Chapter 5

Darcy was slowly finding her way around the Tower as days went by. Phil was finally able to walk a bit, so far using it to pace around his room. Stark -who insisted on being called Tony or Supreme Overlord- proposed him to build a wheel chair. The answering look Coulson gave him could have withered trees, and send the billionaire running back to his lab with his tail between his legs. Darcy smiled, and bumped her shoulder against Phil's.

"Don't worry, boss. Soon you won't have to worry about that anymore."

Phil had grimaced, and hadn't commented farther, turning back to his report, trying to blow off some pent up frustration via frowning. Darcy wasn't sure he was getting anywhere with that, but hey. Super G-Man at work here. Nothing he can't do, he's just too awesome for that.

Limitations are so 2011.

She learned that sometimes, despite all his competency, logic, and experience, an eye roll and a shake of the head was the best way to deal with Phil Coulson. No wonder he was the one designated to keep an eye on Stark. He was stubborn, hard-headed and single minded when he wanted to be. No wonder Fury thought he would needed someone with a degree in Political Science to watch out for him, because Coulson had sent one of his nurses away crying one day when his condition was grating on him more than usual. Darcy simply glared at him, hit him upside the head and ignored his sullen mood until the poor woman was gone.

Then, she found an episode of CSI: Miami, and hid the remote on the top of the shelf, which Coulson couldn't reach with his injuries. He didn't talk to her for a day after that, claiming that torture was forbidden in the Tower. Darcy once again rolled her eyes.

"Tony Stark makes the Tower's rules, and I don't think he'd like that you've distressed the personnel he pays for because you threw a hissy fit."

Coulson pursed his lips, glaring at her some more. Darcy couldn't help but wonder how agents would react to that look. They would probably die of cardiac arrest at such a display of emotion.

"Stark is a worst patient than I'll ever be."

Darcy stared, unimpressed at him.

"Yes. And he's the one paying for his nurses."

Coulson glared at her some more, but behaved himself afterwords, under the threat of another round of CSI: Miami. However he did make Darcy swear she would never tell anyone about his weakness. Darcy snorted and agreed. And bumped her shoulder against his.

"Your secret's safe with me, Elrond."

He sighed, pressing the heel of his hands to his eyes.

"I'm stuck with this nickname until the day I die, aren't I?"

Darcy chuckled evilly, playful smirk tugging her lips.

"Don't be ridiculous, elves don't die."

He chuckled, despite himself.

"Any chance you'd keep it to yourself?"

Darcy snorted, and curled herself at the foot of his bed like she often did, her smirk stretching to a full, scary, probably slightly psychotic, smile. Coulson, now immune to it, waited for her answer. She leaned forward.

"Now, now, boss. You can't ask me to surrender all my good blackmail material."

He groaned, and let his head fall back against the head board of the bed. She chuckled, and fished out her Stark Phone -given to her by Tony the day after she arrived, which she guessed was his apology for forgetting about him-, opened Angry Birds, and stared hunting green pigs. Coulson pursed his lips in distaste.

"You spend hours of your time flicking birds at pigs, in an attempt to rescue virtual eggs, and yet you dare maligning my taste in TV?"

Darcy didn't even look up.

"If you shut up and be nice, Elrond, I'll tell them Fury's Galadriel."

"You're not playing fair Cayenne."

"Never said I would. I'm a poli-sci graduate."

OOOOOOOOO

The major change to living in the Tower was that she had human contact outside of Coulson and the medical staff. She didn't count Fury as a human contact. She had to go to the kitchen to get food for her and Phil, and that meant meeting the rest of the household on occasion. Pepper would sometimes be in the lounge and would take a few seconds to inquire about Phil, despite coming by every day she was in the country. ]Otherwise, she was always running around, trying to get wrangle Tony for something or another, or doing damage control for Tony. Darcy always waited for the other woman to initiate the contact, not entirely sure she wouldn't be bitten if she interrupted at the wrong time. JARVIS assured Darcy that Pepper was vaccinated for rabies, though.

But, all in all, Pepper was very nice to her, enforcing JARVIS's statement that anyone taking care of Phil would be welcome in the Tower. Darcy smiled, and nodded. She still hadn't gotten around to telling her parents she was living with Tony Stark, first because they would draw the wrong conclusions, and second because she had no idea how to explain how she got there. She couldn't talk to them about Thor, and as much as she thought about the situation, the plausible explanations all implied Thor somehow.

Yeah, she was aware that her most believable explanations included a super powered alien who crashed on Earth after being exiled by his father. But honestly, how else was she supposed to justified living with one of the richest men on Earth, babysitting one of the head's of a secret agency? And she didn't even consider about telling them about the Hulk. They would march right up there to drag her back home.

