Smile

There were thing I never thought would happen, but they seemed to just happen now, as if those locked door of my past started to open alarming fast. Locked doors became unlocked before finally opening up completely, only to lock those doors that were always open for me before. Speaking of formerly locked doors…

Always lock the bathroom door…

So I'm guessing it wasn't locked in the first place, but still, it was a shock to see Kai and Tala in the door way as I covered my body with the bubbled from my bath. Hey, you're never too old to take a bubble bath. They feel nice, and they make me happy! That's all the matters! "Are we interrupting?" Tala voiced folding his arms over his chest.

"uh…" I gathered more bubbles to my lap, there was hardly any left, shoot, "yeah," I blushed. Now this was beyond awkward. Uh… well I know it's only awkward after you say it is but look at it this way—Two gay guys in my bathroom while I'm in the bathtub taking a bath… yeah, I think you can understand where I'm coming from. "Umm, can you wait outside?"

Kai chuckled, "sure," he shook his head, closing the door after he and Tala left.

I glanced down at Draciel in his little tub beside the bath; you know the ones that you wash babies in? Yeah, I baby my turtle. He is great, and awesome, and cool… and cute for a turtle. I unplugged the tub (my bath) with my toes, because I'm a monkey like that, quickly grabbing the towel from the rack as I left the tub. The turtle watched me from his own tub. Spoiled little thing. "Come on buddy, it's time to put you back in your home," I told the reptile. The turtle watching me with those little eyes of his as I picked him up, and wrapped him in a hand towel. That's right, a hand towel.

I should get him his own towel for Christmas! That would be so cool! It'll have a little turtle on it and everything, it'll be soft and fuzzy… it would be SOOOOOooooo cool! I opened the door, my guests stood in the hallway, "I'm just going to get dressed…" I told them.

As I closed my door, turtle in hand, I heard Tala say, "We're going out, dress decently."

Dress decently? What is that suppose to mean? Don't I dress decently all the time? It's not like I go running around in my underwear, or naked for that matter… well… not anytime that the Russians know of. I think. I hope.

I placed my turtle in his little home and pulled open my closet. "Decent… I need something decent," I mumbled closing the closet doors after grabbing a green medium-large shirt, reaching into my dresser for socks, boxers and pants before throwing them all on. I stood in front of the mirror. Is this decent enough? I threw off the shirt, pulling out a white undershirt and a green flannel. Now this looked better.

I smiled to myself, pulling the corner of my lips up higher and ruffled my hair slightly. Now this should be decent enough. I pulled open my door, greeted with maroon and ice blue eyes. "Decent enough?" I voiced doing a spin. I felt so gay.

Tala grinned wolfishly, "Good enough, now let's go." The two Russian's left down the stairs, leaving me to stare at their forms in confusion; I really wish I knew where they were taking me. I trailed behind them, from putting my shoes on, to leaving the house, boarding a bus, and going to the mall. We stood in front of the fountain, the jets sprouted water into the air, the splash coating my cheeks in little microscopic droplets. I've always loved water. "We're going to tell you a little secret," the red headed Russian pulled me close, "never wear two types of baggy clothing at once."

I stared, "but that's the only kind of clothing that I have!" I exclaimed, the looks on their faces was beyond creepy. I feared for my life.

"We know." The grins pulled their cheeks up, creasing their face in a creepy way. Is it just me or are these Russian's just plain creepy? And is it just me or have I been using the word creep more often? I really need to pull open a thesaurus and find a new word to substitute creepy.

Alright, I'm going to think of all the words that I can substitute creepy with: awful, disturbing, dreadful, eerie, frightening, ghoulish, gruesome, hair-raising, horrible, nightmarish, shudder-some (I like this one), sinister, terrifying, threatening, unpleasant, weird…

Alright, so there are lots of different adjectives for creepy, maybe I really should expand my vocabulary some more. "Then why am I here?" I gulped, my eyes traveling from one tall Russian to the taller Russian.

"We're going to teach you how to make a straight man homosexual," Tala replied tightening his grip on the back of my neck as I made a horrible attempt at escape. If anything it was more of a flinch in the downwards direction.

Never let Tala and Kai take me shopping again. EVER!

They left me on my front porch hours later with bags of tight fitting pants and shirts. I could not believe that I had spent hours with those two, and not once had they started sucking face. Impressive. I groaned, kicking the front door open (which I just unlocked), carrying the bags in before dumping them in a heap on the floor. I had a lot to think about now. I've never actually thought of dressing differently, I always thought I looked great just the way that I was.

But… then again, I never got the girl, and its shaping out that I won't even get the guy either.

I sighed, closing the door, and with the flick of the wrist I proceed to lock the door as well. Dad would most likely not be home in till I was in bed, dead to the world. Tucked into my bed with hair covering my face, and drool soaking my pillow, and with a foot poking out of the covers. Typical Max sleeping habits. I placed the house keys in the bowl by the door, the mirror above it reflected to show a frown.

I don't frown.

I pulled my lips into a small, but effective smile. Everything will work out in the end Maxie-boy, I'll be fine. I don't need to get the guy in the end. Or even the girl for that matter. I can be alone, and perfectly happy. I could pull it off!

…who was I fooling? The mirror showed that frown again, blue eyes dulled.

Maybe I could be a crazy turtle guy, you know, like those crazy cat ladies… but with turtles and as a dude. That wouldn't be too bad, except of course, the fact that I'll be crazy and still alone. I don't do well with being alone. I sighed turning away from the gateway to my inner torment. Eyes clenched, "It'll be fine, I'll pull through," I whispered.

I took hold of the bags, socked feet thumbed up, louder than normal, the stairs. Just do what Kai and Tala said, wear some of these clothes tomorrow and see if Michael notices the change. "No offense Max, but you kinda look like a girl. So use that to your advantage. Show off the slight curves of your hips, and see if he looks at you." Dumping the bags in front of my desk I stripped to my underwear.

I do look like a girl… kinda. A very flat girl, but my hips were taking more to the female edge. "Why?" I cried out pulling my blonde locks, "why couldn't I be gifted with either female parts, or an actual male looking body? But noooo, I had to have the STUPID HIPS OF A GIRL!" I shouted, pulling on my hair some more.

I blinked, pulling on my cheeks, "Stupid cute face, why do you have to look so young?"

That's right… because I am young. I sighed. Enough of this, I'm going to bed.

M.B.C.R says: I kinda lost my train of thought during the shopping scene, so I just didn't really bother putting you through the torture of reading it. Don't worry, Max will show you parts of their 'shopping adventure', just not in this chapter ;P Next chapter I give Michael a more important role. I still love having the Russian's being all creepy, it provides me something to further look forward to everytime I come back to this story.

All I think about when I'm writing these chapters are, "how can I make them be a part of this chapter so I can have the word 'creepy grin' in there." God I love them.