Chapter Fifteen

"If I die young, bury me in satin

Lay me down on a bed of roses

Sink me in the river at dawn

Send me away with the words of a love song

The sharp knife of a short life, well

I've had just enough time

And I'll be wearing white, when I come into your kingdom

I'm as green as the ring on my little cold finger,

I've never known the lovin' of a man

But it sure felt nice when he was holdin' my hand,

There's a boy here in town, says he'll love me forever,

Who would have thought forever could be severed by

The sharp knife of a short life, well,

I've had just enough time"

- The Band Perry

Austin was transferred to St. Mungo's after three days with no response. Remus slept fitfully of her as he lay at Hogwarts, desperately wanting to go and see her, but being restricted by exams getting nearer. Remus' latest dream had been of them both sitting in the Shrieking Shack, she was telling him that it was alright to let her go. Remus shook his head as he shrugged into his robes and hurried down the steps to the common room.

"Dumbledore has postponed Seventh Year N.E.W.T.'s, Remus." Lily whispered later that day as they sat in the library together, "He wants to give friends of Austin time to go and visit her. We won't have the last week of school like normal, though."

"Did he say this at breakfast?" Remus questioned as he began to shove his things in his bag.

"Yes, you didn't come down in time." Lily commented as she placed her hand on his to still him, "McGonagall wants to see you. She came to me while I was eating."

Remus felt dread come over him, but he nodded and got up. He needed to leave right away. He had to see Austin, make sure she was okay.

McGonagall was in her office when Remus approached. She actually gave him a soft smile as she motioned to a chair in front of her desk, "Mr. Lupin, I wanted to speak with you about going to see Miss Cross."

McGonagall's voice slightly cracked over the American's name but she didn't allow that to affect her calm. Remus felt dread settle in his stomach and closed his eyes. "Yes, Professor?"

"The healers are saying that she is in a coma. They ran tests to see what happened during the full moon, hoping that it maybe something easy to fix. However, it turns out that the werewolf gene is trying to force her body to transform without the help of the full moon. The healers say the only way they can help her is by finding a cure for lycanthropy, and as no such thing exists, they have given her three days left with us." By the end of her explanation, McGonagall's cheeks were slick with tears, "Professor Dumbledore has given everyone permission to visit her and to say good bye. He wants you and your friends to go first along with Severus Snape. You six were the closest to Austin and he believes that you should be allowed to say your good byes first and speak with a healer there about any concerns."

Remus felt himself stiffen in the middle of McGonagall's speech. No. Austin couldn't be dying. She was so full of life during that last day. She was so happy and vibrant. They'd found a broom cupboard and had one last heated snog before going up to the hospital wing. She was perfectly fine. She had to be.

"Mr. Lupin?" McGonagall questioned and he felt her hand on his arm.

"I think I'm going to be sick." Remus gasped before bolting from the room.

Two hours later, Remus was sitting beside Austin's bed. The healers had been feeding her pain potions since she was twitching and gasping, but not waking up. They wanted her last few days to be spent in peace. Remus felt his eyes prickle with tears as he looked at the blond haired angel laying on her bed.

Lily and Peter hadn't been able to handle it and James had taken them up to the tea room. Sirius was sitting on the other side of the bed, his eyes rimmed in red. "She looks so small," Sirius croaked.

"She's always been small," Severus murmured from the foot of the bed.

Sirius snarled at the dark haired man but even he wouldn't start a fight by the sick bed of a friend. "Snape's right. Austin has always looked small, but not fragile. She looks so bloody fragile now." Remus' voice cracked and he fought his tears.

The three boys were all fighting tears, not wanting to bury their friend and girlfriend, respectively. As one, the boys placed their hands on the girl, Remus and Sirius taking her hands while Severus gripped her ankle. As one, the boys stiffened as they were brought into a vision by some form of ancient magic.

Austin was eleven and sitting on the Hogwarts Express. She had tears in her eyes as she watched her family fade away on the platform. This was the first time she'd be away from them for so long. She was scared. That was when the door opened and a young Lily and Severus entered the train compartment. The two friends froze upon seeing someone else, but Austin gave a small smile.

"It's a'right. I don't bite or nothin." Austin smiled, her American accent even stronger at this age then when she was older.

Lily gave a bright smile as she pulled Severus inside. "I'm Lily Evans and this is my friend, Severus Snape."

"I'm Austin Cross." Austin smiled as she shook each of their hands, "It's nice to meet ya. Are you first years, too?"

The scene shifted to the sorting. It was Austin's turn and she was walking carefully up to the stool. She was fearful that she wouldn't be placed at all, that there was some mistake and she was forced to return home in disgrace. She sat carefully, allowing her legs to swing much to McGonagall's chagrin. The older students all chuckled at her antics. The hat went over her head and covered her entire face completely.

