Disclaimer:We do not own or profit from Gundam Wing. For who could love Dorothy's eyebrows?
Author Notes: We got this chapter written in 1/4th of our regular time. It helps to be in person. I really want Taco Bell. Someone make Cltc get me a burrito.
Authors:Foxy Mcgee and Cltcmistress
Quatre was pissed. For the past week, Duo had kept brushing him off or avoiding him completely. He'd had enough. It took every scheming bone in his body, but he finally got the other three out of the house on various errands before Duo knew or could use any of them as a shield. Moving down the hall, he could hear some movie playing on the television. Quatre whistled a tune as he entered the room and sat on the other end of the couch from where Duo was flopped. "Hello." He glanced at the screen as someone was doing something they dramatically called a 'Power Slide.' "Interesting movie." [1]
"Yeah." Duo kept his eyes on the screen, not glancing at the blonde.
Quatre glanced at him sideways. He smirked and settled into the couch further, shifting so he was just a bit closer to the braided pilot.
Duo shot him a look from the corner of his eye, then turned back to the movie.
He waited a few more minutes before finally his impatience got the better of him. He snatched the remote, clicked the screen off, then tossed the controller to the opposite side of the room. Turning to look at Duo, he frowned. "You've been avoiding me."
"Maybe, maybe not." He turned to face the blonde pilot, with a look of disinterest.
"That black eyes is fading." His eyes assessed Duo as he stood from the couch and stepped closer. Quatre placed his hands on the back of the couch on either side of hi head and leaned down so he was nose to nose with him. "Why would you go and do something such as avoiding me? That's not very nice."
"I didn't say I was." Duo dropped his sight to the carpet, avoiding the look he was receiving.
"Your eyes did." He lifted one hand from the couch and gripped Duo's face, forcing him to look upward. "Say it."
"No." The voice was barely a whisper.
"Say. It."
"No."
Quatre growled as he released his face and slapped Duo. "I said that I want you to say it. I want you to say it now." He glared at the braided pilot and waited.
Duo put a hand to his face, then looked away, leaving his hand resting over the sting. "I said no."
"Dammit Duo." His teeth clenched as he took hold of his collar and jerked him to his feet. Pulling him close, he gave him a harsh kiss, biting at his lower lip and using his other hand to grip Duo's braid.
Duo whimpered, leaning into the kiss, then startled and pushed the blonde away. "Stop."
He held his grip but let him push away. "What?"
Duo shook his head, keeping his eyes focused on the ground.
Placing his hand back on Duo's jaw, he again forced the pilot to face him. "Stop avoiding me. Looking away counts." He backed him into the couch, sitting him down, then climbed on so he straddled Duo at the hips. He kept the braid wrapped around his fingers as he leaned close and began to nibble on Duo's ear, and down his neck.
Duo bit his lip, effectively shutting down the whimper trying to escape. He tensed and pushed Quatre back away from him. "No, Quatre."
"No, yourself." He leaned in again and began to trail small bites down the other side of his neck. His free hand slid down Duo's chest and back up, grazing his fingertips under the shirt and lifting it with him. "Now."
Duo watched the hand as it moved up his chest, unable to suppress the shudder running through his body. He grabbed Quatre's hips, pulling the other pilot closer to him before once again pushing him away, almost dumping the blonde in the floor.
Quatre growled and planted himself more firmly against Duo's hips. He took both hands and slid them up under the shirt and up to his shoulders, sliding it off quickly. "I felt that shudder. Don't lie to me." Leaning down he bit softly at the spot he'd left bleeding when they'd begun this mess in the hospital. This change in their relationship was dark, but exciting. And it worked for what he wanted, what he needed at that moment. His hands caressed Duo's bare chest before running his nails down his sides. "I dare you to tell me 'No' again."
Duo stood abruptly, dumping Quatre in the floor. "No."
He ground his teeth when he hit the floor. Reaching out, he took hold of Duo's ankles and yanked them out from under him, taking him down to the floor as well. "That was a mistake." He scrambled and climbed on top of the pilot and gave him another bruising kiss as his hands reached for Duo's belt.
"No Quatre." He pushed the blonde's hands away from him, struggling to sit up and dumped him in the floor again. "No."
