A/N: Because my beta is made of pure awesome you get two chapters in one night.. I now present the BIG BAD!

Songs for this chapter.. may or may not fit but got me in the mood

Goodbye -Secondhand Serenade , let this go -Paramore, That's what you get- Paramore, nothing like you and I- The perishers, now it's done Straylight Run, Dashboard Confessional- Best Deceptions, Glen Hansard - Falling Slowly

I DO NOT OWN

BPOV

"Bedroom, Edward. Let's go to the bedroom."

I started to push him off me so I could stand. He stumbled clumsily off me and held out his hand to help me stand. With a small tug, he pulled me to my feet and to his chest, wrapping his arms around me and burying his face into my neck. I could feel his warm, moist lips leaving a trail of heat on my skin, and a small moan left my mouth.

Once Edward heard that, he started moving us back blindly towards my bedroom, his body never leaving mine. His lips were molded to me, always touching some part of my skin and setting it on fire.

We stumbled down to my room, finally, and I felt the wind being knocked out of me as he slammed me up against my closed door. I felt his hands drag down my sides, past my hips to my thighs. He gripped them tightly, and I used the door as leverage as I pulled my legs up and around his waist. I could feel him pressing against my core. The fabric of my dress and the skimpy lace panties Alice had bought me were all I had covering me.

I felt him grind his hips into me, and I bit my lip and closed my eyes, relishing in the sensation.

"I want you, Bella," Edwards said in a low growl.

He crashed his lips into mine again, begging for entrance and the kiss deepened. I released my grasp on him with one arm, and reached down trying to turn the door knob. He noticed what I was trying to do and he grasped the handle himself and pushed the door open before he returned to ravishing my mouth.

Once again, he started moving. This time a little more awkwardly, seeing as how he was carrying me.

His knees hit my bed and he leaned over, letting my back come in contact with the mattress. I released my legs from around his waist and let them dangle off the edge of the bed.

Edward was hovering above me, supporting himself with one arm balancing by the side of my head. His other hand was at my cheek. He was looking into my else and smiling a languid smile. He slowly began to trace his fingers down my cheek to my neck. He continued down to my collar bone where he moved to trace the skin between my breast that was left exposed by the 'V' cut of my dress. I was trembling from his touch and my breathing was uneven.

He ducked his head down placing sweet kisses on the place that he had just touched. I wrapped my fingers through his hair, holding him there, enjoying the feeling of his warm mouth so close to my breast.

He began to kiss his way back up my neck to my mouth, deepening the kiss and allowing more of his weight to press into me as he used the arm that was supporting him to now move down my hips, then coming in contact with my thigh. I felt him brush the material of my dress aside, so his warm hands were now massaging the sensitive skin.

His hand started to move higher, finally coming to the crease where my leg met the place that was screaming for his touch.

I stopped breathing.

I felt Edward's warm breath blow across my neck as he whispered, "Breath, Bella," into my ear. I let out the breath that I had been holding as I felt his finger slowly dip under the lace panties. He slowly moved his fingers up and down against the skin he was now touching. I couldn't take it anymore.

"Edward…please…" I choked out.

He brought his lips to mine once again in a deep kiss as I felt his finger slide into me. At first, he just moved them from top to bottom teasing me, lightly grazing the bundle of nerves that were now throbbing for his touch. I moaned into his mouth and my back arched off the bed when I felt him slide of his long fingers slowly in and out.

My body shook as he entered another finger and began to pump them faster in and out. His thumb rubbed gentle circles, causing my stomach to clench. I could feel myself about to burst, and it wasn't long before my walls clamped down on his fingers as he curled them and kissed me, bringing me over the edge. I bit my lip as I dug my fingers into his back, pulling him as close to me as possible as I rode out the amazing feeling he had given me.

Once my body had relaxed some from my release, Edward kneeled down and started to kiss my knee and up my thigh. As he moved up, I could feel him pulling the fabric of my dress up as he went.

He reached my hip and placed tiny kisses there as he made his way to kissing my stomach. I lifted my hips to allow him to move the dress further up. Once he reached below my breast, I sat up and he pulled the dress over my head throwing it to the side.

"You're so beautiful, Bella…so beautiful," He said as his eyes looked over my body.

