A slightly longer chapter than usual.
Chapter X
"I think I'm going to be sick."
"If you're going to hurl at least do it out the window and not on me."
"Ha ha."
Daniel Meade took a couple of deep cleansing breaths trying to overcome the panicking feeling inside him. He felt absolutely ridiculous. Who had talked him into this?
A dark head looked outside the window calmly observing the passing trees and houses.
Ah, that's right. A certain Suarez-who-shall-not-be-named had ambushed him early Sunday morning. How the intruder had got to his apartment, Daniel had no idea.
He glared at his impromptu alarm clock now turned guide, "Is this really going to do anything?"
"It'll give you peace of mind. I thought so."
Daniel nodded knowingly. It was true, not too long ago that what had befallen Daniel had also affected his normally loquacious companion. He knew he was not the only one in the world who suffered so. The older man looked sideways at the figure that still stared out the window. It was eerie seeing such a subdued Suarez. They normally were so vivacious, so full of life and joy. Compared to the Meades, the two families were as similar as night and day, but sometimes, when dusk and dawn fell upon the world, they found small things in common - small but life changing qualities, to be sure.
The car slowly pulled up to their destination. Stately trees and marble stonework dotted the landscape, one of the few spots of green, besides Central Park, in New York. Though the car had come to a complete stop, the youngest Meade made no move to step out of the plush black interior.
"Daniel?" a soft voice queried.
"I don't know what to do. What do I even say?"
"Whatever comes from the heart, what you always wanted to say to him."
"You mean how controlling he was and how he wanted me to be the splitting image of him? How much he hurt me, my mother, our entire family?" Daniel's fists tensed, fingernails digging painfully into nervous palms.
A grimace appeared on the Suarez that had been the instigator to this farce. "You should probably leave him and his memory behind you, never to be thought of again. He deserved it." The thought seemed to be more reflected internally than towards anyone else.
Daniel paused at that off-hand suggestion, embracing and dismissing the notion at the same time. His entire being wished to banish his father's memory as his colleague suggested, but in the depths of his soul he never wanted to go to that extreme. Bradford Meade was and always will be his father.
His companion, seemingly reading his mind, continued on, "He was still your father though, and no matter how much you try to deny it, you'll always love him, despite how much of a scumbag he was." A dark head leaned in close to his. "Tell him so that so you can heal."
Dark eyes closed in contemplation. That was the gist of it wasn't it? It was about him, Daniel Meade, not his father. It always was. Love and hatred warred in a troubled heart, unsure to forgive now that the man was out of reach or to hold it against him forever.
The young magazine mogul took another breath, and with the courage he never knew he possessed opened the door.
"Don't forget these." A small hand placed a tasteful arrangement of babies' breath and roses into Daniel's larger ones. He stared momentarily at the dark digits, connected to a figure that looked upon him with such trust and pride.
He wouldn't let anyone with such faith in him down, not ever again.
Within a few quick strides, Daniel made it to his target. Cold, and unyielding stone greeted him, as the man would have in real life.
Bradford Meade
1933- 2007
Beloved Husband and Father
Daniel's bravado faltered as he stared at his father's tombstone. This was his first time visiting after the funeral itself. That day had passed as a blur, accepting false condolences and wishing against everything that he could just go home, crawl under the covers, and never wake up again. Luckily he had Betty to make sure he had a reason to get up in the morning. After overcoming their trust issues and her career crisis, she held down the fort at MODE magazine, gracefully diverting calls from heartless reporters, and offering the Meades privacy as they mourned. Ignacio had of course offered food. They must have known what it was like when Rosa Suarez died. He glanced back at the town car. That Suarez though, that one was the only person who really knew what he was going through.
He cleared his throat nervously finally addressing his unseen audience. "Hey Dad, it's me Daniel. I'm sorry that I haven't been by earlier. The magazine's been doing well and our readership's increased by a couple of percent."
The youngest Meade frowned at his idiotic statements. It sounded like a board meeting than a son speaking to his deceased father. Betty had said once during a soul-baring moment that she had always felt that her Mother's presence was still around her, watching out for her and her family. The Suarezes always gave good advice, and Daniel found his life turning for the better whenever he listened to them. He decided to take the most recent suggestion from his "guide," to speak from the heart.
"I've been terrified with you gone. All my life, it was always Alex that was going to take over the company. I just had to keep out of trouble and not sully the Meade name." He gave a wry chuckle, "You know how well I did that."
His eyes traced the golden lettering of his father's name. "Then all of a sudden Alex's gone and all you have left is me, the spare Meade son. You never wanted me for the job, and I never wanted it in the first place. We were a perfect match." Daniel paused letting his anger and disappointment rise and crest in a wave within him. Breathing out, he let it dissipate and slowly gathered his thoughts for his next revelation.
"You cheated on Mom, you suffocated Alex so much that he had to fake his own death, and you forced me into a life I was never suited for! But I thank whatever deity is up there that you did the one good and smart decision in your life: hiring Betty Suarez as my assistant. She has not only managed to turn my life around, but that of Alexis' and Mom too."
He stared up at a nearby blossoming tree, leaves rustling in the light breeze. "Her and her entire family. They've made such a difference. I don't see how they do it. I see the way they interact, and they just make being happy seem so natural."
