Disclaimer: I unfortunately do not own Twilight. Too bad cuz I could use the money…yup.
Warning: This story contains disciplinary spanking, so if this bugs you, then find something else to read.
A/N: First off, as always, THANK YOU to all you readers and reviewers! You guys make this all worthwhile!
Now, we're gonna be focusing on the parents. Carlisle finally starts to realize how badly he's messed up, and Esme isn't happy.
Chapter 7: Conflict
Carlisle's POV:
My mind was reeling, a cacophony of thoughts and emotions running through me that threatened to topple me over. What had happened? Jasper, my hardened soldier had thought I was going to abandon him. He thought I was going to banish him. How? Why? Where had this come from? He was the second child today to beg me not to leave them, not to abandon them. Where…
I froze, images of Edward, Bella, Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, and Alice flashing through my mind. Oh. Oh God.
I was a complete and utter fool! How could I have not foreseen this? How could Jasper and Alice's fears have caught me so unawares when in their eyes I had done nothing but abandon my children these last few months?
Oh God, what have I done? Through my actions we had abandoned our most vulnerable child. We had left her behind without even saying goodbye. I had yet to check up on her, or to even give her much thought as the pain her absence caused was too much for me to bear. Was she fairing well? Was she suffering as Edward was?
Edward suffered greatly because of his decision and yet I had failed to console him. His despair over the loss of his mate had caused him to leave, and I had yet to even look for him. I had abandoned him to his suffering. I had failed him. I should have been helping him, shaking the misery out of him and convincing him of what a mistake he had made in choosing to leave Bella.
I had allowed Emmett and Rosalie to leave, knowing they left mostly to escape the negative emotions and atmosphere of our home, our family. Emmett was torn. He loved Bella, but he loved his mate as well, and she had pushed for us to leave. His loyalty was first and foremost to his mate, but he would hurt because he felt he had abandoned his sister. Rosalie was hurt by Emmett's hurt. She knew what he was thinking; and she would be hurt by all our suffering. As cold hearted as she could seem, Rosalie loved our family and could not stand to see us suffer. I had not helped them and so they had left. I had no idea when they were coming back, or if they were coming back at all.
Alice. Jasper. My two remaining children had been suffering these past few months and I had made minimal efforts to help them, convinced they would seek me out. I had not realized—I had not considered that they may no longer trust me. I had not considered how my actions would have seemed to them, how weak and uncaring I must seem. Alice has suffered greatly over her human past and Jasper has suffered along with her, yet I let them be. I did nothing.
Esme, my dear, sweet, loving Esme. I had left her alone in this also. She had lost four of her children in the span of a couple months, and the two that remained were clearly unhappy. She had not wanted to leave Forks, to leave Bella. I had been the one to convince her. I had been the one to assure her that everything would be just fine, and that it would all work out. How wrong I had been. Nothing was fine. Nothing was working out.
I had been so damn selfish. I had been so wrapped up in my own despair and guilt that I had abandoned my family to their own personal demons. I had failed as a husband, a father, and as a leader. My family was in shambles, and I'd done nothing as of yet to fix it.
I understood now why both Alice and Jasper had feared being abandoned. I felt so ashamed. What had I done? How could I have allowed things to come to this? Where had my head been? We never should have left Forks! I was such a fool! How could I have allowed my panicked, teenaged son to dictate my actions? I had catered to his demands like a blithering idiot, and now everyone including him was suffering the consequences. I was the father. I was supposed to be in charge. I was supposed to know best, but I had failed, I had failed miserably.
I closed my eyes and gripped a fistful of my hair as I fought back tears of frustration and guilt. Now was not the time for tears. I had to be strong. I had to fix the damage I had inadvertently caused. It was time I stepped up and put this family back together.
"What happened with Jasper?" Esme asked, breaking me out of my reverie. We were far enough away from the house now that the children and we could have some privacy. I was leaning against a tree as I heard the question, and I opened my eyes, focusing them on my wife. Her face was guarded, and I withheld a sigh of exhaustion as I knew this meant she was upset with me. She maintained her distance, making no effort to offer me any of the comfort I so desperately needed. That was fine though. This was my punishment, and I deserved every bit of it.
"As you no doubt anticipated, he lost his temper with me," I began softly, regaling her with every little detail of what happened. I told her everything Jasper said, everything I said, and every emotion I gleaned from the boy.
"I realized that Jasper's wild emotions confused not only me but him as well, which is why I suggested we take some time apart," I explained. "I want to give him some time to process through his thoughts and emotions, and I feel he will be more apt to do that once he sees for himself that Alice is just fine." I looked down at my bandaged wrist, gently rubbing at it as it still ached. Alice had done an excellent job of sealing the wound, but it was still sore and would be for several more days.
"Why didn't you spank him?" Esme then asked confusedly.
"I'm not one to beat a dead horse, Esme," I responded with a wry grin, and she clearly did not understand for she gave me first a befuddled look before narrowing her eyes. Ugh, she obviously thought I was playing with her. I sighed internally before deciding to expand lest I make things any worse.
"We have both spanked Jasper more times than I care to remember for his lack of control any time Alice is punished," I told her. "Every time he has promised to do better, and to get a control of his temper, but time and time again he has failed. A good sound spanking usually does the trick for our crazy lot, but in this case I don't think it will. I don't want to spank Jasper if I already know it will have no effect. It would feel like abuse to me."
