A/N: Just responding to that question that almost all of you have asked, yes there will be swanqueen interaction. I don't think I can write OUTA fic without it.
XxXx
"How's my pillow princess?" Emma grinned as she slipped into a booth across from Kathryn. The other women immediately went scarlet and looked down at her scrambled eggs.
"I'm good," Kathryn mumbled.
"No aches or pains?" Emma was still grinning. She was slightly concerned because she hadn't been able to see how much lube Regina used or how far she penetrated Kathryn.
"No, should there be?" Kathryn asked with trepidation.
"No," Emma said waving to get Ruby's attention "but if we do more you might feel a little..." Emma hesitated. It was hard trying to describe that empty used but amazing feeling after really good anal. "...bottomed out."
"Hey, Emma, what can I get for you?" Ruby popped up with a smile.
"Just coffee and a breakfast bagel to go," Emma ordered. Kathryn was looking thoughtful and like she had a million questions. "I'm a little wired from last night," Kathryn's had shot up in alarm. Emma had to stifle a laugh. "I was working the night shift."
"Yeah," Ruby frowned sympathetically "that totally sucks. The sooner you get a deputy the better. Just one request though," Ruby leaned forward with a salacious grin. "When you get him, can you make him at least as hot as the old sheriff? There is so little man candy in this town. The night shift is long when you got nothing pretty to look at, right sheriff?"
"Right, Ruby," Emma nodded. Ruby grinned and bounced away.
"Man candy?" Kathryn quoted.
Emma shrugged "it's true, there's very little to look at. Not that I plan on doing more than looking."
"If you have someone you're interested in..." Kathryn squeezed Emma's hand before pulling back nervously. She looked around the diner and continued on with a lower voice. "You shouldn't let Regina and I stand in your way."
"Trust me," Emma shook her head. "You're more than enough right now. If I get struck by the love bug then you guys will be the first to know. So, you enjoyed last night?"
"More than I thought I would," Kathryn confessed with a blush.
"You want to do it again sometime?" Emma coaxed.
Kathryn bit her lip and nodded looking guilty. "Hey," Emma frowned "why are you looking so down about it?"
"It's just," Kathryn hesitated before sitting back and folding her hands together "it's just, it's not something that good girls are supposed to do. I can barely remember...doing normal-things, with David and now I'm engaged in-in well, us and doing things like that...if I'm not a good girl and I'm not a wife, if I'm not even straight anymore...who am I?"
Kathryn looked at her seeming lost and confused. Those were great big emotions and Emma wasn't even good with normal sized emotions. Emma sat back in her chair and wished she had something to occupy her fidgeting hands.
"Forget it," Kathryn muttered looking away. She got up to leave and Emma caught her hand. She wasn't good with this stuff but she did know that she shouldn't let Kathryn leave.
"Look, you're not a good girl," Emma tried her best to explain "you're not a girl at all, you're a woman. If you were a girl there is no way I would have done even a fraction of the things I've done to you," Kathryn blushed harder but Emma for once wasn't trying to make her. "You're all grown up Kathryn and in the real world there isn't such a clear line of 'good' and 'bad.' All's I know is that you enjoyed last night and no one was hurt. That can't be bad, right?"
"I guess," Kathryn sighed. It seemed like Emma had missed the real point.
Emma bit her lip and tried again. "You spent a lot of time being a good girl for your family. Being someone else's wife and now you have to figure out who you are. We kinda haven't helped by throwing a lot of change at you but it might be a good thing. People adapt quicker to stimuli or something. You have to find yourself and all that gap year crap, but you don't have to do it alone. Last night you found out a little about yourself by living out one of Regina's kinks. Why don't you think about it and next time we'll act out one of yours?"
"I don't have..." Kathryn protested.
Emma rolled her eyes. "Everyone has a kink or a fantasy. There's nothing you never had the courage to ask David to do? It might be as easy as sex in the shower or as out there as-as," and here Emma fumbled to think of something that was out of the ordinary but not so bazaar as to out her as a complete pervert. "-As role playing!"
"What are you guys talking about?" Ruby said her eyes lighting up with interest as she sat down Emma's order.
"Nothing!" Kathryn denied furiously.
