Kate couldn't think about the current condition of her partner as she would dive for their literal life line. She kept her self low and gave herself a few seconds of deep breathing to clear her mind. Get the phone. That was the task at hand here. One last deep breath, she exhaled slowly, and she was off. She stayed low, exposing as little of her body as possible. She held the cookie sheet up for protection. Though odds of it stopping a sniper bullet were very low, it at least provided cover so her vitals were harder to target. She quickly picked up the phone from the ground, diving and rolling behind the knocked sideways table for cover. Gun fire rang out, but thank god, so did the sound of sirens. Someone else had heard the gunfire. That would scare him off for sure. A hole in the table indicated she was lucky she wasn't hit and the bullet had flown past her head just to the left of her. Knowing Maddox couldn't waste any more time or he'd be caught, she tumble dove back into the house and rushed back to Castle.
She found him slumped against the cupboards where she had left him but he was limp, his jaw hung slack, eyes closed. She fell to her knees, eyes filled with tears immediately "Oh God, please no." She whispered afraid to touch him. "Rick?" She asked as if he was supposed to give an answer and she crawled up to him. "Castle, no." she wimpered. She had to check his vitals, had to know. She put the phone down beside her, then reached her hand up to his neck and felt for his pulse. It was very weak, but he was alive. She then raised her ear to his mouth and could feel very faint breathing. Kate wiped tears from her eyes and suddenly her phone caught her attention.
"Kate, oh god what's going on? Kate? Answer please?" It was the voice of the M.E. on the phone screaming for her. She had heard everything and was forced to listen helplessly. Kate picked up the phone, panic rising in her again. She was losing her head, all of this was too much.
"Lanie Castle's been shot." She sputtered out quickly. "Twice." She croaked finally, breaking down into tears again. In all the years they had been partners, she had tried so hard to protect him and keep him safe. When he got the Kevlar vest with "Writer" on the back she had played up annoyed but was really relived. It was just one more line of protection for when he wouldn't listen. But now, she had failed him and that guilt ached her to her bones.
"Okay, I called police from a land line they should be there soon. Where's he been shot sweety?" The M.E. was quick to respond in an emergency and had the message relayed in no time.
"Yeah I heard the sirens. In the back but it exited his chest and stomach. It's bad Lanie I don't think he's going to make it." She choked on the end of her sentence.
"Katherine Beckett you get a hold of yourself this instant or that man is going to die." The M.E. was harsh but could tell she needed to be. Her friend had lost it.
Kate swallowed hard but understood. A weak "Okay." was all she could muster up.
"Now, I am going to get off the phone with you. You are going to inform the paramedics where you are and keep pressure on his wounds. You with me?" The M.E. instructed her, cool and calm, and Kate was thankful for it. It brought her back her focus and she knew what she needed to do.
"Okay, yeah." She said calmly. "I'll call you after." She told her friend quickly.
"Good girl." Lanie said sensing the change of tone in Kate's voice indicated she had her head back. "Now Javi is with me. I'm sending him to go get Ryan and little Castle... Don't you argue with me Javier Esposito. It is not the time. Castle's been shot. Now Go!" Kate could hear the M.E. command their friend. "Now, you go too honey. Do your thing. We'll be in touch." and with that the two women hung up their phones and went to work.
Kate immediately got a hold of the paramedics and stayed on the line via speaker phone till they arrived. She kept her hands planted firmly against his chest but there was so much blood. It scared her. He was so pale he almost looked dead as all color had drained from his face. Her hands began to shake as she was losing it again. This couldn't be happening. It was a dream. A nightmare. The sound of the Medics at the door brought her back. She shot up and ran to get to them. They rushed in with all their gear and Kate was forced to watch as they loaded him up. She broke down again. An officer had to hold her back as the ambulance drove off. She wasn't allowed to ride with him and would have to follow in squad car. She screamed for him, unable to take what was happening anymore. Then she collapsed into the arms of the restraining officer having given up. The older male officer picked her up of the ground and helped her get her feet till he could guide her to his cruiser and they followed in hot pursuit.
Once there, Kate rushed through guards and other hospital staff. She had to get to him, to see him. She rounded a corner and found him being wheeled into an ER operating room. In that moment, time stopped for her. He had flat-lined. "No" was all she could utter before the guards were on her, removing her, kicking and screaming. "Castle!" she screamed now inconsolable. The hospital guards took her to a small five by five room used for talking to families, crisis victims, and in this case, solitary confinement.
Kate had lost all senses. They had taken her mother. It took her years to be able to move on from that but she was trying. They tried to kill her. She could deal with that. She was willing to throw her life on the line for this before. But then she did want to live, wanted a real life and he showed that to her. Now they were taking him away from her. That was the one thing she couldn't handle. She screamed at no one, smashing her fists against the walls, causing small dents to appear. There were already a few from others who had been confined so why not add a few more. She finally collapsed into a chair, sobbing. She had been defeated and this was all her fault. Whats worse was the more she thought about it, the deeper the realization became just how much this was her fault. If she had have listened to him and stopped when he told her. "Oh god what have I done." She said to herself in the silent room.
The older police officer who drove her here had been keeping guard at the door and when he noticed she had settled down, he decided to go in and see how she was doing. "Kate?" The man asked hesitantly. "You okay?" He asked since she seemed to not be lashing out at the world anymore.
Kate just shook her head no. The officer knew what she meant though and sat down on a chair across from her. "Now don't you worry. We're gunah catch whoever did this and..." He began the usual spiel but Kate couldn't fall for that speech. Not when she'd delivered it so many times. She cut him off venom in her tone.
