Chapter Seven

A kiss can simply mean nothing at all, or something that means a lot. There is no in between. The actual definition of a kiss is when two lips brush over each over. If only that's all it was. Between family, it could nearly mean a friendly peck on the cheek, or a simple gesture of showing them you love them. Between lovers, a kiss has much more depth. A kiss between lovers, is full of passion and sparks. When you mix the lover's kiss in with friends, things get messy.

Toby sat down next to Holly as quickly as his legs would go. He couldn't believe what he had just done, and he knew he wasn't making it any better by running away. He needed some time to think though. He still could taste the coconut from her luscious lips, and his lips still felt numb from being stuck by lighting. That lightning being Spencer Hastings. Even if the kiss lasted a mere second, it was enough to completely set fireworks off and make him go into a dizzy.

"Where's Spencer?" Holly furrowed her eyebrow noticing the brunette was missing who was clung to Toby's arm the whole night.

"Um," Toby mumbled feeling under pressure. It was lies upon lies tonight. "The bathroom." He said slowly shifting his eyes around the room slowly.

"Oh," She said nodding in understanding. She quickly leaned in closer to Toby, and set her hand on the table. "I'm glad, I've been wanting to talk." She said her voice low and full of desperation.

Toby didn't need Holly thrown into the mess that was already corrupting at the moment. He just needed to some how calm down, and what better way to do that than alcohol. Right? Toby wasn't exactly thinking right that night. "Are you gonna finish that?" he nodded his head at the full glass of white wine in front of Holly. It wouldn't be the first time he shared a drink with her, it's not like they were strangers.

"Uh," she knitted her forehead, sneaking a glance at the wine glass, "No," Her voice trailed. Toby lowered his head and raised his eyebrows, as if he was asking 'do you mind?' and she answered with "Go ahead!" She enthused throwing up her hands gesturing to the wine glass. After Toby gulped down the wine till the last drop, he slammed the glass back on the table. He was going to need a lot more than that to clear his head.

"So," Holly gulped. "I'm sooooooo sorry." She blurted her eyes pleading, and searching Toby's face.

He wasn't focused on Holly at the moment though, he couldn't stop thinking about Spencer. He realized how bad this probably looked. He wished he just would have been more rational, and said he saw Holly looking over at them. Instead of looking like an idiot and running away from her, cowardly. Toby tried to focus on Holly, but his eyes kept escaping away from her, desperately looking around for Spencer. "I know, you have every right to hate me, but I was stupid." She continued. Toby didn't even know what to say. She was apologizing? The one thing he wanted for the last few years, and it's like he didn't even care. "When I found out you were coming tonight,-" She fumbled on her words. "I hoped that we could dance, and laugh, and maybe-" Holly said slowly, her voice full of angst. "Start over?"

"Holly," Toby finally said looking directly in her big vibrant green eyes. "I don't want to start over." He said sternly. "Sure, our friendship kind of-" He rolled the words in his mouth around, trying to find the right word. "Unraveled." He decided. "But, we had some good times too. And I don't want to just pretend those things didn't happen." He said with a soft smile.

"Me neither!" She shrieked with a small giggle of enthusiasm. "Just the last year of it," She scrunched up her nose, as if she just smelt something absurd.

He simply just returned with a nod.

"Toby, I messed up." She said looking down at her folded hands that were now placed her lap. "You were a great guy," She said softly. "It took me a while to realize that, but I did." She shrugged with a small forced smile.

"When you meant start over?" Toby furrowed his eye brows. "You didn't mean as friends...did you?" He said slowly.

"No," She said in a hushed tone finally looking at him once again. "But, it's too late isn't it? You found a lucky girl already."

"Yeah," He said awkwardly after a pregnant pause.

"It was good seeing you Toby." She smiled warmly as she patted his knee, and sat up. "Are you still friends with Wren?" She asked meekly looking down at him.

"Y-yeah." He stuttered.

"Wow," She raised an eyebrow and blinked her eyes. "Well i'm sorry if I caused any complications." She said before saying a final good bye. He watched her drift away into the crowd of people. If? was she in denial, there was no if, she defiantly caused thousands of problems. He knew what he had to do, he didn't want Spencer, to end up like Holly; him running into her at a mutual friends wedding, or at the grocery store. He didn't want the trio's friendship to unravel. He was going to have to lie, and even if it was a horrible, beyond, horrible lie. It was going to have to work.

After roaming around the room for another cup of champagne, wine, any form of alcohol actually, and being stopped by a few of his relatives, he finally spotted Spencer. She was leaning up against the wall, and picking at her nails. She looked out of place, and bored as hell. Toby felt horrible, he left her alone in a room full of people whom she didn't even know. Toby took his place next to her, leaning against the wall, mirroring her slouched posture. She didn't even look up at him, and finally after an awkward minute of silence, she spoke up still starring at her freshly manicured nails.

"Oh I didn't see you there." She said indifferently, glancing up at him and then back at her nails, as if they were way more interesting than he was.

"I'm sorry." He rushed out, his voice full of shame.

"What the hell Toby?" She snapped her voice full of aggravation. "You kiss me," She said meekly, slowly looking up from her nails, and up to the drunk people poorly dancing in the middle of the room. "Then just run off, and leave me wandering around looking for you for the past thirty minutes."

