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The Girl In White Bandages: The True Confessions of Ayanami Rei

Ch. 13 After Effects

By Sesshy's Girl 00

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"Dr. Akagi?" I asked, my voice coming out in a soft whisper in the large room.

Dr. Akagi turned to face me a slight frown on her face. She was fidgeting slightly and her body was tense. Was I distracting her? "Yes, Rei? Make this quick I'm quite busy." She said irritably.

"Where is Reika? Her room is empty."

"She's dead." She snapped as if I should already know.

Dr. Akagi's blank expression never wavered when she said those words. Did she care? No, no one cared about me, expect for him. He was the only one who did.

I did not have to ask if there would be a funeral for my sister. There would be one but it would all be faked, as we were, a mock funeral for a mock creation. Her body was long gone by now, returned to LCL.

I swiftly and silently left the room not bothering to ask any more questions. There was nothing more to say.

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Once Rei was gone Ritsuko let out a sighed and lit a cigarette. Placing it to her lips she breathed deeply inhaling the calming smoke she so greatly desired.

That girl was going to give her a heart attack one of these days if Gendo didn't do one of them in first.

Ritsuko took another lungful of air before she turned back to her report on the fourth child's death last night. As she worked her mind wandered over the events from two days ago that had ultimately done the unlucky girl in.

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From where she lay on the other side of Unit One's hand Reika moaned and tried to speak. Her voice was too soft and was carried away before I could hear what she had said however. I turned back to look Ikari-kun simply because I felt the need to see his face and know he was real. I had been trapped in there for so long.

A small painful smile crossed Ikari-kun's face. He seemed so unbelievably sad. Was I the cause of his suffering? I didn't want to be. I never desired to cause anyone pain, least to of all him. He had been nothing but kind and helpful to me.

Ikari-kun placed his hand against my cheek. "You look cold Ayanami."

I couldn't help the small smile that came to my lips. He was still worried about me. I had not been forgotten during the time I had been unconscious. It made me happy to know that at least someone had cared about me.

Ikari-kun shuttered and a tear escaped from his eye, rolling down his face. His arms tightened their grip around my body. "Rei..."

The way he said it, that single word held so much meaning and emotion. I, I loved the way he said my name. Ikari-kun made it sound as if my name belonged to someone special, unique and worthy of attention, of love.

The thought hit me; did Ikari-kun consider me worthy of his love, of being human?

I wanted him too, more then anything else I prayed he would.

Ikari-kun smiled at me as more tears fell from his eyes. I completely shifted my body so that I was facing him. Ikari-kun hugged me tightly and I was thankful he did. I needed his strength.

It felt so good to be pressed warmly against Ikari-kun. There I was warm and safe with him protecting me. I let my eyes closed a wave of relief and weakness crossed over me. Ikari-kun kept me up, supporting my weight in his arms.

I felt the air stir behind me but I couldn't bear to turn around. I already knew what it was there. Leliel was returning herself to physical form. She was coming to take her revenge for having lost. "Ikari-kun. We, We must go now."

"Ayanami? What is that?"

"The angel."

There was nothing more that needed to be said. Ikari-kun released his hold on me and hurried over to where Reika lay. He gently picked her up in his arms and returned to my side. Meanwhile I had stood frozen in horror, watching Leliel reform.

"Ayanami let's go."

I turned to see that Ikari-kun was standing beside me holding my arm. I quickly shook the frozen fear from my mind and followed him back to Unit One's entry plug. It was the only hope for survival. If not I was dead and so were the others.

Ikari-kun pushed me in ahead of him inside the door. I moved forward towards the pilot's seat and the door slammed shut behind me. The plug was plunged into pitch-black darkness. I stumbled foreword through it to the chair in the center.

A few moments later the lights came on as synchronization was established. I could feel the presence of Yui Ikari weighing heavily on my whole being. She was not happy that my presence was once more inside Unit One. She didn't protest my being here however, probably because Ikari-kun was with me.

Ikari-kun placed Reika in the chair and the two of us stood side by side behind it. He placed his hand over mine and squeezed it gently. I smiled back at him. It felt good to have Ikari-kun at my side.