"Oh, come on! The only people I get to talk to about that stuff is Ashley, who's on her honey moon and Mary-and that's not important. I'm girlfriendless!" Rubie bemoan slipping into the booth beside Emma.
"We were not talking about sex," Kathryn denied hotly.
Ruby seeing she would get no-where with the blonde turned to Emma. "Come on Sherriff, you're a big city slicker, I'm sure you have stories! I once dated a guy into furries."
"What?" Kathryn asked confused.
"No!" Emma clamped her hand over Ruby's mouth to keep in the enthusiastic explanation. "She doesn't need to know what that is," she told Ruby with her best Sheriff look. Dear God considering how shy Kathryn was in bed Emma didn't think she could handle the stranger aspect of that kink.
"Fine," Ruby grumbled affronted. "You guys suck."
"I'm going to go to work now," Kathryn eyed them warily as she left the booth.
Emma gave her a small wave goodbye before she turned to Ruby. Ruby looked grumpy and about ready to leave when Emma stopped her. "Furries? Really? And you went along with that?"
Ruby grinned and sat down eager to share the details.
XxXx
"I'm bad at gay sex," Kathryn sighed still fully clothed and sitting in Emma's wicker chair.
Emma froze on her way to her bed. They were at her apartment after Henry's bedtime. Regina was grumpily folding her shirt and looking for a place to set it. She hated coming to Emma's because Emma wasn't as anal about dirt as she was. She could still see the floor under the discarded clothes and the trash, old take out cartons and cans mostly, was scattered about making it look messier than it was. But honestly calling her home a pig sty was a bit much.
"You're not bad at gay sex," Emma denied quickly.
Kathryn gave her a steady look. Emma wavered under it before she finally looked away and shrugged. "You're not bad...it's just a little harder than straight sex."
"I don't understand how you put up with me. You're both really good," Kathryn widened her eyes in emphases. "And since you won't touch each other, you're stuck with me and my bad gay sex..."
"Honestly," Regina said in her best comforting tone. Emma immediately became worried. "Since David was you're only teacher, you were probably bad at straight sex too and just didn't know it."
Kathryn's eyes widened as she thought about it then hid her head in her hands with a groan. Emma turned to glare at Regina. Regina glared right back not understanding that she was a total jackass.
"That's probably not true!" Emma said hotly then winced. "It's definitely not true."
Kathryn was shaking her head behind her hands. "No, she's probably right. I'm just terrible at sex!"
Emma slapped Regina on her bare stomach. Now look at what you've done, she thought irritated. Regina had taken off her blouse and unzipped her skirt. She didn't seem to realise that she had put their sex life in jeopardy. Regina rolled her eyes just as irate as Emma.
"You're not terrible at sex!" Emma said vehemently. "Regina and I have just had more experience-"
"-Much more, in Ms Swan's case," Regina scoffed.
"Really? You can't even let that go?" Emma asked in disbelief.
"She's right," Kathryn sighed and Emma turned to glare at her. "Not about you Emma!" Kathryn quickly added looking repentant. "About me. I was trying to think of a stupid fantasy and I couldn't even do that properly."
Emma's head tilted. That was a lie. "You're lying. You do have a fantasy."
"What?" Kathryn looked alarmed.
"There's something that get's you hot under the collar and you're not telling us about it," Emma continued with a grin.
"There is not!" Kathryn spluttered indignantly. It was obvious even to Regina now that she was lying.
"What is it?" Regina asked looking back and forth between Emma and Kathryn like Emma was a mind reader.
"Oh come on Kathryn, you already know about Regina's thing for asses and my oral fixation," Emma coaxed with a grin. "Tell us or I'll just have to guess and believe me, it's better for all of us if I don't go there."
"It's just," Kathryn started but then visibly chickened out. "It's nothing!"
"Honestly Kathryn there is nothing you could say that would shock Ms Swan or I. Between the two of us we've probably already done it," Regina said. Emma could see that the mayor was trying to be comforting. Unfortunately bringing up their superior experience and sexual history was probably the worst thing she could have done.
"You'll just laugh at me," Kathryn mumbled. She looked really small sitting in Emma's chair. "I'm terrible at sex so I'm probably terrible at fantasising. I don't want you to think I'm even more boring."