"Ah! An American witch! We haven't had one of you in a while!" The hat chuckled in her ear.

You've had another American before? Austin thought brightly.

"Oh, yes. He was very polite, but he went back to America to marry. He always said hello to me when he came to the headmasters' office. Now, down to business, young lady. Where should we put you? You have ambition, attentiveness, intelligence in small doses, lots of courage and pride, and love. Your love outweighs everything else. You want to be accepted by the entire school, but you wish to hide behind your human face. You don't want your secrets known, but you fight them and they make you stronger. Hmmm…difficult, difficult." The hat whispered as he thought.

The entire time the students outside the hat's sphere were looking around. Already a lot of time had passed. Has the hat ever not been able to come up with a place to put a student?

"Gryffindor!" The hat finally yelled out to the crowd.

Austin jumped from her stool and rushed to sit down at the table that was cheering the loudest with the red badges on their robes. She sat next to Sirius and held out her hand, "Hi! I'm Austin Cross."

"Sirius Black." The shaggy haired boy responded with a grin before their attention was called back to the sorting. "What took you so long up there?" Sirius whispered after a moment of silence while two other first years were sorted.

"I confused the hat. He didn't know where I should go." Austin chuckled, "My mom always did say I confuse a lot of people.

The scene shifted again to show the common room. Sirius was sitting in a corner with James, Remus, and Peter. Lily and Austin were sitting in the floor just a little ways away from them working on an essay for Charms.

"Lily, do like Sev?" Austin whispered after a few moments.

"What do you mean?" Lily asked as she put down her quill and wiggled her fingers around to get more feeling in them.

"I mean, do you like him? Are you wanting to date him when you get older?" Austin had a faint blush on her cheeks and looked down.

"I never thought about him that way. He's always just been a friend. Why?"

"I don't know. You two just look so close all the time that I just figured you'd decide to get together one day."

Their conversation was interrupted when a wad of parchment hit Austin in the head. "Cross! Get over here!" Sirius called to her rather loudly seeing as they weren't that far away from each other.

Austin shook her head with wide, innocent eyes at the grinning boy. "Nope! I'd like to keep my record clean for a little while longer, thanks."

"We're not doing anything bad!" Sirius sighed in exasperation. Everyone had forgotten how much of a drama queen he was when he was younger. "Remus here needs help with potions."

Austin shook her head again, but she stood up to walk over to the boys. She looked around at each of them before she looked at Sirius, "Which one's Remus?"

"He's talking about me, and I don't really need help." The brown haired boy blushed before getting closer to his roll of parchment.

"Wouldn't hurt for you to look at it without crossin your eyes, though." Austin grinned before pulling up another chair to the table. "If it helps any, my daddy's the one who taught me all about potions."

Remus looked up with a look of fear in his eyes. It wasn't about her father working on potions, it was how close she was to him. Even at the age of eleven he knew there was something interesting about this girl, something no one else knew.

Remus passed his potions essay across to her and she immediately began to read over it. She pointed to a few problems, but there were only a handful. "This is better than mine!" Austin laughed as she past the parchment back. "Oh! I'm Austin Cross by the way." She held out her hand.

"Remus Lupin." The brown haired boy said quietly as he shook her hand. "You're American?"

"Yep! Born and raised. I was kinda shocked when I got invited to come to Hogwarts, but the schools in America aren't that good. Besides, I think I'm going to like it here better." Austin explained with a bright smile as she looked at Remus.

He looked sick, but she decided that he may just be coming down with a cold. She didn't think too much about it.

The scene shifted again to their first Hogsmede weekend. Lily had been asked to go with the Ravenclaw Keeper and Severus was staying back to practice his potion making. That left Austin to go with the Gryffindor boys. They were in the Three Broomsticks. Remus was looking better after two weeks of looking very ill and having to go home to take care of his sick mother.

"Austin, what are you on about?" James laughed as he tossed a chocolate frog card at her face.

"I'm just thinkin. We're third years now and all we get ta do is go to a village? I'd rather be sneaking into Slughorn's office for the mead I hear he's got in there." Austin winked at the messy haired boy in front of her.

"We don't need to get drunk, now. We have to be on our best behavior." Sirius said in the most innocent voice any of the group had ever heard.

"That's only because you want to get a snog out of that Hufflepuff girl you've been after all week." Peter piped up from next to Remus.

Austin gasped mockingly at the handsome boy next to her and shook her head, "A Hufflepuff!"

"Hush up!" Sirius' face flushed as he flicked a piece of sugar quill at Peter.

"I'm bored." Austin stated immediately.

