DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT! THERE, I SAID IT.
AN: Buenos dias chicas. Una pregunta…quien esta enamorada con Robert? Mmmm….
Brownie points if you understood what I wrote in spanish. Not my forte, by the way, but eh, it gets me by. I've had this chapter done since Tuesday but I've not had a chance to proof read it and edit some bad grammar until last night, so forgive me.
Okay, so in my last chapter, I thanked the wrong person for the whole dildo idea in Tanya's apartment. The idea went to Pastiche Pen…the original idea was to hang them up on her Christmas Tree, but since I'm not really going by holidays in the story, I improvised. So, many, many thanks.
Just to let you know, the surprises are not over…Edward and Bella have yet to get together and it will come soon! The part you guys are waiting for…just don't give up!
Song: If I never see you're face again by Maroon 5 and Rhianna.
"Edward? Sweetheart, did I wake you?"
I awoke Sunday morning to the sound of my cell phone ringing. It jolted me out of a dream that I was having featuring my dark haired, brown eyed beauty. And it brought me to the reality that was my life when I heard the blond haired blue eyed woman that was my fiancé.
I sighed into the phone.
"Yeah, you did, but that's okay. I needed to get up anyway, Tanya. What's up?"
"Oh Edward, I just got called to go away this morning. I'm actually on my way out the door to catch my plane. I hope you didn't have any huge plans with me. I'm really sorry honey."
She's leaving.
She's leaving.
She's leaving.
I couldn't find it in my heart to feel sad about this. In fact, I was ecstatic. This meant that I could spend more time with Bella without any kind of interruption. The only draw back was that I had really wanted to break it off with her today and I didn't want to do it over the phone. Regardless of what she had done, I still cared enough not to be a jerk and break off years worth of history with her over the phone. That just wasn't me.
So, I figured as soon as she got back, I'd have the talk with her. Nothing much I could do until then but wait.
"No actually, I had nothing major planned. Just go on ahead and do what you've got to do…I'll be here when you get back. I'd like to see you though as soon as you do come back into town."
"Of course, Edward. I'll be sure to see you then."
She hung up then and I laid back down on my bed. This was it - the day that I had been waiting for. Today, I was going to tell Bella that I loved her and ask her to be mine. I hope she doesn't exactly mind that I haven't gotten a chance to speak to Tanya yet, but I'll be upfront and honest with her. Tanya is gone, regardless of Bella's answer.
Bella.
Just the sound of her name on my lips sent my body into a fit of giddiness. I don't know what it is about her, but I just had to have her for myself. The only problem now was James. I knew she was still with him, but I was hoping that maybe her relationship wasn't as serious as mine was. Even if she didn't want to leave him, I'd be there for her…
And I'd love her till the end of time. Come hell or high water, she was going to know that I loved her today.
Just then, Jasper poked his head into my door. "Hey dude, we're planning on going over to the girl's apartment today; wanna join us?"
Oh yes…I'm definitely going.
--------------------------------------------
I sat in our kitchen having a bowl of cereal contemplating the weirdness that was my life. I was in love with a man I couldn't have. My boyfriend was bisexual and had the hots for said man and even thought about him while having sex with me. I walked in yesterday to find my bisexual boyfriend jacking off to visions of my love and we had decided to break it off after that. Oh and not to mention Edward's fiancé was cheating on him and I watched a porno with my ex-boyfriend.
I wonder if that summed up my messed up, screwed up life.
I honestly don't know what I'd do if Edward picked Tanya over me. I think I'd go into hiding and take a break from things for a while. There would be no way I could see him with her and not have my heart break.
And then there were the girls…
They had no clue as to my feelings toward Edward…and if he didn't want me, I'd have to explain to the girls why I was locked away in my room crying my eyes out.
Or…
I could just go back home for a spell. I'm pretty sure I could spend some free time with my father. Charlie and I never had much bonding time and this would be a perfect time to go see him.
"Bella?"
I jerked myself from my thoughts and looked up at Rosalie. She was dressed beautifully today and my only thought was that Emmett was probably on his way over here.
I was happy for her, truly I was, but I couldn't help but envy both Alice and Rose for their perfect choices. They had someone that loved them unconditionally and who they loved the same way as well. I couldn't be happier for them, I really couldn't.
But I couldn't be here with them either. Not if they were going to snuggle up with one another and be mushy and lovey dovey. No, definitely not that.