I bit my lip and ran my hands down his chest to the hem of his shirt. I took a deep breath and started to pull it up and over his head, throwing it in the same direction as my dress. I traced the indentations of his abs, down to the top of his pants where my fingers came into contact with the cold metal button. With my hands trembling, I unbuttoned it as fast as I could, pulling them down as far as I could until he took over and kick them off the rest of the way. The pair of grey boxer briefs that he wore hung low on his hips and were straining in his present state.

He brought his hands up to cup my face again, and leaned down to kiss me as his hands trailed to my back where I could feel him unclasp my bra. The straps fell down my shoulders, and he tugged them until it was completely off and threw it to the side.

I scooted back on the bed towards the headboard and I laid down and closed my eyes for a moment. I couldn't believe this was happening. I always dreamed about this, but never thought it would come true.

I felt the bed sink some, and I opened my eyes to see Edward now laying beside me on his side. I flipped to my side to face him, pulling him to me so that I could kiss him again. His hands were on me again in an instant and he broke the kiss moving south down my neck to my chest. I moved so I was on my back again as me made his way to my breast, slowly kissing his way to the harden peak. I felt his tongue dart out and circle around my nipple before pulling it between his lips and sucking. My body writhed in pleasure and I bit my lip. His hand came up to gently massage my other nipple between his fingers. It was toomuch.I wanted him. No, I needed him.

Now.

"Bella, I want you…so bad." Edward slurred, lifting his head to look at me.

"Then take me. Now, Edward."

He smiled and started to kiss his way down to my hip. Once he reached the sides of my panties, I felt them being pulled down. I lifted my hips to allow him to pull them off fully.

He kissed his way back up my body, occasionally letting his tongue trail over certain sections. Once he made it back to my lips, he kissed me again and scooted himself between my legs. He took one of his hands and removed his last article of clothing, kicking the briefs off.

I had waited for this moment for what seemed like a eternity.

I felt him situate himself at my center and I was shaking. Ever so slowly, as I held my breath, I felt him guide himself into me and a gasp escaped my lips.

"Are you ok?" he asked sleepily.

I simply nodded as my eyes started to fill with water. Not so much from the tinge of pain I felt as my body adjusted to Edward, but from the feeling of pure joy of getting what I had wanted for so long; to be here with him like this. I had waited to be with him like this. I had never slept with anyone before. I wanted it to be with someone I loved, and the only person I had ever loved was him.

He wanted me.

"Are you ok?" he asked, wiping the tears that had escaped away sloppily. His hand felt like dead weight against my cheek, but I ignored it.

"Yes," I answered bravely.

After a few moments, he slowly pulled himself out, then pushed back in. My breathing started to pick up as the friction of him caused the knot to build again in my stomach.

Once we found a rhythm, I wrapped my legs around his waist allowing him to go deeper. I bucked my hips towards him, wanting as much of him inside me as I could get.

I ran my fingers through Edward's now damp hair, brushing strands out of his face.He leaned down and placed sweet kisses on my cheek and eye lids. With each thrust, the noises caused by the pleasure I was feeling grew louder and more frequent.

"You feel so good, Bella," Edward crooned through a grunt as his pace slowly picked up.

I was close to the edge. A few more thrusts, and I would be done for. I dug my fingers into his back in anticipation, meeting each thrust with a buck of my hips.

Two thrusts later, and I reached my release. Edward followed, pulsing inside me. He dropped his head onto my neck, and I brought my hands to the back of his head, running my fingers through his hair and placing small kisses on the side of his face.

We laid like this until we caught our breath. I could feel Edward slowly pull out and roll next to me. We laid on our sides, pulled close together, and staring into each other's eyes. He was rubbing small trails up and down my sides as I traced his lips with my finger in silence.

Edward's eyes closed and his breathing became heavy and even.

"I love you," I whispered, leaning forward and placing a kiss on his lips before I pulled the covers over us and drifted off into a blissful sleep.

EPOV

Pain.

Throbbing, unbelievable pain in my head.

My eyes started to flutter open, only to have me snap them shut when the bright light of the morning caused stabs of excruciating pain to pierce my eyes and head.

This sucks…

I took a moment to prepare myself for the full effect of the pain that would be caused by opening my eyes again, then slowly opened them. Once I got over the piercing pain, I was confused.

This was not my room.

After a quick survey of the room, and I noticed that I was asleep in Bella's bed.

What the hell am I doing in Bella's bed?

I pushed myself up into a sitting position and my head throbbed. I winced in reply.Too fast.

I suddenly became aware that I wasn't wearing any clothes. What the hell?

Why didn't I have any clothes on?

