Chapter 8: Team Amazon in the Amazon

Team Chris was relaxing in first class on their way to the next challenge. Owen was taking a nap, when suddenly he had a nightmare. He flipped out and flailed his arms, hitting Alejandro and knocking him over. Owen screamed and woke up. "Whoa, what a terrible dream!" He looked down and saw Alejandro on the floor, rubbing his blackened eye. "Al, what happened?" "Nothing a little ice and revenge won't fix", he replied. Owen smiled. "Cool. Wait, did you say revenge?" "Of course not. Off topic, do you have any serious allergies?"

Confession Cam: Owen

"Sometimes I get the feeling that Al might slightly not totally like me. Punching him in the face probably didn't help. Unless he likes that kind of thing. Fingers crossed!"

Chef came to first class and gave Alejandro an eye patch. Alejandro smiled at Sierra. "How do I look?", he asked. She shrugged. "Kinda like a pirate. Personally I prefer ninjas..." Alejandro sighed. Owen walked up to Al and put a hand on his shoulder. "Guys, let's be a team! A team that accepts each other and gets along regardless of any accidents they might have had! Yeah!" Owen cheered and knocked Alejandro over again.

Meanwhile, the other teams were talking in the economy class. "You know what's funny?", Lindsay asked. "You guys are Team Amazon, but we're the all girl team!" Heather rolled her eyes. "Yeah, hilarious." Bridgette frowned. "Heather, can you lighten up?" "Not really. I have a million dollars to win, and I need to keep an eye on you and Alejandro." Bridgette blushed. "You're still mad about that?" Heather glared at her, and Bridgette turned away. Chris turned on the intercom. "Brace for landing! We've arrived at our next destination: the Amazon!", he announced. "But, the runway's a liiiiittle short." The teams buckled up. "Team Amazon in the Amazon? That's gotta be a lucky sign", Gwen said. Courtney glared at her. "Don't jinx us, please." Gwen just rolled her eyes.

The plane landed, roughly, and crashed into a tree. Everyone got out and walked to Chris. "Welcome to Peru, birth place of the mighty Amazon river. This challenge is called the Am-AAAGH!-zon race. Teams must hike along an ancient Inca trail through the Peruvian jungle, all the way to Machu Picchu. Hidden somewhere among the ruins of the city, a golden treasure awaits discovery. Find the treasure to win first class passage to our next destination. Last team to arrive at Machu Picchu will have to send someone out the elimination door. And be warned, the jungle contains many vicious insects." Cody raised his hand. "Yes, Cody, the legal department made me well aware of your allergies and insisted we supply an Epi pen. One of your teammates should hang onto this. Who's it gonna be?" Cody turned to Gwen. "I'll take it", she said. Sierra screamed and ran up to Gwen, grabbing her by her shoulders. "You'd better make sure you keep Cody safe, okay? His allergies are life threatening!" Lindsay walked over to Sierra and pushed her away. "Back off, Cody's MY boyfriend! Gwen, you'll take care of him for me, right?" Gwen groaned and nodded.

Chris pulled out a photo of a man wearing a mask. "Also in the jungle are the Zing Zings, a tribe of natives who have barely encountered modern man and are very protective of their territory. They look kinda like this. If you see one, do not make contact." Owen raised his hand. "How far away is Mucky Pikachu?", he asked. "Machu Picchu is a hop, skip and a jump from here... plus eighteen hours." The contestants groaned. "The jungle is too dangerous to travel at night, so teams will have to stop at dusk and camp along the trail until sunrise." "And I assume there are no tents?", Alejandro asked. "Correctamundo. Now, because the playing area is so vast and dangerous, each team will have a walkie-talkie in case of emergency." Chris pulled out a box of the devices and tossed one to each team. "I wish you all good luck, or at the very least, a lack of death."

The teams started walking and came to a crossroad. Lindsay looked at the two paths and scratched her head. "Eenie meanie minie... left?" Bridgette shrugged, and the girls took the left path. Tyler watched them walk away, then turned to his team. "Left, right? Definitely left." He ran down the path and Team Chris followed. Last up was Team Amazon. "Maybe we should go right", Gwen said. Courtney shook her head. "I don't think so. Even if left is the wrong way, there's safety in numbers. We should stick with the group." Izzy put a hand on Courtney's shoulder. "Oh, stop with the CIT training stuff. Let's take the road less traveled! Follow me, everybody!" Izzy ran down the right path and the rest of her team did the same.