Through Unit One's enhanced eyes I could see Leliel floating above her black Sea of Durac. It was a chilling image that sent shivers up my spine. I did not want her near me again. She was furious that I had gotten my freedom and the angel's disliked being defied. Leliel was going to come after me and try to take me back under her control. I knew it beyond doubt.

"Don't worry. I'm here."

I felt a small sense of relief at his words. Ikari-kun would be there for me, he had promised. I was so glad I had him to give me support. It meant the world to me.

Leliel rose up to her full power and set her black void after us. Ikari-kun directed Unit One effortlessly out of the way. I shook myself out of my daze and worked to help him move Unit One back to cover Unit Two.

The red unit was unresponsive and I believed that Pilot Sohryu was unconscious after taking down Unit Zero.

Despite our differences, I was glad she had done that. She had freed me from Leliel's grasp. I had been saved again by Pilot Sohryu's actions. It appeared that I would have to thank her once this was over.

We lifted the red unit in our arms and carried her away from the angel's reach. We stopped once we were well away to analyze the situation.

The angel was free to attack NERV, us or both. This had to be prevented. We could not let humanity be destroyed by Leliel. "What should we do, Ayanami?"

I set my jaw as I thought over the question in my head. An idea came to me from the recesses of my mind. Yes, this might work. "Ikari-kun. We need N-2 mines."

"Why?"

"We are going to blow the angel up." I explained quietly.

Ikari-kun blinked in surprise but then he seemed to understand. He opened up a link to NERV command. Both Major Katsuragi and the Commander's face appeared on the other end. "What?" Commander Ikari boomed.

"We need N-2 mines, now!"

"Why?" Demanded the Commander's hard voice.

"Ikari-kun and I wish to destroy the angel by blowing it up with N2 mines." I stated firmly.

The Commander nodded sharply and the link was cut off. A few minutes later I heard the deep rumble of one of the launch shafts rising to the surface. It rose above ground level and came to a stop with a click. The door opened to reveal a large number of N2 mines ready to be deployed. "What now, Ayanami?"

I composed my thoughts so that I could explain what we needed to do to him. "We must toss these into the angel's black void. When they explode, the angel will die."

Ikari-kun nodded at me to show that he understood.

We moved to the supply locker and gathered up as many N2 mines as possible in Unit One's arms. Then we advanced cautiously to where the angel waited. It was time we ended this fight before things got out of hand. The angel had to be stopped.

We went as close to the edge as possible before we stopped. Ikari-kun and I looked at each other, then back at the angel. The two of us started to count down in sync, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and 0. Then we threw the N2 mines with everything we had at the black void.

The mines began to sink into the black void the instant they touched it. We turned and ran without looking back. It was obvious what would happen next. Leliel would be blown to pieces and we needed to get out of the way. Otherwise we'd be taken out too.

We scrambled over the next ridge to where we had left Unit Two. There was only time for us to cover ourselves against the blast before the shock waves reached us. Something pressed me hard against the ground covering me completely. Someone was screaming but I couldn't tell whom. Everything was too distorted.

The violence ended and everything became quiet. I lay still feeling a heavy weight pinning me down. I tried to breathe, feeling a dizzying numbness that pervaded my body. Carefully I raised my head to look around. This did me little good, as there was nothing to see. Everything was dark and blacked out.

Reika lay beside me. Her face was still blank with unconsciousness. It appeared that the explosion had not disturbed her. Reika must have been badly injured by Unit Zero's rampage. Rest would probably be the best thing for her.

It took me several moments to locate Ikari-kun. He was lying on my back knocked out by a blow to the head. Ikari-kun was the reason I couldn't move.

I carefully reached down and to see that he was okay. A quick check showed that he was.

I gently shifted his weight so that I could slide his body off my own. Then I got to my feet and took the pilots chair. I persuaded the reluctant Unit One to move her feet. Once she was standing I could see everything around through her eyes. The force of the explosion flattened everything for a short distance around leaving a flat barren landscape behind.