James, Sirius, and Peter looked down at their filled butterbeers. Remus, on the other hand, laughed and stood up. "Come on, we can go check out the owls at the post office."

Austin bounded out of her chair with a wave at their friends, "At least Rem knows how to treat a girl."

"You're a girl?" All three boys remaining at the table asked.

Remus laughed as he pulled a hysterical Austin from the pub. The two walked and talked, not meeting back up with their friends until they reached Zonko's close to time to leave. Austin smiled up at Remus as she placed her arm in his. He looked down at her with a smile as well, but Austin knew he didn't feel the same thing she did.

Her feelings were beginning to grow for him and she couldn't help but feel elated that he decided to spend most of their time in Hogsmede with her. Maybe he liked her?

The scene shifted again, but it wasn't a memory. It was something else entirely. Remus, Sirius, and Severus were all present this time in the clothes they had worn to visit Austin in the hospital. They looked at each other with shock. They didn't remember this place, this house.

They were standing in a kitchen where there was a large scrubbed table in the middle with cherry wood cabinets lining the walls. The metal sink was empty and the white refrigerator hummed quietly in a corner. The smell of baking bread came from the black and white oven on the opposite wall of the refrigerator.

The boys looked around themselves and noticed the bright yellow paint on the walls and the large window that was directly behind them. The view outside showed a dense forest with a small trail leading into the shadows. The sun was shining from a brilliant blue sky and glittered off the green grass as if it had just finished raining.

"Pretty, isn't it?" a woman's voice asked from behind them.

All three boys turned and their eyes widened. Standing in a doorway to what looked like a living room was Austin. Her blond hair was shining down her back and she wore a simple off-white dress that ended at her knees. Her brown eyes glittered with happiness as she looked at the three of them. She stepped closer and her bare feet slapped against the tile on the floor.

"You guys look like you've seen a ghost." She chuckled in her strange American accent.

"Where are we?" Sirius was the first to come back.

"My home, in America. I thought this would be the best place to end things." Austin frowned as she cocked her head to the side. "You guys look like shit."

Remus felt a chuckle force itself from his throat and tears threaten to spill from his eyes. Austin gave him a small smile before reaching out for him. Remus took her hand in his and felt the warmth that she always possessed. "I don't want you to be cryin over me, Rem. I don't think anyone should be upset. Be upset for a little while, cry when they put me in the ground, but don't let it ruin your life. I've seen the life you could have, Rem, and it's beautiful. Promise me you'll go on?" Austin was whispering to him and he could tell the other two couldn't hear a word they said.

"How can I? Austin, I love you. I can't just let you go now." Remus choked on a sob. "I won't let you go."

"You will, Rem. You have wonderful friends that'll help you. Besides, I won't be hurtin anymore and Greyback won't be comin after me. I'll be with my mom and daddy and my brothers." Austin smiled at him, "Besides, you'll always be my first love, Rem. Even if you never realized how long I've loved you."

Austin moved away from him and towards Severus. Remus couldn't hear what she said, but Severus could hear it. "Don't do anything stupid when I'm gone, Sev. I know you've been the one to act on angry impulses, but don't let that control you. You are so much better than those idiot Slytherins. You're going to be a real good man one day, helping everyone defeat the evil in the world." Austin was smiling as she pulled Severus to her for a hug, "And for the love of God, Sev, don't forget that your love for Lily is what makes all the darkness go away."

Severus gave a watery laugh before nodding his head, "I'll try, but I'll tell you now that's it's going to be hard. You were the only real friend I've ever had, Austin. Lily left and wouldn't even let me apologize, but you never gave up on me. Merlin knows you were the only one that understood me."

Austin smiled softly and moved on once more. This time she stopped in front of Sirius. He was already crying and screwing his eyes shut, "I don't want you to tell me not to get drunk. I don't want you to tell me not to cry or get mad. I don't want you to leave us." Sirius was sputtering through his tears.

Austin reached up and took his face in her hands, "Sirius, I want you to stop this at once. I need you to listen to what I have to say, it'll be important one day."

Sirius nodded and opened his eyes, but his tears continued to fall down his face, "What?"

"No matter what happens in the future, don't lose your hope and your good heart. You proved to everyone that stereotypes aren't always right. Show everyone what you can do and do not get discouraged when things don't go your way or your blamed for something you didn't do. And remember, when people you love die, you don't have to be alone." Austin smiled and took her hands away from his face. She placed her right hand above his heart and grinned up at him, "The ones that you love, never leave. We're always going to be in here."

Austin moved back to the doorway, "I've got to go now, guys. Remember what I've said and I'll see you when you come across. Love you!"

Remus moved to stop her, but she was gone. A pressure was forcing Remus away and a quick glance at everyone else told him that the other two felt it to. The house melted away and darkness before a light.

