ARGHHH SHITE! I AM SOO SORRY IT'S TAKEN AGES BUT, I HAVE MY FINAL EXAMS COMING UP SO... MUST REVISE! THANK YOU FOR BEING PAITENT WITH ME!

Thank You To All Of My Reviewers, it means alot to know I am not wasting my time on here.

Now for the boring part:

DISCLAIMER:

I am in no way,shape or form associated or affiliated with Stephenie Meyer. She owns everything apart from the plot. (Im The Genious That Came Up With That)

And now that we've cleared up the fact I'm just your average Joe (or Beckky?) shall we continue with the story?

I think we shall...

A heart cannot be fixed with Sellotape; only Glue will hold

***Chapter Nine***

Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?

Dont cha?

Dont cha, baby?

Dont cha?

Don't Cha - PCD

When I awoke I was in the guestroom at the Cullen manor, part of me started hoping that all that had happened was a dream. I had almost convinced myself it was until I took a deep breath. My lungs were burning and with every breath I took it only got worse. So, I sat up against the plush, feather pillows to re-assess my injuries. I looked down at myself and knew Carlisle had fixed me up. I was clean and only had some pretty painful bruises and some minor scrapes and cuts, nothing too major - for which, I was pleased. I decided I'd take a nice, long bubble bath in the jaccuzi tub waiting for me in the en-suite.

I got out of bed with a lot of pain and effort on my part and walked into the ajoining room to run the bath. I added lots of smelling oils; lavender and vanilla mainly; it was Esme's scent and it relaxed and comforted me, which is what I needed most. When the tub was full I carefully removed my clothes, so as not to injure myself further and slowly settled into the jacuzzi, when I was fully emerged my muscles practically heaved a sigh of a relief. The combined force of the hot water and jets immediatley went to work massaging the knots that had take up residence in my body. I had been soaking for an hour when I heard the bedroom door open.

"Bella?" I heard Carlisle's voice call.

"In the bath, Carlisle." I replied.

"Bella, you really shouldn't be up, you've gone through so much, you need rest!"

"No Dad, I needed a good, long soak in the amazing jacuzzi you have, which is what I got and I feel bloody amazing. Oh, and after this bath I need to hurry up and heal so I can get my shit together and formulate a plan to fuck the Mafia into a soulless oblivion!" I heard multiple gasps outside the bathroom door and knew my soak was officially over. So, I got out carefully and wrapped myself in a towel before any of the guy's decided I was incapable of it and came in here. I walked into the bedroom feeling heaps better and looked to the Cullens, Peter and Char who were gaping at me.

"What?" I asked. Emmett came and hugged me.

"I can't believe you're okay! I mean I'm glad you are but still... I missed you, baby sis!" N'aww, he is so sweet... sometimes...

"I missed you too, Emmybear and you should know by now takes a lot more than murdering psychopaths to get rid of me!"

"What happened, Bella?" Jasper asked from the corner of the room, he looked upset and something else. I sat down on my bed and decided it was time to spill. Everything.

"Right, I have decided, I love you all enough to trust you, so I will tell you... after I tell you about my life after you guys left... it was no picnic..." The all pretty much dropped to the floor with their legs crossed.

"We're listening, Bella." I looked to Carlisle and Esme.

"Mom, Dad? Can you sit with me?" They were by my side instantly, Esme lifted me gently and cradled me, stroking my hair, whilst Carlisle wrapped his arm around us. Here we go... I told them about everything... Jacob, Leah, my babies, my rebellious years and Victoria. When I was done with that I moved on to everything I knew about the mafia and my experiences. When I finally finished the Cullens had been shocked into silence. Rosalie was the first to speak.

"I thought you said you were infertile?"

"I am, seriously, ask any doctor, in fact Carlisle can give me an ultrasound, I have no womb. The wolves speculated it was something in their sperm because the babies actually grew their own 'womb' around themselves before they started developing. Freaky shit." I said. Rosalie nodded in acceptance, it made sense. Emmett was next.

"My baby sis fought a fucking vamp and won! I need that on a t-shirt! Bellyboo, me and you gonna have so much fun!"

"Yeah, sure... when I'm healed and after I kick the Mafia's ass seven ways to Sunday, I'll pencil you in." I joked... kinda... the Mafia was gonna pay. Peter spoke up then.

"Yeah, we are gonna have to sort those pesky fuckers out A.S.A.P. cos no one fucks up my gal and lives." There were nods and grunts of agreement all around the room. I started to shake my head.

"Nuh-uh, sorry, no can do. You see, they're human - well thats what their genetic makeup says - therefore, they are in my juristiction, meaning, if anyone is gonna kill the bastards, it's gonna be me. Y'all can watch though." I smiled and winked.

"Ugh, fuck my life." Peter whined, I grinned triumphantley, if he was cursing he obviously 'felt' I was gonna get my way. The Cullen's knew that too, I guess because they shared his sentiments, it was amusing to say the least...

[One Month Later]

I was stood in my room at the Cullens looking at myself in the full length mirror admiring my outfit. It had been 4 weeks since the attack/kidnap bullshit and the last bruise had completely faded away so I was going out tonight to get laid. It had been way too long. I picked out a fuck hot, pantydropping outfit that screamed 'fuck me/I'm horny'. I did my makeup and went downstairs to tell the others I was going.

When I walked in Peter was the first to turn and stare he grinned and wolf-whistled.

"Yeah, baby! Thats my Isobel!" The rest turned at the commotion and looked gobsmacked. Char came up to me and we shared a sensual peck on the lips.

"Hey baby, fancy painting the town red tonight?" I winked at her.

"Hell yeah! Petey, come the fuck on time is wasting!" She looked to Peter and flitted upstairs to get changed.

"Anymore takers?" I questioned.

"Nah, I think we'll take the free house thanks." Rose said and winked towards Emmett.

"Major, you better get ready cos I am so not walking into this shit alone. I need my man to watch my back and make sure the oestrogen doesn't turn me pansy." Peter said, actually kind of nervously. I laughed along with Jasper. Ten minutes later, we had all piled into my Aston and headed to my club - apparently they liked it there. When we pulled into the parking lot I saw a car that made me see red.

"Houston, we have a problem."

"Whats up Bells?"

"You guys see that red Chevy over there?"

"Yeah.. what about it?"

"It belongs to one Mr Jacob Black, anyone up for puppy soup?"

Review. Review. Review.

Go raibh maith ad,

Beckky (: