Doubt
Random Beginning Notes: I don't think that hurt/comfort and family/friends doesn't deserve to be a genre. Those are freaking themes! Gah! And this is also the chapter with the awesome dream sequence. After reading it, you'll probably figure out why this chapter's my favorite so far. Mukuro's full name sounds weird when said together. She's one of those people that's hard to make a last name fit with. I just thought Reeve and Reever were the awesomest last names ever.
Chapter 16 Th_Drugist
"Zamyatin, Minamino." Mukuro beckoned for them to enter her office. "I haven't actually assigned you anything in a while since you've gotten tied in with Yusuke's stuff lately. Actually, that's not much of a problem. Maybe Spirit World'll get off our backs if we show that we're more than willing to support the Spirit Detective. I also think you would want a change of pace every so often."
"Just give us the mission already. Quit dancing around the topic. I swear you'd spend a couple of hours just to answer a yes or no question," Hiei grumbled.
Apparently she decided not to even acknowledge his statement. "Oh, and before I go on, I won't be here for a week next month. Kirin'll be taking care of you guys assuming that a certain someone doesn't decide to mysteriously disappear."
"...I wouldn't want to be home when you're like that."
Again, refusal to acknowledge his statement. "He won't put you on any hard cases, Minamino. If he does at all. He likes to make sure I don't miss anything... In addition to his dislike for having to be in a position of power. He's a man that prefers to sit back and watch the flowers grow, even if he looks intimidating." She shrugged.
"Right. Just save him from worrying about you 'cause for all he knows, it's just a magical week long illness conveniently around the week of Christmas that you also conveniently get at the same time every year, yet you fail to never get sick again for the rest of the year."
"Christmas has become a really shallow holiday. And you'd agree. Even if you are half German." Which she took to be a truth because he didn't argue with her.
The door opened. At that moment, Mukuro rushed to stand in front of the desk and snapped straight to attention and saluted the visitor. Hiei nudged Kurama to do the same. After a second, he hissed, "Present arms!"
"What?" Kurama tried not to move his lips or look at him.
"Just salute, idiot!"
"Mukuro Reeve, I'm come to inform you that March the sixteenth to the twenty-third you are to report to San Francisco for the semi-annual meeting of the Special Crimes Unit of the United States. You are to make the appropriate arrangements with regards to your role in this station. The address will be sent to you email within the next three days. Do attend," the woman said.
"Ma'am, yes, ma'am."
"And do behave yourself as well. And that goes for you, too," She jerked her head towards Hiei. They answered again in unison though Kurama faltered a bit. The woman glanced at Kurama, her expression not changing. "Each and every one of you. Good day to you all." Once she left, the three all loosened up, and Mukuro took a seat again.
"Well, that was a moment's inconvenience. I really hate having to answer them. I feel like I'm in a cult or something," Mukuro growled.
In a perfect imitation of the woman, Hiei said, "'Do behave yourself.' What nerve. Like we're a bunch of children that can't sit still for five seconds. I didn't even do anything in this world and they're telling me that. If they decided they had jurisdiction on the other world, they'd probably charge me with war crimes while they're at it."
"Yeah, but don't forget that you also joined on your own."
"But sooner or later..."
"I know, I know. All of us are children though. They think just because they've been on this longer that they can talk to us like we're a pile of, well, horse crap on a plate shoved in their faces. Actually, if it were Youda they sent this time, you'd really have fun. The guy just never liked me. Ever since he first laid eyes on me. I'm not sure if it's his opinion or someone else's though. And he also hates communists so all the more reason for you to love him. I think he also hates French people, too, now that I think about it... Actually that would explain a lot." The phone rang and she grumbled something in what sounded like French. She indicated that she wouldn't be long as she answered it. "Hello?"
"Hey, we haven't talked in a while."
Her blood froze. She tried to keep her voice steady. "Who is this?"
"If only I knew where you were. I only have this phone number though. I miss you... What was your name again?"
She attempted to swallow a lump in her throat, hands beginning to shake. The phone began to slide out of her hand. Hiei caught it and answered,"Who is this? You're that fool that keeps calling, aren't you? Keep this up and I'll track you down and..."
"I'd like to SEE you TRY." He hung up.
Hiei grumbled a curse in his native tongue. "I took care of it for you. We need that phone, too. You need to quit breaking them."
"Y-yeah, I know... God..." Her eye was spasming.
"You feeling okay?" Kurama asked.
"Yeah... It's just... another migraine."
"You should take a medication like that. Getting them this often isn't good for you." He stood up. "I'll get you some water." She shook her head and indicated for him to sit.
