A/N: In know this update is looooooong overdue. The only thing I can do is apologize for the few months without update. Anyway, I'm back full time on this story now.

Part 3.3 – New York City

Ashley was nervous to say the least, she kept changing her outfit. Nothing she owned seemed good enough. Casual or not ? How was she supposed to dress ? She sighed furiously trying to ease the tension that had overcome her entire body. She had never felt like this in her entire life. Wrong, scratch that... She had felt like this before and honestly she hadn't liked it the first time. So why would she now ? She had felt this frustration after her first meeting with Spencer.

Ashley had wanted Spencer the first moment she saw her but Spencer was confused and didn't know what to do about the newfound information that she was into girls. That had irritated Ashley because she wasn't used to that feeling of wanting someone so much it actually hurt and so she tried to push Spencer. What a mistake it had been! Trying to kiss Spencer while playing with Aiden, what kind of dumbass does that ? Well, apparently Ashley Davies. Thankfully, Spencer had a brain and some common sense and had put a stop to it before it went any further. That would have been a big mistake. Her first kiss with her girl in front of a drooling idiot. No, their first kiss had been magical, in the privacy of her home and with just the two of them. Perfect, no other words could sum it up. The whole night had been perfect. Ashley started getting lost in her memories when she was rudely interrupted by Kyla calling her from the kitchen.

So, back to the task at hand, getting dressed. Ashley took a deep breath, it didn't matter what she wore. That wasn't what it was about. Before dressing to impress, she needed to see where all this was going. Ashley had never been so lost in her entire life. When she met Spencer all those years ago, she was nervous, but she had an objective in mind, a goal: Get Spencer, no matter what. Because when something like that comes along, you don't ask questions, you just go for it. Sure, there had been doubts and ultimatums given but in the end Ashley went for it and it had turned into the best thing that ever happened to her. But tonight was different, Ashley didn't know what she wanted, should she try again or should she leave it at that ? Maybe just be friends.... Ashley laughed at the thought. Like they ever could ! It was impossible, they had never been just friends and Ashley didn't think they could. They would always be more than that and it suited them fine.

Finally, Ashley decided that casual dressing was going to be fine, tight jeans and purple top. Simple, no need to impress. So, after changing one more time into a white tee and black sleeveless vest, she headed in the kitchen to help Kyla.

Madison arrived a little after 6pm and couldn't help but notice that Ashley was practically bouncing off the walls.

"Calm down, Ash. Everything will be fine." She chuckled.

"Easy for you to say, you're the one that scared me in the first place." Glared Ashley.

"Ok. Sorry about that. Spencer may have changed a little but she's still Spencer. You're not meeting her evil twin, so relax."

"And let me remind you that Spencer and I didn't part in the best of terms."

"So what ? She was perfectly friendly in the street earlier. She had 5 years to get over it." At these words, Madison cursed herself mentally for letting her mouth run without asking her brain for permission. She saw Ashley's face fall. "I didn't mean it like that Ash..."

"No, you're right. She's probably over me by now. Probably has a perfect girlfriend because let's face it, who wouldn't go after Spence. She's everything a girl could ask for."

"Ash, I'm sorry. I meant she had 5 years to get over her bitterness and anger towards you. And that's why she was perfectly friendly to you. Spencer always had a forgiving nature, especially with you. You always were her Achille's heel and I bet that hasn't changed at all."

Ashley smiled at Madison and sat back on the couch, deciding that Spencer would be here soon enough. There was no need to get all tensed up. But that was harder than she thought and by the time Spencer finally knocked at the door, Ashley had completely psyched herself out.

"This is a mistake." She whispered to Kyla before the girl got up to open the door.

"It's not. Stop being so damn negative all the time. You need this, she needs this. So stop being so scared for god's sake." Kyla said. Ashley's behavior was starting to get on her nerves.

Kyla opened the door to reveal a blonde goddess behind it, well at least to Ashley, that's what she was. The smile that was gracing Spencer's features sent butterflies in Ashley's stomach. Like she needed any more butterflies, she was perfectly fine with the ones already there. Kyla hugged Spencer, followed by Madison. Ashley had one moment of panick when she saw Spencer moving towards her. She looked at Kyla who was mouthing something to her but Ashley couldn't decipher what she was saying. That's when everything inside her started to calm down and the fear that had invaded her body was slowly retreating. She made her way towards Spencer. A hug would do, but slightly less awkward than the one they shared in the street earlier that day.