And, I didn't even have James anymore. I still haven't told the girl's we'd broken up yet. I hadn't come up with a good enough reason that didn't sound like a flat out lie. Somehow saying, 'Oh, turns out he's into guys as well and he's into Edward but so am I and so that's why we didn't really work out', wasn't going to cut it with them.
"Sorry Rose, I'm in my own world again this morning. What's up? You planning on going out today?"
"Actually, no, the guys are coming over here to spend the day with us. I was hoping that if you weren't going to do anything today that you could join us so that Edward wouldn't be so bored here alone."
Edward…here? Does that mean…
"Turns out that Tanya is out of town and he doesn't have a place to go at the moment. Would you mind, Bella? Pretty, pretty please? With lots and lots of virgin cherries on top?"
I had to smile at that. How could I deny this beautiful woman anything? Especially when she was being so nice.
"Sure, Rose, I'll do it. Let me go get dressed and I'll be right out of my room in a moment."
She nodded and went to work on straightening out the sofa cushions, making sure our apartment was ready for their boys.
I made my way back to my room and sighed deeply, having this huge urge to cry. For a brief moment, I had thought that Edward was coming over because he wanted to see me and tell me he loved me…that he couldn't be without me…that he needed me as much as I needed him. Instead, he was coming over because Tanya was away again and he needed company.
And like a love sick puppy, I knew I'd be there for him, over and over and over again.
Might as well shower and get this show on the road. My friends were counting on me.
-------------------------------------------
The knock on the door had me jump on the couch. I was jittery and nervous and I felt nauseous…not a very good combination when you were trying to be social with your friends.
"Hello beautiful ladies, how are ya'll today?" Jasper walked in with a very cute smile on which Alice just went nuts over. Emmett didn't have to say anything as he and Rosalie were already in a tongue wrestling match. That only left one other person…
Edward.
And currently, he was making a face at Emmett since he was blocking the front door to come inside. Edward was getting a front row seat to the hot and heavy and sloppy make out session that was Emmett and Rose.
"Dude…get the hell out of the way. I really, really don't want to see that right now."
Emmett let go of Rose's lips and started giving her little nips on her neck. "It's a good thing you can't read my mind right now Eddie or you'd be getting quite a visual."
Edward shoved past Emmett, barely squeezing by him while rolling his eyes. "Seriously guys, get a room…and preferably not right now."
Jasper laughed and finally looked up at me. "Hey, Bella. Sorry we've been so rude. It's good to see you."
I nodded in both their directions and concentrated on Edward. He looked and gave me his heart wrenching crooked grin. I had no idea how I was going to tell this boy no if he ever wanted anything more out of me.
"Bella…"
My name coming out of his lips was just sinful. I felt myself start to breathe a little faster as he was fast approaching me, working his way toward the couch to sit by me.
"Edward, it's so nice to see you today. How was you're night?"
He looked taken aback at my attempt for normalcy…but really, I couldn't afford not to be.
"It was fine, you know, not much going on."
I nodded. The answer he gave me was vague and it could mean anything. Were they over or not?
"Bella, I really would love to talk to you in private for a moment, if I can."
It was then that I noticed that his hands were balled up in fists at his sides and he looked abnormally fidgety. It wasn't like Edward to be nervous and my stomach flopped. This couldn't be good, could it? There was only one way to find out. It was now or never.
"Of course, we could go to my room if you'd like?"
He nodded and I was about to get up to lead the way when my cell phone rang.
Who could that be?
I reached for it and glanced at the caller ID.
Charlie. I wonder what happened?
My father never really calls me, especially on Sunday's. It was usually game day.
"One minute, Edward. It's my father."
"Of course, Bella. No problem."
"Hello? Dad? Is everything okay?"
"Bella? Young lady, NO, EVERYTHING IS NOT OKAY!"
Oh Shit…
Charlie hardly ever yelled at me. It was one of those things that he never had the need to do. I was always a good child and did everything I was supposed to do. What could be wrong?
Unless…
Unless…
He knew.
Holy shit…
I feigned ignorance – at least until I could tell just how much he knew.
"What do you mean, dad? I don't understand…"
"Don't act stupid with me, Bella. You know exactly what you've been doing these last couple of years. I can't believe you! I mean, how could you do something like this? Pornography? Really?"
Yep. He knew.
"Look, dad, it's not that bad…"
Again, he didn't let me finish.
"Not bad? Bella, you are doing some pretty awful acts for money! I just can't wrap my mind around the concept! I mean, what did I do wrong in raising you?"