"I don't trust prescriptions or OTC drugs with anything. I don't even take Tylenol or Advil if I'm having a bad enough one. I just need some coffee and I'll be okay." She rubbed a finger on her temple. She shut her eyes and opened them. "Now your case, before we were so rudely interrupted twice... I just want you to take down this drug dealer. It sounds more like what you signed up for, doesn't it Minimino?"
"If that's it, then what's the point of having US do it?" Hiei asked, cocking a brow.
"I honestly don't know. It has something to do with out of body experiences or something like that. The dealer's probably a demon, and that's probably why it ended up in my box. I have the address on this paper. Ah, that white's burning my eyes." She thrust it out to Kurama, refusing to look at it again. "You can take your time on this one. I don't care. It'll be hard to do in a few days."
"You should go home and rest if you can't even look at that without causing yourself more pain," Hiei said, beginning to feel uneasy. Hell, I've seen her sit through worse stuff than that, and she didn't even bat an eye. Actually, she had the nerve to laugh like it was the funniest thing in the world once. This isn't... Oh, what am I saying? She's just so damn weird.
"Your sympathy's starting to confuse me, Zamyatin. And I thought my problems didn't matter to you."
Hiei shrugged, and he and his partner walked out. "And take a medication? Don't be a fool, Minamino. You know it's not just a migraine that's bothering her."
"Yeah, but sounding like we fell for it... That's about all she'll let us do for her," Kurama replied. "You can't hand pills to someone who has no mouth to swallow them."
-.-.-
"Here we are. 5480 East Harding way. And it's in a foreclosed home. Well, that's clever," Kurama said, eying the paper in his hand.
"Looks like it's been abandoned for years," Hiei added.
"It takes a few days. Let's just go in." He turned the knob. "They locked it. Not surprising."
"No, Minamino, they'd leave the door open so anyone could just prance in and say, 'Hey we're going to arrest you for drug dealing!' 'Oh, I'll stop right away, my good sir, I'm so bad but I'll reform myself right now!'" Hiei body slammed the door, but it didn't budge. He cursed and grumbled, "It's cooler when Mukuro does it."
"...You want me to do it? Since you don't weigh as much..."
"Why does everybody say that?"
"...Because it's true." Kurama managed to break it within three tries. They walked into the house cautiously. The walls were covered with peeling wallpaper, revealing crackling wood. The windows were broken so there was glass scattered around the room. All in all, it appeared as though no one had been in the house recently. They paused, listening for any movement. There was none. They split up and began to search the rooms. They reconvened in the main hall again.
"They must've left. Try and find any evidence that we could use or anything that could tell us of any possibility of them returning. If we don't, we might not be able to continue..."
"They're dealers. They can't be that stupid to leave something like that around."
"What, you know from experience?" Jokingly.
"Hey, that's not funny, my company was forced to get high on meth before going to battle." Awkward silence. Kurama loosened his tie, feeling a bit uneasy as Hiei opened a drawer full of pens and scraps of crumbled receipts and post-its. "I don't know, but this person appears to really like Jack in the Box. How they can eat there everyday... I don't know why he can't cook himself."
"So nothing can compare to Mukuro's cooking?"
"Would you shut up? ...And she is a pretty good cook, I'll give her that."
"Hey, did the file say what this drug was supposed to be? Do you take it as a pill, smoke it, inject it...? I didn't get a chance to really look in to it before we left."
Hiei opened another drawer and reached in as he looked up at Kurama. "Let's see what I remember... 'Beware as you search the perimeter of the building because this drug is...'" He felt something in the drawer prick his palm. He quickly withdrew his hand and saw blood smeared on his palm. He pulled the whole drawer out and turned it over, revealing its contents- needles and some which still contained amounts of the drug. "They're needles, and these have the crap in it still so they're bound to check back in.
"Your hand... Tell me you didn't."
"We need to get the search finished as fast as possible before I start acting out. I don't know what this drug could do to me."
"Didn't Mukuro ever tell you not to rush into a crime scene and cram your hands into stuff like you just did?"
"Mukuro says lots of things, you think I actually think about half the stuff she says?!"
"You should. She used to be your partner, and you live with her, too."
"And I'm not home half the time anyway so it doesn't matter. Let's just..." His speech began to slow and slur. The room started to shift around. His body started to feel heavy. "...get out of here..."
"Yeah, we should... You're starting to bleed all over the place."
