Chapter 1: Wrath of Love

Shepard was waiting impatiently in the decontamination room with two of her crewmembers, Garrus and Miranda. She tapped her foot vigorously on the ground. If the floor wasn't so sturdy she would have bore a hole through the ground. As soon as the door to the Normandy's interior flushed open Shepard rushed through them.

"Commander you're back! How did it go with…?"

Shepard swiftly walked passed Joker without even acknowledging he was there, let alone talking to her.

Joker turned to Garrus whom by now was standing by the pilot's chair.

"It was that bad huh? Man just when I thought Alenko and Shepard would bring some more juicy gossip aboard the Normandy."

Garrus rolled his eyes and thought about smacking him upside the head, but instead he let it go.

"Yeah, it was pretty bad down there. If she didn't care for him so much, I swear I would have drop kicked his ass after the things he said to her…. After the things he accused her of."

"Humph, really? What happened?" Jokers face brightened a little. He always loved hearing a scandalous story, especially one between the two lover birds.

"Sorry Joker, not my place to say. If you want to know badly, why don't you ask Shepard?"

With that Garrus leaned off of Jokers chair and made for the elevator. As he was walking down the hallway towards the map of the Normandy, Kelly shot him a concerned look. He just knew she was going to ask him what had happened.

"Garrus, can I talk to you for a second?"

He sighed, "Sure, what's on your mind?"

She looked to the ground. She seemed, nervous.

"Well… I, uh, this is hard for me to say. I'll just go right out and say it." She took in a deep breath, trying to steady her heart beat. Then she glanced back at him, into his eyes. "Garrus, I have always found you interesting, intriguing really. I have been fighting the urge to come down and talk to you ever since you stepped foot onto the Normandy. But just now, seeing how upset Shepard was after talking with Kaidan, it dawned on me; I can't hold my feelings in any longer. If I do I might never get the chance to ever tell you how I feel."

Garrus shifted on his feet, feeling a bit awkward. He's never been hit on let alone even considered hitting on a human before. He'd always found them unattractive, of course besides Shepard, but Shepard, well she's different. But listening to Kelly, and seeing how nervous she was, it kind of intrigued him.

"Garrus, I think I have a crush on you. No, I know I have a crush on you and I was wondering if possibly we could go out and have drinks next time we land somewhere, when we get some shore leave." She gazed deeply into his eyes searching for something, anything that would tell her that she didn't make the biggest mistake of her life.

She's usually good at reading people's feelings, considering her job status. But when it came to Garrus, she had no clue as to what was going on in that Turian head of his. That's part of the reason why she was attracted to him in the first place.

Garrus cleared his throat, feeling it start to tighten a little, thinking a glass of water sounded extremely appetizing at the moment. "I am very flattered Kelly, I can honestly say I have never had a human advance on me before, actually come to think about it, it's never really happened, ever."

Her cheeks started turning a bright red, almost matching the color of her hair. She tried desperately to control the blushing, but it wasn't happening.

"But, yeah, I would like to share a drink with you, why not? What have I got to lose?" Immediately after saying that, he regretted it. It sounded ass-ish. Did he really just say, 'what have I got to lose?' He swore he heard Joker laugh to himself right after saying that. Garrus made a mental note to bug him about it later.

Kelly didn't mention how that sounded, she just seemed relieved he didn't blow her off and say no. In fact, she smiled gracefully, her eyes twinkling from the lights gleaming down from above her. She simply nodded and turned to her screen continuing her work. With that Garrus headed towards the elevator and back to his job, working on calibrations.

Shepard stormed off pasted Joker not noticing what he said, and at this moment she didn't give a crap. The only thing on her mind was getting to the private bar stashed away where Kasumi often stayed and drinking until she passed out. She had been extremely furious following what had been said on Horizon between her and Kaidan. She couldn't believe what had come out of his mouth. Had he really thought all those things about her? Did he really think she had forgotten what they shared? As soon as she made it to the elevator she sunk against the wall and eventually plopped to the floor. She buried her hands in her face and quietly sobbed.