"Don't tell me no." He bit at Duo's neck and continued his attempts to undress him. He needed this. And one way or another, Duo was going to cooperate with him. "You've avoided me for a week. I'm done with it."
Duo shoved the blonde backwards and stood, staring down at the blonde. Watching Quatre like that only made the feelings in him deepen and he bit his lip, torn between giving in and shoving the other away again.
Quatre frowned as he stood and pushed the braided pilot back into the wall. "I mean it." He placed a hand on each side of Duo's face and kissed him hard again. Keeping him pressed to the wall, he slid his hands from the pilot's face and down to finish what he started with both of their belts, one hand undoing the buttons on his own shirt. "You don't say no to me."
Duo grabbed the blonde's wrists, eyes pleading with him to stop, but his body responding to the touch.
He twisted his hands, releasing them from Duo's grip, and took hold of the other pilot's own wrists. Forcing them up over Duo's head, Quatre used on hand to hold them together up against the wall as his other hand trailed lazy circles over Duo's bare chest, then down, yanking the belt out of the pant loops in one swift go. Without giving him time to react, Quatre spun him around and pulled his hands down behind his back. He wrapped the end of Duo's braid around his wrists, then used the free belt to bind them all together, effectively preventing him from freeing himself. His hips pressed the pilot against the wall and he bit the back of Duo's shoulder hard.
Duo whimpered again as he was pushed to the wall, struggling to free his hands. "Quatre..."
"You had your chance to talk. But you chose to avoid me instead. I'm tired of your words." He removed his own belt, wrapping it around Duo's head as a gag and latching it behind. "As you once told me, you talk to fucking much." He flipped the pilot around and gave him one more bruising kiss before tossing him back onto the couch.
Duo flinched as he landed on the couch, hard. He shot Quatre a nasty glare, kicking his feet out effectively pushing himself backwards on the couch, away from the blonde.
"You're backing away again." He prowled closerd to the pilot on the couch as a wicked grin spread across his face. "I've got a few more of your own words for you." One hand pinned him by the shoulder as he climbed on top. Leaning down, he whispered in Duo's ear. "The others are gone. I've made sure they wont be back for a few hours." He shifted and nibbled on his other ear before continuing, "I just want to hear you cry, and it's going to hurt."
Quatre was going to regret this.
Regret leaving him tied on the fucking couch, where anyone could walk in and find him. If he wanted to be punished, then he would be punished. The blonde had fallen asleep - looking quite innocent sprawled out before him - but Duo was working quietly enough to not disturb him.
It was eerie how easily he was able to get Quatre's hands tied behind his back, even more shocking when he easily slipped the blindfold over his eyes. With a swift movement he grabbed the blonde up, hauling him to the bathroom at the end of the hallway.
With a rough toss he let Quatre fall to the ground, slamming and locking the door behind him. If he wanted to be punished so badly, then he would suffer, Duo would make sure of it. He grinned to himself as he heard the blond whimper, then turned and walked from the house so he wouldn't have to hear the screams.
"Duo?" Quatre chewed his lips as he wiggled himself up from where he'd landed hard on the floor. His voiced echoed hollow against the cold walls of the empty bathroom. He couldn't see, thanks to the black bandanna Duo had slipped over his eyes like a blindfold, but he could feel the cold porcelain against his cheek when he scooted to find the wall and smacked his face on the toilet.
His arms struggled against the duct tape used to bind his hands together behind him. Dammit. He could feel panic setting in as he struggled harder without success. The bastard had wrapped his hands completely, leaving him with no free fingers to wiggle his way out. Another whimper escaped his lips as he gave up and kept himself pressed against the wall. It would be ok. It's not like this was the same dark hole as before. No. It was just the bathroom. He couldn't help it as a tear ran down his cheek. At least last time he'd had Trowa to keep him company.
Trowa.
That name sent shockwaves of a different emotion through him. Trowa was the reason he'd gotten himself into that mess. Wasn't he? He let his mind follow that train of thought, rather than dwell on just how dark it was in there with the blindfold. Not that he would have been able to see anything anyway. The lack of the telltale hum from the light told him Duo had left him bound, blind and in the dark of the smallest bathroom in the house. He bit his lip and turned back to his thoughts of Trowa.