"You didn't do anything wrong! And what I do for a living is not wrong either! Believe it or not, I enjoy what I do. It brings me really good money and I'm good at it, dad. I'm sorry it's not a lawyer or a doctor or a teacher or any of that other stuff you wished for me, but I love what I do…"
By this time, everyone in the room had frozen what they were doing. Rose and Alice had broken away from their boyfriends and came to join me. Edward had nothing but concern on his face and Emmett and Jasper looked like they had walked into a horrible argument and didn't exactly know what to do.
Alice grabbed my hand and squeezed while Rose put her arm around my shoulders.
"Enough! I don't want to hear it, Bella. You are going to march your way to wherever it is you work and tell them you're quitting. You'll come back here with me and we'll find you a more respectful and decent job."
"I don't want to quit and I'm definitely not going back home with you, dad. I'm sorry that you feel that way…"
Suddenly, a thought occurred to me. I furrowed my brow as I wondered and I suddenly asked my question out loud before I could think to stop myself.
"How did you find out what I do anyway? "
Silence.
I was greeted by fucking silence.
Finally, I heard him. "Well…I mean…I was…It just so happened…"
He was a terrible liar. This is where I inherited it from. I glanced up at the audience in the living room and slapped my hand against my forehead.
"Oh dad…did you see one of my videos?"
Everyone's jaw dropped at my question. Alice and Rose looked horrified but the boys looked slightly amused and disgusted. If my world wasn't crumbling apart right at this moment, I would've thought it was quite amusing.
"That's beside the point, Bella. I mean, I stopped it as soon as I saw that it was my own daughter!! Can you imagine my shock and utter horror?!"
Oh. My. God.
My father had seen me in a porn video. I wonder which one it was though. There is no telling what heinous act he saw me do.
"Oh dad, I'm so sorry you had to see that. I admit that I should've told you. Really, I should've…but"
"You know what? I don't want to talk about this anymore Bella. I'll talk to you later."
I didn't even get a chance to tell him bye. He just hung up.
I sat there in silence as I stared at my phone. This was so not the way I wanted my father to find out…but I suppose it had been my fault for lying to him all these years.
"Bella? Honey are you alright?"
Was I alright? Even I was beginning to wonder at this point.
"Yes, I'm fine. It was Charlie. He just found out what exactly I did for a living."
"You mean you didn't tell him already?" Emmett looked a bit shocked. Unfortunately, he didn't understand that not everyone was open and honest with their parents.
"No, I didn't tell him. Call me crazy, but I didn't exactly know how to break the news to the Chief of Police that his daughter chose the pornography industry to become a star."
"It's okay, Bella. Don't worry about it. You know we love you, right?"
I nodded, feeling better that Rose and Alice would never judge me or my chosen profession…but Charlie was not so kind.
"I take it all of your parents already know, huh?" I looked around the room as all of them nodded their heads.
"You already know that my parents did not approve and that I have a hard time even to this day," Alice said.
Rosalie spoke up next. "Yeah, my parents didn't give me shit over it. They told me as long as I'm happy, their happy."
Emmett smiled and said, "My parents expected no less. We were always open with one another and I'd always been fascinated with the porno industry so I joined. My parents are like Rose's. So long as I'm happy and staying the hell out of trouble or jail."
I had to laugh at that. I could see Emmett's parents just waiting for a phone call to come and drag their wild child out of the slammer.
Edward spoke up next. "My parents know, but their not happy about it. I had the options to going on to medical school or even the music field; so obviously, my choice of profession didn't go over smoothly with them. But it's what made me happy and I was good at it so my parent's gave me there blessing."
I nodded and looked over to Jasper. He seemed to be fidgeting and rubbing the back of his neck. He looked a tad bit nervous.
"You know you don't have to Jasper." Edward looked at him, conveying a message to him. Apparently, his parents knowing about his profession was a sore subject.
"It's okay, Jasper. You don't have to tell me. I can totally understand if you're parents don't approve of you."
"Psht. He wishes that was his problem."
Emmett's outburst earned a glare from Jasper.
"It's no problem, really. It's just a bit embarrassing, that's all." His eyes flickered over to Alice and she looked at him with nothing but love and adoration in her eyes.
"Jasper, I could never think less of you or your family…that is, unless they hurt you."
He smiled and grabbed a chair to sit down. Emmett sat on our recliner with Rose on his lap and Edward sat in the chair closest to me and straddled it, leaning on it, his chin resting on the top of the chair.