I looked around the room and I saw my clothes along with Bella's dress from last night scattered across the floor.

My stomach dropped.

Oh god, what did I do?

Bella wasn't here. I got up quickly and threw my clothes back on. I needed to find Bella. We had to talk. Now.

I left her room and went down the hallway hoping to find her in the kitchen or living room, but she wasn't there. I went to the front door and opened it to see if her car was here, and it wasn't. I would wait until she got back. I didn't want to call in case she was upset with me.

I sat on the couch and noticed the two shot glasses and the half empty bottle of tequila.

Fuck, Edward, what have you done you idiot?

I sat there rubbing my hands over my face and through my hair. How could I have fucked up this bad? I was trying to think of any other reason that I would be in Bella's bed naked. Nothing was coming to mind.

This was bad.

She was my best friend. My virgin best friend, and if I took that from her, she would never be able to forgive me. We haven't been as close as we normally were lately, and this was surely going to put any plans of fixing that on hold.

I started thinking about last night, trying to remember what had happened.

Tanya and I had a horrible fight. Over Bella. She was jealous, and I could tell. But there was no reason to be. I was in love with Tanya, and Bella was nothing more then my best friend; we didn't feel that way about each other. People always assumed that we were together because we were so close, but it wasn't like that.

I was drinking, and upset that Tanya wouldn't listen to me and told me that she couldn't be with me because she always felt like she came in second to Bella. It was so ridiculous. There was no need for a competition.

Bella had arrived home from her date and she saw that I was upset and came to talk to me. We started doing shots and talking like old times. Just being ourselves and laughing and…

Oh god.

I kissed her. I remember tickling her, trying to get her to tell me about her and Jake.One thing led to another, and we were kissing. She mentioned her bedroom, and we went back their together.

What have I done?

Her bed. Me kissing her, and pulling her dress over her head and removing her bra. Everything was coming back, and I had fucked up. We slept together. I slept with her; my best friend. This was bad. So very, very bad.

I was going to have to talk to Bella and tell her I was sorry. I couldn't believe this. I couldn't lose Bella. She was a huge part of my life, and I don't think there was anything we hadn't been through together. She means the world to me. I had to make this right.

I heard a car pull up and I jumped to my feet. Bella.

I ran to the door and threw it open. I needed to see her now to make sure she was ok.

But it wasn't Bella.

Tanya.

Her face was sad and she looked as though she had been crying. Her eyes were red and puffy.

"Tanya, what's wrong?"

"Edward," She ran up to me and threw her arms around me. "I'm so sorry! it was stupid of me to start that fight. I just care for you so much. I get jealous. Can you blame me?"

"There is no need to be jealous, Tanya.Bella and I have been friends since we were babies." Except for me sleeping with her last night, but I couldn't tell Tanya that. I had already hurt one person who is important to me today. I couldn't hurt another.

"I know, I can't help it though,"

"Here, come in," She walked into the house with her arm around me and we sat down on the couch.

"Edward, I just want to forget this fight ever happened. We belong together, and I'm sorry I acted like a spoiled brat. I just want to move past this minor set back."

"You don't have anything to apologize for Tanya, it was nothing."

How could I let her feel bad for a bit of jealousy, when I went and did the one thing she was worried about? The guilt was stabbing me in the chest, and I felt like I was going to be sick.

"Oh, Eddie!" Tanyacooed, throwing her arms around me. "I love you so much! Thank you for forgiving me!" She crashed her lips into mine.

Just then, I heard the front door open followed by a dull crash.

My head snapped towards the noise, and I saw Bella standing there, coffee cups laying on the ground, the brown liquid splattered all over the floor. Bella had one hand on the door and her other arm wrapped around her mid-section with a look of pure pain on her face.

"Bella," I said standing

"I-I..don't… I don't understand," Her chin was shaking and tears had already began to flow down her face. "I.. I thought…"

"Bella, we need to talk," I said walking towards her.

She shook her head back and forth, backing away from me.

"Bella, please…"

"I can't," She said sobbing. "Not after this; not after last night. I was so stupid to think that it meant anything to you. Of all people, you. I never thought you could do something like this to me. I was wrong,"

"Bella, it's not like that, you're my best friend…" Her scream cut me off.

"Shut up, just shut up! This is what you do to your best friend? I wouldn't do this to my worst enemy! I'm so sick to death of being your friend."

"Bella…"

"Go to hell, Edward." She turned to leave.

I ran after her, grabbing her arm. She spun around and started punching me in the chest and arms.

