Ok so i did the year but i jumped around alot like you are seeing little bits and parts of everything coming together, this is mostly Bella we dont see much of the Cullens here I'm sorry don't flame me for it

I dont own twilight

By Myself Chapter 9 – Learning To Be

Month One – September

Bella POV

I was sitting on the couch watching the news waiting for Mia to come back after staging my apparent death. I feel horrible for doing what we were doing to Charlie, Renee, Jacob, everyone especially Edward. But I wanted control before I even went near Forks. I don't want to go on a mass killing spree. The Volturi would love that. Then we heard a car pull up the small dirt drive. Mia came in the door throwing her bag aside as he came to attack her with another one of his hugs.

"Hey sis did you miss?" he asked.

"Oh yes, the peace and quiet was terrible," she teased.

"Mia, be nice," Teri scolded. Since I came back as a vampire they had be very open with me. I guess I wasn't a worry to them anymore. "Thirsty?" She asked her daughter whose eyes were almost black. She nodded.

"Come on newborn jump into some sweats and I teach you not look like helped out with a chainsaw massacre." I was already in sweats it was the only thing left in my bag that we pulled out of the car.

"I'm already," I said as I slipped on my converses.

"Take Peter Mia," Mike instructed. "He could help teach her." Peter walked over to us. He was all proud and Mia was trying to hide her disgust. She loves her bro but still siblings are annoying at least from what I have heard.

"Fine, come on," we walked out into the woods and Began to break after a couple of moose. One of Peter's favorite I learned her taught me this round. We were hiding in the bushes and thickets listening and watching.

"Now Bella," Peter whispered so slow I'm sure no human or animal could have heard him. "You know you are supposed to go with your instincts but if you don't want to get dirty just watch keep an eye on what your actually doing or you will look like the bloody mess you were last time. Try and stay aware. You ready?" I nodded I was eager to get going. Peter lunged at one, Mia following and me trailing behind. This time I tried to keep a hold on my sanity. I didn't hug on to animal like last time I kept a distance both feet plants on the ground hovering over the animals open neck taking in its sweet blood. Similar to deer but a little different less sweet. When I was confident the animal was dried of every last drop I stepped back and surveyed my clothes. My shirt was covered but my pants were clean.

"It will get easier," Mia said. "You're doing better and this only your second hunt."

"You are surprisingly calm for new born," Peter commented who was standing next to Mia. Both were spotless except for some dirt. "Maybe that's her ability."

"The ability to be extremely calm?" I asked. I doubted it.

"Who knows, but lets do a little more hunting and there is this clearing near the house we can all work together on finding that out," Mia suggested. We continued to do a little more hunting. The sun was out and adjusting to the sparkle off Mia and Peter's skin. I could make out every part of the rainbow now against their skin. I looked down at myself once or twice but I haven't looked into a mirror. I knew that there were going to be two red demon eyes staring back at me I wasn't truly prepared for that. When we were done we sat in the field next to the house and debated on my power.

"Maybe she can make things blow up!" Peter suggested. Mia and I both rolled ours eyes. I messed with his hair. "Hey!" he put up a fuss. When I finish he playfully scowled and growled as he tried to fix it.

"I don't think that would be good, no matter how cool it would be," I said honestly. I think I would scare myself if that happened. "We know if I do have some sort of ability it will have to mental because no one can read my mind and you can't read my memories," I stated.

"Well I think I know what we need to do," Mia said leaning back looking up at the darkening sky.

"What?" I and Peter asked both curious.

"I think we need to go seeEleazar." Peters face lit up mine still was filled with confusion.

"How are we going to find him?" Peter asked.

"Yellow pages I guess but it is going to take forever," Mia complained slightly.

"Who is Eleazar?" I asked.

"He is a vampire who can read abilities, he will definitely help us."

"Well let's go find him," I said getting up and walking towards the house.

"I'm surprised you are not flipping out or anything," Peter said catching up to me.

"What were you expecting a murderous crazy person?" I asked.

"Duh," He said. I laughed then I picked him up and put him under my arm carrying sideways. "Hey! Let me down" I just laughed along with Mia as we walked into the house and shut the door of the cabin.

