Chapter 6: A Very Fez-y Christmas

AN: This Chapter will be mainly a flash back and the flashback will be in "Italics."

Place: Foreman Kitchen

(Christmas Day 1979 at 4:00 pm, about four months prior)

Kitty and Red were in the kitchen. Red was sitting down at the table and Kitty was by the oven cooking. Then the door opened and all of the gang came through the door freezing with snow on their coats.

Red looked at the whole gang with annoyance, and said, "Why are you here? Why are you always here? Don't the rest of you have your own families to spend Christmas with? Like what about you kettle-head?"

Michael pointed at Kitty and said, "Well, Mrs. Foreman said I could bring Betsy and Brook over for Christmas dinner."

Red looked at Kitty and said, "Kitty…"

Kitty smiled and said, "Well, Red you want to leave them out in the cold on that baby's first Christmas?"

Red said, "Ok, fine."

Red looks at the other and says, "What about the rest of you? Why aren't you with your families?"

Hyde said, "Hey man, I would be with my dad and sister, but they're at a business meeting. I don't know about you but I would rather be eating a tree shaped cookie at nine o'clock than working."

Red looked at Donna and she said, "Hey my family always spends Christmas with your family. Besides, I wanted to be with Hyde this Christmas."

Hyde wrapped his arms around Donna and said, "That's another reason I'm here."

Kitty, who hasn't been able to accept the idea of Hyde and Donna together, said, "Uh-uh, no evil vile things in my house you will do, you harlot."

Red, not wanting a fight in his house, said, "Kitty… We talked about this."

Kitty, still upset, said, "Well sorry Red if I have some hard feelings against the girl who nearly married my son."

Red shook his head then looked at Fez and said, "What about you Tarzan? Don't your people spend Christmas in a mud-hole?"

Fez angrily said, "Yes, but you don't have to push it in my face!"

Red looked at Jackie and said, "How about you?"

Jackie shrugged and said, "Hey, Mrs. Foreman said I could come."

Red looked at Eric, and Eric said, "Hey, I live here."

Red with disappointment said, "I know, and every morning I look up to ask God, 'why does my near twenty year old son still live here?'"

Kitty, smiling, said, "Ok now, why don't all of you go down stairs, while I finish cooking us up a beautiful Christmas dinner."

The gang walked towards the basement. About ten minutes later the gang was in their normal seating arrangement, while watching a TV Christmas Special.

Fez grinning said, "You all want guess what I have for a surprise?"

Donna said, "Ok Fez, but this better not be about your escapades in the bathroom because nobody wants to hear about that."

Fez said, "No, you all know about that already. The surprise is…"

Then there was a knocking at the basement door.

"That must be my surprise right now." Fez said, while opening up the door to a beautiful woman.

Fez wrapped his arm around the girl's waist and said, "Guys this is my new girlfriend Karen. Everybody say hello."

Everybody said, "Hey"

Karen said, "So who's who?"

Fez smiled and said, "Well the one sitting on the freezer and has the face of a god is Kelso."

Kelso chuckled and said, "You look really fine. Too bad you couldn't have had a ride on Kelso's Train of Sex!"

Fez said, "Oh, and he has also done it with about ninety percent of the women in this town."

Kelso gave an offended yelp and said, "I have not! I have done it with only ninety percent of the HOT women in this town… and parts of Kenosha."

Fez said, "The two who are holding hands are Hyde and Donna, and they are DOING IT!"

Donna angrily said, "Shut up Fez!"

Hyde said, "Karen if you want to know a little fact about your new boyfriend, he has probably watched everybody in this room have sex with someone at some time."

Karen giggled and said, "That's okay that just means he will have had lots of experience when we get to have sex."

Kelso said, "Fez, if I was not currently dating the mother of my daughter I would be hurt that you did not tell me of the place where they make this type of women."

Fez said, "Well…"

(Everything stops)

"Jackie, get to the point because this story is taking way too long." Donna said.

"Well excuse me for telling the story as accurately as I can." Jackie said, "Okay, I'll skip to after the part where Fez tells us where he met Karen."

Fez groaned and said, "But that was the best part."

Jackie said, "Now where was I…"

(Everything fasts forward, then stops and starts again)

Fez still with his arm around his new girlfriend says, "So, the thin twig sitting right next to us is Eric Foreman."

Eric pointed his finger in the air and said, "I'll let you know Fez, lift over three boxes now."

Hyde said, "Foreman that was moving three boxes of tissues and you moved them over twenty feet. After words, you were breathing really hard and sweating up a storm."

Eric, still trying to make his point, said, "But three months ago I could only lift two."

Fez said, "Moving on. The girl sitting in the middle, who is very bitchy, and…"

"Fez, I really don't want to hear this right now." Jackie said annoyingly.

