I hope you like this one, please review.

BPOV

"You okay?" Jasper asked. Today was the day we were going to buy things for my baby, My Avery. Of course we already had a few things for her some clothing and toys but we still needed a lot more. Charlie and Emmett are in charge of painting her room (with Rose supervising of course) and Esme, Jasper and I were off to buy everything that is needed. All I wanted to do was be alone, to crawl up in bed all alone.

"I'm fine, I just don't get this problem I wanted to understand it before we left," I slid, the book over to him hoping that he would just tell me the answer.

"That's a tough one." Jasper said looking over the problem then handing me back the book. "Why don't you leave it and come back to it tonight."

"How about you just tell me how to solve the problem and we go," I said smiling.

"You have to work it out I am not going to be in your exam, telling you all the answers," he flashed me a sarcastic smile. We had been very snippy with each other over the last couple of days; thanks to a lack of sleep with all the stress associated with moving, a baby and my final exam there was no time for a full night's sleep.

"Or you could just tell me," I didn't see why he couldn't just give me a push in the right direction.

"Okay, if you still can't solve it when we come back I will tell you the answer," damn him for being so rational and logical.

"Fine, but I need to pee before we go," I said as he helped me up. All the new born babies I had seen were so tiny but I was huge there was a slight possibility that I'm going to give birth to an elephant. It was getting hard to get up by myself and when I lie down it is just like a turtle stuck on their back unable to get up.

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"Does she really need designer clothing?" Esme was holing up a Chanel, or Gucci t-shirt, we couldn't afford half of what was in the store. Well I couldn't afford anything in the store.

"But it is so cute let me buy it for her," Esme said smiling.

"But I am pretty sure that she won't know that it is designer shirt," I knew that I was being a bitch but I couldn't stop myself.

"I just wanted to do something nice," she said looking sad.

"That doesn't mean you have to spend $100 on a baby shirt," I said crossing my arms.

"I am not going to get it then," she said sweetly putting it back in the shelf.

"Bella I think we need to talk," Jasper said taking me by the arm and leading me to behind the cribs.

"Stop being a bitch, you may not care about this but she does," he was angrily pointing his finger.

"No, I get to be a bitch I have been uncomfortable for the last 5 months, she is constantly moving, my feet hurt and I need to go to the bathroom again. I am going to be the one that has to push her out and I think that gives me the right to decide what she is going to wear," I said storming out of the store and away from him.

I had hoped that it would have been Jasper that came after me I didn't want to look at Esme after I had been such a bitch.

"Bella, sweetie," Esme wrapped her cold arms around me. "Tell me what is wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong," this is the point that I would have gotten up and walked away from her but standing and walking were becoming difficult.

"Everyone goes through this Bella, I did but my husband wasn't as understanding as Jasper." She left it there within the long awkward silence I realised that I had been such a bitch I was going to be a mother I was going to have a baby of my own. Esme had once had this and she had lost it all and had tried to kill herself when her son died.

"My parent forced me to marry I didn't love the man and he hated me. Only using me for sex; he was a violent man losing his temper and blame it all on me. World war one saved me, as cowardly and as pig headed as he was he went to war and I was free. Every night I prayed as hard as I could that he would die, but he was a lucky one everyone congratulated me that he made it through but all I wanted to do was scream." I felt like a child getting a lecture I was feeling ungrateful for my family and she was trying to make me feel guilty. It was working.

"A few months after he returned I found out that I was pregnant," she placed he hands on my stomach. "My baby my boy gave me the courage to leave him, I packed up all my things and snuck away during the night."

"You went through this all alone?" I couldn't have imagined doing any of this without Jasper.

"I had my boy; he was sort of like Jasper every time I was feeling sad or alone he would move and I knew that everything would be okay," she said smiling sweetly.

"Avery did that the other day. What was his name?" I probably knew it but I was having such a hard time remembering.

"Jackson, he died of a lung infection five days after he was born," she said sobbing.

"I am so sorry Esme," I wrapped my arms around her. "I know that I am being a bitch but I don't think I will be able to handle this; God I don't even like children."

"It is different when it is your own; when she looks at you for the first time you know that you are her entire world. Believe me the first time you hold her there is nothing you will not do to protect her."

"Shouldn't I love her now, all I want to do is get her out so sleep on my stomach," Esme started to laugh.

"I am going to be a bad mother and you are laughing at me," she stopped instantly.

"You are not going to be a bad mother, baby" she said giggling again.

"I have never met a baby that liked me they all cried or pooped," it was the same child both time but that kid hated me.

"Bella you have no idea the bond that she will have with you when she is born. You are her everything like my children are mine, like you are your mothers," she said hugging me.

"Are you two done because I am getting weird looks standing all alone in the middle of a baby store all alone," Jasper said approaching us.

"I think we are," Esme said looking at me. I was going to be Avery's world she was going to look up to me for everything but as long as she loved me apparently I could do it all.

"Let's go shopping."

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We bought a million things, hundreds of pairs of socks tiny dresses and shirts, jeans. My baby had jeans, the cutest converse shoes you have ever seen, bears. A lift time supply of nappies and dummies, cd's that were meant to help the baby sleep. I feel in love with the most amazing crib, if I was a baby it is where I would want to sleep so my baby had to have it. Story books, changing table, breast pump (the thought of using it made me a little uncomfortable), a baby book that you got to fill in with all her important milestones.

Jaspers car was filled with baby things all ready to get into her new room.

"Here let me help you with that," Charlie took boxes off Esme being the gentle man he is however if he only knew that she could of carried the car up stairs without breaking a sweat.

"Did you buy enough? I don't think the room is big enough to fit all this crap" Emmett commented as he came back for his third trip.

"These are my daughter's things, none of it is crap," Jasper commented.

"I think some of it is crap dear brother. Like this what the hell is this?" he said holding up a box.

"It warms the nappy wipes," Esme said walking past carrying a mountain worth of stuff.

"And this?"

"That's a breast pump," Emmett looked disgusted. "My mother had six children and she didn't have pumps or warmers," he muttered as he walked away.

"I am going to go and try out our new bed, I am really tired," I told Jasper.

"You're not going to help us unpack all this," he questioned.

"I am just so tired," I said pouting. "Make sure they don't mess it all up."

"I love you," he called after me for the first time I didn't say it back.

I hope you like it, I didn't really feel this chapter but I tried my best. One more and Bella will go into labour I am really looking forward to writing that chapter I have all these idea swirling around in my head. Please review.