His eyes widened with a wistful thought. "I want that in my life."
And there was one person he could see it with.
Who better to weather the storm that was Daniel Meade's life than the girl who helped fix it in the first place? All the other women- models, secretaries, fashion editors, paled in comparison to Betty Suarez. Betty Suarez, with her outrageous braces, loud clothes, and unattractive glasses, but with a heart more beautiful than all of them put together.
He chuckled quietly. When did he get so poetic?
"Just give me a sign Dad. I could have sworn I heard your voice that night back when I was so terrified I sought guidance in your office. Anyone would have thought I was crazy but Betty believed me. She always believes in me. Give me a sign that shows that she and I are even possible."
Daniel waited staring at the block of marble that represented his father's last resting place.
Nothing.
He sighed. He and Betty were an impossibility. What was he thinking? Why would he ever hope that she would choose him? Let her find love and happiness with another. She deserved that at least for dealing with him. It seemed like vapid model airheads were to be his destiny.
The saddened man knelt down to make his floral offering, placing the roses at the base of the tombstone. Bowing his head, he surmised there was nothing out there, in this life or the next.
As he left his bouquet of roses, a soft fluttering of movement brushed against his fingers. Daniel froze, completely immobile in his kneeling position. A single, orange monarch butterfly hovered an inch above his trembling digit. A single heartbeat, an unreleased breath, it landed, walking to the very tip of his finger.
Betty had been dressed as a butterfly for her first Halloween at Mode. Due to Amanda and Marc's subterfuge, she was the only one in costume but her stubbornness, pride, and pure "Bettyness" prevented her from changing outfits then and there. Still, she looked so adorable that day with her bent wire antennas and fake purple wings. She had been trying her best to impress Henry, that nerdy accountant, and despite the day ending in disaster, she maintained a smile throughout. Daniel felt that as much as she metamorphosed into a confident, beautiful woman and writer, she still was Betty, truly one-of-a-kind, all the way.
He glanced at the delicate insect at his finger. Was this the sign Daniel was asking for?
After a few wing beats, the butterfly leapt off for the wide, blue expanse. Daniel watched it hover, until another joined its airborne dance. The pair bumped into each other, hurtling back a few feet before rejoining as a matched duo, off into the unknown horizon.
He let the imagery sink into his mind, calming his downtrodden spirit. Yes, it could have been a coincidence, and that the others at MODE would ridicule him for trusting in such a mundane vision, but he believed it was a message from his father.
Take a chance. Trust in love. I'm proud of you.
Daniel let his fingers run across their shared surname.
"Thanks Dad."
With a spring to his step and a new upbeat outlook, the young Meade traveled the distance back to the town car. He could see his companion patiently waiting, and Daniel was grateful for the sudden and unexpected push to visit the cemetery.
"Did it help?"
Daniel smiled warmly at his friend, "You were right. It really did help. I got a very important question answered." He gave a glance around the marble headstones realizing he wished to repay his guide for everything he'd done. "Do you... do you want to visit your dad?"
"Yeah Daniel. I'd like that. It is Father's Day, after all."
The duo retreated back into the air conditioned car, the two submerging into contemplative silence as they made another journey. Daniel was still reeling from his revelation while his companion geared himself for what was to be his own.
They reached their second destination and this time it was Daniel's turn to wait patiently. He was glad too to be afforded a moment to gather his thoughts. Luckily his guide had not pressed to know what the young editor had said to his father's gravestone, anyone else would have, but this Suarez knew when to question and when to back off.
The tall, lanky figure soon appeared back into Daniel's eyesight, with evidence of tears in dark brown eyes. Affectionately and with a hidden instinct he never knew he possessed, the taller man gathered the other into strong, comforting arms, letting the onset of emotions slowly bleed away. He was surprised to find his own tears falling down his face. There were a few others he could show this side of him, his family not included in this auspicious tier.
"Did it help, Justin?"
The young man gave a watery laugh at the echoed words.
"I just need a minute." Justin Suarez never knew his father, Santos, and just when their reassembled family was looking promising, cruel fate had decided to end the newly made connection.
Daniel allowed the youngest Suarez to gain his composure back. As with the benefits of youth, it took little time. The young man gave a beaming smile Daniel was so used to seeing of him and cheekily said. "Come on. Let's get something to eat. I'm starving."
Now that was more reminiscent of a growing teenage boy.
"I know the perfect place, but let's invite your grandfather."
"Grandpa? Why?"
Daniel gave a small, embarrassed shrug. "It's Father's Day."
Justin Suarez thought for a moment. The man he knew as his grandfather had in fact raised him as a father would, stern but kind, strict and fair. Along with his mom and his aunt, who could be as lucky as him to have such a wonderful family? He gave a sideways glance towards Daniel. His Grandpa too had taken the MODE editor under his wing, giving him the same guidance as he gave Justin, and the young Meade truly felt grateful for it.
"Of course, let's invite Grandpa."
It was only fitting that on this day they included the man who was father to them both.
It's amusing how this was supposed to be a one-shot with hints of a Betty and Daniel pairing. Now it's a full on AU romance, with family has the supporting cast, of course. If anyone wants to correct what's actually on the tombstone, please do. I've never actually watched the episode, or anything past the first season.
Please review,
Grignard