"Are you listening to yourself...? I just got pricked... I can't bleed that much... Isn't the vein on the other side of the hand...? No, there's capillaries and vessels too... Would you shut..." The voices were getting louder. The room was spinning faster. "Shut up, shit!" He started to ramble on in Russian.
Kurama sniffed the air, suddenly catching on to something. He looked at Hiei and quickly walked towards the pantry, intending to make the quickest inspection before getting Hiei out of the house. It smells like something dead. And there's a sweet smell like... Formaldehyde. Or... It's also got a smell like bleach or mothballs. I can't describe it.
Kurama walked to the pantry and saw blood on the doorknob. He tapped on the door to make sure whether it was still open, which it was. He pushed it open further and saw someone with their body torn open. In their mouth was their heart, stomach, and liver and the rest of their organs were dropped on the ground in front of his feet, squished as though someone had been stepping on them. What's that? Something tucked under his arm...
He took the broom and lifted the man's arm. It was a box. With the handle of the broom, he flipped the lid to see if there was anything of importance in the box. As soon as he lifted the lid, gas began to spray out. It was the strange mixture of sweet and chemicals. He reached out and slammed it shut as quickly as possible. What... What the hell was that? Oh, I feel a little light headed... I don't like this. Hiei gasped twice. When Kurama stepped backwards to see what he was doing, he saw Hiei's eyes rolled back in his head. Not good. I need to get him home. I'll call Mukuro, and then I'll get out of here. That gas... I'm really not liking this at all.
When he got back in the car, he saw in the rear-view mirror the silver haired man was looking back at him where his reflection was supposed to be. He plucked a hair from his head. Still black. But still...
-.-.-
"Hey, you're Heinrich's boy, aren't you?" the German asked him. He never remembered Hiei's name. Apparently the name Vladien Lvov was too foreign, too reminiscent of communism, too un-German to be worthy of his memory. Hiei returned the favor, only remembering the man as annoying Nazi number four thousand four hundred fifty-three. And the man already knew the answer. Reason one, Hiei looked like as many people remarked, "a carbon copy of Reichsenfuher Heinrich Reinhard," and reason two, the damn guy asked him practically everything he saw him and slapped him on the back as he laughed at his answer like it was the greatest joke in the world. (Hell, maybe it was. The great interpreter slept with a communist woman and got her pregnant with a son- a son who became a general, no less.) "Hey, you're coming with us to dinner. We have a special seat just for you, First Sergeant."
There's always a seat for me. He thought, And I'm not a first sergeant, you stupid bastard. The only reason you're doing this is because I'm the son of the puppet master's assistant. If it weren't for him, you would never want to come near a dirty communist like me. I would have just been another brick in the wall. "Yes, sir, I would be honored." And so he put on a fake smile.
"Come here, then..." He turned around and pushed the large doors open. He lead Hiei to his seat. He was seated between two Nazis. He looked up and down the table which seemed to be a mile long and saw all the men looked the same, were doing the exact same thing at the same time like some never ending mirror. And there were their wives sitting over a basket laying one egg after another. They cracked them open, revealing a hidden prize with ranged from a gun to a chicken to a slice of bread. They attempted to bring them to their husband's attentions who only ignored them. At one end was the fuhrer's wife, Eva Braun, sitting and looking completely brain dead.
"And now the fuhrer and the man who's graced us with his presence for the first time, Premier Josef Stalin!" That was the minister of Foreign Affairs, Adolf Hitler Jr. (Of course, the position didn't really exist. It was just there to make the kid feel like he was helping his father.)
And the two men came on pale horses. Everyone applauded- except for the fuhrer's wife who only banged her head on the table in response. Once the two sat at opposite ends of the table, Hiei looked down and saw a plate full of food. It was a small loaf of bread. He cautiously cut into it with the butter knife and puss began to flow from it. He made a grunt of disgust and decided to take a drink. The liquid was thick and he saw it pulsing. He put it back on the table. He saw the men were going behind a curtain, undressing as they walked over there. He didn't move, he just stayed in his seat and watched the wives congregate in a corner, showing each other the gifts from their eggs. He finally got tired of watching the wives, deciding to see what was happening behind the curtain. He saw the men lining up to copulate with a young woman, and he was angry to see it was Yukina. Just then, Hiei saw a man finish and walk to him. It was Heinrich. Hiei removed the dagger from his pocket and impaled him. He tuned the blade and heard a door unlock. He rolled over Heinrich's body and two hands came up from the hole that Heinrich's body was covering. He grabbed the hands and went into the hole. The two hands belonged to two women he knew well. It was Rui and...
