Author's Notes: Sorry this took so long to post, I was trying to pick up some emotional slack from the end of the last chapter. I decided I didn't know how to tweak that further in a way that looked good, so I'm hoping to turn things back in the right direction starting here. I also tried a different way of indicating a flashback, which I hope isn't too confusing. Enjoy.

All characters and places in this work are owned by Nintendo.

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Saving You, Saving Myself
Chapter Seven: More Than Memories

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Ness opened his eyes reluctantly, unable to keep from rousing now that the room was beginning to become lighter. His gaze flicked to the window and the gradually brightening sky, then down to the other boy. He was still sleeping peacefully, his arms wrapped around Ness' torso in a loose embrace. A small smile touched the dark-haired boy's lips, marveling at how Lucas never let go. Not once, since they'd started sharing a bed. His heart swelled with deep adoration for the soft-spoken blonde, but as the night's telepathic journey revisited him, his smile dissolved.

What am I supposed to do now?

With a sigh, he extricated himself from Lucas' arms, being extremely careful not to disturb his slumber. If Ness had too much on his mind to go back to sleep, there was no reason to wake him with it, too. Quietly padding barefoot across the wooden floor, he shrugged off his pajama top, already unbuttoned the previous night, courtesy of Lucas. Pulling his striped shirt over his head, he began to contemplate everything he'd seen and learned in the last twenty-four hours. He was so deeply immersed in his thoughts that the act of getting dressed happened out of habit, almost mechanically, rather than consciously.

Maybe he shouldn't have burdened Lucas with any of it, even while awake. Not that he ever asked him to carry any of the load. Lucas could not help but worry about Ness, and by now the black-haired boy realized that his actions were driven purely out of love. Pulling his hat on as a finishing touch, he looked to where the blonde boy still slept in his bed. Eyes softening as he gazed at Lucas, Ness saw how untroubled he seemed when he slept. The one time he didn't seem to worry so much. He quietly crossed the room, pulling the the quilt at the foot of the bed over Lucas to keep him warm, a meager replacement for Ness' body heat.

He sighed again, not quite knowing what to do with himself now. Leaning down, he tentatively kissed the other boy's forehead. Lucas murmured contentedly, but remained asleep as Ness turned and exited the room. Tiptoeing down the stairs, he paused at the kitchen table. The bowl of fruit there held no interest, despite the gnawing in his stomach. Perhaps if a steak had been sitting there instead of apples... or maybe it wasn't hunger that made his belly feel like this.

He left the house then, giving Boney the usual scratch behind the ears, but only half-heartedly. Jamming his hands into his pockets, he found himself walking, not really having a destination in mind. The rhythmic pounding against the path as he put one foot in front of the other was slightly calming, lulling his mind into a state where he didn't have to think so hard. He didn't want to think about anything right now. As he wandered through the village square, Ness didn't acknowledge the people that greeted him, a blank expression on his face, leaving them staring after him in confusion. He didn't have it in him to talk to anyone just now.

The next thing he became aware of was the sound of crashing waves. Like a robot with a pre-programmed directive, Ness had made his way to the cliffs overlooking the ocean, the place he'd come with Lucas so many times. Gazing dully at the water, he sat down on the grass and pulled his knees to his chest, arms resting folded across the top. Resting his chin on his forearm, he chewed on his lower lip, brows knitting together. Here in this place, he realized it wasn't easy to refrain from thinking about his memories. He knew, deep inside, he should be thinking about them, giving them weight, keeping them close to his heart.

But they hurt. One way or another, he hurt. The homesickness washed over him in a way that frightened him, the memories vying for dominance. Closing his eyes tightly, he tried to force them out of his head. He couldn't lose his composure like that. What would Lucas think?

Lucas... the soft-spoken blonde had unintentionally complicated things. Ness never imagined to find such a good friend when he washed up on the shore... nor did he expect to fall so hard for him. It was true, he loved Lucas. Upon realizing this, he began struggling to figure out where his true loyalties resided. The blonde-haired boy had saved him from the brink of death, took care of him, held his hand through all of this mess... which he had stupidly started. Against Paula's wishes.

Helplessly, he began to think about her, the final moments before he had been unwittingly tossed into the future. Paula had looked so concerned for him, like her heart was ripping in two when he said he was going to attempt the new teleportation regardless of what any of them said. Ness had not wanted anyone else to risk testing it. It was the last thing Dr. Andonuts had been studying before he disappeared, and he felt it was important to continue the research. For Jeff's sake. The only thing that was left to do was to actually try it.

