You PROBABLY know where this chapter is going based on the name. Disclaimer at the bottom. What do you think? Did I update quickly enough? I hope I did. I'm reaching a point where I have a bunch of ideas, but I don't have the writing ability to make an entire chapter planet out of them. I will actually combine two or three planets in one chapter sometimes. Is that okay with you guys?
Pergjithshme: The Opposite Planet is definitely an all-time favorite planet for me. Again, sorry for not updating for so long.
Whip-Owl: I know right! It's hard to imagine how it works. If I got into the technical science of it, my head would hurt and the story would be boring.
Guest (AaylaKit?): YES Alternate Boba was awesome! You have a point, though. The real one probably would kill the alternate one.
Aira Skies: Yup, Bail Organa is my favorite character so I just had to do something funny with his alternate.
DarkAngel620: Nice sum-up. :)
Ayy Kaim: I've seen it twice in theaters too! It's #1 on my list of movies I must buy whilst I am in college. AND I have the Avengers Theme on my iPod. Haha, love the signoff. Maralexa is also burdened with a glorious purpose: to provide Fanfiction Entertainment to you beautiful people! :D
Obi-Wan was the first to awaken. This is strange…Why does my head hurt? We don't usually pass out from the Portal, do we…? I mean, we have in the past, but I thought we were used to it by now. He came to the conclusion that whatever happened to them was directly related to the planet that they were going to. For some, they saw images. Like on the Evil Planet, they had nightmares and woke up in a barren wasteland.
Anakin was beside him. Because Obi-Wan was so deep in thought, the Jedi Master did not realize their surroundings. Anakin did. Almost immediately. "What the kriff!" he shouted, breaking Obi-Wan's concentration.
"Anakin, what—" Obi-Wan began, then suddenly realized exactly why Anakin was yelling.
They were tied to the ground. By thousands of long, thin ropes.
"I hate being restrained!" Anakin scowled, trying to struggle free.
"The more you struggle, the more you'll exhaust yourself," Obi-Wan warned him. "The best thing to do is relax and wait until whoever did this comes back to check on us. I'm sure we won't just be left here to die."
"Obi-Wan. We're in the middle of a war. Have you not seen the types of beings that tie innocents up and leave them to die? You've been around longer than I have. You're a Master for crying out loud. You know full well that we shouldn't rule out the possibility that no one is coming for us."
"Try to look at the bright side, Anakin," Obi-Wan said.
"Yeah, Anakin," Kit said, waking up. "Always consider the glass half full."
"The bright side? Are you seriously trying to make me look at the bright side here? You of all people, Obi-Wan? Kit I understand, but you?" He closed his eyes. "Master Fisto, when a glass if half full, it is also half empty. Anyways, why use that reference? The glass is definitely empty. The sun is blazing hot, we're tied up somewhere and we can't even see where because we're so tightly secured…Where's the half full there?"
"He does have a point," Ahsoka said wearily. "Where is the bright side to this?"
"Well…you've been graced with the presence of Kit the Awesome. As long as I'm breathing, the glass is always half full." Kit smirked. Somehow, he always managed to lighten the mood in even the bleakest of situations. The constant smile on his face was uplifting to even Anakin at this point. "Anakin, don't you have the Awesomeness Status? Why so down?"
Anakin didn't want to admit that he was sick of the Portal's games. He wanted to get home to his wife. While they were sight-seeing different dimensions, the war raged on. The Republic needed them. Needed him. "I'm just a little homesick is all," he admitted at last. "I'm sure we're missed. I can't help but wonder how everything is functioning back home."
"Don't worry. We'll get home," Ahsoka reassured him. "The Portal will bring us back to Coruscant when it's ready. Until then, there's nothing you can do. Instead of wasting time and energy worrying, why not enjoy yourself? Being homesick will change nothing. It'll just make you miserable. Focus on the moment and let the future come when the future will come."