"Mother..." Hiei reached out to her, but she slapped his hand so hard it turned red.
"I'm not your mother, Hiei," she replied.
"No, you are. And that's not my real name. You know that. My name's really Heinrich. You called me that. From the moment, you saw me you called me Heinrich after... after my father."
"That's not true, and you know that as a fact. Your mother simply said 'Heinrich' because she was cursing him. And she was glad that your parasitic self was out of her body. She was glad that soon you were going to be gone."
"That's not true. I remember..."
"You don't remember anything correctly. Memory alone didn't save all those innocents who were executed for crimes they never committed. Shouldn't you be an expert on such things, General Lvov or that false name you're using now Zamyatin?"
He didn't know what to say. "And Yuliya..."
"Yukina."
"Who are you? If you're not my mother, who are you?"
"I'm Dante."
"Rui" introduced herself as well, "Vergil."
He looked at his surroundings. It was like looking down someone's throat. Dante and Vergil shoved him down the cave until they reached stairs going down. He stared at the signs above the stairs for a moment ("Beware of dog" "Watch your step" "One way") and proceeded down them before the two would push him down. At the bottom of the stairs he saw Kurama guarding a gate, a rifle held at Right Shoulder arms, and when Kurama noticed the three he went straight to Port Arms. Hiei recognized the gate- it was the one that surrounded Moscow. The gate was covered with horrible attempts to cover the graffitied four lettered words typically referring to Germans and Americans. Kurama began to tense up, his finger on the trigger, as the two women pushed Hiei towards him.
"Peace, Cerberus," Dante said. Cerberus nodded in response and went to Left Shoulder Arms after opening the gate for them. He heard Cerberus whisper as they went in, "Well, don't put him through any heavy stuff, okay?"
It was the inside of a dungeon. People were chained to the walls, waiting to be taken into the rooms behind steel doors. Behind those doors, Hiei heard screaming and then two doors opened, tossing out Yusuke and Kuwabara. Yukina fell from a large hole in the ceiling and men that he knew from the army and the NKVD all fought for her. In the end, the man he knew to be Sergeant Kerensky won out. He dragged her into the room.
"Yuliya..." Hiei mumbled to himself.
"Don't call your sister by that false name. Oh, I also hope she's out of earshot now so she won't know that she's your sister because you claim that there's a gun held against your head, and the gunman'll shoot you if you tell," Dante said and backhanded him.
Vergil shrugged and explained, "You cannot fight it, you know. They will always take in people depending on how many are brought to be punished and how many are brought to be the punishers."
"Just as planned." Dante watched and tapped her wrist, indicating the limping figure that came their way was on time. Trapped in the endless cycle.
"Look who's here. It's the beggar." She gave the figure a swift kick in the knees, knocking it over. When it hit the ground, Dante stomped on the small of its back and spat on its face. They gave Hiei a questioning look for a moment when he didn't join in and continued their beating of "the beggar." When they stopped, "the beggar" stood up, slumped over, and straightened up just for a moment to give the three a wry (and obviously faked) smile. It was then that Hiei recognized her as Mukuro, a more pale and emaciated version of her. She held out two shaky hands and bowed her head.
"We also call The Beggar the Hermit when the desire comes to us. It never complains. It's gone through so many names and was never satisfied by any of them. Let's name of few- Thomas Johnson, James Hale, Albert Clancy... I can't think of any feminine names..." Vergil turned to Dante who had no idea either. "Well, the point is that you can give it any name you want. It could be anyone you choose."
"'It?' But she's obviously a woman," Hiei said.
"I thought I made that clear. It can be anything you want. It doesn't know which it is. It could be your mother if you truly wanted it to be. It's had so many acquired personae, it doesn't even know who itself really is, if it even had an identity in the first place. All it knows is that it wants a persona to please someone. Go ahead and give it a try. Well, your first statement made an impact..." Indicating that the Hermit had changed her posture.
He groaned, dreading the outcome. "Fine... Your name... It's Mukuro. And your last name's Reeve just because you thought it was cool, apparently."
The Hermit lifted her gaze. "Yes." And said nothing more.
"Don't forget that that's the one you have to punish," Dante said matter-of-factly.
"I'll do what to her?!" Hiei twisted around to stare at her.
"Okay, that's new for you. Change her persona to someone you don't know or don't like."
"But why? And either way, the face is the same."
"What, you hate her but not enough to kill her? You've tortured enough lives. In the end, all you've come to know and attempted to love with your stone cold heart will in turn be tortured by your hands."