I blinked trying to adjust my senses to the stillness. I looked around to assure that Leliel was really gone. There was no sign of her anywhere. A sense of relief washed over me, she was gone. Leliel was dead.

I heard Ikari-kun groan painfully as he began to stir. He stood up and gingerly made his way over to me. Ikari-kun placed his hand on my shoulder. "Is it over Ayanami?"

"Yes. The angel is dead."

Ikari-kun squeezed my shoulder and we both started to smile. It was all over. We could feel it. A video communication link opened to reveal the faces of Major Katsuragi and the Commander. "Return to NERV." Stated the commander's voice coldly.

"Great job guys." Major Katsuragi added.

She beamed happily at back. I could see the lines of relief and fatigue etched on her face. She tried to wave but stopped and winced in pain. "I'll see you when you return."

The link was disconnected and silence returned. I looked over at Ikari-kun and the two of us nodded wearily. Then we turned our gaze in the direction of NERV and we began the process of collecting the other two Eva's before heading to the nearest retrieval shaft.

Unit Two was in rough shape after the fight but Unit Zero was worse. Her arm was missing and her armor was damaged in several places. It appeared that I would not be piloting for some time. I was sad because I had only just come back from being unconscious.

An hour later all three Evas were secured in their cages. Ikari-kun and I listened to the reports coming in from NERV HQ as we waited for the recovery teams to let us out of the entry plug. Ikari-kun abruptly slammed the button and the voices died. I watched him in confusion, unsure of why he was so upset. He turned away from me and buried his head in his hands to cry.

"Ikari-kun. What's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"They made me do it. They made me kill him." He whispered hoarsely.

"Who?"

I did not understand. I had no memory of Ikari-kun injuring anyone recently.

"Touji, I killed him."

"Suzuhara-san?"

Suzuhara-san was killed? How? I didn't remember him being involved in the Eva battle. There was no was no way he would be dead, right?

"Fifth."

I turned sharply to glance at Reika but it looked like she hadn't moved. It sounded exactly like she had spoken, strange.

Wait, has she said fifth? Did that mean that Suzuhara-san was the fifth child? There was no way. I stood silently for several minutes letting the information sink in. It was all so unbelievable.

Beside me Ikari-kun went through several emotions during the course of a couple seconds. It ended with him curled in a ball sobbing. I gently placed my hand on his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him. "It is over. Suzuhara-san, you don't know that he's dead."

That much I knew to be true. I didn't remember anyone of the radio saying that the fifth child was dead. This made it highly probable that he was still alive.

Ikari-kun looked over at me, tears running down his face. "You weren't there, Ayanami. I crushed the entry plug with my own hand."

"No one said he was dead."

"You don't know that. I do."

Ikari-kun bowed his head as a fresh wave of tears began to roll down his face. He embraced me and buried his head in my shoulder. 'Tell me, Ayanami, please. Tell me it's going to be okay."

"Everything will be fine, Ikari-kun."

There was a squeak, as the door was pulled open. Light flooded in and after a moment I was able to make out the face of Major Katsuragi. She smiled when she saw us and quickly climbed inside the entry plug.

I heard her footsteps splashing across the LCL entry plug and the next thing I knew she was embracing us in a warm hug. I found myself being crushed between Ikari-kun and the Major's chest. It was discomforting to be in such a position.

"Where's Reika?"

I pointed directly to the spot where Reika lay unconscious in the ground. The Major's eyes became wide with fright and concern. "Ritsuko, get the medical team in here quick!"

The major released us and hurried over to Reika. She checked for a pulse and breath. She found what I already knew; Reika was alive, for now. She was weak and badly injured so it was possible that she wouldn't live for long.

The major straightened as the medical team rushed in with a stretcher. They gently lifted Reika from the LCL on the floor and placed her on the stretcher. Then they carried her out and she disappeared.

Major Katsuragi came back over to us and put her hands on our shoulders. "Come on guys. Ritsu will want to check you out before you can go home."

She led us out of the entry plug to Dr. Akagi, who was waiting for us below. The Doctor had her head bandaged and the lines on her face her unusually visible. She looked worn out and . . . old . . .? Her eyes focused on me as we approached. "Rei?"