Anakin blinked. "Did I just get a philosophical lesson from my padawan?" he asked, bemused. Ahsoka's statements had made him forget being homesick almost completely. Though Padmé would not leave his mind at any point in time, he could at least relax a little.
Kit and Obi-Wan were as surprised as Anakin. "Um…Very good, Ahsoka," Obi-Wan said.
"Yeah. That was…awesome! You're on your way to earning the Awesomeness Status!" Kit said. "I'd slap a high-five, but I think with the given circumstances you'd understand why I must refrain." He winked.
"Ahem." A new voice interrupted their discussion. Right next to Anakin's head was a tiny little person about the size of an average index finger. He was about middle-aged and wore silver armor and a gold cape. "You're up."
"Yeah, we're up," Kit said. "Want to explain what's going on here?"
"The beach you lay on is part of my territory. You have committed the criminal act of falling from the sky. We know not where your magic comes from, but we will find out soon enough. You will come with me, or I will have no choice but to use violence."
"You and what army?" Anakin asked.
"Anakin, don't you know anything?" Kit hissed. "You never ask someone that, or they'll whip out their big fancy army and bang you're dead."
"I'm sure an army of minis won't be much of a threat," Anakin pointed out. "Ow!" The moment he had said that, a mini arrow had punctured his cheek. "Hey!"
"Say hello to my little friends," the not-so-friendly greeter said.
"Ha! I see what you did there!" Kit laughed. "You know…little…because…you're little…and…I'll shut up now."
They were pretty much surrounded by an army of little people dressed in old-style armor just like the first guy's. They all had bows and arrows at the ready.
"Hey now," Kit said. "No need for that. I'd put my hands up to indicate peaceful intentions, but sadly, I am bound."
"Let us negotiate about this," Obi-Wan urged.
"If I could reach my lightsaber, it would be aggressive negotiations," Anakin said through his teeth.
"Be nice, Master," Ahsoka said. "I'm sure these guys are just afraid of us."
"We fear nothing!" one of the mini soldiers shouted.
"Could you keep your voice down?" another demanded. "You sound like claps of thunder!"
Anakin and Kit chuckled. Obi-Wan flashed a warning glare, but finally laughed as well. The idea of sounding like thunder to a bunch of mini people was pretty hilarious. Even the fact that they were tied to the ground seemed trivial.
"What kind of witchcraft did you use?" an older voice asked. The army parted to reveal a little chief-type dude. "Falling from the sky is no easy task. You must be sorcerers. State your identities."
"Obi-Wan Kenobi," Obi-Wan introduced himself. "The other human is my former apprentice, Anakin Skywalker, and then there's his apprentice, Ahsoka Tano. The jokester over there is Kit Fisto."
"All right, I know your names. That's a start, I guess," the chief mumbled. "Now, what kind of magic do you possess?"
"We don't," Obi-Wan said.
"We have the Force," Ahsoka reminded him.
"Right!" Anakin felt stupid for not realizing this sooner. He could wipe these people out easily by using his powers.
Obi-Wan, knowing Anakin so well, sensed his intentions. "Anakin, think. If you knock them all out, who will free us?" he whispered.
"You can't whisper here without the whole planet knowing what you're saying!" one of the soldiers barked.
"You intend to use your magic to wipe out my people," the chief said. "Why?"
"Why are you dressed like a traditional person while your 'people' have armor on?" Ahsoka asked.
"That is none of your concern. Explain this Force of yours, or you will be executed at once," the chief ordered.
"Ooh, harsh," Kit chuckled. "If we don't tell you our secrets, you'll kill us on the spot! Some great leader you are. You don't even know who we are yet and you haven't even offered us a drink or anything!"
The chief pointed a spear at Kit's eye. "Don't make me use this."
Kit frowned. "Right. Um, Obi-Wan? Mr. Negotiator? You want to sort this out before I get a mother-kriffing spear jabbed into my eyeball?"