Team Victory found Chris waiting at the top of a wooden platform in the forest, near the river. He waved at them. "Welcome, tiny Victory! I'd say Team, but you're more of a duo. But hey, first is first. So, you get to cross this water hazard using the T bar. Everyone else will have to take the line hand over hand. The girls cheered, then grabbed onto the T bar and slid down the line.

On the other path, Team Amazon was walking along and swatting mosquitoes. "Hey Gwen? You know how to use an Epi Pen, right?", Cody asked. "Not a clue, she said." Izzy smiled. "Oh, I know! You just shove the needle into the poor sucker's butt!" Gwen covered her mouth, pulled the pen out of her pocket and gave it to Cody. "Good luck with that..." Then, a giant mosquito flew down and tried to carry Cody away. Izzy roared, picked up a stick and threw it at the mosquito. The bug was impaled and fell to the ground. Izzy laughed. "Haha, this is even better than that trip to Australia!"

Later, Team Chris got to Chris on his platform by the line. "Where's the hanging on thingy part?", Tyler asked. "Hanging on thingy?" "You know, the riding stick! Grabby whatchamacallit... Zipper buckle handle!" "Getting colder..." "Alejandro stepped forward. "We need no T bar! We are Team Chris is Really Really Really Really Hot!" He pulled off his belt, put it over the line and used it to slide across. Owen cheered. "Great idea, Al!" He grabbed onto the line and slid down, but got rope burn and screamed in agony. Then, he weighed the line down too far and fell into the river. He came back out with fish biting him all over. Chris smirked. "Oh yeah, there may or may not be piranhas in this water", he said. Owen crawled across the line to the other side of the river. Then, Sierra used her belt to cross the river, Noah used a book, and Tyler used his pants. The pants caught on fire and Tyler fell in the water. He swam to shore, screaming while the piranhas bit him.

A while later, Team Amazon heard some rustling in the bushes near the path. They crept toward the sound and saw a pair of Zing Zings sitting by a fire. Izzy gasped. "Oh my gosh, natives!" Cody shushed her. "Izzy, be quiet, we can't make contact!" While he was talking, the Zing Zings walked up behind Cody and the others, pointing some spears at them. The teens turned, saw this and gasped. "Well well, lucky us", Heather said to Gwen. Gwen pulled out the walkie-talkie. "Chris? We need help. Chris? Chris!" She checked the device and went wide-eyed. "No batteries." The Zing Zings herded Team Amazon to a tree and tied them up, then went back to their fire. "The batteries in my flashlight should fit into the walkie-talkie, but I can't reach my back right pocket", Cody said. "Gwen, you got us into this mess. You try getting us out", Heather told her. Gwen nodded. She reached into Cody's pocket and pulled out some items. "Killer Casanova kissing mints? Hair gel? Saw body spray? X-ray glasses?" "What color are Cody's undies?", Heather asked. "Um, Gwen-" Gwen put the glasses on, looked at Cody, and screamed. She threw the glasses away. "I thought it'd be better to not wear any, in case I needed the Epi pen", Cody said.

Confession Cam: Gwen

"How the hell would he have known we'd be here! Why did he just assume he might need his Epi pen! What the hell, Cody!"

Gwen groaned and put her hand back in Cody's pocket. "Okay, where's that flashlight... I think I got it!" She jabbed her hand on something. "Oww!" She pulled it out and the Epi pen was sticking out of it. "You'll be okay, I swear! It's just like a big shot of adrenaline!", Cody said. "How big?" Courtney stuck her hand in Cody's other pocket and pulled out the flashlight. She handed it to Gwen. "Get the batteries in the walkie-talkie already!"

Meanwhile, the sun was setting. Alejandro and his team arrived at a hill, and he scanned the horizon. "Well, it's almost dusk. We can make camp here." Owen crawled up behind the others, panting. "Need rest... and water... ohh, nachos would be killer right now." Noah rolled his eyes. "Sure, all we're missing is chips, beef, tomatoes, lettuce, cheese, salsa, and various other ingredients." Up ahead on the path, Team Victory ran into Chris. "Hey, Chris! Do you have food?", Bridgette asked. Chris nodded. "Lucky you, you're still in first place and you get a reward." Chris pulled out a machete, cut a nearby rope, and a crate of bananas fell from a tree. "All the bananas you can eat." Bridgette cheered and started eating.

