A/N: Okay everyone. Warning. This chapter may upset a lot of you. Know that Pezberry is endgame and drama is necessary for growth. Extreme angst ahead. Try not to hate me too much! I hope you all like it. Also, this was written between the hours of two and three a.m. And I am not of sane mind. Well not of sane mind to edit. All mistakes are mine.

Please review.

Chapter 19

When she ran out behind her, she instantly found her way to her car. She was punching her steering wheel. The horn was blaring and she was probably attracting attention from the few clubs still left on school grounds, but she didn't look like she cared. She hadn't noticed the door opening until Brittany buckled her seat belt beside her and waited while Santana continued to wail on whatever was in front of her. Santana let out a huff of air, clenched her teeth and counted to ten. She put on her seat belt and pulled out of the parking lot. She hadn't said anything to her, yet.

"She didn't even come out to see if I was okay. What the fuck Britt? What's up with that?"

Brittany frowned at her. She didn't know what to say. Santana never really talked about how she felt when it came to people she's messed around with. She always talked about how hot she was and how much they liked it. She didn't know how to feel really. Santana denied any feelings she had toward her. And she thought that dating Tiff would make her forget about all the things that happened with San before. How she was in that river in Egypt about feelings she had for girls. But now she was having all those feelings with Rachel. And it was kind of making her upset. San always talked about how when they did stuff it wasn't cheating or it didn't mean anything. San never let reciphicate her physically. She had always wanted to.

"San…"

"Yea Britt?"

She took a deep breath.

"Why wasn't I good enough?"

"What? What are you talking about?"

She was looking away from her, the tears kind of a surprise because she didn't really realize she felt this way. She thought she was happy with Tiff. With how things were. And San was so happy now. It was making her upset that she wasn't the one giving her all the happiness.

"Why did you pick Rachel? I mean you're jealous, San. You used to get jealous over me…and now you get jealous over her. I know you let her touch you…I know that you've let her go farther than I have. Why wasn't I good enough?"

Santana wasn't saying anything. She was breathing deep and her eyes were all watery but she wasn't crying. She didn't know what to do. She drove a little while longer without saying anything, and she pulled over to a place near the park they used to feed the ducks at. The trees and the random shrubs hid her car from the main road. She turned off the engine.

Santana looked serious. Like, she was ready to talk about her feelings. Like she needed to tell her something really important.

"Britts… I have something I need to show you, okay? I need to explain something to you because…I—I should have showed you a long time ago because you're my best friend."

Brittany just nodded. She watched Santana unbutton her pants, pulling them down and yanking her thumb under her tight underwear. Brittany hadn't expected what popped out of the opening.

"Oh my gosh, San, you're an andromonus."

Santana rolled her eyes.

"No—Britt—I was just…born with both."

Brittany wasn't looking away.

"Like… like a boygirl? A he-she?"

Santana shook her head and tucked herself back into her pants.

"Something like that Britt."

Brittany looked at her for a long time. Trying to take in the information Santana had just given her. She stared for moments after, starting at her face and ending back at her still undone pants.

"Why didn't you tell me? I wouldn't have been grossed out, S… I thought we told each other everything."

Santana frowned.

"I-I was going to get it cut off… and just, be a girl."

She was thinking really hard. She wanted to ask so many questions… but one was more important that the others.

"Does Rachel know?"

Santana shook her head in the positive. She was staring straight forward. And she refused to look in her direction.

"Do you love her, San?"

She shrugged.

"Maybe. Probably."

Brittany hated words. Words were so easily broken. Sometimes they can make you feel better. Sometimes they can crush you to pieces.

"It's not cheating if the plumbing's different right?"

Santana looked her way then. And she knew that she understood what she was trying to say.

"I can't Britt. I can't mess this up."

She thought long again in silence. She chose her next words carefully.

"San. She didn't even call to see if you were okay. She stayed with that Karofsky girl and you're here with me. I need to know if this… if we would have been different. Especially if I can't have you ever again. I want to know, San. How we are… together. You letting me…love you. I want to be able to touch you, to do things you did for me. Please?"

000 0000 000

"So she's your girlfriend huh? She's hot."

They'd stayed behind to talk about her vocal coaching. Of course Mr. Schue asked her to do it. And Bella eagerly thanked him for his suggestion.

"Why are you doing this, Bella? I thought you were going to be fair."

Bella sighed.

"I am. I didn't come here to try to sabotage your relationship, Rach. I just found out that Tina was in the glee club, and well, she screams gay—I needed to look disinterested, so I sat with you. I'm totally not going to step on your girl's toes. Speaking of which, why didn't you follow her out?"

Rachel was waiting for that question. She felt bad almost immediately, but she knew it had to be done.

"First off. Tina has a boyfriend. They've been dating for a while now—"

Bella laughed.

"Pish Posh. Technicalities."

Rachel squinted at her, choosing to ignore that particular comment.