"Of course," Obi-Wan said. "We have what are called Midi-cholorians. They reside in our cells and…well…basically make us more in-tune to the Force. We can use it in many ways. It gives us energy and power and allows us to manipulate things around us. We can do many things with the Force." He started to ramble on, falling into one of his familiar lectures that Anakin hated so much.
"All right, he gets the point," Anakin said. "You want an easier description?" He reached out into the Force and lifted the chief into the air. "That's the Force." A bunch of little arrows were fired at Anakin. Surprisingly, they stung quite a bit. Anakin immediately lost focus and let the chief drop. "Okay, stop already! I was just doing a demonstration!" His eyes watered. Thankfully, none of the arrows had gotten to them.
"Great, you ticked them off," Kit said, laughing. "At least that spear is away from my eye. Thanks, Anakin, for directing their anger away from me."
"You're welcome," Anakin scowled.
"This could be of great help to us," the chief said, getting up. "You realize that we could smite all our enemies with these four?" He looked around. "Are all of you this powerful?"
"Well, I don't like to brag, but I am the most powerful Jedi around," Anakin said proudly.
"And the most arrogant," Kit added. Anakin rolled his eyes. "Oh, you know it's true."
"Cut their bonds," the chief ordered. "They're coming to the City."
The ropes were cut. The Jedi got up stiffly and stretched their sore limbs. Anakin started plucking arrow by arrow out of his skin. "How come they only fired on me?" he complained. "Ow."
"Because you're the only one that provoked them," Obi-Wan responded.
"Kit did, though," Anakin pointed out.
"Yes, and I almost got a spear to the eye, thank you very much."
Anakin shrugged. There was no arguing with that. Silently, the Jedi followed the large army all the way to civilization. There were towers and villages alike. Young and old, men, women, and children all resided within the city's limits. There was one building that stood out as the grandest. It must be the chief's quarters, Anakin thought. The place where he does business and stuff.
"Welcome to the City," the chief said. "If you cause trouble, you will be severely punished. If you help us, we will let you stay here in peace."
"How can they hurt us?" Kit wondered quietly.
Of course, his whisper could be heard. "I have an army," the chief said. "You will not be going anywhere anytime soon. Not even your mystical Force can keep you safe from my soldiers. We will fight to the death to save the City."
"That won't be necessary," Obi-Wan assured him. "We are keepers of the peace. We do not wish to start a quarrel with you. We will reside here peacefully, I promise."
"Good. Annabel, put them to work."
It turned out that "putting them to work" was a kind way of saying "work their arses off." Because the Jedi wanted to stay on these people's good side, they worked diligently. However, they collapsed with exhaustion every night. Anakin bit back every sharp remark he had, Kit kept the tone light, Obi-Wan theorized, and Ahsoka did as she was told.
Days passed. They didn't know how long they were there, but they were relieved when the end of each day came. The four of them silently pled for the Portal to come for them, but it did not.
"Are we stuck here?" Ahsoka asked one night.
"I'm not sure," Anakin said. "I hope not." Just as he said that, the beautiful Portal appeared to take them away. Without hesitating, Anakin shouted, "See ya, suckers!" and jumped through.
Kit laughed as the soldiers scrambled around like chickens with their heads cut off.
"What is this witchcraft?"
"What kind of sorcery is this?"
"Is this the Force they were talking about?"
Kit shrugged. "I don't know the answer to any of those questions," he admitted. "I do know one thing. I'm out. Peace!" He leapt after Anakin, followed by Obi-Wan and Ahsoka.
Disclaimer: I do not own the Gulliver's Travels references. I do not own Star Wars either.
AN: Thumbs up to everyone who thought "We have a Hulk" in response to the chief's statement "I have an army." Haha anyway, I've never read Gulliver's Travels nor seen the movie with Jack Black, but I know the part where the guy is tied down by a million little ropes and encounters a bunch of tiny people.