Gwen got the flashlight batteries into the walkie-talkie and frantically started talking. "Chris Chris Chris this is Gwen! The Zingies, caught by the tree tied up, my hands in Cody's pants, this trouble is big!" Chris picked up his walkie-talkie. "Wait, what the heck?" Lindsay took the device from Chris. "Darn right this trouble is big. Gwen, keep your hands off my boyfriend!" "Come on Chris, help us!" "Gwen Epi penned herself, we need help!", Courtney said. Chris took his walkie-talkie back. "Emergencies only!", he said. Heather took her team's walkie-talkie from Gwen. "We're being held at spear point by the Zing Zings! Help us now!" "Cody, we're in first place!", Lindsay said. "Yeah, cool", Cody said. Chris pushed Lindsay away and said "Okay, Team Amazon, remain calm. I'll get help for you as soon as I can triangulate your position."

Gwen started spazzing out. "Okayidon''MGONNALOSEIT!" "You already lost it!", Heather told her. "Idon'!" The Zing Zings walked up to Gwen and growled at her. Then, they approached Heather. They mumbled something, then ran over to a bush. They muttered something else and moved the bush away, revealing a carving that looked like Heather on a nearby tree. "I think they think you're a goddess of some kind", Cody said. Heather smiled. "I think I'm starting to like this place."

Around midnight, some tiny monkeys approached Team Victory. Bridgette smiled at them. "Hey, little guys! You want some bananas?" She tossed some fruit to them and they chattered happily. Lindsay smiled. "Aww, they're so cute! This is the best challenge ever!" Meanwhile, Owen heard some rumbling in the forest. He turned to his team and asked "Is that coming from the fire?" "Fires rarely growl", Noah said. "Al built it. Maybe Spanish fires growl", Owen said. The rumbling got closer and the others woke up. "What is that?", Alejandro asked. Owen threw some sticks into the fire. The increased lighting revealed some giant centipedes, which attacked them.

The Zing Zings pulled Heather out of the ropes, keeping the rest of Team Amazon tied up, and took her to a chair they had built. "Hey, let go of me! I said let go!" One of them put a crown of leaves on her head. Then, they both backed away and bowed. Gwen giggled. "Wow is this crazy or what? I mean she looks just like that carving, it can't be just me who thinks this is crazy, it's crazy crazy crazy!"

Confession Cam: Heather

"Even as a child, I knew that someday a large group of people would worship me. I knew."

The next morning, Team Victory ate a few bananas and started walking. "Onward, to more victory!", Bridgette said. Meanwhile, Team Chris awoke as well. Alejandro got a stick and turned to his teammates. "Daybreak, let's get moving! No time for head counts! Let's get to Machu Pichu and find that treasure!"

Team Victory arrived at Machu Picchu first. Chris walked up to them, yawning and smiling. "Morning, girls! Somehow, you're still in first place! Find the treasure before anyone else, and you'll leave Peru in first class." "Yes, yes, yes! Let's go, Bridgette!", Lindsay said. Bridgette cheered. "Yeah! Let's make sure the person going home isn't on our team!" A short while later, Team Chris arrived. Chris stopped them at some stairs. "Uh-uh, you can't start searching until your whole team is here!" "You never said that! You're making up the rules as we go!", Alejandro said. "And this surprises you because...?" Alejandro sighed. "Fine. Allow me to search for Owen."

Meanwhile, Gwen was sleeping and snoring while the rest of her tied up teammates were wide awake. "When the epinephrine wears off, it knocks you out good", Cody said. Izzy groaned. "Her snoring is driving me crazy!" "I think you mean crazier", Courtney said. "Heather, make them untie us!" Heather shook her head. "What if I ask and it makes them angry? Angry enough to sacrifice one of you? You don't want that!" "She's got a point", Cody said.

Alejandro found Owen tied up in a tree. He pulled him down and tore some caterpillar string off him. "Owen, what happened?", he asked. "What do you mean, what happened? You watched the caterpillars drag me away!" "I don't know what you're talking about. "The others were asleep, but you, you had your eye open! I saw you!" "Obviously you're wrong. The others went ahead without you. I refused to move on without you." "Whether that's true or not, you STILL let the caterpillars take me." Alejandro groaned. "Just come on, okay? We have a challenge to win." Owen sighed. "Fine..." They ran back to Machu Picchu where the others were waiting. Owen fell down, but Alejandro kept standing. "Okay, let's find that treasure!", he said. He and the rest of Team Chris ran off to do so. Then, Lindsay and Bridgette ran up to Chris. "I found it!", Lindsay shouted. "Wow, good timing! Victory for Team Victory!" Team Victory cheered, and Chris checked his watch. "Okay, let's get out of here and tell Team Amazon they lost."