"If it makes you happy it will hardly be boring," Emma reassured her.
"Please Kathryn," Regina said softly. Kathryn looked at her and seemed to be comforted by what she saw in the mayor's face. Emma tried not to feel jealous.
"I-I," Kathryn bit her lip and stared at her hands folded in her lap. "I used to dream about meeting up with David in the woods, like he was a total stranger, a park ranger or something," Kathryn's face flushed and she wouldn't look at them. "I would be trespassing and he would threaten to call the police unless..." Kathryn shook her head and wouldn't continue.
Emma grinned. As fantasies went that wasn't bad, in fact it was probably typical of most housewives. They got the excitement and danger without the risk. "Do you say no at first before slowly giving in or does he force you?" She asked not attempting to keep the huskiness from her voice. She was glad that Kathryn wasn't looking at her because her smile was far too smug to be encouraging.
"He wouldn't take no for an answer. I used to imagine him calling me names," Kathryn's eyes darted to the side and if it was possible her face got even redder. "Bad names, shameful..." She frowned then sitting up straight. "But near the end of our marriage he really did start calling me those names and I didn't enjoy it at all."
"There's nothing wrong with doing that or saying those names, so long as you do it with someone you trust. David is an ass for turning it into something degrading," Emma said firmly placing her hand on Kathryn's knee.
"Oh, no," Kathryn shook her head. "I never told David about that fantasy. He wouldn't betray my trust like-" Kathryn stopped mid sentence and it was obvious that she suddenly remembered how David had betrayed her trust. She shook her head and looked away again. "Well, he wouldn't betray me like that anyway. I know it's not something I should want and it's, it's not something a decent woman should want-"
"That's crap," Emma rolled her eyes and gave Kathryn a reassuring smile. "Kathryn you're a good person, amazing really and having a fantasy doesn't make you bad."
Regina snorted and they both turned to look at her. Kathryn looked small and vulnerable and Emma looked like she was ready for murder. Emma sworn if Regina made Kathryn feel bad about this she was going to kill her. "Honestly Kathryn, you, bad? Not even on your worst day. I refuse to let you insult yourself," Regina's voice authoritative but she was trying to comfort Kathryn. Emma relaxed slightly since Kathryn usually responded to Regina's odd way of being nice. That was a mistake.
"Besides as far as fantasies go yours is pretty tame," Regina continued coming closer to run her hands through Kathryn's hair. "A little light rape fantasy and slut shaming is nothing compared-"
Emma watched Kathryn's face. She could actually see the destructive path Regina's words took as they shattered the comforting atmosphere. Kathryn's face that had finally lost its tension grew slack as the words were absorbed. Then her eyes grew wide and horrified as she finally comprehended what Regina had said.
"It's a non-con fantasy!" Emma snapped punching Regina in the arm, temporally digressing to a twelve year old. Of all the things Regina could have said to the proper Kathryn, 'rape' and 'slut shamming' where among the worst. Sure they where the correct terms to use on the scene but none of them where in a fetish bar or hook up.
"Ow!" Regina grabbed her arm more shocked and upset that Emma had physically hit her than hurt.
"I do not want to be raped!" Kathryn snapped standing up in an indignant fury. Her face was contorted in an angry scowl that Emma had never seen on the normally sweet woman's face. Kathryn snatched up her clothes shaking with rage. She glared at both of them and shoved Regina down on the bed as she stormed out. A few moments later the door slammed loudly.
Emma turned her head to slowly glare at Regina. She looked confused sprawled out on the bed in her underwear and heels. "You are the worst person talk to virgins with," Emma said slowly.
"Virgin? You know Kathryn is not a virgin," Regina glared back sitting up.
"A virgin to kinky sex!" Emma snapped. "This might come as a surprise to you but not everyone views sex as a power trip! Some people even have vanilla sex all their lives and are perfectly happy with that! Some even do this crazy thing called making love, which isn't about controlling the other person!" So she's heard.
"So, we're not having sex tonight?" Regina asked looking towards Emma's bedroom door as if Kathryn would come back in.
"Unless you plan on screwing me then no and fat chance that's happening sunshine," Emma glared flopping down on her bed and pulling her pillow over her face. She was going to scream!
