ChuckParis15

Chapter 14 – Ends and Beginnings

Chuck Bartowski stared into the mirror and smiled. He opened his mouth wide and once again smiled. His dental 'tortures' were over and he had an entire set of implants although they looked so much like his real teeth that no one who knew him from before would ever guess they were not his God-given pearly-whites.

There was one back molar that wasn't like the others. He'd demanded that the Ring give him an 'out' so that if he were taken, he could rob them of their prize. Jacques understood and made arrangements through some 'off the books' contacts and a capsule of a shellfish toxin had been incorporated into one of his teeth.

"Chuck, you OK in there? Are you sick? Chuck?" Hannah had been with him 24/7, holding his hand whenever he was examined or treated or medicated. She worried constantly about his weight, his progress against the parasites he'd caught and, of course, the corrective dental tortures he'd endured for the past week.

She was his very special girl and he was going to show her every time he thought of it.

'What did I ever do that was so good that I'd be blessed with Hannah?'

He opened the bathroom door and smiled at her and then went over and kissed her with such hunger and passion that it made her head swim.

"Wow! What brought that on? Not that I'm complaining, honey, but wow!"

"I don't have a mouthful of fangs and stumps and I don't have to see the look of horror in your eyes when I smile at you. Now, update me on the wedding plans. We've lost months and I want to get married and start our lives together as soon as we can."

"That can wait, Chuck. I can't. Come on, take me to bed and make me forget the past months. I'm hungry, baby, and you look good enough to eat."

They finally got around to the wedding plans.

Stuart Residence
Arlington, Virginia

She'd fallen asleep. The movie was interesting but she was exhausted from the stress of her job. She woke up with her head in his lap and she smiled when she saw the empty popcorn bowls and empty beer battles on the coffee table. Ellie and Devon must have gone to bed but he'd just held her all night. She always slept over on movie night but last night she'd fallen asleep and he just made adjustments rather than wake her.

"Oh, Chuck, I love waking up like this. I slept so well. You have that effect on me, sweetie." She sat up and looked into the eyes of Mike Stuart and she lost it in spectacular fashion. Every ounce of regret, heartache and loss that she'd bottled up for months came pouring out of her in the form of gut-wrenching sobs.

'So, her mystery man was nicknamed 'Chuck'. She must have loved him deeply and finally allowed herself to lose control and grieve. Just like I did with Lisa.'

He wrapped her up in his arms and just held her, rocking her gently and crooning nonsense syllables into her hair. They were kindred spirits. He'd felt it at once. He saw the sorrow locked behind her blue eyes and knew that he held the key to releasing it and bringing her back into the land of the feeling.

He had no idea how long he held her or how long she sobbed. She finally fell asleep again and he picked her up and took her to the guest bedroom, unzipped and removed her boots and covered her with the comforter.

Mike went into his office and took out a folder from his safe. When Diane Beckman had approached him about flushing out the location of Charles Windsor without 'blowing his cover', he asked for and received a full briefing. Now he wished he hadn't. He'd connected some dots of his own.

He was a moral man with a keen sense of right and wrong. He knew something that Sarah needed to know to provide her with some comfort. The 'someone special' she thought she'd lost in the line of duty was actually alive, but not well. Should he tell her? The man had been sent to Cold Storage by the woman who was lying in the guest bedroom, emotionally exhausted after finally accepting his death.

'If Lisa had been in Chuck's shoes and committed to a deep cover infiltration, would I want to know that she was alive, especially if she'd given up on us and was going to marry another?'

He sighed and replaced the photos of Chuck and Hannah taken at a dinner party in Paris. They looked so happy and perfect together. Even the most jaded of people could see the love that flowed between them as they ate, danced and laughed with one another. Did he have the right to destroy two people's happiness just to make another person 'feel good'?

No.

He replaced the file in his safe and closed the door, resetting the digital combo as was his habit. What was done was done. Beckman had provided him with a little background on Sarah Walker and he knew how she'd treated 'her special someone' when he was alive.

No. Let him have his happiness. Sarah Walker would just have to move on.