"Don't you dare try and give me any of that bull crap." She told the officer. She knew how it really was. This guy had no clue what he was up against. "He's a sniper and he's tried to get me before. I'm a former detective. He's been hired to kill me." She snapped at him.
The officer was taken back by this information. She knew more about this case then he did, more about the shooter than their team would probably ever be able to find out. "I'm going to need a statement from you and everything you know, when you're ready." He told her, now understanding the situation a little better as everything sank into place. He wasn't finished with Kate yet though. "There's an elderly woman out there who's pretty distraught. Says her sons been shot and she wants to speak to his girlfriend. I'm assuming that's you?" The officer asked though he was pretty sure since Castle was the only gunshot victim in the past little while. Kate sat up. She had completely forgot his mother was still in town. Fear shot through her, would his mother blame her for this? It was her fault after all. The officer must have seen her reaction because of his next question. "You okay to go talk to her? Or would you prefer I keep her away?" He was trying to be understanding and sympathetic. Kate would have to apologize for snapping at him.
"No, I can see her." She told him and the officer started to get up. "Hey, I just wanted to say I'm sorry, for snapping at you like that. I'm just..." She finished her sentience as a heavy sigh escaped her. She didn't know what she was anymore. Lost just didn't seem to cover it.
"Don't worry about it." The cop told her with a smile before opening the door to let her out. The hospital guards eyed her eerily, waiting for her to explode again. It felt weird being so heavy watched. Kate didn't have much time to think about it before Martha noticed her.
"Kate, What on earth has happened, are you Okay? Alexis said Richards been shot? Is it sever?" the questions came flying from Castle's mother and Kate honestly didn't have the heart to answer.
She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear to buy her some time but there was no other way to put it. She started to cry again, tears tricking down her cheeks as she broke the news to Martha. "It's really bad." Kate sputtered out and looked down at her hands and clothes covered in his now drying blood. "It was the sniper, Martha I'm so sorry." and she broke down again. To her surprise Martha Rogers wrapped her in her arms and rocked her back and forth. She seemed to hold no resentment towards Kate for what had happened. It dawned on her then that Castle was a lot more like his mother than he cared to admit. They were both so understanding, and compassionate. Kate was thankful his mother was here.
She spent the next several hours recalling the events of that morning to police and Martha, and a nurse was kind enough to find her something to wear and take her to wash up. Eventually, the others arrived from the city and the crowd of them now huddled in the waiting room waiting for news. All except Alexis and Martha. They now occupied the very same room Kate was confined in earlier. When Alexis arrived she exploded her full red headed furry on Kate.
"Where is she. I'm going to kill her!" Alexis had shouted as she came through the hospital doors. Ryan and Esposito on either side of her trying to calm her down. It was nice to see they'd pulled together for the emergency. If only there wasn't the emergency. When Alexis did find her she blew up even more.
"You." She shouted at her. "After all my Dad has done for you. This is your fault! He's going to die because of you!" Her voice cracked with rage and grief.
"Alexis" Ryan tried to intervene but she wouldn't listen
"No! I wont put up with this!" She screamed. "She shouldn't be here. Dad shouldn't be here. It's because of her he is. I won't let you take him from me!" and with that Alexis lashed out trying to hit Kate and make her own anguish seem a little less. Ryan and Esposito grabbed hold of the young girl's shoulders and picked her up off the ground flailing and screaming.
"Over here." Called one of the hospital guards, indicating Kate's former temporary prison. The boys took her there to cool off. Martha now sat with her trying to help but from the sounds of the muffled yells coming from the room, it wasn't going well. The rest of them were waiting. Ryan tried to get Kate to eat something but to no avail. She just shook her head and stared at the tiled hospital floor. She hadn't spoken a word since Alexis yelled at her. She couldn't. Not when she knew Alexis was right and had every right to hate her for it.
Lanie had tried to consul her. "Alexis is just scared, she'll come around." She told Kate, patting her friends knee but nothing. "Castle will make it through. He's a fighter. He never gave up on you after all right?" She said with a kind smile. Lanie's words were meant to comfort, but it hurt Kate more as she remembered how she'd pushed him to give up on her only about a week ago. Now Lanie gave up. She knew there was no helping her. She decided to go see where Javi had wondered off to instead. Leave Kate to be Kate.
Kate sat leaning forward, elbows resting on her knees, her head in her hands, still silent. Castle had been in surgery for hours with absolutely no news and all this waiting was making her eat away at herself. Bit by bit running the words through her head. Your fault. You failed. He's better without you. You should have never met him. How stupid could you have been. The walls were coming back up again but in a whole new way. With each self degrading thought, Beckett placed a brick around her heart until she could wall it back up again in an attempt to protect the ones she loved and herself.
"Kate Beckett?" The voice was unfamiliar and brought her out of her inward spiral to a dark place. The construction of the walls stopped for now. Her head shot up to see a doctor in a white lab coat holding a clip board. "Somebody's calling for you." He said with a smile on his face that could mean only one thing. He made it. The rest of the group let out a collective sigh of relieve and hugged each other and Kate. Esposito helped her up to encourage she go to him.
"Well take care of his family. Go to him. You heard the doc. He wants you." He reassured her and with a nod and a few more hugs, Kate followed the doctor down a few halls to where Castle was recovering.
A/N: So ya, Crap now ensues. I have lots of really big and little plans plot wise so well have to see where they take me. Honestly, with all the plot I've come up with, the story is beginning to write itself. Don't worry there will be more smut eventually. Let the poor man heal first. While you wait, if I'm bored or stuck one day I do plan on going back and writing the scene I ended so abruptly as I felt the blush creep up on my face. Thanks again for follows and reviews. You guys drive me! Keep reviewing! I'll write more later!