Poor Dr. Banner. Aside from Pepper, he was the one she was most likely to run into. Every few days, he'd come into Coulson's room, take one look at her, and would leave with a promise to come back a little while later with something home cooked and ridiculously delicious. Phil would thank him warmly for taking care of Darcy, and the woman would grumble she could take care of herself, thank you very much. Cue disbelieving looks from the both of them. Repeat every few days.

Other times, Darcy would be the one cooking, and Dr. Banner -'call me Bruce-Or Shrek!-No, Tony, just Bruce' -would walk in, without really realizing it before he was sitting at the isle, and Darcy would slip a portion of whatever she was cooking in front of him. He would thank her with a look, and dig in, savouring it. Darcy wasn't the best cook in the world, but she could whip up some pretty amazing comfort food.

As far as she was aware, both Bruce and Tony lived down in the labs, only coming out to get some food and shower every once in a while. To get them away from that was usually far more trouble than it was worth, especially since when forced, they would simply continue talking science until someone gave up and sent them back. It was easier to just wait for them to emerge.

Darcy liked to think that she and Bruce got along so well because the both of them had a bit of difficulty accepting they were actually there, living with Tony Stark and everything that it entails.

And sometimes, for no reason she was aware of, Tony would send them a message in the middle of the afternoon to tell them not to cook anything, he would take care of it. They would end up, all of them, Pepper, Tony, Bruce, Darcy and Phil, sitting in the agent's room with various types of take out, talking about movies, and music, and almost feeling like normal people.

Darcy also learned that Agent Romanov and Barton lived at some S.H.I.E.L.D. issued location, even though they came to the Tower almost every day to see Phil. Darcy knew Tony had tried to convince them to move in as well, luring them with custom built floors for them alone and all that jazz, but neither of them accepted. From the little Phil told her about them, they still had difficulty with the concept of the team, and saw their get together at the chitauri invasion as a one time situation, and not like the beginning of something Tony thought it was.

Phil was always pretty tight lipped about his agents, but as he once told Darcy, they didn't like her much and wouldn't appreciate Phil volunteering information about their lives to her. Or anyone, but her at the moment, since Phil didn't really talk to anyone else.

And Tony, well she didn't see much of him, except on the special evenings. He was either in his lab, or at Stark Industries, or on very, very rare occasion, sleeping. The best way to know was if you could see Bruce. If yes, Tony wasn't in the lab. The billionaire was very possessive of his Science Bro, as he called Bruce. To the point where even Pepper made a comment about being concerned about her boyfriend's sexual orientation. Tony answered with a slow grin.

"Pepper, you know I've always cheated on you with Science."

Pepper rolled her eyes, but didn't answer, and exited the room, just slow enough for Darcy to notice her small smile. Tony leaned on Bruce's shoulder.

"Sorry, Big Guy, but you're not my type."

Bruce gave a dry look to Tony, and patted the billionaire's head.

"Don't worry Tony, I think I'll live through the pain."

OOOOOOO

Darcy was getting attuned to the rhythm of the house, it's quirks. As Bruce and Pepper predicted, she didn't get used to it, because there was no way to get used to a robot interrupting her shower to dowse her with a fire extinguisher. She received the brand new Stark Pad as an apology for that one. Apparently Tony made the mistake of telling Bruce in front of Dummy that she was "smoking hot."

So, the point was, when she walked to the kitchen at seven thirty this morning to get breakfast for her and Coulson, she wasn't expecting to hear an argument coming from it. She frowned. Pepper usually argued with Tony in the living room or in their room. Bruce waited at least until ten in the morning, to be sure he wasn't waking anybody.

She moved forward cautiously, not wanting to walk in on a stranger, because she was in pajamas and her hair looked like an eagle's nest. At first, it looked like Tony was alone, so Darcy elected he was talking through a phone, and that he wasn't mad enough yet to argue with imaginary people, but as she got close, she heard the quiet, rough voice that was answering him. When she popped her head in the room, her assumption was proven right, and Barton was there, arms crossed. She saw his eyes flit to her immediately, and that jeopardized any chance she had of walking away, acting as if she saw nothing. So she didn't even bother, walking right in, and manoeuvring around them to start preparing breakfast for her and Coulson. Tony flailed his arms around.

"Why do you insist on living there? You're miserable."

Barton sneered, and his shoulders tensed even more.

"I'm not. And I have nowhere else to go."

Stark snorted.

"Pull the other one. You know perfectly well I'm inviting you to come here. Will you just shut up and do it already?"

Barton pursed his lips.