"But that's not..." Everyone pointed at him and stared at him with faces with only the eye sockets to look in his direction. And they closed in closer and closer... They grabbed him. They put their fingers in his eye sockets... The hermit, the beggar, Mukuro watched before turning away to be beaten elsewhere.
-.-.-
Hiei sat up feeling the chill of sweat all over his body. He looked across the room and out the window. The blinds were closed. He sighed.
There were three small taps on the door, and Mukuro opened the door just a crack. She walked in when she saw that he was awake. "Looks like you're up." She proceeded to pull up a chair next to the bed and quickly took his temperature. "Can't have that damn drug in your system. Can't believe you would do something like that but... Looks like you're alright now. Physically, I mean. Or maybe not. You look like you're going to puke. Or... Well, you know what I'm getting at." She stood up. She moved the trashcan next to the bed in the case that Hiei couldn't make it to the bathroom. He was pretty sure that he wouldn't need it. He didn't think he had anything in him to vomit up. Still.
"They're in the walls, you know. They're listening," Hiei whispered. The voices were there. Just as they always were. They were putting their hands in the walls. For a moment, he saw the lady in white. Or the lady in white whose name he did know. But right now, she was the lady in white. She appeared behind the hermit, the beggar, Mukuro just for that moment and disappeared again. Because even the lady in white has forsaken him.
She cocked a brow and pressed her ear against the wall. She spoke softly, humming as she listened. "Hm... Yeah, I hear them, too."
"No, you don't."
"I could tell them to get the hell out of this place if you want me to."
"You don't think they're there."
She shrugged. "Well, I know where I'm not wanted..." She started to walk out but Hiei grabbed her by the wrist. She pulled back.
"Why're you doing that?" Hiei asked.
"...I hit my arm on the corner of the desk, and I think it bruised so it hurts like a bitch if you touch it."
"You're so full of crap." The fax machine on the desk started beeping. "Get me that, would you? ...So you'll wanna take a look at it?"
"Yeah. He just needs you to give an outline of what's going on right now just so he knows."
"That's why nothing ever gets done."
She sat back down next to the bed and took his temperature again. "I don't know why I keep doing this. You always feel like you're burning up." He grabbed her wrist again. "Would you quit that? What did I just tell you?"
"I know when people are lying, for one. I've done it for years so I know. And then I also felt it the first time." He paused. "...I never knew they were there."
"Because you never touched my wrists. I never let you touch me. There was never a reason to. There still is no reason to. Don't you remember or do you still have that drug in your system? Do you remember this? We just live together, work together, nothing more. We're still not friends. We never were. So we never had to know these things about each other. I don't know anything besides the basics just as you don't know much about me. Just the way you wanted. And the way it should be for me."
It was silent. "...So does it really hurt?"
"...Not so much anymore. I guess I grew into them or something. Actually, I doubt I ever grew much since they first put them on me." Silence again. She stood up and her tone changed back to the way it always was. Mukuro Reeve, the Chief. The hermit, the beggar... The empress. "So I take it you'll be coming to work tomorrow?'
And here was Hiei Heinrichovich Zamyatin, legally Vladien Heinrichovich Lvov... Born Heinrich Reinhard. "I guess."
"Good. By the way, your partner's gone MIA. That's unlike him."
"Yeah..." Looking out the window again. "It is."
-.-.-
Nov. 23 2008. IM AWAKE. Was in my apartment at three woke up at two am in the bathroom.
/And there was none.
1. Actually, formaldehyde stinks really badly. And they used to put soldiers on meth during World War II. So I've heard. I usually heard it in relation to Kamikaze pilots but...
2. Basically in Demon World, the Nazi party was able to hold power. A revolution happened so you have Nazi East Germany and a democratic but dictatorial West Germany. (What? It's possible!)
3. Reichsenfuhrer is the equivalent of a General. I'm not going to name the leaders when they appear... because ffnet says I can't have them in here anyway. Whatever.
4. Dante and Vergil are references to the Divine Comedy, in which Dante travels through hell. Or if you're a Devil May Cry fan, you could just picture those two. But... Please don't.
5. Attention is when a soldier just stands up all straight and whatnot. Right Shoulder arms is when the rifle is held so that it rests on the right shoulder (think of an anime character resting their sword on their shoulder). Port arms is when both hands are holding the rifle so one is near the trigger and the other is closer to the... Tip part. It's easier to explain with pictures. Left shoulder is the same as right shoulder... Obviously it's on the left shoulder. Google pictures if it's confusing.
Much love, JC.
(edit: And shit gets real! Once you realize Hiei's schizophrenic all along.)