As she hugged her girl, Ashley took her time to relish in it. She had missed having her arms around Spencer. As a couple, they were both very touchy feely always having their hands on each other. That's the way they communicated most of the time. She felt Spencer tighten her grip on her but it was so subtle that she couldn't say if it was real or her imagination playing tricks on her. As their eyes locked, Ashley just knew that it hadn't been her imagination. The emotion reflected in Spencer's eyes was real and Ashley felt a little relieved that she hadn't completely lost her ability to read Spencer.

As the night went on, Ashley definitely saw what Madison had been talking about. It's not that Spencer was different, it's just that the girl was more confident and it could be seen in the way she talked and even in the way she moved. And it made sense after all. All those years with Ashley, Spencer was always the more reserved one, more discreet somehow. But it was mainly because of Ashley's outgoing personality. Ashley always attracted more attention, she was more outspoken and in comparison, Spencer always seemed quiet and reserved.

And Ashley definitely liked this new side of Spencer. At times during the evening, she saw a little bit of the old Spencer, especially with some of the looks they exchanged. It gave Ashley hope somehow that after all Spencer hadn't completely changed. Kyla had been her usual self, asking questions after questions while Ashley had been mostly quiet, listening to Spencer's answer, interjecting once in a while. She had learned that Spencer was in New York because a friend of hers who owned a gallery wanted to expose some of Spencer's photos, to which Spencer had agreed. She had learned many things about Spencer's trip around the world, and she also learned that Spencer was also much more relaxed, almost zen-like. Spencer had always been a planner, not wanting life to surprise her, but now she was more into a "Carpe Diem" type of life.

After dinner, while the girls were chatting away, Ashley used this opportunity to escape on the balcony, needing some fresh air. She was glad that Spencer was back into her life, but it was definitely more painful than she expected. She knew it would be, but she didn't how much it would actually hurt. And apparently, it hurt more than not having her at all in her life. And now, she had the feeling that she had thrown her life away by breaking up with Spencer even if she knew she had done it for the right reasons. Shaking her head, trying to chase those thoughts away, she heard the glass doors open and without looking, she knew it was Spencer.

"Hey." Spencer said quietly

"Hey back!" Ashley answered, smiling.

"What are you doing here ?"

"Oh, you know getting some fresh air."

They locked eyes and one thing was certain, Ashley saw no bitterness or anger in Spencer's eyes and that's one thing she had been afraid of. That Spencer wouldn't forgive her for what she had done 5 years ago. She only saw understanding in Spencer's eyes and that made her heart jump in happiness. A couple of minutes passed while the girls remained silent, next to each other.

"It's weird, isn't it ?" Spencer finally said.

"Yeah. Meeting you today was the last thing I expected." Ashley chuckled.

"That's why you're being so quiet."

"Probably. It's just, you know, so much to take in. To be honest with you Spence, I don't even know where to start."

"I know what you mean. Don't think it's easy for me, because it's not. I may be as lost as you are."

"I don't know, you seemed quite talkative back there." Ashley laughed.

Spencer playfully slapped her arm, "Well, with Kyla asking me all those questions, it would have been rude to remain quiet. Plus, it's easier with her. I don't have as much history with her as I have with you."

"She hasn't changed, has she ?" Ashley said.

"Nope, she's still the same bubbly girl she was back in high school." Spencer laughed.

A comfortable silence settled again between them as Ashley took in a seat in one of the chairs. Looking inside, she saw that Kyla and Madison were cleaning up the table and when Kyla caught Ashley's eyes, the younger girls gave her two thumbs up. Ashley shook her head, chuckling softly.

"But you have." Suddenly said Spencer.

"Have what ?" Ashley answered a little bit confused.

"Changed. I can see it. You seem more grounded."

"I like to think that I am, that I have learned from my mistakes."

"You definitely seem like it, anyway."

"I'm not the only one who has changed. I like this new side of you. You definitely seem more relaxed."

"Well, what can I say. I also learned from my mistakes."