"I don't need your charity."

Tony sighed.

"It's not charity. I built a floor for you because you're a part of the team, and right now it's wasted, because you're not living here."

"Why do you care."

Tony shrugged, cool as a cucumber where Barton looked nearly ready to kill.

"I don't. But I don't want to waste space in my Tower. And a certain agent is pestering me about it."

Tony sighed, and continued.

"Look, I know how it is, to have people ignoring and avoiding you unless they need you. To have people sneering at you behind your back because they're scared. And I know it makes you miserable. Move in."

Barton waved an arm around.

"I'm pretty sure there's people around here that don't want me here either."

Darcy wasn't a genius, but she knew that one was directed to her. She paused from where she was buttering toast, and answered without looking up.

"I want you to move in."

Tony let out a triumphant shout, and Darcy could picture perfectly the way he threw his arms up.

"Great! See there? You're moving in, the young lady said so. Pack, I'm sending people tomorrow to get your things here."

Tony exited the room, and Barton appeared suddenly by her side, lips pursed.

"Why did you say that?"

Darcy sighed, and reached for the blueberries.

"Because it's true."

"Why?"

There was a lot of subtext to this short question. Why would she do that to herself, when she didn't like him. Why would she agree to live with him? The answer was simple, and she was a bit surprised he didn't think of it himself.

"Because Phil wants you to."

She pushed herself from the counter, breakfast tray in hand, moving back to the agent's room. Barton called from behind her.

"Everything for Phil, then?"

She refused to answer to that question, and its double meaning. Instead she replied over her shoulder.

"It's not often Tony bares his soul, you should mark the date."

And she was gone. He probably answered with something, but she didn't care anymore at that point. She did her good deed of the day. Phil's eyes were closed when she entered the room, but Darcy wasn't fooled. The agent hated sleeping during the day, it made his head fuzzy, and threw off his balance.

"Hey Boss, breakfast time."

His eyes fluttered open, zeroing quickly on the food.

"Thanks."

She waved her hand laxly, dropping on the chair beside the bed, pulling the rolling table between them.

"It's alright. Hey, Barton's moving in tomorrow."

Phil's eyebrows shot up.

"About time. Stubborn idiot."

Darcy smiled.

"Do you think Romanov will follow?"

He shrugged, gazing at his toast as if it held the answer of Darcy's question. Well, if it did, they could make some pretty good money by selling it on ebay. If not, well Coulson was stalling.

"I don't know. Natasha values her privacy. Maybe if both me and Clint put up a really good case."

Darcy frowned at that.

"But, aren't she and Barton living together? I mean, since they're together and all?"

Coulson looked a bit puzzled for a moment before smiling.

"They don't, and they aren't together. Just very close friends. Saving each others life a couple of times does that to people."

Darcy nodded, and finished her breakfast. Her couple radar must have been wreaked sometime during the madness, because she had been sure the both of them were bumping uglies, and she was never wrong about things like that usually. Ah well, if it meant that no baby would come out of these two together, she was grateful. The world didn't need to endure that pain. Coulson was looking at her with a speculative look on his face, but shook his head when she raised an eyebrow in question.

Times like this, she really wished there was some way to contact and talk to Jane, because she really, really needed some girl talk about what happened in the tower.

OOOOOOOOO

The transition from five inhabitants to six went smoothly. Mostly because Barton was never around, or if he was, he was hidden pretty well. No one really saw him, unless Bruce was cooking. He avoided Darcy's roster night on principle, and no one else could really cook. JARVIS once informed Coulson that the archer usually came out at night when no one else was around to raid the fridge.

Otherwise, he still went to talk to Coulson once a day, during which Darcy did her best to make herself scarce. One reason being that she didn't want to start an argument with Barton in front of Phil. Another being that most of what they talked about was classified and way above her pay grade.

But once, Bruce asked her to please go tell the two men that the lunch was ready, and she went to them, instead of waiting for Barton to come and get her. When she got closer, she heard Barton's voice, more passionate than she ever heard it, escaping from the door he didn't close completely.

"Come on, Phil, it'll do you some good."

The Agent gave a long suffering sigh in return.

"Clint, I don't know if you've noticed, but I can barely walk around my room by myself."

The archer continued what was, according to their tone, a long standing argument.

"You need to get some air, Phil. A change of scenery."

"That's why I moved out of the carrier."

"Yeah, you moved out of room and into another one. That doesn't count, Phil."

There was a sigh, and Darcy decided to intervene. It wasn't as if the discussion was going anywhere. If she had to make a guess, it had been running around in circles for a while. She knocked on the door. The noise stopped and she pushed it open to stick her head in.