"I-I don't deserve this," she said out loud, talking to nobody but herself, "all I wanted to do was-was find him so I could be with him again." Her tears began to fall more rapidly down her cheeks. Leaving behind white streaks where the dirt from Horizon was washed away from the salty solution mix her eyes let out.

The door to the elevator swished open, she quickly rose and wiped the tears from her face and made her way to where the liquor was stashed. She grabbed the most potent liquor she could find and started to make her way back towards the elevator. When she stepped foot out of the room she noticed someone out of the corner of her eye. Samara was standing there, taking her in, and deciding whether or not to say anything. She didn't, instead she turned around and headed back towards the observation deck. Before the door closed Shepard heard her heave out a heavy worried sigh. Still paused in her tracks, she felt her shoulders sag even more than before. Had she upset Samara with retorting straight to the alcohol? No matter, Shepard didn't care; this was the only way she could cope with what had just happened a few moments ago.

She turned and made her way towards the elevator, pressed the button and waited patiently for it to make its way down. She glanced at the bottle that was grasped tightly in her hand.

"Well might as well get started on it now."

She cracked open the Asari liquor and began taking huge gulps of it. Feeling the burning sensation wrap around her tongue, then sliding down towards the back of her throat, only to begin burning even more when it made its way down to her stomach. Concentrating on the sensation had temporarily distracted her from constantly replaying the scene between her and Kaidan.

The elevator door swished open only to reveal Garrus standing there in front of her. He looked surprised, thinking she would have been in her private room by now with the door locked tighter than ever before. He gave her a weak smile then proceeded to leave the elevator, only to realize that she was already tipsy and well on her way to being completely drunk. But she was a biotic, and don't they not feel the full effects of alcohol? Or was it not having a hangover afterwards? It didn't matter he refocused on the woman in front of him.

Shepard glanced at him not completely registering that he was standing there. She glanced down towards the liquor in her hands and spoke out loud with an unusual hoarse voice.

"Damn… this stuff really works." She chuckled. Without even realizing it she was guided into the elevator by Garrus which had also pressed the button sending it straight to her cabin. He knew she didn't want to talk to anyone right now. Just wanted to be alone and have time to think things over.

"Relax Shepard, go to your cabin and just relax, maybe even consider some sleep."

She stumbled up against the walls of the elevator and gave him a sheepish smile and proceeded to say something, but the doors quickly closed on the two of them. He sighed heavily and made his way back to his post. He couldn't help but worry about her.

Shepard finally made it to her cabin and demanded that EDI keep the door shut tight and to not be bothered unless the ship was being attacked or falling apart.

"Shepard, if you would like, I could tell Joker to set course for our next destination."

"EDI, please, just shhhh, shhhh," she cautiously made her way down the small flight of stairs before falling down by her bedside, "he can handle not having orders for now."

"Yes, Shepard. Logging you out, Shepard."

She laid her face down onto the edge of the bed finally feeling the full force affect of the alcohol. Clinging onto the bottle of liquor in her hand she glanced down at it, seeing that it was almost empty, she made an exaggerated groan.

"Just when tings were gettin' greatttt, I emmmm almost done with my bttlee. I sshould-ave brought two!" Barely being able to talk, she ending her statement with an excited shout, followed by small soft snores.

Joker couldn't help but feel left out of the loop. Since when did Garrus get so protective and not want to share vital information about what had happened between Shepard and Kaidan? The only real explanation Joker could think of was that it must have gone pretty awful. He was longing for some answers and he refused to be left in the dark. That's when he decided he would look at the camera footage that was stationed across the Normandy.

"A little spying won't hurt, besides someone has to know something about what had happened," he spoke to himself.