Edward POV

Nothing…Emptiness…Darkness. That's about sums my life up right now. I am nothing without Bella; my life is not but empty spaces; and the light in my life disappeared. I want to die I want to be with her. I had planned to go to the Volturi but my pixie of a sister saw it and they locked me in the basement and blocked the door. I really didn't see the need for keeping me around anymore but I think Esme would be deviated if she lost yet another child.

"Oh dearest brother!" Alice called from upstairs. Alice was unusually happy for the past few hours. I wonder what was getting her all happy no one else seemed too happy. The Basement door opened all blind light came from the doorway. Alice came down the steps all happy. "Stop sulking, Carlisle is bringing home some good news," She grabbed my hand and pulled me up the steps.

"Alice, just leave me alone," I begged her.

"Actually Edward I think you would like to hear what I have to say out of everyone," Carlisle was standing there waiting for us. "Everyone into the 'dining' room I think this is very important if we are going to survive this…first year." Carlisle and Alice were blocking their thoughts. I was ignoring them. We all were sitting at the prop table and Carlisle began. "I had a visit today while I was at work from an old traveling companion."

"And this we need to know, why?" Rose asked.

"She was the vampire who was with Bella." We were all silent.

"She?" Esme asked. Esme should not be worrying about who Carlisle might have dated in the past.

"Mia, she was nineteen when was changed with her seven year old brother. But I will explain that later the point is she had a little message for all of us." He looked over us. "She said expect an angel to return on September 13th. Mia is a very spiritual person. I really don't know what she means but I think we can all wait until then. To see what she means."

"'An angel will return on September 13th.' That doesn't make sense Carlisle," I said.

"Edward I know you are not religious but I think she means something will visit us on that date. We all know what that date is." Bella's birthday I thought. "So I think what someone out there is asking for you not to go the Volturi and try and get yourself killed until then." Everyone looked at me. Their thoughts were begging me for this time. The only angel in my life is dead. I watched her ashes be placed in the cemetery last week. But I guess Carlisle was just asking for time for the family so they are ready when I do kill myself.

"I'm not making any promises," I said. "But I will try." I would like to see a miracle happen. "Can I go now?" I asked. Carlisle nodded. I walked up the stairs to my room, I lived for six months in this hell before, and a year wouldn't hurt me more then I already hurt. You can't break shattered heart.

Month 4 – December

It took us from September till now to find this vampire named Eleazar. It took one private detective and a whole lot of people finder sites to get here. Now we were running in the direction of Denali, Alaska. I didn't know how close to forks it could actually be, I hoped Alice wouldn't see any of this. That would ruin it. We had called ahead of time letting him know we were coming and asking permission and for his help. He agreed quickly at seeing Mia and Peter again. We had rented a private cabin outside of the surrounding area. We still haven't tested me in large populated areas. I was learning to hunt better not. This whole month I only ruined one pair of jeans. Not bad for a new born. One bad thing as time passes my human memories are beginning to fade. But all my memories with vampires, werewolves and Edward are still clear in my mind. Mia also tried to pull old memories everyday and restored them but the block on my mind is just too strong for her to break. My new coven had been amazing with preparing me to go back to Forks. I saw my obituary over the internet and the article about my death on the Forks Newspapers website. I hated how I deserted everyone but I was still a monster a slightly tame monster but one none the less. We had gotten to the new cabin just before there was a knock on the door. Peter ran to open the door.

"Eleazar!" Peter cried hugging the tall dark haired man in the door way. HE was alone as far I could tell.

"Hello Peter, still hyper as before I see," he said as he stepped into the cabin. He looked straight at me. "So you are Izzy?" Izzy was my characters name. Carlisle knows a lot of vegetarian vampires so we wanted to be safe and not have our cover blown.

"Yes sir, you must be Eleazar," I held out my hand politely and we shook hands.

"Hello Eleazar," Mia stepped into the living room. Greeting him with a smile and a hug.

"Hello Mia, I'm sorry I didn't bring my family with me I didn't know how well behaved this new born was. How long have you been a vampire?" He was asked crossing his arms over the front of him observing me.

"This will be my fourth month I was changed on August 31st," I said like I had practiced. Mia warned me other vampires might ask me this.