"Bella, stop!" I tried to hold her hands down.

"Let me go," She ripped her hands away.

"Please, can we just talk about this Bella?"

"I am done, Edward. Done."

"What do you mean?" I felt my stomach sink to my feet.

"I quit. I quit, and I am moving out. You want Tanya, have her." He tone was venomous .

"Bella, don't. We can work through this," I pleaded.

"No, we can't. I have waited for you to open your eyes for so long. I have dreamed of what happened last night so many times. I finally thought that I meant the same thing to you that you meant to me. I was wrong, I was nothing more then a drunken fuck until you made up with her."

"That's not it! About last night… I…"

"I don't want to hear what you thought about last night. Forget it ever happened. It's not like it meant anything to you, anyway."

She turned again and ran to her car, slamming the door and speeding out of the driveway.

I put my face in my hands and screamed.

I was never going to be able to fix this.

BPOV

The bright morning sun had brought me out of my sleep, which I was mad at. I had the most amazing dream last night and I didn't want it to be over.

I was pleasantly surprised to find out last night wasn't a dream.

Two arms were wrapped around me, and when I looked behind me I saw the sleeping face of Edward. I couldn't help the cheesy smile that played across my face.

I laid there replaying last night in my head, and couldn't believe it had finally happened. Edward and I had made love. Just thinking about it made my face blush. It was amazing. Better then anything I could ever think of.

I was so happy that Edward had been my first. I had always hoped he would be, but I never thought it would actually happen.

But here I am, laying in his arms after the most amazing night I had ever had in my life.

I laid there a little while relishing the feeling of his warm embrace.

I thought of the amount we both drank last night, and that he would probably wake up with a massive hangover. I thought I would be nice and run and get some of his favorite coffee.

I wiggled my way out of his grip, making sure not to wake him. I headed to my dresser and grabbed a hoodie, and a pair of jersey gaucho pants. I threw on a pair of flip flops, and put my hair in a ponytail. I looked myself over in the mirror in the bathroom and still couldn't removed the smile from my face. I was basically bursting out of my skin with happiness.

I walked back into the bedroom to see that Edward was still sound asleep. I searched for my purse, and found it in the living room next to the couch. I grabbed my keys and headed out the door.

I was driving and my cell phone rang. I dug through my purse until my hands came in contact with it. I pulled it out giving a quick glance at the caller ID to see that it was Alice.

"Hello," I said cheerily once I flipped it open.

"Bella?"

"Yes."

"Why are you sounding so happy…"

"Whatever do you mean, my beautiful Alice?''

"Ok, who are you and what have you done with my friend?"

"I have no idea what you are talking about, Alice."

"Spill it, Swan."

"Oh Alice, your never going to believe what happened!" I squealed in the phone. I had to tell someone.

I told Alice all the events of last night, not getting into detail but giving the basic gist of the events.

"Oh. My. God." was her response after a few moments of silence.

I had pulled up to the coffee place and was parked out front while I finished talking to her.

"Alice, it was perfect. I mean, more then I ever expected that would be. I mean, he wanted me! He started it, he kissed me.. I was in shock."

"I'm happy for you, Bella." she said "Does he know everything? How long you have been in love with him and so on?"

"No, I figured we can get into all that when he isn't feeling like crap. He has the next couple days off, so I am sure we will have a lot of time to talk."

"That's good, I'm glad you will finally be able to get it all out. It will be a huge weight off your chest."

"I'm counting on it," I smiled. "Well I'm going to let you go, I am going to get these coffees and get back to him."

"Aww, so cute." Alice teased.

"Yeah, yeah. Talk to you later."

"Bye Bella."

I hung up the phone and stepped out of the car heading inside the Starbucks. While I waited in line to get our coffees last night played over and over in my head. How his lips tasted, how his tongue felt on me, The weight of his body pressed into me, him making sure I was ok. I got goose bumps just thinking of it.

Once I had the coffee, I was back in the car driving home. I couldn't wait to spend the day with him. To talk over everything that I had been thinking the last few years.

This could really work.

I pulled into the driveway and my breath caught in my throat.

Tanya.

Her car was parked out front. What was she doing here?

I really didn't want to deal with her. Was she here begging for him to take her back? Wouldn't that be perfect.

I opened the door and what I saw in front of me cause the most excruciating pain I have ever felt to rip through my body. Immediately, my body lost all control and I dropped the coffees to the floor and clutched my stomach in order to try and hold my body together. My eyes started leaking as if I had been crying far hours.

