Chapter 12: Disaster Wedding!

(H/D wedding is a biggest disaster, except for E/J)

Place: Point Place Church (Chapel)

(October 17, 1980)

"Okay, nobody move anyone of these pillars or the whole set will fall down." Kitty said.

The church was still rather empty, since the wedding wouldn't be for another two hours. Red was sitting in one of the rows in the middle of the church watching Kitty and the rest of the church ladies do some last minute adjustments. Red was feeling good today because he was excited for Steven and Donna's wedding. It also helps that not many people were invited to the wedding. Red knew they did that for him, and he loved it.

Red was also a little sad, because he knew this meant that the kids were finally moving out, since Eric and Jackie were not that far along too. Don't get it wrong, Red was happy that he will have the house and Kitty all to himself. However, even though he would never admit it, Red knew he would miss the kids. Hell, he even considered those six to be his children, even Fez. Red smiled, he was basically their father. He gets upset when they are being dumbasses, he got proud when they succeed and he got upset when they were depressed, he helped teach them important life lessons, and he would run through a wall for them if they were in trouble. Red knows that someday he will go down to that basement and his kids will not be there, and the house will seem very empty. Until then, he will enjoy those kids… and torture them a little.

Red was pulled out of his thought with a familiar voice, "Hey There! Hi There! Ho There!"

Red turned to see the smiling father of the bride standing right next to him.

Red put his emotionless expression on his face and emotionlessly said, "Hey Bob."

Bob happily said, "Isn't this exciting? My little girl is going to get married."

Red got out of the pew, grinned a little, and said, "Yeah, I know Bob, and again, congratulations."

Bob said, "And congratulations to you too, Red."

Red looked at Bob confusingly and said, "What?"

"Look, I know that I haven't always been the most attentive father, and I know you and Kitty did a lot in helping raise my fine little girl into a mature woman." Bob said, while tears started to form in his eyes.

Red looked a little peeved at Bob and said, "Bob, I swear to god that if you start crying I'll put my foot up your ass!"

Bob chuckled a bit and said, "Red that never gets old."

Red chuckled too and said, "Well, as long as it still works, I'll keep on using it."

There was a small moment of silence, before Bob said, "Can you believe it Red? We've been neighbors and friends for over sixteen years."

Red sighed and said, "I know, and I regret every minute of it."

Bob chuckled, before another voice said, "There's the future mayor of Point Place."

Red and Bob turned around to see nicely dressed William Barnet walking towards them.

"I haven't won yet, Barnet." Red said humbly.

William shook Red's hand and said, "Not according to what I've heard. You're leading in polls by sixty-two percent."

Red smiled and said, "And it's all thanks to you, Bob, my family, the kids, and that hippie."

Will smiled and said, "No matter how good of a support a candidate has, if he is awful he will never win."

Bob interjected saying, "Yeah, look how you did at the debate last week… You killed that dirt bag Johnson."

Will chuckled and said, "I have never seen a man a white man sweat like that in my life."

Red chuckled as well and said, "I haven't seen a man look like that in a long time."

Bob was also chuckling and said, "When was that?"

Red was smiling, while saying, "Well it was one time when I was about to kill this one Korean commie."

Suddenly it got awkwardly silent.

To get out of the silence, Will said, "Well the service starts in an hour and a-half."

Red said, "And you two will get to be in-laws."

Will shook his head and said, "You'll be an in-law too."

Red put his hand up and said, "Oh no, I'm not a parent of these two children, you two are."

Bob quickly interjected, "Red, I just told you that you and Kitty did a lot in helping me raise Donna."

Will added on to that by saying, "And you and Mrs. Foreman practically raised Steven. Plus, if wasn't for your help, I would have never known about Steven. Which reminds me, I was just in the Bachelor's dressing area. Steven told me to tell you and Mrs. Foreman he want the both of you to sit in parents' pews for the ceremony."

Red rolled his eyes and said, "Stop pulling my leg, Barnet."

Will said, "I'm serious, Red. Steven thinks very highly of you and he admitted to me that you have been a more of father to him than anybody. He doesn't know where he would be without you."

Red started to get choked up about this. He couldn't believe that Steven thought of him like that.

Bob started to notice that Red was getting teary eyed and said, "Red, are you crying?"

Will looked confusingly at Bob and said, "Of course he's crying Bob, haven't you seen a grown man cry?"

"I just never thought that it was possible for Red to cry. Now, I'm starting to cry too." Bob said, with tears coming out of his eyes.

Red started to wipe the tears off his eyes and said, "Damn it, Bob, I told you not to cry!"

Bob said, "But I thought it would be okay since your crying too."

Red still tearing, said, "Bob, I'm not crying, I just got something in my eyes!"

Bob said, "Red, I think you're crying."

"Shut up, Bob! If you don't stop saying that I'm crying I'll put my foot up your ass!" Red shouted.

Place: The Maid of Honor's Changing Room

Jackie was looking at herself in the mirror and couldn't believe how pretty she looked. She knew that it wasn't pretty enough to out stage Donna, since that would be extremely rude. It would out stage anybody else that was at the wedding.