"And… no one knows about us. And there is good reason they don't. If I would have ran after her everyone would be suspicious. And… She isn't ready for that."

Bella put on a serious face.

"You're my friend first, Rach. Do you want to be out? Like, if you can't handle her being in the closet… maybe you two should take a break until she's ready to admit to herself that she's gay-"

Rachel stopped her, derailing her train of thought.

"It's not like that, Bella. I appreciate your concern. I just… it's not the right time yet. And we both know why. And I'm not upset about that at all. But she'd kill me if I made a scene right now. She can't afford the backlash."

Bella was looking at her solemnly. She looked like she wanted to say something else, but the slow smile spread across her face.

"Okay. You're a big girl. I won't press the issue. Just be careful. And I apologize. I didn't mean for it come off that way. I'm fully committed to be your friend. I won't cross that line again, scouts honor. I'll even apologize to her!"

Rachel laughed out loud.

"I'd give her a little while. You know, avoid her in the halls, and try not to get in her way. Just until she feels a little better."

Bella laughed then, bumping into her shoulder.

"Got ya. She's a lucky girl. Make sure she treats you right."

She smiled, thinking about calling Santana once she got home.

"She will, Bella. No worries."

000 0000 000

She could never say no to Brittany S. Pierce. It was a known fact. She knew what they were doing was wrong. She knew that it would ultimately hurt Rachel. But she owed this to Brittany. She owed so much to her best friend. And this was the last time…so she gave in. She would worry about the guilt and the regret after. She would decide once and for all if she was supposed to be this way. She would be certain then if she was supposed to be with Rachel. She would know for sure if keeping her entire self from her best friend was the right decision. If canceling the surgery was the right decision.

They were sitting in the back of her coupe; the front seats pushed all the way forward. She was lying slanted on the back seat, Brittany pulling down her pants and underwear in one go. She climbed up her body, making sure not to bang her head on the ceiling as she kissed her. She didn't realize how much she missed her sweet lady kisses. She didn't pull her shirt off; she rolled it up and tucked it under her chin. She was palming her breasts and kissing and nipping small patches of skin. Brittany was sucking and nipping and flicking her tongue at the same time. And she couldn't think anymore about all the things she was doing wrong. She was getting hard, and Brittany was winding her up and keeping her tense. When she crouched down and put her mouth over the head of her penis, her head fell back onto the arm rest. She knew what to kiss… what to bite. What her mouth couldn't reach, her hands made up the distance, the circular motion her head made while it bobbed up and down her penis was making her wet. The hollow in her cheeks was making her harder, if possible. If she let her keep going, she was going to embarrass herself.

Brittany sat directly above her erection; her shoulders crouched while she seductively rolled her hips above her. Brittany's body was so… graceful. Every move was deliberate; she was engaging her with this dance. She was touching her… she was caressing her. It was erotic. It was beautiful. It was closure.

She was stroking her penis, rubbing wet parts of her onto the head. She was kissing her, and rubbing her hands across her breasts, skimming her nipples and setting her nerve endings on fire. She cupped her face, and kissed her full on the lips. And somewhere else, the grinding slowed and she steadied herself above her. They were perfectly aligned; before she could blink, Brittany lowered herself down, hands free, squeezing muscles she didn't know you could contort along her shaft. Then the rhythm changed. She wasn't used to being with someone so… skilled. But her body made its own contributions as they thrust together, hitting the right spots with the pull and push of her thrusting hips, and Brittany's strong, toned thighs.

Her hand was reaching out to cup her breast through her shirt. Brittany's mouth was open, panting perfect moans into the sweat box that was now her car. Her other hand was gripping her bottom, squeezing it as it lifted out of her hand, and touched back down with each stroke. She was completely entranced with the woman dancing so delectably on her lap. She never know how different it could be inside of someone else…

She couldn't tell yet which she liked better.

She promptly pulled out of her and laid her back against the seat. She pushed one of her legs up near her head, and balanced her body weight against it, minding the physics of her midsized car, she pushed into her, deep and wet all the way to the hilt. She managed to pull her other leg high enough to wrap around her neck, and the change in angle was tickling something deep inside her. Brittany was whimpering, and she could feel the swelling. The pockets of something warm building inside of Brittany and squeezing all the stamina out of her. She was pivoting into her, the odd angle forcing her to keep with the pace, short deep strokes into her before she felt the gush… flutter and squeeze of Brittany's orgasm. She could feel the pulse pushing to the forefront, with a few more hard thrusts; she was emptying herself into the tightness she was engulfed in.

And then it was quiet.

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A/N: So I'm sure you all hate me. But things will work out. Hopefully my Brittany isn't too bad- and oops about the POV switch. My omnipresence is showing. Will Santana tell? What will happen in therapy? What about the surgery? There will be a game changing argument as well as the decisions about the surgery. So many questions will be answered soon. And I'm back! Look for a LOT of updates and a few new (and already completed) stories to be uploaded as well.

Please Review.