XxXx
"I am so sorry about Regina," Emma said the next morning showing up at Kathryn's door with coffee and donuts.
"Rape is a terrible thing Emma," Kathryn glared at her from the doorway. She looked ready to slam it in Emma's face. "It shouldn't be glorified or mocked and it certainly shouldn't be someone's fantasy."
"You're totally right," Emma placated. Yes she agreed with Kathryn, rape was terrible and shouldn't be a joke. But a non-con fantasy wasn't about rape it was about control but Kathryn didn't seem in the mood to argue details.
"I don't want that," Kathryn said but seemed to relax as her grip on the door loosened.
"Regina's an asshole, I keep telling you that," Emma grinned trying to lighten the mood. "You should stop sleeping with her and chose me."
Kathryn's face fell and her hand slipped off the door limply. She moved back into the house to sit on the stairs. Emma followed her inside holding the coffee and donuts uneasily. "What are we?" Kathryn asked looking up at Emma with her big blue eyes. She looked exhausted.
Emma shrugged awkwardly.
"I keep asking you the big questions, huh?" Kathryn sighed smiling sympathetically. She stood up and took the coffee cup kissing Emma's cheek. "I'm sorry I keep making you hold my hand through all of this. It's not fair on you."
"We're having fun," Emma struggled to find a way to explain or define what was going on but that was all she really could come up with. Looking any deeper than that made her uncomfortable. "Maybe that's all that this needs to be for now, right?"
"Maybe," Kathryn gave her a brave smile. It would have fooled Regina but Emma had a fantastic BS detector but she let it go anyway. She had a feeling if she pressed Kathryn or herself for answers she wouldn't like what she found.
"So," Kathryn said in a lighter tone obviously trying to lighten the mood. "You never told me what you're fantasy is."
"I have an oral fixation," Emma looked at Kathryn smugly. "I thought you of all people would have realised that by now."
Kathryn blushed. "That's not a fantasy," she argued.
"Oh, look who's calling the shots now," Emma teased and then proceeded to divert the conversation onto safer ground.
XxXx
"-You're screwing Kathryn and Regina!" Mary-Margret's voice echoed all around Emma's apartment. Emma was so glad she decided to tell the teacher privately.
"You promised not to freak out!" Emma snapped.
"I lied!" Mary-Margret declared her eyes still wide with horror.
"It's not as if we're all together!" Emma defended hotly. With Kathryn constantly asking her hard questions about their odd relationship, Emma had finally felt the need to talk about it with someone else. Considering her only friends where a ten year old boy and the teacher, Mary-Margret won. In all honesty if Emma thought for one second Ruby could keep her mouth shut about this then she would have went to her. At least with the younger woman all she would have had to worry about was her asking to join in. Mary-Margret on the other hand came with a whole different bag of worry and judgements.
"Don't tell me how it works!" Mary-Margret pleaded. She even put her hands over her ears like a child.
Emma slapped her hands down. "Don't be an ass. I only became friends with Kathryn to help her through her divorce with David which is partly your fault."
"So you thought the best way for her to get over David was to get under you?" Mary-Margret snorted.
Emma glared and gave her a fake laugh. "Funny. Trust me, I won't be extending the offer to you if you and David ever goes south."
"Me and David are fine," Mary-Margret easily waved off her barb. "So how did this happen? And is Kathryn gay now? How come you didn't tell me you were gay? I mean I kind of thought-what with all the leather jackets and jeans but you have such nice hair, and weren't you and Graham-"
"Whoa!" Emma cut off Mary-Margret's rant. "First off, it just sort of happened and no, Kathryn is not gay. Neither is Regina or me and what the hell are you saying about my leather jackets?"
"Oh come on," Mary-Margret rolled her eyes. "You're pretty darn butch Emma. If you didn't take so long to do your hair you would totally fit the stereotype. And are you really telling me that you're having lesbian three way sex and none of you are gay?"
"I am not butch!" Emma snapped placing her hands on her hips and squaring off. She then looked down at her manly stance along with her badge and gun and slumped across the counter. "I do have nice hair," she conceded reluctantly petting her hair reassuringly. There was nothing wrong with leather jackets and jeans.