As he was looking through the camera footage, he started with Chakwas, maybe Shepard went to her for some 'motherly' advice. Nothing, next he looked at the observation deck, only to find Samara meditating. Before he switched to the next footage, he noticed that Samara's facial expression had darkened. That's when she floated back to the ground and rose up graciously in one fluid movement. He couldn't help but be in awe as he watched Samara, she always piqued his interests. She began to walk over towards the door exiting the observation deck. Crap, the angle is worth shit, that's when he came across the camera angled towards Samara getting a full view of the hallway. Watching patiently, he saw Shepard poke out of Kasumi's usual hiding spot. That also happens to be where the liquor was stashed away. As soon as he thought that he noticed Shepard gripping the liquor bottle with all her might as she glanced down the hallway towards Samara. Samara looked as though she was about to say something to Shepard, only then to turn around back into the room to carry on her meditating.

"That was strange." Joker spoke to himself out loud, baffled by what he just saw. "She couldn't have known what happened between her and Kaidan; she didn't even know that they were a couple!"He practically shouted the last bit. He made a mental note to talk to Samara about that next time he spoke with her. He only really spoke with her once, but in the small amount of time he did, he learned so much about her and her life that he couldn't get enough of it. Not in a sexual way, but in a friendly matter.

Focusing back on the Camera footage, he noticed that Shepard made her way to the elevator where Garrus showed up. By this time Shepard had already drank about one fourth of the bottle. Garrus was attempting to help a fumbling Shepard into the elevator, oh that's good! She's already tipsy and the bottle was still pretty full.

"Hah, woos!"

"Who's a woos?"

Joker jumped in his leather chair, startled by Jacks presence. He wasn't expecting anyone to be up here, let alone sneak up on him like that.

"Holly shit Jack! You can't just do that to me, I am a fragile person, and I could have broken a rib making me gasp like that! God!"

"Oh suck it up, pussy!" She groaned. "So are you going to tell me who's the woos or what?

"See for yourself!"

Jack leaned over the pilots shoulder looking at the intoxicated Shepard. She was sitting on the floor of the elevator singing a popular pop song that was constantly playing on repeat on the radio.

"Hah! Now that is a sight to see. Surprisingly she has a nice voice. I never picked her off as a good singer." Jack was obviously amused by what she was seeing.

"Yeah, I am just as surprised about that as you are. Wait what are you saying? Aren't you the slightest bit worried about Shepard? She practically ran for the alcohol when she stepped foot on the ship, and the only thing you notice is her singing abilities? Gah, I thought I was the insensitive one." Joker was visibly upset, but something about Jacks face lightened up his mood a bit.

"Honestly, I think that she should have brought him back to the Normandy so she could fuck the shit out of him, and then drop him back on Horizon after she was done with him. She's been extremely tense lately."

Joker couldn't help but make a disgusted face.

"Yeah, I wonder what could have possibly made her so tense! Hmm, I don't know, maybe a psychopathic crazy chick that has tattoos plastered all over her body? I don't know." He glanced over at her, only to see her smile a bit, and then quickly turn away from him. Did she actually like me saying that? He couldn't help but wonder.

"Whatever, Joke, if you don't want my company anymore, I won't bother you." She jumped up quickly, her movements carried by a force of anger that she couldn't control.

"Wait!" He spun around in his chair to face her. "I-I like your company. Besides who else would dare join me in spying on other crew members and make fun of them for the stupid things they say?"

She crossed her arms and turned around, giving him a brief smile, and then lightly punched him on the arm.

"Hey! What part of fragile human being don't you understand! Oh and by the way, don't call me Joke. I don't like pet nick names other than Joker." He sounded a bit aggravated.

This only made her laugh a bit too much, out of nervousness. She never actually enjoyed talking to a guy or anyone for that matter. She rarely trusts people in general, but there's something about Joker that piques her interest. Maybe it was that sly humor they both shared. She began to realize what she was thinking about and stopped herself from progressing the thought further. Pathetic, she thought to herself. But she didn't leave; instead she decided to stay with him in the cockpit.

"Alright then scoot your ass over and make some room. We've got some crewmen to fuck with!"