There was a note of uncertainty and fear in her voice when she said my name. I nodded to her and met her gaze. Doctor Akagi sighed deeply and directed me towards a nurse who was standing off to the side. "Rei, I want you to go with her. Shinji come with me."

I gave Ikari-kun one last tentative smile before I turned and walked over to the nurse. She escorted me to one of the hospital rooms and left me with a hospital gown. I changed into it silently and efficiently. I was still somewhat bothered by Pilot Ikari's reaction. He looked so . . . so distraught. I kept seeing his face over and over in my mind. I wished that I had been better able to comfort him when he had been crying.

It wasn't long before Lt. Ibuki and Doctor Akagi came in to see me. They spent the rest of the day running me through a billion different tests to check both my physical and mental state. Sometime late that night they confirmed that I was now free of Leliel and had a clean bill of health. Before they released me I finally got up the courage to ask about Reika and Suzuhara-san.

Dr. Akagi told me that Reika had been completely depleted after her running thing they had had to sedate her and hook her up to a temporary respirator. Her condition was precarious and it wasn't clear what kind of shape she would be in if she survived.

Suzuhara-san was alive but also in rough shape after the battle. He had lost most of his left arm due to the damage it had received. Both of his legs and his chest were in a cast now as well. Despite the severity of his injuries Dr. Akagi seemed to think that he would make a full recovery.

After that she discharged me and I made my way to Reika's room. Inside I found Reika lying silently on the bed, dressed in a hospital gown and connected to multiple machines. I sat in the chair beside her bed, listening to the rhythmic beep of her heart monitor. It felt awkward but I knew she had been looking out for me when I had been unconscious so I felt it was my duty to be here for her. Gingerly I picked up her hand and cradled it in my own. "Don't worry, sister. I'm here for you."

It was different using that word but it seemed right because we were. She was . . . my family; more than Commander Ikari or anyone was to me. I adjusted the covers so they covered her better and squeezed her hand. I decided that I was going to look after her.

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The next morning Pilot Sohryu awoke me. "Morning, Wonder Girl. Welcome back."

I blinked sleepily in the bright morning light. Somehow my brain began to function and I managed to mumble something in reply. The sun was burning my eyes and I had to look away before I went blind. I would need to take my medication as soon as possible. "Late night?" She asked.

I nodded quickly. I had spent several hours sitting here before I had fallen a sleep. Pilot Sohryu seemed to know that before I ever spoke a word. She handed me a shirt and shorts. "Go take a shower and get yourself something to eat." She directed me.

I looked down at what she had handed me. It appeared that she had given me her clothes. I was amazed that she had so willingly given me something of hers. Why was she being so kind?

I turned to thank her but Pilot Sohryu was already gone, the door left open behind her.

It was then that I noticed that Reika was gone. She must have been taken off for tests of some sort I decided. Comforting myself with that, I shook my head and rose to my feet. Then I went off to find the nearest shower.

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"Well, doctor Akagi. Tell me? What's the fourth's status?"

"I'm afraid her lungs were severely compromised by the running she did. I'm going to have to hook her up to a more permanent respiration system just to keep her alive. Putting her in an Eva is out of the question; the strain of piloting would most likely kill her. We should stop work on Unit Five. She'll never pilot again."

"I see. Then by all means halt construction on unit five imminently. Prepare to eliminate her tonight."

"Yes, sir."

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After my shower I went to the commissary to have breakfast. I hadn't realized how hungry I was at first but I could feel it now. Dr. Akagi had warned me last night that I would feel unusually hungry and weak for some time until my body became used to performing normal activities again. It would seem her prediction was correct.

When I left the line with my food I found my fellow pilots there, along with Class Representative Horaki-san and Aida-san. All four of them were usually sombre and intent on the food before them.

It was Aida-san who noticed me first. He smiled slightly when he saw me and called me over. "Ayanami-san. It's good to see you again. Come join us."

"Hai."

I sat down in the empty seat between Aida-san and Horaki-san. The others watched me take my seat and then returned to what they were doing. The solemn mood was even more apparent after I had joined them than before. I wondered if this meant that Reika and Suzuhara-san's prognosis' were worse then what I had been told.