"Bruce says the lunch is ready."

Clint nodded, and exited, his sullen mood hanging like a cloud around him, perverting everything it touched. Darcy took a deep breathe, and looked at Phil.

"I'll be back in five."

"No need."

She twisted to see his face. He looked exhausted, like he hadn't been in a few weeks, and his face was pale. Darcy tightened her jaw, locking her knees in place, to keep her from hunting Barton down and beating him up. She'd warned him.

"Phil?"

He shook his head, sliding down the covers, to settle himself to sleep. Darcy frowned, debating whether to go in to make sure he wasn't sick. But Phil wouldn't appreciate it, especially if he wasn't sick. She grimaced when he winced, and rasped a breathe to talk to her.

"I'll sleep now. Please, take the afternoon off, get out of here a bit, it'll do you some good."

Darcy was at lost for words. He never slept during the day. He hated to. And he never asked her to stay away. She knew he didn't mind when she did, but he let her come and go as she pleased.

"Phil?"

He sighed again.

"Please, Darcy."

She bit her lip and finally sighed, and left, closing the door behind her. When she was sure Phil couldn't hear her anymore, she stormed off. By that time she found Barton, he was seated in the kitchen, eating, and she didn't want to have this conversation in public. So she swallowed her rant, and took her plate from Bruce as well. Tony and Bruce disappeared quickly into the lab, and Darcy got up at the same time as Barton, barrelling into him. She hit him as hard as she could on the chest, which meant he probably barely felt it.

"What's your problem?! Which part of he's weak is too hard for you too grasp?"

Barton's expression went from blank to defensive in a fraction of second.

"He's not going to get better if you keep mothering him."

Darcy bristled.

"No, the way to achieve that is to exhaust him to the point where he needs to sleep in the

afternoon, something he never does."

Clint sneered, walking toward her.

"Look kid, I don't care if you appointed yourself his bodyguard-"

"Fury appointed me his bodyguard."

Barton pursed his lips, which wasn't attractive, at all.

"Fury also lied to us all about Phil being dead."

Darcy cried.

"Well, he was probably right, because you seem pretty intent on sending him to the morgue for good."

Barton shook, and his look went from annoyed to downright mad.

"I would never do that."

Darcy hit is chest again.

"Well, you're on the path. You know, for someone who's blaming himself so much for the deaths he caused, you're not too careful about his."

Barton was going to hit her. She saw it. She would probably deserve it. She knew he cared about Phil, but she just couldn't let him worsen his condition. Finally he hissed.

"You have no idea…"

She smiled tightly.

"Thanks, I got that part the first time."

He leaned in.

"You can't like it. Being stuck in here all the time."

Something clicked.

"You're the one who made Phil feel bad about keeping me here, you asshole!"

He leaned back. She walked to him, poking him in the chest to make her point.

"Don't you ever dare to use me as an argument with Phil again. Ever. Clear Barton?"

His eyes flamed.

"Who do you think you are, you little arrogant-"

"What's going on here?"

A newcomer was standing in the doorway, eyeing them gingerly. Clint straightened, and took a step back from her, face blank once more. He gave the blond man a tight nod.

"Captain."

Darcy, who had been salivating over the man's muscles up until now, snapped her eyes back up, staring. Captain America. Holy shit.

She had just been caught in a shouting match with Barton by Captain America. Fuck her life. She felt herself redden to the roots of her hairs. The blond answered to Clint's nod.

"Hawkeye. It's pleasure to see you again."

He looked to Darcy, arching an eyebrow.

"I'm sorry, I don't know you."

Clint answered before Darcy could.

"Darcy Lewis. She's the one taking care of Coulson."

Steve turned around so fast, Darcy was worried he snapped his neck.

"Coulson? Agent Coulson? But he's dead!"

"Nope."

Tony appeared behind Captain, cleaning his hands on a rug. He nodded to the man. Darcy decided she was supposed to say something.

"It's an honour, Captain."

He cocked his head.

"Steve, please Miss Lewis."

She nodded.

"Then it's Darcy."

"A pleasure, Darcy."

Then he turned to Tony and Clint.

"Agent Coulson is not dead?"

Tony shook his head.

"Turns out Fury's a big, fat liar. Who's surprised? Note the complete absence of hands. Anyway, it was to give us something to fight for, to glue us all together, or some bullshit like that. So he's alive, and mending, because he did got stabbed."

Darcy pipped in.

"And he did flatline."

Steve pondered it, and spoke slowly.

"Can I see him?"

Darcy smiled tightly.

"No, you can't." She glared at Barton. "He's sleeping at the moment."