Another bit of silence seemed to have taken over once again, but it wasn't uncomfortable. On the contrary, it was peaceful.

"Spence..." Ashley said after a while.

"Not tonight, Ash." Spencer answered, knowing exactlly what was in Ashley's mind. If Ashley still remained able to read Spencer, it was the same for Spencer. She knew at the tone of Ashley's voice where this was going. "Let's just enjoy this." She said. "We'll talk, I promise. Just not tonight."

"Ok." Said Ashley nodding in understanding.

"So, when are you going back on tour ? I heard the last one was interrupted."

"In a couple of months, we're starting with London. And you, when are you leaving the country again ?"

"Well, I do have one small assignment that will take me to Iceland in a couple of weeks for three weeks, after that who knows ?

"You definitely have changed. That is so not like you, the not knowing part."

"Yeah, well I learned to deal with it. At the beginning, it wasn't easy, but I managed. I do get to see some extraordinary things and meet extraordinary people."

"You look happy." Just said Ashley. She said it so softly, it was almost a whisper.

Spencer remained quiet, not really answering partly because she didn't know if she was truly happy. Sure, she was living her dream, but was she happy ? Inside, she always felt like something was missing. While she knew what it was, she never admitted it to anyone out loud.

"So, what's up with the bike ?" Ashley laughed, trying to change the subject. "Because Spencer Carlin on a bike, that threw me off a little, I have to admit. You used to hate those things, if I remember correctly."

"Courtesy of Mr Dennison." Spencer smiled.

"Aiden ?" Ashley said surprised.

"Yes. A few years ago, I was in San Francisco and he taught me how to ride." Spencer said, her voice shaking a little at the memory. She had been there after Ashley had broken up with her. At first, she was with her family but they were treating her as if she was made of glass and she had been getting sick of this, so she packed her bags and headed up to California and ended up on Aiden's doorstep. She had spent a couple of months with him and he managed to get her back up on her feet. It took time, but Aiden never gave up, forcing her to go out and meet people. "And after that, I decided to get my license and bought that bike at an auction."

"Well, remind me to thank him." She smiled.

"Why is that ?" Spencer asked with a smirk.

"Because you look damn hot on that thing." Ashley answered with a smirk of her own.

"And that's the Ashley we all know and love." Spencer smacked her playfully.

After this, the girls went back inside and finished the night with Kyla and Madison. After their small talk, Ashley seemed a little more at ease.

Spencer left an hour later with Madison.

"So, what did you guys talk about ?" Kyla asked Ashley as soon as both girls were out the door.

"Nothing much..."

"What do you mean, nothing much, you spent half an hour with her alone ?" The tone that Kyla used wa snot lost on Ashley and she knew exactly what her sister was trying to do.

"Kyla, we just started reconnecting, I'm not going to push her into something that she's not ready for. Hell, something I'm not even ready for."

"But.."

"No but, Ky. Stop pushing for something that may not happen at all. I know you want me back with Spencer, but things are very complicated. It's been 5 years, what did you expect ?" Ashley said a little aggravated by her sister's pushy behavior.

"Don't be mad."

"I'm not mad. But I know where you're going with this. And it's too soon, way too soon." Kyla nodded in understanding.

"Plus, I don't know if you're aware of this, but there is one subject we have been avoiding all evening." Ashley said suddenly.

"What do you mean ?" the younger brunette asked, a little confused.

"Nobody even asked Spencer if she was still single ? And Spencer didn't ask me either. As far as she knows, I could have someone and same for her."

"But you don't have anyone." Kyla said.

"Yeah, but Spencer doesn't know that." Ashley just said. Although, she had a feeling that Spencer didn't inquire about her status for the same reasons Ashley didn't ask about hers. The answer to that question could be hurtful in more ways than one.

"Anyway, are you planning to have her back in your life full time ?" Kyla asked hopeful.

"We're taking things slow. I'm meeting her tomorrow for coffee, and she's taking me to her place to see some of the pictures she plans to expose."

Kyla smiled at this news. Both girls were willing to give it a shot. At least in the friendship department. Now, it was only a matter of time, because she knew the chemistry those two had. She had witnessed it for years, had envied it so much and now that they were back in each other's lives, it was unthinkable to Kyla that they wouldn't get back together.