In front of me was Edward and Tanya on the couch wrapped in each other's arms, their lips pressed together.

I didn't understand, he said they were over. He had made love to me.

Edward and Tanya's heads both snapped in the direction of me and while Edward looked like a deer caught in headlights, Tanya had a smile as wide as could be on her face.

"Bella," said Edward standing up from the couch.

"I-I..don't… I don't understand." there was a ripping sound coming from my chest and I thought I could actually hear my heart breaking. "I.. I thought…" Edward interrupted.

"Bella, we need to talk…" Edward said walking towards me.

I didn't want him anywhere near me. I started backing up towards the door.

"Bella, please…" he begged

"I can't," I chocked out. "Not after this, not after last night. I was so stupid to think that it meant anything to you. Of all people, you. I never thought you could do something like this to me. I was wrong."

How could I have been so stupid?

"Bella, it's not like that, you're my best friend…" You have to be fucking kidding me!

"Shut up, just shut up!" I screamed. "This is what you do to your best friend? I wouldn't do this to my worst enemy. I'm so sick to death of being your friend." So sick!

"Bella," he face was sullen

"Go to hell, Edward." I didn't want to hear this. I turned around to leave.

I felt Edward grab my arm and spin me around. All the anger and hurt and rage I felt was reaching an all time high and I started to punch him. I wanted him to hurt, to feel pain like the pain he was putting me through. But I would never be able to make him feel anywhere close to what this felt like. Because it hurt to the point of being numb.

"Bella, stop!" He attempted to stop the attack

"Let me go!" I ripped my arms away from him

"Please, can we just talk about this Bella?" He pleadded

"I am done, Edward. Done." I screamed

"What do you mean."

"I quit. I quit, and I am moving out. You want Tanya, have her." I couldn't stay here with him, not after this. I couldn't see him everyday, and feel humiliated while I watched him and Tanya, While I slept in the room where it happened.

"Bella, don't. We can work through this…" he begged

"No we can't. I have waited for you to open your eyes for so long. I have dreamed of what happened last night so many times. I finally thought that I meant the same thing to you that you meant to me. I was wrong, I was nothing more then a drunken fuck until you made up with her." I was going to be sick at how right I probably was.

"That's not it, about last night… I.." I cut him off

"I don't want to hear what you thought about last night. Forget it ever happened. It's not like it meant anything to you anyway." I didn't need to hear him tell me I was a mistake, that he regretted it. I know he did. I could read it on his face.

I turned around not being able to handle anymore of him talking, and got him my car and peeled out of the driveway.

I had to stop once I was far enough away from the house because I couldn't see. The sobs that rocked my body were uncontrollable and I beat my fist on the steering wheel as I screamed. I wanted to hit someone.

I dug through my purse finding my phone and dialed Alice.

"Hello?"

"A-Alice.. I..I need you to come g-get me."

"Bella, what wrong, where are you."

"P-Please, Alice."

"I need to know where you are, sweetheart." She sounded so worried. I heard her scream for jasper. "Bella, take a deep breath and calm down. I need you to tell me where you are.. I will come I just need to know where."

I took a few deep breaths before I was able to get out a full sentence and let her know where to find me.

Once she told me her and Jasper were on their way, I threw the phone on seat and put my head on the steering wheel and let the sobs to reclaim my body.

Soon enough Alice was ripping the car door open and pulling me into an embrace.

"Bella what the hell happened?" She asked I could see Jasper standing behind her, his face full of worry.

"He took her back Alice. He slept with me and he took her back."

"WHAT!" Alice screamed

"I wasn't good enough, I'll never be good enough." I moaned through my tears.

"Bella, I am going to fucking kill him." Alice growled

"I quit. I told him I wasn't living there anymore. I came home from coffee and she was there and they were kissing."

I could feel her stiffen.

"He didn't want me, Alice. What's so wrong with methat he didn't want me?"

"Bella ,Nothing. It's him, he's the ass, Bella."

She rocked back and forth with me sobbing into her neck and rubbing circles on my back until I was calmed down long enough for her to be able to drive me back to her house. Jasper drove their car, he gave me a quick hug before taking off back home.

The entire car ride we drove in silence the whole time all I could think was that I wasn't good enough for him, everything Tanya had said was true.

He didn't want me, he could never have wanted me.

The pain ripped through me again and I clutched my stomach trying to control it.

I would never be whole again.