Lake Como, Italy

He was a man on the run. Former CIA Agent Daniel Shaw was wanted alive for questioning. Dead was also acceptable. There was a sizeable reward for him alive and an equal amount if he didn't survive capture.

He wasn't used to living on the cusp. He'd allowed himself to become blasé about his situation, merely going through the motions of following up leads on the whereabouts of former NSA Agent Charles Bartowski.

Sarah Walker had tracked him down and left him for dead in a hotel room in Vienna, Austria, and it was only because the whore he'd hired for his stay in Vienna had arrived early to accompany him to dinner that he survived.

He hadn't heard from his control officer, Howard Dill, in months. He'd followed his last instruction to the letter like the good little toy soldier he'd become since Eve…'Don't go there, Danny-boy. You don't need another trip down Memory Lane. You need to stay focused if you're going to be worth more than a cup of warm spit. She's dead. You know it. You were there. It was someone's Red Test – and they'd passed with flying colors with three 9mm rounds to the chest.'

He shook himself and went to the final drop point. If there was no message from Dill, then he'd been burned and had no recourse but to fall back on Eve's plan to go off the grid, under the radar, behind the scenes.

Stuart Residence
Arlington, VA

He was in the kitchen tidying up after breakfast. The kids were over at a neighbor's house playing on their trampoline. He'd just turned on the dishwasher when he heard her clear her throat to get his attention.

"Morning, Sarah. You're lucky. My meltdown came on the floor of the House during a debate on some stupid housing bill. At least you weren't live on C-SPAN. Now that that's out of the way, there's fresh coffee in the pot. How do you like your eggs?"

"I – I – I'm so embarrassed, Mike. I don't know what happened…"

"You finally accepted your loss for what it was. The ones we lost? They're not coming back to us – ever. We have to accept it and move on with our lives. If it's any consolation, you're the first woman I've ever asked out since Lisa…since Lisa was killed by a drunk driver. It wasn't quick and it wasn't painless and I stood there watching the firemen cut her out of the wreckage and then she died."

"I was in a surveillance van and Chuck was making contact with someone and we all assumed he'd been 'turned'. My partner was told by our supervisor to 'take the shot' and he did. He's dead. It was all a horrible misunderstanding but he's still dead. I guess I accepted the fact last night and I – I – does it ever get better? Does it ever stop hurting?"

"Nope. It never stops as long as you love them but not loving them would hurt even more. Just take it a day at a time, Sarah. Find something good in each day and hold on to it when it starts hurting. I have an advantage you don't – I have my kids. I don't think I'd be standing here now, spooning out this bullshit to you if I didn't have them."

"I don't think it's bullshit, Mike. I think it's the truth. Scrambled. And I'd love a cup of coffee."

"Scrambled, coming right up. The cups are in the cabinet above the coffee pot."

'She'll be fine if she just focuses on living the rest of her life and not reliving the past.'

Chateau Almandine
Paris, France

Ellie and Hannah had solved the security problem with a public wedding – it would be strictly private and by invitation only. They'd discovered a chapel on the grounds of the chateau that hadn't seen a coat of paint since before WWI and they put their efforts into rehabilitating the chapel for the wedding.

The guest list was over 200 people long and so it was decided to have the wedding in the chateau gardens and pray for good weather. The backup plan? There was none. Hannah and Ellie figured that no one would dare stand in the way of the wedding considering the last two postponements – not even the Almighty Himself.

It turned out to be a beautiful fall day and everything was perfect. The groom was nervous, the best man (Hugo) misplaced the rings for a few frantic moments, the bride was beautiful and the father of the bride was bursting with pride as he walked his daughter down the long aisle to the altar.

The reception turned into a raucous party that lasted well into the early morning hours. Chuck and Hannah had slipped away to an unknown location followed closely by a security team that was sworn to both discretion and secrecy by the Director General. They were honeymooning in Thailand but the rest of the world thought they were in the Canary Islands.

After the happy couple had departed, Hugo rounded up the heads of the various regions in attendance and they met with the Director General in the refurbished chapel.