The taller pilot had laid out his heart to him in that little shelter in the wreckage of the building. Trowa had kissed him and he kissed him back. Even if he thought they weren't going to make it out, he shouldn't have done that. He was with Duo. That's why he was doing this, after all. To punish himself. He shouldn't have let what Trowa said get to him like it had.
It shouldn't have become as big of an issue as it did, but he let his guilt get the better of him once more. He felt terrible that for so long, Trowa had been left to watch as he was with Duo. Or give words of advice and help when asked. That's why he felt so bad about the kiss. He had led him on just when he thought it was the end, then went back to Duo. Duo who was too nice to be angry with him for having feelings for Trowa. Idiot. He deserved whatever it was Duo dished out to him. He was lucky that Duo still was with him. That first day in the hospital, he shouldn't have come back to him. Duo should have just kept walking and left him alone then and there. But he stayed. And because of that, Quatre deserved every ounce of punishment Duo could deal him.
He bit his lip as another whimper escaped. No. That had to stop. He'd be back soon to let him go anyways. Duo always returned and released him. Always. He could feel the dark walls looming over him where he sat crammed against the wall between the toilet and the cabinets. The dark echoed around him as he waited. Eating at him and taunting him. He shook and whimpered again before clamping his teeth down hard on his lips. He deserved it. And he would take his punishment in silence.
The house was quiet as he entered, too quiet. Trowa gave a quick search through the house before he heard it. A whimper from the bathroom. He paused in front of the door and knocked. "Quatre?"
He jumped as the knock shattered the quiet of the bathroom. His head smacked into the base of the toilet and he whimpered in pain.
"Quatre?" Trowa knocked again. "Are you ok?"
What should he say? Yes. No. Maybe? Biting his lip he squirmed until he was facing the wall away from the door and lay down on his side. He certainly didn't want Trowa to open the door and see the mess he was over being locked in the dark. That would only lead to more questions he didn't want answered.
"Quatre, answer me please, or I'm coming in."
"No."
"Are you ok?"
"Mhmm."
"I'm coming in."
He bit his lip, but stayed silent. Duo hadn't come to let him out before the others were back. And honestly, at this point he didn't know how long he'd been in there. If it had been minutes or if it had been hours. He resigned himself to the fact Trowa was going to come in. And then he would deal with Duo over this matter of leaving him alone in the dark
Trowa tried the knob and found the door open. He flicked on the light switch, pausing as he saw the blond tied up in the corner. "Dammit, Quatre." He knelt and began freeing the other's wrist and lowered the bandanna. "What happened?"
"Nothing."
He sighed and slowly pulled the blonde to his feet. "Looks like more than nothing to me."
"Just forget it." Quatre pushed past the taller pilot and muttered a quick, "Thanks." He had something to say to Duo about what he just went through in the dark there.
"Quatre." Trowa followed after him. "We need to talk."
"Not now." He stormed through the house, getting angrier with each room Duo wasn't in.
Trowa paused, heading back to the living room as he heard Wufei and Heero entering. He stopped in front of them, arms crossed, looking irritated. "We have an issue."
Wufei raised an eyebrow as he placed the bag in his hand on the counter. "What?" The blonde stormed past them as he continued his search, muttering something in Arabic under his breath.
Trowa quickly told them about Quatre as he made to follow the blonde again with a worried expression on his face. "We need to find Duo."
Wufei and Heero each nodded and left in search of the pilot.
Giving up on the inside of the house, Quatre made his way to the backyard to look out there. When he stepped outside, he found Duo with his head bowed over his hands and his back to him. He paused and watched the braided pilot for a moment, waiting for some sort of acknowledgement of his presence. When none come, he felt his frustration and anger rise exponentially. Stalking forward he took hold of the end of the braid and yanked Duo backwards in his seat. When he landed on his back Quatre noted a red mark beneath his bangs where the end of the gun in his hands had been resting. Violet eyes looked up at him blankly, then startled recognition crossed over them. "You PRICK. You fucking locked me in that dark room alone for HOURS!" He collapsed on top of him and pounded one fist into Duo's face.
Heero's head snapped around at the sound of shouting coming from outside. "Too late. Out back."
Duo slammed his palm upwards, feeling his hand connect with Quatre's head. He aimed the gun at the blonde as he stood, studying Quatre.