"Okay so, I grew up in a really nice neighborhood. Both my parents worked hard and gave me all that I could ever need. I was an only child and so my parents saw that I got a good education at the top notch private schools in our area. "
"My mom and dad were well known around our community and I looked up to them, hoping to be like my father some day. He was a big CEO and my mother was the perfect mother and wife. Our lives reminded me of those old sitcom shows where you had the perfect family."
"One day, I came back for a holiday vacation. My parent's still had my old room available and so that's where I stayed. One night, mom and dad came into my room and told me how proud of me they were."
He was quiet for a moment as I took it all in. He really had led the perfect life. But even I knew there was no such thing as a perfect life.
"Did they know what you did?" I wasn't sure what they were proud of him for.
"Yeah, you see, apparently, they just found out that evening what I did for a living. They bought the new DVD that was out and I was in it."
I sucked in a breath of air, totally in shock. Rose and Alice were shocked as well but Emmett and Edward looked like they'd heard this all before.
"You mean…"
"Yep. They were happy that their son was an up and coming star in that line of work. It turns out that my parents led another life, one that I wasn't aware of."
"What do you mean?"
"He's trying to say that they enjoy the company of other people. Sexual company."
Oh.
Oh.
"You're parent's are swingers?"
He nodded. "One of their friends asked my parents what my name was. When they confirmed the name was the same, my dad took a quick peek at the video and visually confirmed that that was indeed his son. There was so much rave about me going on, how I was the next big thing to hit the screen that he couldn't help but be proud of me. He told everyone that I took after him." He rolled his at that last comment.
"So you didn't know any of this? Throughout your whole life, you knew nothing?"
"No, I didn't. They'd always had plenty of friends, sure, but I never put two and two together. They are quite happy, I assure you, and I am happy for them. I just find it hard to talk about because my parents are very eccentric."
Wow. I'd no idea that Jasper's life was the way it had been. No wonder when we'd been dating, he'd always tensed up at the mention of parents.
"Do you're parents…you know…watch your movies?" Rose looked over at him, almost dreading the answer.
"No. They may be different, but their not sickos. They don't watch anything I make, but they keep up with my career and read my reviews. They are honestly my biggest fans."
Alice got up and threw her arms over Jasper. "You have no idea how lucky you are that you're parents accept what you do, no questions asked. I would kill to have parents that loved me unconditionally."
Jasper rubbed her back and whispered sweet nothings to Alice's ear. They looked so wonderful together. Rose was snuggled up to Emmett's body, both cherishing the feel of one another. I sighed as I realized I was the odd one out. Edward was staring at the floor, trying to look anywhere but at the people in the room. I could see he was in deep concentration and I wondered if maybe he didn't want to give me the bad news now that my day had started off badly. He probably felt sorry for me.
I finally couldn't take it anymore and I got up. "Hey guys, if it's okay with you, I'm just going to head out. I need to clear my mind for a bit."
The fabulous four nodded their heads as I grabbed my keys and purse. Before I could walk out, I heard Edward call out as well. "I'm going to go with Bella, just to make sure she doesn't get hurt. Is that okay? I would really like to join you."
I nodded, knowing I was probably digging my own grave. I couldn't believe I'd just agreed to let Edward walk with me just so he can dump me in private. This day was just getting worse and worse.
We got out to the sidewalk as I made a turn when he reached out and took my arm. "Bella, you mind if we just go for a ride in my car? Driving really takes my mind off of things."
"Sure, whatever you want."
We got in, both of us not really saying much of anything. We passed store after store, light after light going in circles. Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I was getting antsy.
"Edward, can we just please go somewhere and talk? I know you want to."
He nodded and drove to his destination taking about fifteen minutes to get there. I looked up when he finally parked the car.
I recognized the place right away and my heart started beating fast. I had no idea what this meant.
"We're here, Bella. Do you mind if we step into my apartment so we can talk?"
AN: Hale yes, I left it there. I'll put up the next chapter soon, but I'd like to hear what you think of this whole thing.
Also, britishbitches is doing a smutvent calendar featuring a different author everyday until Christmas. My story will be out on Monday so I'd really appreciate the love from you guys if you all go there and review for me! I've got them posted on my profile and if you subscribe to the story, then you'll be sure to get the update on Monday! There are other really great authors there as well, including fiberkitty and mischief-maker1. WE NEED YOUR LOVE!!
Until next time folks!