"I'm sorry." He said again looking at her, his eyes full of desperation and shame. "I-I-" He stuttered "I had a little too much wine, I guess I wasn't thinking straight. I saw Holly starring at us, and I just took it to far." He rushed out. He felt terrible lying, he hated lying. Yet his whole friendship with her was full of lies. He's loved her for the last two years. In her eyes, he just thought of her as a friend. He wanted to be honest, he really did, but, sometimes the truth did worse than lies. He vowed to himself that he would move on from her starting today. He had too, after what happened with Holly, he felt hurt, and broken. Wren did take part in making him feel that way, yes. But Toby wasn't one for revenge. He wasn't about to do the same to Wren, that Wren had done to him fairly long ago.

"So," She said furrowing her eye brows her voice stunned. "You just kissed me because of Holly." She mumbled questionably.

"Yes," He said as sternly as he could. "It was stupid, I know."

"Well, was she mad?" Spencer finally asked after a long pause between the two friends, that was filled with 'woos' coming from the dance floor, and the song 'I'm sexy and I know it' pouring out of the speakers.

"No," He mumbled. "She wanted to re-start things," He fiddled his thumbs. "Not just as friends, but as more-"

"What did you say?" Spencer asked looking at him for the first time in the whole conversation. There was curiosity in her voice mixed with anticipation, and maybe even jealousy?

"I didn't really say anything." He mumbled clearing his throat. "She kind of thought-"

"Oh," Spencer widened her eyes, and nodded in realization. She darted her head away from Toby, and looked at her heels. Her feet were killing her, and she wished she could just take her heels off. "Well if we weren't-" She said awkwardly. "You know," She mumbled. "What.. have you had said?" She asked slowly as if she was scared of the answer.

"That it was too late." He answered instantly. "She was with my best friend."

"So?" Spencer shot. "It's not like your friends with him now." She mumbled. Which led Toby to swallow hard. Spencer starred at Toby, after she didn't hear a response. "You're still friends with him?" She snapped. "How? Why?"

Toby licked his lips, he was done with lying. "That best friend," Toby stated slowly. "Was- Is kinda Wren."

"What?" Spencer's eyes bulged nearly out of her eye sockets. "What-" She breathed. "Why didn't you tell me?" She snapped stunned. "What!" She repeated mostly to her self.

"I didn't want you to look at him differently, it was in the past." Toby shrugged innocently. He glanced over at her shyly.

She quickly tore her eyes away from him again,and gulped.

"Wow," She mumbled simply.

"Yeah," Toby bit his lip.

"You're a really good guy Toby." She said solemnly looking at him again, her eyes full of honesty.

"Don't hate Wren." Toby blurted. "He's changed." Toby said surely. He hadn't done anything with Spencer. Toby was the one who disregarded Wren's feelinfs. Toby was the one to forget about Wren's feelings, and be selfish, only thinking of his own. He suddenly felt even lousier than before. Now, a million more problems filling in head. He felt like Spencer, he need to take a breath. But, there was so much going on he just couldn't. Should they tell Wren about their little kiss? It would just hurt him in the long run, and the kiss wasn't headed any where, any ways.

"Spencer," Toby spoke up. Spencer looked at him with a gleam in her eye that was filled of curiosity. "Can we not tell Wren about our little kiss?" He said softly.

"Sure," Spencer said questionably. "I guess." She mumbled. "Why?"

"It's just-" Toby fumbled on his words as he scratched the back of his head. "I don't want to mention running into Holly." He said surely. It was half true, he really didn't feel like talking over tea with Wren about his encounter with Holly. It would be an awkward conversation, and both of the guy's were over the girl with the short black hair, and emerald green eyes anyways.

"Oh," Spencer nodded in understanding. "Of course."

Shortly after, the two made their way back to the hotel. They stayed way longer than Toby had planned, and more came out of the night than he ever imagined. He imagined just having an awfully boring night, as he listened to his relatives compliment Jenna. Instead he ended up kissing Spencer, and as heavenly as the moment was, he felt awful. He had so many emotions filling him, that he was surprised he hadn't erupted. He felt pleasure from the warm and magical kiss, he felt guilty about totally disregarding Wrens feelings and lying to almost everyone, and most of all he felt heart ache over knowing that the kiss would never happen again. It just couldn't. That wasn't going to happen. He had to let go of his feelings for Spencer and just move on.

The next day the pair headed back to Philadelphia,the ride home was much quieter than the ride to Gettysburg. It wasn't even the comfortable silence that sometimes floated between the two, it was an awkward silence. As if both were uncomfortable and wanted to get the hell out of that car. Finally, after what seemed like forever they arrived home, greeted eagerly by Wren. The three friends went out to dinner, and when Wren asked how the weekend was, both Toby and Spencer just replied with a 'good'. Not specifying on anything to do with Holly, the kiss, or anything else that went on between the two. That was just how it was going to have to be.

Was this chapter horrible? Too slow? Tell me in the reviews, because I honestly don't know what to think about this chapter.:x 10 reviews and i'll upload tomorrow (: Thank you for all the reviews by the way, you guys are awesome! Until next time! Bye bye!