He merely touched her nose with the tip of his finger and gave her a peck on the cheek, trying to assure her that nothing bad was going to happen, while ignoring her pleading. He had flashed a smile then, the dazzling smile that made Paula fall for him in the first place... the smile he reserved for her alone... and in that moment, she could only sigh in defeat. Her arms wrapped around him suddenly, hugging him tightly with force that belied her slender body. Ness had been taken by surprise at the display of affection... such things were in Paula's nature to do only when they were alone. But here she was, embracing him tightly in front of Jeff and Poo.

And then she kissed him. For what felt like endless seconds her lips molded firmly into his, and in the midst of this uncharacteristically forward approach, Ness began to feel hesitation. Paula's kiss conveyed a such a powerful feeling of love, and with it came a finality. Like it would never happen again. He couldn't allow himself to believe it would be the last time... but even so... His arms wrapped possessively around her, seeking to linger in the moment, kissing her back... as though he was memorizing it. Ness steeled his resolve to make everything work out, because he remembered everytime they touched how fiercely he loved her, too.

Only Jeff clearing his throat reminded Ness of their audience, and with a sigh he stepped back from Paula, whose cheeks became flushed to a lovely shade of pink to match her dress. Reluctantly, she slipped her arms off of him and took a step back as well.

"Did Paula manage to convince you not to be dumb?" Jeff glanced sideways at Paula.

"Are you kidding? That was a bon voyage."

"If you're done making jokes, can you at least try to focus so you don't get killed?" Poo said sternly.

Paula visibly flinched.

"Impossible, now that Paula bestowed me with good luck." Ness put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

His decision had been made. With friends like these, no silly teleport was going to break their bonds. Of that, Ness was completely confident. Striding to the middle of the deserted field they had gathered in, to allow plenty of room for this questionable fiasco, he turned to look back at the faces of his friends. They all looked dubious of his success, but he knew he'd see them again.

"Well, looks like it's go time," Ness nodded at Jeff.

"I guess there's no stopping you..." He adjusted his glasses with a sigh, glancing at Poo who stood silently next to him.

"Ness..."

"What is it, Paula?" Ness met her gaze and saw the worry there again.

"You'd better come back..."

"Okay." He grinned.

Ness could briefly recall the sensation when he activated the PSI. Unlike other teleportation abilities he had used before, this one immediately felt stronger, like the very cells of his body were being broken down and scattered. Then he had inexplicably been tossed into the ocean. It stretched from horizon to horizon, as far as he could see. Even when his arms began to tire while he treaded the water, he had indulged in his fantasy that he would be able to kiss Paula again. He tried to think about the texture of her golden hair, the taste of her cherry-flavored lip gloss... it brought him comfort, even when the darkness swept over him.

The dark-haired boy shivered, though the morning was balmy. He stared coldly at the small waves bobbing over the water with deceptive innocence. That ocean had nearly taken him, away from everything he loved. But Lucas had saved him. When he had opened his eyes on that shore, he caught a glimpse of the boy's face, with those fathomless blue eyes, and briefly wondered if he was in heaven. He had thought that an angel surely must have come to greet him.

He sighed, hugging his knees tighter to his chest. Lucas didn't even realize how much good he truly had done. Ness had managed to catch parts of the blonde's memories in the midst of the torrent of his own. He knew he had carried a heavy burden too, and also blamed himself for the death of his brother. To Lucas, feeling responsible for what happened to Claus more or less nullified any sort of peace of mind he might have deserved after the seventh needle had been pulled, and the world restored. Ness often wished he could kiss away every silly thought like that in his head.

Lucas blamed himself for a lot of things that weren't his fault, and Ness had always felt an intense urge to fight off his fears and calm his regrets as best he could. It may not have been perfect, but he wanted to help... needed to feel like he was doing some good in return for Lucas' kindness. Lucas trusted him implicitly, and it brought warmth to Ness' heart to see him smile. Though it was never discussed, he was fairly certain the blonde didn't have many reasons to smile before he showed up.

In recent days, Lucas smiled almost all the time, like a great weight had been lifted. In a very real way, it had. The pressures of trying to hide developing feelings he harbored for Ness became too much, but he was glad Lucas had revealed them. It was a big step for him, coming forth with his nervous kiss... completely oblivious to the fact that the feelings had been mutual the entire time. Ness had managed to sit on his urges most of the time, but sometimes his playful banter with the blonde had seemed to dissolve into what could only be classified as flirting. Of course, the dark-haired boy tried his best to keep things in check, he hadn't been sure until their lips touched that it was safe to pursue.

The problem was, now that his memories had resurfaced, he questioned whether it had really been safe to pursue, even though it was mutual. Ness sighed as he deliberated. His memories of home, and especially of Paula, reached for him with vivid clarity. He remembered exactly the way her hair smelled... like vanilla... and the way she would pout cutely when he'd tease her, only to beam at him moments later. The only other player in a private game between the two of them. Now that he remembered... he remembered how much he loved her.