Jackie could not believe that Donna was getting married, and married to Steven no less. It only seemed like yesterday that she was dating Steven, and Donna was dating Eric. Jackie thought of how stupid she was back then, believing that she would marry Steven when they were totally wrong for each other. Jackie knew that she needed someone different from Steven. Not that there was anything Steven wrong with him, but they were not right for each other romantically. He was more of a quiet and less involved lover, which is not what Jackie needed. She needed someone more attentive and more romantic than Steven. At the beginning of their relationship, Jackie thought that Steven would eventually change and become the man she needed. However, Jackie learned the hard way that you should not love somebody because you want them to change but because of who they are.

Eric was the man she need, and she was very happy with him. With wedding going on around her, Jackie started to feel anxious about asking Eric when they would marry. However, Jackie had been holding back those questions because every time that she started to ask those questions with Michael and Steven the relationship went downhill.

Jackie heard the door open behind her, so she turned around and saw her nerdy lover. He was in his tux and she thought he looked hot.

Eric in awe, said, "Wow, you look really beautiful, Jackie."

Jackie blushed completely and said, "Eric, you don't have to be so nice."

Eric got closer to Jackie and said, "I'm serious, you look so beautiful."

As they held each other's hand, Jackie said, "Thank you, Eric. You look really hansom."

They stood there for a second staring at each other's eyes.

Eric gave his signature cocky grin, and said, "Let's do it."

Jackie, shocked, said, "Right now?"

Eric said, "Yeah, right now."

Jackie said, "But Eric we have to be ready for the wedding."

Eric looked at his watch and said, "It won't start for another hour."

"But it will take me, twenty minutes to get this dress back on." Jackie said, trying to throw out excuses because she actually wanted to also do it right now.

Eric wrapped his arm around Jackie's waist and said, "I promise, that we won't make it that long."

Jackie, who was obviously trying her best to not to give into her desires, said, "I don't know."

"Jackie, I can tell that you want to, so why don't you let me take that gorgeous dress off and make sweet love with you." Eric said, as he put a romantic kiss on her cheek at the end.

With that note, Jackie gave in and said, "Ok, but it has to be fast."

Eric started to unzip Jackie's dress and said, "Don't worry; we'll be by the time it starts."

Place: The Church's Chapel

(An hour and five minutes later)

Hyde wanted to kill Foreman right now. The idiot was holding up Hyde's big day. Hyde had to stand in the front of a church while Eric was doing god knows what. That was not the only problem. Midge was also not there yet and Leo was nowhere to be seen.

Kelso, one of Hyde's groomsmen, said, "Wonder what Foreman's doing?"

Fez, Hyde's other groomsmen, said, "Maybe he found a lost dog outside and decided to return it to its owners. Once he returned the dog to its owner, he decided to stop at the Hub and get some water."

Hyde said, "Fez, that's a stupid idea."

Kelso interjected, "I don't know, Fez might have a point."

The doors suddenly opened up and Eric came running in. Eric made it to the front of the chapel quickly.

Hyde looked at Foreman and angrily whispered, "What the hell was taking you so long?"

Foreman said, "Well, you see…"

Then the church organ started playing 'Here comes the bride' and the church doors opened up revealing the Bride's group. The first two bride's maids went in and then Jackie went through the doors. Jackie's hair was a little messed up and the dress was a little uneven.

Hyde knew what had happened and said, "You had sex with your girlfriend before your best friend's wedding?"

"BURN!" Kelso yelled, and drew the attention of the entire church, which was looking at the Donna.

Hyde put his hand to his face knowing that this wedding was going to be the biggest disaster.

Actually most of the wedding went smoothly up until one point.

"May we have the rings?" Pastor Dave said.

Hyde looked to Foreman, who instantly went to his front pocket. Foreman looked at his pants and realized they were on backwards. Donna and Hyde saw this too, and chuckled a little bit.

Eric looked at the couple and whispered, "You'll never let me live this down will you?"

Hyde grinned and said, "Nope."

Hyde and Donna exchanged rings.

Pastor Dave said, "By the power invested in me by god and the state of Wisconsin, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may..."

Suddenly the doors opened again, and Midge walked in.

"Oh, I'm so sorry I'm late. My car broke down and I had to walk the rest of the way here. My feet are killing me." Midge said, as she leaned on one of the pillars.

Then the wedding stuff in the church fell down, and everybody went into complete chaos. However, two people did get out the back door.

Place: Vista Cruiser

Donna and Hyde piled into the car, and they were laughing there asses off.

"Did you see Kitty's face as the…" Hyde said.

"No, did you see my dad freaking about…" Donna said.

They continued laughing for a few minutes before Donna said, "That was the greatest wedding ever!"

Hyde turned on the ignition and said, "Where to now Donna?"

Donna said, "To our honeymoon in Hawaii."

Hyde said, "To our honeymoon in Hawaii."

"We're going to Hawaii? I can't wait to go man!" Leo said, as he rose up from the back seat of the Cruiser.

AN: Hoped you all liked this chapter. I am sorry for the length that it takes me to put up chapters, but I have been working on other ideas and been busy. I would like to let everybody know that there is likely one more chapter left. Can't wait to finish this story up so I have a completed story in my column.

My apologies to those J/H shippers about the bashing in the middle but that is what I thought would probably be going through Jackie's mind at that moment.

I hope to have this story done by this week.

Keep on reading,

Der Schatten