"What the fuck, Duo?" He glared at him and the gun now aiming for his chest.
Heero flung himself out the door right behind Trowa, Wufei not far behind. They skittered to a stop at that awaited them.
"Just stay Quatre." He turned the gun back so he could study the barrel, then pressed it to his temple hard enough he tilted his head slightly. "Is this what you want from me?"
A suicidal pilot was not what Quatre had been expecting to encounter when he went looking. "Of course I don't want you to kill yourself. What makes you think that?" He held his hands out and took a small step forward. "Put it down, Duo."
"Stop. Don't touch me." His hand shook a little and he fought to keep the gun against his head. "There is something inside of me." He glanced nervously to the side before his eyes met Quatre's. "Why let this eat me alive? Come pull the trigger, Quatre. Your hand belongs on this gun."
He froze at the panicked look in Duo's eyes and voice. A chill ran down his spine and he felt himself suddenly snapped out of his fit. "What is it?" Maybe if he avoided that last statement and went down another road of discussion he could distract Duo enough to get the gun away from him.
Duo let his eyes slide shut for a moment, then looked at Quatre clearly. "Myself."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm not who you think. I don't expect you to understand. Why are we doing this Quatre?"
"Why don't you try to explain to me. That might help us both figure that out." He stepped closer to the pilot and watched him. "What sort of answer are you looking for?"
"Quit coming towards me." He glared at the blonde. The finger on the trigger twitched and he took a step back from the blonde. "Why are we doing this?"
Trowa flinched as if he were going to move toward the two, but Heero placed a hand on his arm. "Wait. He's calm. Don't startle him or we could make this a lot worse than it needs to be." Wufei grumbled behind them, but waited. "I certainly hope you're right about this, Yuy."
Quatre shrugged. "Each for our own reasons I suppose. You seem to know mine quite well considering the way you left me in that bathroom." He couldn't help the flicker of irritation that crossed his face, but it vanished just as quickly as it had come when he thought of it himself. He deserved the punishment. But what was it that had Duo so upset? He had nothing to be angry about. "You've done nothing wrong that I'm aware of. So whatever reason you have is your own."
"It is..." He lowered the gun, turning his head away. "I love you Quatre, but I won't drag you down with me. And I'll never be what you need."
The words ripped through his chest. "I... Duo..." He felt himself walking forward again. Without a second thought to the order to stay, he wrapped his arms around Duo's waist and pulled him into a tight hug, burying his face at the base of his neck. "Don't do this to me. Don't. Please."
Duo let the gun fall from his hand as he wrapped his arms around the blonde. "Every time I touch you... I can't do this."
"Then don't. Just let us be. Please." Quatre turned his head and whispered against Duo's neck. "We can do it. I promise."
"Not like this." Duo pushed him back. "I can't do this any more." He put a hand on the side of Quatre's face. "You're better than that Quatre, don't do this to yourself." He let his hand fall as he turned away.
"Wait." He grabbed hold of Duo's wrist and pulled him back. "We'll be ok." He could feel himself fighting the tears as he looked into those sad, violet eyes. "But you're right. We both need some time. Just don't let this be the end of us. Please?
He stared at the abandoned gun for a long time before his eyes turned towards Quatre's and he smiled. "Is that really what you want? Or is that just you being greedy again?"
It felt like the wind had been knocked from his lungs. What was the answer to day? He knew it a moment ago, but now he doubted himself. Was that what made him cling so desperately to Duo's arm? Greed? He bit his lip and felt the arm slip from his fingers. "Yes. Both, maybe?"
"I can't say no to you." Duo turned back to him, pulling him into his arms. "But we both know what you want. Every time we go through this."
"Then don't say no. Don't leave and we can figure this out." He could feel himself being pulled into a hug, but did nothing to react. He was still so lost in his own thoughts. "Even if I am being greedy, can't we figure this out?" The answer already hung between them where before the whole mess had started, nothing had been between them. Holding his breath, he waited for the inevitable.
"We already know." Duo sighed. "Quit punishing yourself for a change of heart Quatre and leave me."
"I can't leave you."
"I'm sorry." He gave the blonde a gentle kiss to the forehead. "I can't hurt you any more." He pulled away and started back towards the house, ignoring the others.
