anything less than a concussion and a significantly reduced sperm count from the ball she'll probably kick to death in retaliation. He likes his balls to stay intact, thank you very much.

But yet her chest is so inviting…decisions, decisions. He weighs his options as she continues to yammer about something or another. He's in a deadlock when he hears it. A low guttural growl that makes his hair stand on end. A hellhound interrupts his thoughts and both of them instantly snack on their ambrosia cubes. A burning shoots through Luke as his head clears and they're both on the move.

It doesn't take much to dispatch the hellhound. Thalia gets hit once by a swipe of that thing's great paw; her arm's cut open pretty deep but she insists after they've dispatched the beast it'll be okay to just bandage it. Less than a minute later and the hellhound's bleeding from it's great neck and melting back into the shadows as its essence returns to Tartarus.

It's a total mood kill and Luke doesn't have an excuse now to act lewd, yet he's disappointed about not being able to achieve his goal. Man, he has a one track mind tonight. He's busy washing out her wound with a splash of alcohol and sewing it shut with a needle and nylon thread and yet all he can think of is her boobs.

She's not in the mood to get herself drunk again, she declares. She just wants to sleep; she's worn out and this was a bad idea, she keeps reiterating. He gets the sense that she blames him but she's not saying anything.

She gives him first watch, which suits him fine. He's not tired yet. She can sleep off her wound. It's a couple hours into his watch (and admittedly more than a few sips of liquor) that a "brilliant" idea occurs to him. He determined while he was drunk that he wasn't above taking advantage of drunk Thalia, what about sleeping Thalia? He just has to be more careful and quiet.

It's a slow tentative hand that reaches out to touch her. They're as good as he thought they'd be; he has to restrain himself from getting…ahem overzealous. He doesn't want to wake her up. She's a moderate sleeper and won't startle awake easy, but that doesn't mean she's a rock.

But morning light brings two revelations that ensure he'll probably never drink again. One: they can eat all the ambrosia they want and "burn off" the alcohol, but they're still going to be heaving out their guts in the morning. Two: Thalia was less asleep than he'd hoped. He's going to be feeling the repercussions of his drunken mistake for say…the rest of his life? Yeah, pretty much sums it up. He expects to be singing soprano for at least a month.

Although, if she knew he was doing it…then why didn't she stop him?

Poor guy. You know, all these stories and oneshots and over half of them involve some serious Luke abuse. Maybe I'm unconsciously punishing him or maybe it's just fucking hilarious. Who can say?

Well, next time I actually do have a legitimate story idea that occurred to me last night. And Annabeth's going to be around for that one. Expect mentions of porno videos(nothing explicit) and extreme awkwardness as Luke and Thalia sit Annabeth down to give her something equivalent to "the talk" after the incident. Yeah, Annabeth's going to be mortified when she finds out what I have planned for her...*evil grin*

Annabeth: Meep?

Until next time,

~Crisi