"How are you feeling Ayanami?" Ikari-kun asked.

"I feel fine."

"That's good."

Aida-san turned to me before Ikari-kun or I could say more. "Does it feel good to be back?"

"Yes, it does."

Beside me Horaki-san looked at her watch and a panicked expression crossed her face. She rose sharply to her feet. "Suzuhara-san will be out of surgery soon. I should go back upstairs to wait on him." She explained quickly.

The others nodded and waved her off as she hurried out the door. I watched as her pigtails bounced around the corner behind her. It was only then that I remembered the fact she had feelings for Suzuhara-san. Apparently they were stronger then I realized.

Pilot Sohryu frowned with concern once Horaki-san was out of sight. She lifted her coffee cup to her lips and took a big gulp of the hot liquid. Then Pilot Sohryu began to gather up what was left of her breakfast. "I'm going after her. She shouldn't be alone."

Ikari-kun and Aida-san nodded in agreement and Pilot Sohryu went to catch up to Horaki-san.

With Pilot Sohryu gone an uneasy silence descended. None of us had the desire to talk. "Is something wrong?" I asked in an attempt to break the quiet.

"Touji and Reika needed some emergency surgery this morning and well, we're worried about them."

Both Reika and Suzuhara-san were being operated on. I hadn't expected to learn that over breakfast. I felt some of the other's sadness and concern begin to rub off on me.

"We'll go upstairs later, after we're all finished." Ikari-kun assured me.

Aida-san nodded and handed me a small CD. An eager smile spread across his face, forcing his worry to retreat to his eyes. "Watch this when you have time. I think you'll like it."

"Hai. Arigato Aida-san."

After breakfast the three of us went back upstairs to meet up with Pilot Sohryu and Horaki-san. We figured that they were in Suzuhara-san's room and we were right. They were sitting in folding chairs at his bedside.

Suzuhara was still unconscious from the surgery and was sleeping silently in his bed. I was both surprised and saddened by his condition. He looked worse then I expected him too, even after Doctor Akagi had described his injuries. Yet, he was still alive and he was fighting to remain that way. That gave me hope that he would be okay and his recovery would go as well as possible.

Horaki-san sat very quietly and still in her chair, gazing at Suzuhara, her expression full of sadness and joy. She was completely lost in her own world. Horaki-san leaned foreword and gently lifted Suzuhara-san's hand in her own. She mouthed something wordlessly and sighed.

Pilot Sohryu turned to us with an expression of mixed worry and concern. "Well, the rest of the stooges show up at last to see their fallen companion."

"Yes, we have. We never leave a comrade behind." Aida-san declared.

Aida-san's voice was almost too loud for the small room we were in and we all winced. There was a long awkward silence before any of us dared to say another word. Aida-san, Ikari-kun and I all found chairs and took seats with Pilot Sohryu and Horaki-san.

"Don't worry Hikari, Touji will be fine. You'll see." Pilot Sohryu insisted.

"I hope so." Horaki-san whispered.

Another pause took hold and Aida-san began to dig out his camera from his bag. He placed the camera to his eye and began to film us as we sat there. The distraction was enough to ease the tension in the room.

Suzuhara-san groaned painfully and his fingers began to move. Horaki-san's face brightened when she saw him stirring. She leaned over and brushed the hair from his face. Suzuhara-san's lips curled slightly at the gesture.

I had the feeling that they would want some privacy so I motioned the other's to follow me out of the room. At first none of them moved, then they seemed to catch on and they came quickly.

I lead the way up the stairs to the observation deck and let the others inside. I then followed them inside and made myself comfortable in one of the chairs. The other's followed my lead and took chairs of their own. Ikari-kun sat on one side while Aida-san was other. Pilot Sohryu took a chair on the other side of the room separated from the rest of us.

Pilot Sohryu sighed heavily as she took her chair, rubbing her temples slowly. "Should we go see if Wondergirl's sister is back yet?"

Ikari-kun and Aida-san nodded in response. There was a problem with that plan I realized. I turned my wrist over so that I could see the watch face. "When was Reika supposed to get out of surgery?"

