Merlin. He was in trouble now. As soon as Hermione left, he regretted what he said. He had a deep fear of ever harming those who were closest to him. The last people who had been close to him – Sirius, James, and Peter, had all escaped fine, but they had also been animagi. The wolf was less dangerous surrounded by other animals that he accepted as his pack mates. He had been young and foolish during his school days. He had yet to see the devastation that Greyback and the others had done. He had seen innocent men, women, and children mauled. They were not mere wolves. Wolves hunted for food. Werewolves hunted for pure pleasure. They didn't need their victims for food. The inner wolf had an animalistic need to rip and tear into flesh, watching the blood and organs spill out of the flimsy human shell. If Remus had seen those terrors while he was in Hogwarts, he would never had permitted the rest of the Marauders to accompany him on the full moon.
He couldn't bear it if he attacked Hermione. During his brief stint at Hogwarts, the one memory that stood out to him was waking up in the Forbidden forest. He was covered with fresh scars – which was nothing new- but he could smell blood, blood that was not his own, on his body. The last thing he could remember was Sirius desperately trying to wrestle him away from Harry, Ron, and Hermione. He could remember his last desperate thoughts of pleaseohmerlinno, notthemnothere, and hatred. He hated himself. No one should have to worry about their teacher ripping them into pieces. No one should have to live with a danger like that.
Yet, Hermione willing volunteered, and fought, to live with him. Which was why he needed to keep her safe. He had so few people who allowed themselves to be close to him. Thanks to Umbridge's new Werewolf Registry Acts, most people knew he was a werewolf and avoided him like the plague. Even for those who didn't know about his lycanthropy, Remus felt obligated to tell them almost as soon as they said hello. He had gotten to close to people in the past only to have them break his heart and spirit as soon as they learned what he was.
The little voice in his head reminded him that Hermione had kept his secret. She possessed enough maturity as a student to figure out his secret and then keep it. That alone had been more than most adults had done. He owed her so much, even then. And now, for her to keep him from the horrible fate of Azkaban, giving up her future to be with him. That was another reason he was so intent on pushing her away. The more he pushed her away, as much as it killed him, was better for her. She could amend things with Ron. She would still have time to go out and met a man her age. She could do so many things that he was holding her back from.
You just said Hermione had always been mature. You think she doesn't know what she wants? What marrying you meant? No matter how hard he tried to push away the little voice in his head, he couldn't do it. It was right. Hermione knew what she wanted and knew what her actions meant. She had hardly ever been anything but vastly more mature and wise beyond her years, and yet he treated her like she wasn't his equal. He was treating her like she was a little child, or his naïve nursemaid. He had to accept that she was there to stay. He had to accept their relationship was a very strong friendship – if not above that. That was what he wouldn't permit. He would stop pushing her away, but he would not let her get close enough so that he would continue to fall in love with her.
Now he just had to find Hermione and apologize profusely, as soon as he got out of this infernal hospital. Judging by the bandages still wrapped around him and the flaring pain from his ribs, he was in no state to leave anytime soon. Some of the minor cuts and scratches had healed up, but the deeper ones were still quite fresh and angry looking. Another handful of scars to be added to his already plentiful collection. With any luck, he would be out of St. Mungo's in a couple of days. Until then he would just have to wait and pray that Hermione would be able to forgive him.