The archer seemed a bit sheepish at the moment, realizing he just kept Phil from seeing his childhood hero once more. Tony shook his head anyway, and clamped an almost clean hand on Steve's shoulder.

"You couldn't anyway, you haven't come here for the Agent."

Steve gave him a worried look.

"I don't even know why I'm here, Tony."

The billionaire gave him an easy grin.

"So that you can move in!"

Steve sighed, and gave a tolerant look to Tony.

"I can't, Tony. I still have things to do. I'm sorry."

The billionaire pouted, put out by what seemed to be another refusal to be added to a bunch of others.

"Ah come on, Cap. Even Barton moved in!"

Steve shook his head.

"I'm glad for him, Tony, but I can't. Not now."

Tony's eyes lighted up.

"I'm holding you on your 'not now', you stand warned. Anyway, I called you to talk about your uniform. I thought of a few tweaks I could do to improve it. What about you come to the lab?"

And he dragged the poor Captain toward the stairs, while the blond threw them a helpless look over his shoulder. Darcy snorted, before realizing she was once again alone with Barton in the room. The archer was still looking at where the Captain had disappeared, looking a bit guilty. Darcy knew why, Coulson would have loved to see the Captain again, and would have taken a great pleasure in helping defend his idol against Tony. After a long while, he turned his blue stare to her, boring into the deeper parts of her soul. This close she couldn't help but notice that his eyes were spectacular when they weren't hard as diamonds. It was really a shame. Such pretty, pretty eyes.

She swallowed, and he did the same.

"I'm sorry, Lewis. I'll try not to upset Phil anymore in the future."

She bit her lip, and nodded.

"It's okay, if you can talk Steve into staying long enough to talk to him."

He nodded, tersely.

"I'll see what I can do."

And he left.

OOOOOOOOO

Phil did get to talk to Captain America. Darcy, despite his instructions, went to check on him just before dinner, and found him awake. She had smiled at him, and had let Steve in. She left them alone, but got a glimpse of Phil's adorable star struck face. She smiled sweetly.

She spent the rest of the evening with Bruce, listening to the scientist rant about what Tony and Steve had been up too all this time. Apparently, it had been worse than shopping with girls. Tony had prepared five potential versions of the uniform, which he insisted Steve try on one after the other.

When they had decided which one they liked most, they tested all the gadgets Tony managed to put in it, most of them a sane person wouldn't even have considered. But no one ever tried to pretend Tony was sane.

Bruce simply seemed satisfied Steve and Tony were now able to be in the same room without being at each other's throats. Darcy nodded, hoping she would at some point get there with Clint and Natasha, but she wasn't ready to bet a lot of money on that. Not until Phil was up, and able to care of himself.

When she fell asleep on the couch with Bruce, and woke up in her own bed, she decided Steve was on her favorite person list, along with JARVIS and Bruce.

Phil wasn't. Phil was in the 'Surrogate Father' list. He was the only one on the list. Unsurprisingly.

OOOOOOOO

She woke up with a jerk, in the middle of the night. She flailed around, until she noticed the dark shape occupying her chair. She patted around for her glasses, never taking her eyes off said shape. She finally slid her lenses up her nose, and recognize the Widow's flaming mane.

She swallowed.

The spy didn't move. Didn't talk. Darcy wasn't even sure she breathed. Maybe Tony decided to play a prank and install a wax statue of Natasha in her room. She straightened slowly, arching an eyebrow.

Finally, deliberately, Romanov cocked her head to the side.

Darcy knew it must have to do with what she said to Barton that afternoon. She had been warned not to hurt him, and she did anyway. The spy was there to teach her why she was called the Black Widow.

Darcy had no idea what to do, so she shifted her weight to her right arm, and waved with her left, speaking hoarsely.

"Hey."

The woman didn't move. Until suddenly she was on her feet. Darcy still sleepy brain missed the second where she actually moved, and strangely thought of Twilight, were Bella could never keep up with Edward. Maybe Romanov was a vampire. It'd explain so much.

Darcy barely restrained her groan. She hated her sleepy brain. It never focused on the right thing. Who cared about Twilight? And Romanov would definitely not need her teeth to kill Darcy.

The red head slowly walked to the bed, never leaving Darcy with her eyes.

She stopped when she was beside her shoulder, and Darcy didn't move. Anything. She wasn't even breathing. She couldn't breathe.

She couldn't risk upsetting the spider..

Finally, Romanov spoke, quietly, breaking the silence of the night.

"Be careful."

And she left, so quickly that Darcy once again had difficulty keeping up.

The words hadn't been as aggressive as last time.

They hadn't any been less foreboding, though.