But he loved Lucas, too. His quiet support and admiration stoked his ego, which needed more nurturing than Ness ever let anyone else know. The blonde seemed to intuitively know when he needed a kiss or hug, or his hand squeezed in reassurance. Behind Lucas' quiet front, Ness could see countless stories he wanted to uncover when he looked into his eyes. Lucas fascinated him, comforted him, and was completely devoted, without any room for doubt. Ness almost felt like it was a betrayal to think about these things, but what else was there to do?

"Ness...?" A hesitant voice spoke from behind him.

The sound of his approach startled him, even though it was soft.

"Hey, Lucas..."

"I was confused when you weren't there when I woke up... but I thought you might be here."

Of course Lucas would know.

"Yeah... sorry about that... I needed to think without overwhelming you," Ness tapped his forehead with the tip of his finger, smiling apologetically.

"I only see stuff when we touch... and anyway, it's okay... I don't mind helping you sort it all out." The other psychic had seated himself next to him.

Ness tensed as the blonde approached, not necessarily wanting to share everything he was thinking just now. Concerned, Lucas reached out for him.

"Lucas, don't--"

Before Ness could stop him, the blonde's fingers lightly brushed the back of his hand, only to be torn away as though he'd been scalded. Ness winced. It was clear from the look on Lucas' face that whatever he'd seen in that split second, he didn't like it. Why should he? Lucas sighed heavily and looked down. He had noticed Ness' mental comparison between two of the people he loved most.

"I'm sorry, Ness."

"Huh..?" The black-haired boy arched a brow in confusion.

"I'm being selfish... and I feel bad about it, but I can't stop."

"What do you mean?"

"I can't m-make myself pretend... to be happy anymore that you're remembering things... because the more you remember... the more I feel like I'm losing you to those m-memories..." The blonde stammered as he began to flush in embarrassment. "I-I just wish I could keep you all to myself forever... all mine... not P-Paula's... and... I know you deserve so much better than me... but..."

Ness' expression hardened as Lucas fumbled with his words.

"Shut up."

"W-What?" His head jerked up in surprise.

Ness' face was contorted into a scowl, angrily glaring out at the water. Lucas shrank back, afraid of the look in his eyes. He'd never seen Ness angry before... he'd always been so good-natured around the blonde-haired boy. Now, he was furious and Lucas had no idea what think. Was he mad that he'd mentioned Paula?

"Stop apologizing to me, I mean... seriously, what the hell, Lucas. I'm the selfish one here."

"What?" Lucas repeated, eyes wide.

"Why do you always apologize when you've done nothing wrong? ...And come down on yourself? It drives me crazy." Ness sighed, finally turning to the blonde psychic.

His eyes were unreadable.

"I..." Lucas trailed off, completely at a loss.

"I'm the one who can't make a choice, Lucas. I'm so damn afraid of stepping on anyone's feelings I walk the line without having the balls to pick one or the other. You don't understand how hard it is to choose. If I could get away with it," Ness sighed again, "I'd have you both, even in the same time and place."

Ness buried his face in his hands, feeling like a monster for saying these things to the sensitive blonde.

"Ness..."

"You can't see what I see in you. What's already there inside of you... and the potential. You just don't know how easy it is to love you." The dark-haired boy's voice was cracking with emotion.

"...Ness?" His voice was timid.

"...What?"

"I don't know how much anyone else can love me..." Lucas began hesitantly, searching for the right words. "But I just hope to be good enough, since you're stuck here..."

Ness did not answer for a long time.

"Lucas..." He said softly. "I'm sorry, Lucas. I'm the one who owes you an apology."

"W-What for?" Lucas breathed.

"You think you're competing with a memory... but it goes deeper than you think."

"I don't understand..."

"When we first began to be able to see each other's thoughts... I thought it was the coolest thing ever. I felt I could trust you completely so I was happy to share myself with you."

"Me too, Ness."

"But there's something... that I've tried to lock down because I didn't want to think about it consciously. It made my feelings harder to sort out, and I didn't want you to know... because I didn't want to hurt you." Ness looked up at Lucas, his eyes full of guilt. "But I think you have a right to know..."

"What is it...?" Lucas' eyes were frightened as he returned his gaze.

"I'm not stuck here at all, Lucas... I've remembered how to activate PK Teleport Ω. In my dream last night... Paula told me I should use it to go home."

The blonde trembled as he absorbed this new information. It was something he might've guessed eventually, had he been completely masochistic to his own heart. He never wanted to even consider the possibility of Ness having a means of leaving him.

"...Oh..." Lucas whispered, a lump forming in his throat.

"...That's the choice I need to make."