Hyde looked at Jackie oddly and said, "Jeez Jackie, what's gotten into you?"

Jackie, annoyed, said, "Look, we all know Fez has a new girlfriend we don't need to listen to every single detail about her."

Kelso got off the freezer and said, "You know what you problem is Jackie? You don't have a slinky like the one Brooke got me for Christmas this morning."

Kelso started playing with a metal slinky that was in his pocket the entire time.

Hyde said, "Jackie I thought you could be nice on Christmas, but your being just a tiny, loud bitch."

Donna, agreeing with Hyde, said, "Yeah, stop being such a bitch Jackie, it's Christmas."

Jackie got up and rushed out the basement door, leaving everybody there with a deathly quiet moment.

"AWW, the slinky is all tangled now!" Kelso loudly said while fiddling with his now oddly shaped slinky.

Another moment waited before Eric said, "Hey, who's going to go check on Jackie?"

Hyde, in the middle of a passionate kiss with Donna, broke away for a second and said, "Foreman, busy!"

Fez, also in the middle of a passionate kiss said, "Busy!"

Foreman looked at Kelso.

Kelso looked up and said, "Dude, I have a broken slinky here."

Foreman slightly raised his hands and said, "So you guys want me to go outside and talk to Jackie?"

Everybody yelled, "Yes!"

Eric got up and went outside. Eric when he reached the top of the outside basement stairs, he started to be able to hear Christmas music coming from inside the house. Foreman turned the corner and found Jackie sitting and crying on top of the hood of the Vista Cruiser. Foreman walked over to the Vista Cruiser and sat on the hood next to Jackie. Foreman put a hand on Jackie's back, and Jackie leaned in towards Eric's shoulder to continue to cry. They stayed like this for about a few more minutes before Jackie stopped crying.

Eric looked at Jackie and said, "Okay now that you're done making ice on my shoulder, do you want to tell me what's wrong?"

Jackie, still upset, chuckled a bit and said, "Well, it is just that I am upset because everybody has a somebody right now and I don't. Plus, I haven't had a guy ask me out since I broke up with Hyde, so seeing all of them in there with their dates is just making me feel all lonely inside."

Eric continued to look at Jackie and said, "Jackie is that really all?"

Jackie looked down and said, "No… my mom has disappeared again and she has been gone for two weeks, and with my father in jail, and everybody but me having somebody. I just feel like I'll never have somebody to be there for me and I'll be lonely for my whole life."

Eric patted Jackie on the back and said, "Hey, it's okay. Jackie, I want to let you know that you are not the only one alone on Christmas this night."

Jackie, getting a little choked up, said, "Yeah, but at least you've been out with other women since you broke up with Donna."

Eric shook his head and said, "Actually Jackie, I haven't."

Jackie looked a little shocked and said, "Wait a minute so you've lied to everyone in the gang about all your dates?"

Eric nodded his head and said, "Yep, everyone."

Jackie said, "Why?"

Eric said, "I didn't want everyone to think I was a skinny, nerdy loser."

Jackie said, "Eric, everyone is going to think you are skinny and nerdy, it's going to stick with you for your whole life, but how come you haven't gotten a girl?"

Eric said, "Well first of all, I am skinny and nerdy. Second, I am a near twenty year old man still living with his parents. Third, dating only one girl in my life hasn't helped much."

Jackie giggled and said, "Yeah, you never did date anybody outside of Donna."

Eric laugh with Jackie for a little bit. Then Frank Sinatra's 'White Christmas' was being played inside of the house.

Eric got off the cruiser and said, "Hey, why don't we be each other's somebody tonight?"

Jackie smiled at Eric and said, "Are you sure you want to be the 'devil's' somebody on Christmas?"

Eric smiled back and said, "Sure, unless you don't want to?"

Jackie, still smiling, said, "Why not."

Eric the put his hand out in front of Jackie in a gentlemen-like fashion and said, "Then I believe, my lady, I must request your presence with me on this driveway for a dance."

Jackie accepted his hand and got off the Vista Cruiser. Jackie walked out in front of Eric and put her hands on his shoulder. Eric, put his hands on her waist, and they began to dance. They would dance together for the entirety of the song. As the song ended Eric and Jackie looked into each other's eyes and each of them got a feeling that each of them was unsure about until later.

(End flashback)

Eric and Jackie now outside on the driveway holding each other like they did on that Christmas night four month ago and looking at each other with a lot of passion.

"LAME!", Kelso shouted.

Everyone now looked at Kelso before Kelso said, "It would have been better if you had did it with each other that night because let's be honest, Christmas sex is freaking awesome."

Randy slapped Kelso over the head and said, "Shut up Kelso!"

AN: Sorry for the long delay, but this chapter was though to write and I have been extremely busy. Thanks for waiting, reading, and reviewing.