"My friends, I've decided to retire. My health is not what it should be and the Ring has matured into an almost totally legitimate operation. We will soon be listed on the Paris Stock Exchange under our new name, Circus Information Services. As my new son-in-law is so fond of saying, 'this business is like a 3-ring circus', and so it is. Now, to the topic of a successor, I nominate the current CEO of CIS, Charles Windsor, who has proven to be more than competent to run our growing and profitable organization. As you all know, our profits are up 300% and our 'losses' both in material and personnel are at all-time lows. Are there other nominees?"

The floor was opened to nominations and debate and finally it came down to a vote.

Stuart Residence
Arlington, VA

Sarah Walker became a regular at the family movie nights at the Stuart house. She liked his kids and they liked her. She'd been uncomfortable at first until his daughter, Megan, had asked her if she had a minute to discuss something in private. 'Uh Oh, here it comes. Why are you here? You're not our mother'.

She asked Sarah about tampons. She had no one else to ask. She was horribly embarrassed and stammered and almost started to cry and Sarah felt something shift in her chest and she hugged the girl tightly and whispered that she had lost her own mother at an earlier age and no one was around to answer those questions for her.

"Megan, you can ask me anything and I'll always tell you the truth. Your Dad would try his best but some things are best left to us girls. So, anytime you have a question, ask it. I'll do my best to answer it honestly. And it'll always be our secret, OK?"

They went shopping that Saturday and spent the whole day just having fun. She never would have thought that having a kid around could be such fun.

From then on, Saturdays were spent at the mall or just doing girl things together. Mike just grinned and reminded Sarah that baseball season was just around the corner and the family always attended the Saturday games together.

"I got you a season ticket so make sure you keep Saturdays free."

"But what about the night games and Sundays? Do you have season tickets also?"

"Yes. Why?"

"Because I'm suddenly a great fan of baseball. And if you're free some evenings…"

"Are you asking me out on a date, Director?"

"Dates, Congressman. I'm sure the Senators play at home more than just Saturdays."

They became an A-list couple in Washington. She moved in with him three months later. The commute was a killer but there were undeniable fringe benefits. Christmas was a family first for Sarah. She felt totally accepted.

One morning over breakfast, with the kids already out and about, Mike asked her if she'd ever considered a career change.

"Why would I do that? I'm finally in a position where I can make a difference."

"Well, I've been asked to run for governor of Virginia and I need a First Lady." He held a ring in his fingers and looked at her with an unasked question in his eyes. He hadn't really accepted the offer and there was another, more prestigious one in the wings that he really wanted them to have.

"You're assuming you'll win, Mike. What if you lose?"

"With you beside me, how can I lose?"

"Yes, Mike, I'll marry you." Her eyes sparkled and she sat on his lap and kissed him hungrily.

"Um, y'know, you've never told me you loved me. I've said it but you've never said, 'Mike, I love you'."

"Mike, I…" She couldn't meet his eyes.

"I guess second place is all I can hope for? Let me know when it's convenient for your schedule, Director." He stood up and abruptly almost dumping her ass on the kitchen floor and walked out of the kitchen. She did say yes but she didn't look as thrilled with the idea as she should have been.

'Damn it! Why can't I say it? I never told Chuck and I lost him.'

She tracked him down in his den, just closing the safe after retrieving a folder with the 'Top Secret' red diagonal stripe across its width. She ignored it, concentrating on the most important thing in her life – Mike Stuart.

"I'm sorry. I – I just have a problem with…damn it, Mike, I do love you and I want to be part of this family. My old partner said spies were emotionally stunted – 'constipated' was his description – and I know I don't tell you but I do love you, Mike, and I want us to be together forever."

Mike inserted the folder down the shredder feeder and turned it on. He'd take the bag in to the office Monday and have it burned with the other classified documents on the Ring. He'd almost given her back her precious Chuck.

"Let's go tell the kids, Mike. Megan's going to explode just like Ellie…I mean, she's going to be so happy for us. You get to tell your son the unapproachable. I think he's the reincarnation of his namesake, 'Jeb Stuart'."

"Hey, don't knock the lineage. If Gettysburg had turned out differently…"

She held out her left hand, fingers splayed. "Give me your ring, Mike, and then kiss me. I do love you, really, and I'll work hard to be more open. I feel it, I just can't say it easily like you guys do."