The three boys were pushed from the vision and came back to the room at St. Mungo's. They gasped for breath and looked at each other with shock written all over their features.

"What in the name of Merlin was that?" Sirius gasped.

Remus was watching Austin and Severus was gripping the bars at the foot of the bed. "That was her giving memories to us." Severus whispered before falling to his knees at the end of the bed, "She's saying goodbye."

Remus stood quickly, the chair skittering across the floor before toppling over. "No! She can't die! Not yet!" Remus exclaimed as he reached over and gripped her face in his hands. She was going cold, colder than normal. Remus looked at her and fear took his heart. Something was wrong. A soft smile graced her lips, but they were quickly turning blue. "No!"

Thirty minutes later, Remus was sitting with James, Lily, and Peter in the tea room. Sirius was in another room crying his eyes out and Severus had went to the bathroom to do Merlin knows what. The three boys who had been with Austin when she left them never spoke about the vision. It was going to be a secret they took to their graves.

Dumbledore canceled N.E.W.T.'s at the school and informed the Seventh Years that the Ministry would allow them to go there and take them in July. It was the best that could be done given the situation. The Seventh Years were all trying to be calm and collected, but sobs broke out randomly in the halls, library, dining hall, and common rooms. Madam Pomfrey saw many students for talks throughout the rest of the school year. Even Remus went to her to talk about what had happened.

When it was time for the funeral, Remus met his friends down on the lawn. A portkey would be taking them to a wizarding cemetary in America where Austin's entire family had been laid to rest. Lily was sobbing, her eyes the same color as her hair. James didn't look any better. Peter was trying not show how upset he was. Sirius glanced at Remus and clapped him on the shoulder.

"Snape's coming with us." Sirius said quietly.

Remus only nodded and the two hung back as the rest of the group went ahead. They would wait for Snape to get there, to make sure that their secret was still safe.

The funeral had actually been very good. Mr. Burnings spoke instead of a minister. Most of Hogwarts staff was there. Beatrice clung to a Frenchwoman's side as she cried. Remus could hardly feel anything, he knew he couldn't hear anything until the end of the service.

"Austin always said that she would die young and that she'd have a decent turn out for her funeral. She would smile and say that she didn't want anyone to cry, but maybe a little." Mr. Burnings smiled through his tears as he looked down at the white coffin that was standing open for everyone to see. Austin lay there, the sweet smile still on her lips. She was wearing the same dress that Remus, Sirius, and Severus had seen her wearing during the vision. Her hair was splayed around her like a halo as she held onto a white Lily, a red rose, a black carnation, and a yellow daisy. "I can't say that we've really respected her wishes. All of us knew who Austin was and she brought a smile to everyone's faces even when she was hurting the most inside. She was an orphan and was marked for death when she was first born. But, that didn't stop her from living her life. She was only happy when her friends were happy and attempted to do everything she could to do make them so. Austin Cross will be remembered by all of us until the day we die and are reunited with her because she was a loyal friend to everyone, a vivacious young lady who would expect nothing else from us but the best, and she was always pushing us to exceed what was believed to be our best. Austin Cross will be missed, but tonight as we mourn her together we will each remember something she said and think back on it. We will remember those words for the rest of our lives because there was something true in them, something completely Austin about them, something that brings us comfort and sadness, happiness and pain, those words will be our way of making sure Austin lives on in our world."

Remus felt his heart lurch and he leaned forward in his chair. He couldn't see the girl he was in love with being lowered into the ground between her two older brothers. He couldn't handle seeing her pale face surrounded in death. She was the one who made him feel human, the one who made him feel as if it was okay to be a werewolf. Remus clenched his eyes shut as sobs racked his body.

Remus remembered what Austin said to him in her vision, he'd have a beautiful future. What if he didn't want that bloody future anymore? What if all he wanted was to jump in that hole with her and stay there? Remus felt Sirius pull him to his feet and they stumbled away from the cemetery, following the crowd to a house that was opened for the reception.

The End

Author's Note

This is the end of the story. I wanted to explain why I killed Austin. I did this because I thought it would give more depth to the Remus Lupin that JK Rowling created in the books, explain a little more about why he was so cautious of getting together with Tonks. As I completely understand that being a werewolf was a large part of why Remus was afraid to be with Tonks, I felt that there had to be something else, something a little bigger. This story is that something and I hope that everyone has enjoyed the ride.

I wish to thank everyone who has stayed with the story and the ones that have reviewed. I hope that you guys have a wonderful school year! See you next summer when I (hopefully) have another story for you!

Oh...and I will be putting a poll up on my profile for the category of my next story. Go and vote if you want a say in what the next story will be!

- A. Moonbeam