"Yes you do," Mary-Margret nodded drinking her tea as she sat on the other side of the counter in Emma's kitchen. "Now back to the non-gay lesbian sex."
Emma rolled her eyes. "I've had a lot of sex with men and women so I'm not a lesbian."
"You're bisexual," Mary-Margret nodded wisely.
"No," Emma shook her head awkwardly. "See, bisexual's do the whole, falling in love with the person not the gender. I'm just slutty, I pretty much sleep with anything with a pulse and now Regina. I fall for the body not the person."
Mary-Margret glared at Emma who shrugged and pushed away from the counter. It wouldn't be the first time someone judged her for her bedroom activities. Mary-Margret grabbed her hand. "Don't say that about yourself Emma. You're not a slut, you're worth more than that."
Oh, that hadn't been what she expected. Emma ran her hand through her hair and couldn't meet Mary-Margret's eyes.
"So, what about Regina and Kathryn?" Mary-Margret said sensing Emma needed to move on.
"Regina is probably the same as me. Kathryn however is straight. She's not even the wild straight girl that has lesbian sex to show how experienced and worldly she is before she settles down. She's just straight. Eventually she's going to dump us both when she starts to seriously look for someone to settle down with." Emma tried to laugh but stopped when Mary-Margret didn't join in.
"And you're okay with that?" Mary-Margret frowned.
"Kathryn deserves to be happy and that's not me or Regina," Emma said sadly.
"Why can't it be you?" Mary-Margret said sternly. "You have just as much right to be happy as Kathryn does."
Emma scoffed and rolled her eyes. "You're such a girl sometimes..."
"So?" Mary-Margret stood up and grabbed Emma's hand and dragged her to the couch in the living room. "We are going to sit down and talk like girls and get mushy and all that stuff. You're going to tell me everything that's going on with you and I'm going to fix it."
"Mary-" Emma started to protest but Mary-Margret smacked her on the forehead. Emma stopped talking to look at her with confusion.
"Shut it Emma, if you annoy me-I might just braid your hair too," Mary-Margret threatened.
Emma rolled her eyes but told Mary-Margret everything except the sexy bits. When Emma had stopped talking Mary-Margret sat back and seemed to digest everything. After a few moments Mary-Margret reached forward and hit Emma upside the head.
"Ow!" Emma flinched. She had to jerk back as Mary-Margret tried to hit her again. "What the hell?"
"You're a jerk Emma Swan!" Mary-Margret glared. "Did you honestly start sleeping with Kathryn because Regina was interested?"
"What? No!" Emma denied "I never said that!"
"You said you went after Kathryn when you realised that Regina wanted her," Mary-Margret looked like she wanted to slap her again. "You weren't even friends until you found out she was Regina's friend."
"That is not how it happened!" Emma stood up angrily. "Kathryn and I were friends. I just happened to get feelings for her around the time that I notice Regina might be my competition!"
"So you love Kathryn?" Mary-Margret asked snidely.
Emma's indignation came to a spluttering stop as she heard the question. She knew she didn't love Kathryn but she did care about her. The other woman was funny and nice and good, three things Emma wasn't and had always been drawn too. Ok, so she usually wanted to take all those good things and twist them until they were as bitter and broken as she was but she didn't want to do that with Kathryn. That had to count for something right?
"I didn't think so," Mary-Margret said smugly. "It sounds like you're using her to hurt Regina."
"What happened to you being supportive?" Emma blatantly ignored what she had said. She didn't want to think about that.
"That was before you were a jerk! Emma," Mary-Margret said more softly. "You really do deserve to be loved by someone who will love all of you because you're worth it." Mary-Margret's tone changed as the irritation in her voice took over. "But Kathryn is not some ping pong ball to be used in your game of one upping Regina!"
"I'm hardly one upping her if she's joining in on the sex," Emma defended herself.
"I'm not saying that you don't care for Kathryn in some way," Mary-Margret was trying her best to regain her calm. "But really Emma, if you don't care for her and think she's going to leave you at the first sign of a better prospect then why are you doing this? Do you really hate yourself that much? Or do you want to hurt Regina that badly?"
Emma looked away. She was deliberately not thinking about that.