"Noon, why?"

"Then we will have to wait for two hours. It is only ten."

We waited for the two hours until it was noon in relative comfort. Ikari-kun spent most of the time talking to Aida-san and me. Both were concerned about my wellbeing and glad to have me back after being in a coma for several weeks, Ikari-kun especially.

One the two hours were over we went down to Reika's room to see if she was back. Horaki-san and Suzuhara-san were engaged in a conversation now that the drugs had worn off.

We didn't find Reika when we went to check on her. The room was empty. After asking around we were told that Reika had been moved to a different room due to her critical condition. For some reason I didn't have a good feeling about what I had learned.

Ikari-kun took the lead and led us down to the room where we were told she was. However the door was locked and no one was allowed inside.

In defeat we made our way back to the observation deck were we had begun our journey. I felt uneasy that I had not been allowed to see Reika. Something in the back of my mind insisted that I should. I was concerned that something bad would happen to her if I weren't there.

"Ikari-kun?"

"Yes, Ayanami?"

I opened my mouth and tried to explain but no words came. I shook my head in frustration. There was no way I could explain something I didn't understand. It was simply impossible. We all sat around drinking tea trying to pass the time.

Ikari-kun put his hand on my shoulder and offered me a comforting smile. "It's okay Ayanami. Not everyone can explain themselves all the time but I'll always be here if you need me."

In the end we were forced to return home to our respective apartments.

I was utterly amazed when I arrived back at my apartment. It was completely different from when I had last seen it. Now there were several colourful objects on the dressing table, new sheets, curtains and other such items.

It took me several minutes to take it all in and adjust myself to my apartments' now look. Reika had been quite busy redecorating since she started living here. It then took me even more time to decide if I even like what Reika had done. I realized after I was able to bring myself back to reality that I did like the changes. It made my apartment look more hospitable and less like a jail cell. It made it a, home . . .

I slipped off my shoes and ventured into my apartment. I felt a strange sense of anticipation to see what she had done mix with my worry as to how she was doing.

I found even more new things in my bathroom; new towels, shampoo and make-up. She had bought make-up. Suddenly I hoped Reika would be joining me once she was better. I had no idea what to do with most of these things. It was foreign to me.

I shook my head and made my way back to my main room. It was late and if nothing else I should get a good night sleep while I could. I had the feeling that I would need it.

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In the morning I got of bed early and returned to NERV as the Commander had ordered me yesterday.

I met Pilot Sohryu in the locker room when I arrived. She looked to be in a better mood when I had last seen her yesterday. This meant that she was smiling and very talkative. Pilot Sohryu almost always spoke to me while we were alone in the locker room although it was rare that I would respond to her.

"Guten morgen, Wondergirl."

"Good morning, Pilot Sohryu."

Pilot Sohryu turned to look at me, mild shock evident on her face. "Mien Gott! You're speaking to me this morning."

I looked back at her and tried a small smile. The expression on Pilot Sohryu's face became even more horrified. I was unaware that my smiling was such a shocking event. I made a mental note to remember that fact.

"Are you okay? You're acting strange."

I nodded. "I feel fine."

Pilot Sohryu sighed and shook her head.

"Arigato, Pilot Sohryu."

Pilot Sohryu froze and very slowly raised her head to look at me. Her eyes were hard like she was trying to hold something back behind them. "What did you say?"

"Arigato, Pilot Sohryu."

Shock was evident across Pilot Sohryu's face. "Why?"

"You saved me and I am grateful for that."

Pilot Sohryu sighed once more and shook her head. "You are so weird, Wondergirl."

We turned our back and began the process of changing into our plug suits. It was routine by now for both of us and it did easily. "Did you know Hikari stayed with that baka all night?"

"Horaki-san stayed with Suzuhara?"

Pilot Sohryu nodded. "Yep. Is that insane or what?"

I had to think about that one for a moment before I was able to answer her. "It simply means she cares deeply."

Pilot Sohryu shook her head like she thought I was insane. Who knows, maybe I was?