"Interesting."

"We were wondering if you can tell if she has an ability, I can't read her memories," Mia said closing the door. We all gathered in the living room filling up the rented furniture that came with the house.

"She does have something, they call it a shield what kind of level a shield I don't know. I think maybe it I work with her a few days or even a few weeks are you willing to stay here?"

"Yes I think we can if it means Izzy can get proper training," Mike said. He and I never really spoke much I guess he could be cool sometimes.

"Alright let us begin."

Month 8 - April

Alice POV

"Come Izzy you can do it!" Mia cried. The was Bella or now know as Izzy was standing half a mile away from the girl on one side and a small boy another half a mile away. They were in a large open field surrounded by forest. The trees were ready to spread out their new leaves and fresh grass surrounded the edge of the field.

"One more time and my training with you is complete," Eleazar called out. Then it was quiet until the kid called out.

"I'm in!" The little boy Peter cried.

"Same!" Mia called. Mia ran and tackled Bella/Izzy. "You did it!" Peter jumped on top of them. And the Vision went blank.

I can't say I had these visions often because I don't it takes me hours to focus of them. When I tell my family I have them they all think I'm seeing things I wish I can see. Edward doesn't believe me; he says I'm torturing him. I don't get it! Why can't anyone believe me? I'm seeing things that are happening! I think I need to go on a trip to find them but there is a reason they are hiding so I have to expect that right? I have been keeping myself busy these months studying fashion but it doesn't interests me. I want my best friend and my sister back. But I had to wait 5 more months and could wait until then. But Edward could he?

Month 10 – June

Bella POV

We had just finished another hunt in our home back in Canada. I had worked on my powers with Eleazar and his amazing family. Turn out I have three kinds of shields. One is a defense shield explaining why my mind couldn't be hacked. Now I can shrink it to let people in or I can protect people in a half mile radius. The second is a force shield which I can force people away, I'm told it is like get hit with a ton of brick and getting flown backwards. The third is a power shield. I can stretch a specials shield around a vampire with another ability and use it. That is the weakest; I have been working harder on the others. There wasn't one day I didn't miss Edward. Everything reminded me of him and went into the woods just to be alone with my thoughts and acted like he was there with me. But I dammed us to this year without each other I wanted complete control.

"Oh. My. God. Bella!" Mia was staring at me in shock. Then she tackled me into a hug.

"Um, Mia what's up?" I asked her. She released me jumping up and down like crazy

"You eyes!" she cried. Had they finished being blood red? I ran back to the house and into the bathroom with the full body mirror. There they were. My eyes were a golden topaz. Mia came in a put an arm around my shoulders. "You did it. A spitting image of a perfect beautiful vegetarian vampire," she said proudly. I looked at the two vampires that were staring us back in the mirror. I looked different. I was sorry for being vain but I was very pretty now. My hair was longer; my facial figures were more defined; and my body was perfectly skinny with curves where they were supposed to. "Now it is time for my ultimate resistance test," she was beaming. She was a good teacher. She did learn from the best.

"What would this ultimate test be?" I asked.

"I'm taking you to a hospital." Shit.

Month 11 – July

Bella POV

"I can't do this Mia," I complained as we got out of her new car. She bought a Jeep this time. She wanted to get something bigger in case I drove it.

"Yes you can," she linked her arm with mine and dragged me to the emergency room. She told me everything would be aright. She had taken me to the mall, a workout gym, and a park. All very populated and I did very well. But I think I wasn't ready for human blood just out in the open. "It is quick and painless we walk in and we walk out." The automatic doors opened and we were hit with the smell of fresh human blood. I tightened my grip on Mia as we walked forward. "It's alright it was a car crash, remember these people have family and lives you don't want their blood." I closed my eyes after a human covered in blood was rushed to the O.R. Mia guided me the rest of the way until I heard the automatic doors open back and the fresh night air filled my senses. "You can open your eyes now. It's over," She promised. I opened them and saw her smiling at me. "And now I have nothing left to teach you Bella. You are the tamest newborn I ever met. Are you ready to go home; back to forks?"

"More than anything."

and so we prepare for the return which i hope to type tomorrow

now please hit the little review button and send me a review!!