Quatre watched as Duo walked away, unable to move and powerless to stop him. Slowly he sank to to the ground and sat, staring into nothing. Absently his hand brushed the gun where Duo had left it and he picked it up and stared at it. The safety was off and he knew by the weight it was empty. He sat and stared at it, feeling as alone as he'd felt that first night when Duo walked from the hospital room.
He'd finished packing, but he didn't need more than a duffel and his back pack anyway. Duo gave one glance around the room before leaving, closing the door quietly behind him.
Trowa leaned against the wall with his arms folded over his chest. He'd known this was coming all week. It was a matter of time as to when. Seems that time had come. "The only thing you could be doing with a bag at 3am without saying goodbye, would be running away."
Duo froze with his hand still resting on the door knob. "You can read me that well, huh?"
"Hm." A smirk played on his lips as he noted the startled expression on Duo's face. "So you're not saying anything to anyone, then?"
"Just you, obviously." He turned to face the taller pilot. "I can't stay here. I can't..." He shook his head. "Did you need something?"
"I was up already and heard noise." Trowa studied Duo's face. "I'm not going to stop you, but you do realize what this is going to do to Quatre, right?"
"We both know you'll be there to pick up the pieces." He turned his eyes to Trowa's. "And I hope you will. He'll need you, Tro."
"That may be. But I wont lie when I say I'm not happy that it's pieces I have to be concerned about picking up rather than a whole." He raised an eyebrow and studied Duo's face.
"What room do you have to be angry with me? You kissed him, you deal with him and his feelings. If I stay neither of us can heal. Here's your chance." He gave a punch to Trowa's arm and walked off down the hall. "Maybe I'll see you all around someday."
"I'm not angry. Just not happy. Whatever the case may be, take care. He'll never heal if something should happen to you. No matter what the situation may become." He followed Duo down the hall and continued to watch him.
Duo stopped in front of the door. "Quatre doesn't need me." He opened the door and walked away, refusing to look over his shoulder. "Later Tro."
Trowa watched from the doorway. "Drop Wufei a line. Remember you still have friends here."
Quatre slipped from his room when he heard their voices trail down the hall. He peeked around the corner as Duo opened the door, ducking back before either one could catch him. When he heard footsteps, he moved from his hiding place and watched as Duo disappeared out the door. He bit his lip and quietly moved forward until he could wrap his arms around Trowa's waist. No point in hiding since the taller pilot probably already knew he was there. "So he's gone?"
Trowa tensed slightly. "Yeah. You going to be ok?"
The fabric of Trowa's shirt was soft and soothing against his face which was still hot from crying in silence earlier. Shaking his head and wrapping his arms tighter around Trowa he murmured, "Make me forget. Please." He pressed his cheek against the pilot's back and just held on like it took all his strength to stand there like that. "Make me forget all of it. Him and this pain."
He turned slowly, pulling the blonde close to him. "Depends on if this is Quatre asking me."
"Does it matter?"
"Yes."
"Please." Quatre kept his hands wrapped around Trowa's waist and just stood there. "Just, please. It hurts. I'm so tired of hurting over both of you. Make it stop."
"Only you can do that."
"I can't."
"We do this my way."
He didn't say anything, only clung to the pilot's shirt like he had nothing left. There was nothing left, anyways.
Trowa nodded and picked Quatre up. "We do it my way, on my time. Tonight you rest."
Quatre sat at his desk frowning at the papers scattered all over. He simply could not concentrate on the work at hand. A sigh escaped his lips as he folded his hands behind his head and leaned back, staring at the ceiling. What was the saying? 'It is better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all.' Whatever. Well, he'd loved, lost and been rejected in the span of time most people take simply to fall into love. His teeth ground as he bit back the frustration and hurt from the whole mess. He hadn't been paying attention to his surroundings, just absently counting the dots on the ceiling when something yellow entered his vision. His frown slowly broke into a small smile when he recognized just what the intrusion on his brooding was: a single, bright yellow daffodil offered from a friend.
[1] Can any of you guess what movie Duo is watching? It's Foxy's favorite.
That's all for daffodils. There is another story coming up in the series. We've already started it... so expect to see it in the next day or two. Thanks for sticking with us! Expect more angst AND FLUFF! In the next fic.