A while later, Team Amazon heard some rustling in the forest. Chef walked up to the tree that everyone but Heather was tied to. Izzy gasped. "Hey, Chef!" One of the Zing Zings ran up to him, pointing his spear. "No, guys, it's okay!", Heather said. "Chef, if you wanna get on their good side, you should bow before me. I'm a bit of a goddess to the Zing Zings." "Those aren't Zing Zings! They look like local Peruvian teenagers!", he said. "Then what's with the outfits and the spears?" One of them went up to Heather, took his mask off and showed her a piece of paper. "You're actors in this year's Shakespeare in the Jungle production of Macbeth? We were held captive by bit actors!" "Guess you aren't a goddess after all", Courtney said. "And you lost the challenge. Y'all gotta vote someone off", Chef told them. "Oww! I just got bit by a red ant!", Cody yelled. Izzy smiled. "Ooh, let me try to suck the poison out!" Izzy started sucking Cody's bitten thumb. "If only we had someone we can blame for all this... morning, Gwen!", Heather said. Gwen yawned and got up. "Did we win?", she asked. Her teammates glared at her.

Everyone went to the plane, and Team Victory went to first class. The girls sat down on a couch and looked out the window. Lindsay turned to Bridgette and asked "Do you think we can bring Cody and Heather to join us?" Bridgette sighed. "As long as they don't get eliminated..."

Team Amazon was waiting for Chris in the elimination room. Alejandro walked in and came over to Heather. "Oh, look. It's pirate Pablo", she said. "Ah, Heather, cheer up! Your departure will make the game a whole lot easier for me!", he said. Heather glared at him. "I am NOT leaving tonight, and YOU are not gonna win. You're going down, you girlfriend kissing jerk." Alejandro smirked. "We'll see about that." Chris came in, pushing a cart with a TV on it. "Alright, Amazons! Ready to find out who you chose to eliminate? Let's look at the footage, just for fun." He hit a button on the TV and a video from the confession cam started.

Confession Cam: Gwen

"I vote for Heather. And Chris, there's ten dollars in it if you 'forget' to give her a parachute.

Confession Cam: Courtney

"See you later, Gwen! Hope you don't take the wrong path on your way home!"

Confession Cam: Heather

"I vote Gwen."

Confession Cam: Izzy

"I dunno who to vote for... Gwen got us lost, but it was so fun! So, uh, I vote for... Heather."

Confession Cam: Cody

"I hate to say it, but I vote for Gwen. Mostly because of the Epi pen mishap and my getting a bug bite, but also because of the x ray glasses. Very embarrassing..."

Chris smiled and turned the TV off. "There. All done." Gwen sighed. "Well... I guess I deserve this. Let's get it over with", she said. "Yeah, this would be a good time to watch someone fall out of the plane... you know, if this were actually an elimination round! But it's not!" Chris pulled out a party favor horn and blew it. "Surprise!" Gwen and Heather cheered. Cody and Courtney gasped.

Confession Cam: Gwen

"Wow. Maybe this really WAS lucky for me. I'm still here! This could still be my season!"

Bridgette and Lindsay walked into the elimination room. Bridgette walked up to Chris. "Is it over? Who got kicked off?", she asked. Chris shook his head. "No one did. It was a fake out!" Lindsay applauded. "Yay!" "Yep. I just showed everyone who got the votes to stir up drama." Bridgette turned to Heather and Cody. "Glad you're still here, guys. Let's go to first class." Heather and Cody followed the girls there. Cody and Lindsay sat down on a couch and made out, while Bridgette and Heather talked. "I'm glad you're still here, Heather", Bridgette said. Heather smiled. "So am I. And I'm glad you aren't gone yet. Let's take down Alejandro together, okay?" Bridgette smiled. "Deal. No guy is gonna come between us, no matter how hot." Heather sighed. "You still think he's hot?" "Well, he is. But you are too." Heather blushed, and Bridgette leaned in and kissed her. "Come on, you guys lost and STILL haven't had an elimination. Cheer up." Heather nodded. "Oh, fine." The girls hugged and looked out the window on their way to the next challenge.