The test went as expected, synchronization with Unit Zero went easily and my numbers were the same as before I was possessed by the angel.

After the test I saw Dr. Akagi hand Ikari-kun a note. He looked unsure for a moment but then took it. He tucked it in his hand and hurried out of sight.

Once I was finished changing I went to see Reika but I found her room completely empty. The feeling of apprehension I had been feeling since last night only increased when I saw her empty bed. Something was not right. I should go see Dr. Akagi.

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Ritsuko gazed around the empty room as she absentmindedly rested her hand on Unit One. 'What am I going to do?' She wondered.

There was only a little more then 24 hours before she had been ordered to terminate Reika. She knew that this time things would go perfectly. Reika wasn't even conscious and would not be able to resist. The others would believe she had left or been dismissed by Commander Ikari. No one would know she was dead until it was too late, if ever. 'Ritsuko It's been a while.' Said a cheery female voice.

Ritsuko straightened up, certain that she was imagining things. Yui Ikari couldn't have spoken to her though the Eva, right? Ritsuko had finally begun to relax, once again pondering what it meant to kill Reika, when she heard the voice again. 'Why are you so quiet, Ritsuko? Is it that you are distracted?'

'Yui?'

'Yes, that is my name. Now, let me ask you something, do you want to save Reika or not?'

'Yes.' Ritsuko replied after a long pause.

'Then use your mother's backdoor to loop the cameras so Gendo can't spy on you.'

'What? A backdoor?'

'You don't know about it? I was sure your mother would show you.'

'We didn't talk much before she died because we were both quite busy.'

'Take a closer look at the E5 terminal.'

'The E5 terminal?'

'Whatever else she was your mother was she was undoubtedly a genius.'

---

Ritsuko waited until the day crew had left before she allowed herself to think about what Unit One had told her. She didn't trust herself to do anything else. She feared that she might go crazy and do something stupid. There was also the risk that Gendo would spy on her and find out what she was doing.

Once she was sure everyone had gone home for the day Ritsuko finally allowed herself to relax. Gendo wouldn't be here until morning. He was trusting Ritsuko to take care of Reika. So there was no one to watch her.

Ritsuko began by accessing the data run from Reika's dummy pug. She hadn't noticed it until after the battle today, but there was a slight anomaly in it. Ritsuko wanted to see if this was related to the backdoor in the E5 terminal Yui had mentioned.

A file full of data opened on her laptop's screen. Ritsuko scrolled thought it unusually slowly being careful to make sure that she understood everything. When she reached the point where the anomaly had occurred Ritsuko stopped scrolling altogether and read intently.

Yes, it was the E5 terminal. Ritsuko sat back laughing in relief. It was so clear. She didn't know why she hadn't seen it before. It was well, amusing . . .

Ritsuko lifted her coffee mug from her desk and took a deep drink to steady herself. Now was not the time to go insane. She needed to remain calm and in control if she was going to be able to do anything. She'd be nothing but crazy if she did anything else.

Now was the hard question. Who did she hate more Gendo or Reika?

Ritsuko wasn't sure. Reika was no different then Rei. She was a fake and a clone made to look like Yui. That made her an abomination. On the other hand Reika was more human then the other Ayanami clones and willing to rebel. Reika was strong of spirit and completely different from Rei.

Reika was Gendo's enemy. By allowing her to live Ritsuko would be defying the supreme commander of NERV. Doing this would be the ultimate act of betrayal. Did she hate Gendo enough to go this far?

Ritsuko's hands tightened around her coffee mug.

'Mother? What should I do?'

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Author's Notes:

Once again Sesshy is here with yet another instalment. I hope you all enjoyed this previous chapter. I know that you all must be dying to know, would I be crazy enough to kill my own OC? Maybe.

Please Review, they are highly appriciated. I want more then three this time guys, please. C'mon. I know you have it in you. It's so easy, press the little purple button down there.

I don't own Eva!!! Nuf said.

Finally the teaser:

Shinji took the note Ritsuko had given him and stuffed it deep in his pocket. This was all too weird. He knew it wasn't meant for him but he had the feeling he knew what it said. There just might be hope, if they all were lucky.