DAY EIGHT

In the morning, I struggle to come to terms with that fact that Sadie had fallen the previous day. I feel like I did on the day of the reaping. I keep telling myself that she is gone but I simply can't accept it. What did she ever do to deserve it? I wish I had been there to help her, or I wish it had been me that they killed.

I am now in a massive moral dilemma. I don't know whether to just give up, or whether or not to go against everything I believe in and engage in combat in order to win this for Sadie.

I am now in the final five, so is the boy from three. This is huge. Its hard to explain how massive this is. Every district apart from one, two and four will now be backing me and three. Winning this now isn't out of the equation. As I'm thinking that I hear a little tune being played. I vigilantly crawl out of my tree. I've just received another sponsor. I open it up and read the note.

'Every one was moved yesterday, you deserve this. Spike x'.

In the box is a tub of rice, sent from my district. This is the biggest meal I've eaten since being in the Capitol. It feels and tastes fantastic. As I openly thank my district I shed more tears.

Now I need to stop feeling sorry for myself. I need to take action in order to win this, for Sadie. I crawl out of the tree and head towards the pond where Sadie died yesterday. The walk feels lonely and sad, just like me. It takes about half an hour before I reach the opening and my head rushes when I arrive. I look at the spot where Sadie lay, it feels so surreal. I walk over to it and find that the lilly I placed on her chest has been left on the floor. I clutch it and hold it to my chest, knowing that it is the one thing still holding me together right now. It is still in perfect condition. It smells so sweet and feels so out of place in this disgusting, vile arena.

I walk over to the pond where I once again fill up my water bottle and wash the knife I used yesterday when I so instinctively reacted to the sound of Trey from two, rustle in the bushes.

I sit for a moment and reflect. Nothing much goes through my mind and for some reason, right now I feel at peace. I'm not happy, I'm not even okay, but there's a massive wave of peace running through my body which in seconds turns into motivation and will power. Will power to get out of this place alive.

Before I know it, I hear a tune and see that I have received another sponsor. I open it up and another note from Spike.

'D8 x'

Inside is a blanket. I presume D8 means district 8 as that is the District where textiles are produced. I'm touched that another district would want to help me. I've now said Thank you so many times that it no longer feels sincere.

As I'm enjoying my rice under my blanket, I hear news that makes me feel faint and wheezy. It's the voice of a game maker.

'Tributes, we are holding a feast at the Cornucopia and you are all invited. You have until sunset or you will suffer the consequences'.

I have no choice. I have to go and fight other tributes now, for what may only be a grape in a bag. I am again filled with dread and crawl out of my tree. I leave all my belongings, however I wear my spears, and keep my slingshot and knife in my belt. I power walk towards the cornucopia.

I dread the walk to the cornucopia, why is this compulsory? It hasn't been in previous years. The walk is so tiring. Once I reach the edge of the forest and see the vast plain of swamp, I realise I am close. I must be extra vigilant whilst navigating the swamp. It's a completely open area that surrounds the cornucopia, before I hit the wall of grass which protects my view from the cornucopia.

I arrive whilst the sun is still an hour or so away from sunset, and so I sit in the grass, listening carefully for the sound of footsteps. The table is yet to rise and I am just to the left of the cornucopia.

No one seems to be there yet, but none of the bags have been taken. We must all be doing the same thing. Just stood there, watching to see who goes first. I brave it. I run out and before I can blink, all the other tributes are running out too. The careers seem to have now split up as they all appear from different locations. I see my blue bag with the number '12' on it. As I sprint down the dunes, my cadence is so high that I think I might fall over, but the adrenaline of the situation will not let me go any slower. I get to the table where just as I am about to reach my bag I am knocked to the floor and fall with an all mighty thud, awkwardly on my bar of spears. When I get my bearings, I see it was the boy from three. He's stood there frozen, shell shocked looking at me, not knowing what to do. Before I can get my knife out to eliminate him from the competition a shot of fear runs through his eyes and he escapes. I get back to my feet and grab my bag, ready to sprint back into the woods. It's going well so far but as I turn around, Natalia from one throws an axe at me. I do not realise the threat from her as I am too busy watching Drusus charging at us at mac nine. The axe hits my in the ribs, but thankfully not with blade. I'm so full of adrenaline at this point that I only feel the impact and no pain, but I let out a scream at the sheer thought that an axe just hit me. I pick up the axe and run towards the forest. Natalie runs towards me but I swing at her with the axe. She ducks but her right arm remains in the air as I sever her fingers. I don't even think about my actions, I just run and hope that no one will be around my tree.

I initially stop in the growth at the edge of the open area and watch the callous fight between Drusus, Natalia and the girl from two. I watch Natalia laying on the floor screaming at the fact I have just cut her fingers off. I feel awful, especially when I see how Drusus shows no sympathy. He just stabs her multiple times. Whilst he's doing this, Tania takes the opportunity to run. However, Drusus mercilessly runs after her. He grabs her by the hair and I can hear her screaming 'no, no, no' and I want to intervene but I've worked too hard at the point to be killed. He drags her to the cornucopia where he slams her against he wall and shatters every bone in her body. I now know that I will be his next target, as my score of 9 is better than the score of 2 by the boy from 3. I expect to see him walk towards me but instead he sits down and checks out what is in his bag.

I take the opportunity to run for my life. I sprint across the swamp, feeling as though the games have just begun again, falling down into the water several times, and then into the forest heading towards by base but before I can get there the adrenaline is wearing off and the sheer pain in my rib cage is now rife. The pain is so terrible that I am hyperventilating. Every time I breath normally, it feel like my heart if being stabbed. I make it back to the tree. Just. I crawl inside and sit there still, not knowing what to do. I keep groaning and releasing noises to try and relieve the pain. I pull my t-shirt up a bit. My rib is definitely broken, and I am bleeding also. It is nothing serious but the broken rib could be a massive burden.

I explain this out loud in the hope that Spike will send me pain relief or something. Nothing comes.

I open up my bag from the feast to see what is in side it. Inside is one mouldy apple. I scream with anger and launch it out of the hole in the tree. I've just risked my life for nothing.

'What the fuck' I scream, but I soon have to put my fit of anger to rest as the pain I cause myself every time I move or scream is anger is not worth it. I am still alive. Just.

Several hours later, the sponsor song plays. I have to get out of the position I am in, where I feel no pain, and I forget how bad it is. I grab the package from outside the tree and open it up. There is no note with this package, but in it is a small bottle of a liquid of some kind. I drink it and it is the most bitter thing I have ever tasted. My mother would always tell me the worse something tastes, the better it is for you.

There's something else as well though. It's vest impenetrable to weapons. I would say it's armour but its not metal or old. I dab some iodine into my cut. It stings like hell, but it's better than getting septicaemia. I put on the vest underneath my t-shirt and I am surprised at how light and supportive it is, especially for my broken rib.

I suspect that the games will end tomorrow. I have somehow made it to the last three and I am sure that the game makers want to finish it now.

I fall asleep, in pain, but feeling positive in myself that I have eaten, had some water and have protection.

With three of us left, I have to pinch myself. I don't know how I've got this far, but some how I have. And still, I have no idea how I am going to get any further.