My wife's brow furrowed slightly as she contemplated my words. "I understand where you're coming from, but I am curious as to how you plan on punishing him then? I hate to say it, but Jasper's sense of honor will not let this go. He expects to be punished, and if he isn't then"—
"Then he will question his place in the family, and my love for him, I know," I interjected tiredly, rubbing a hand up and down my face. It was at this point that I informed her of Jasper's accusations and fears, and my reassurances that his fears were unfounded.
Esme looked just as weary as I did at this point as she was rubbing a hand at her forehead. "He honestly thought"—
"Yes," I interrupted once more, not wanting to hear her say the words. "And he is not the only one. Alice too had the same fear after I punished her," I reluctantly admitted, grimacing when I heard Esme's shocked gasp.
"I reassured her as well," I rushed to add, "and I'm fairly certain I got through to her."
Esme looked disheartened and just shook her head at me. "You understand where this is coming from, don't you? You do realize why the children are having this fear, right?" she pressed, and I gave a single nod before looking away.
"Yes, I know," I responded guiltily, unable to maintain eye contact with her. Silence greeted my admittance, an uncomfortable, angry silence. I didn't need to see my wife to know she was angry.
"I told you, Carlisle, I told you that we should never have left Forks," she finally stated, her pain and anger clearly evident in her tone.
"I know," I replied tiredly, pinching the bridge of my nose.
"We abandoned Bella," she continued. "We left our baby all by herself, and for what? Because Edward panicked? Since when did the fears of one child dictate our actions? I told you we were making a mistake, Carlisle, but you didn't listen to me!"
"I know," I repeated more firmly, my own anger growing at having to hear this. I already knew all this. I knew I had screwed up. I realized the consequences of my mistakes. I didn't need her to harp on about them. I felt horrible enough as it was without her twisting the knife already embedded in my heart.
"You obviously don't know or you would have listened to me!" my wife snapped back. "You promised me that everything would work out, but look at where we are now. Look! Bella is alone, Edward is who knows where, Emmett and Rosalie are gone, and our two remaining children have been suffering in silence for months! Perhaps you haven't noticed, but everything is not alright!
"I know!" I hissed furiously, finally turning to face Esme, whose eyes widened at my outburst. "I know the situation we are in. I know what's going on, and I don't need you to tell me! Do you think I am too blind to have noticed what my decisions have led to? I made a mistake Esme, a terrible mistake and it is our children who have suffered the most because of it." I was breathing heavily now, and I turned away from Esme once more as I brought myself back under some semblance of control. Already I was feeling ashamed of how I had reacted. I should not have snapped at her.
There were several minutes of silence, and I impatiently waited for Esme to say something, but when she didn't I finally turned to look at her once more. While I had expected to still see her angry with me, I had not expected to see tears falling down her face.
Heart sinking, I immediately took several steps towards her in an effort to offer apologies and comfort, but she held a hand up stopping me in place.
"Esme," I spoke despairingly, "I'm sorry, love, please forgive me. I will fix this, I swear," I promised her. "I will bring our family back together, do not fear."
She gave no indication of having heard me as she just turned her head and walked a few paces away from me. She presented a pitiful sight, and my heart broke at her obvious suffering and the fact that she would not accept my comfort or reassurances.
It wasn't long before she stopped crying, wiping away at the remnants of her tears in slight embarrassment as she turned back towards me. Every second had been torture, and it had been a fight for me to not just get down on my knees and beg her forgiveness. While I accepted that I had made a grievous mistake, I also knew that I was not the sole blame for the situation we were in. The children were old enough to make their own decisions, and I would not take sole blame for the choices they had made. Edward did not have to run away from this family. He knew he could have come to me. He knew he could have come to his mother. I should have done more to help him, but then again, so should Edward. He made no effort to help himself, instead choosing to suffer. He pushed everyone away and sought out misery. Emmett and Rosalie left to get away from all this turmoil and to help each other. I wished they could have leant on their mother and me for help, but I also understood why they felt they couldn't get the help they needed here. Edward had still been here wallowing in self pity, and Jasper had been in a constant state of guilt, his gift wafting through the house like a poison. Leaving had been the best choice for them. As for Jasper and Alice, they too could have approached their mother or me at any point these past several months. I had made an effort to talk to them, not a good enough one apparently, but I had tried. If they did not trust me, then they should have at least trusted their mother enough to ask for help. There had been no reason for them to suffer alone.
At least, this was what I was trying to tell myself to quell the quickly growing guilt. I wanted to believe I'd done everything I could, or at least made an attempt, but was that the truth?
No, not really.
I withheld an irritable sigh, shaking my head of these thoughts. Now was not the time to be discussing this. Esme was angry with me, that was clear, and while I would gladly accept her ire, I felt now her energies would be of better use in helping our hot-headed teens.
"How was Alice?" I decided to press when she finally looked sufficiently calmed.
Esme pursed her lips as she looked at me with an unreadable expression. She clearly knew I was changing the subject, but she would allow it as like me she knew our children came first. "Alice is just fine. Fine enough that when I left her she was complaining about all the good clothes that had been ruined and trying to convince me to let her replace her entire wardrobe. Funnily enough she made it sound as though all her clothes had been destroyed in some tragedy or through spontaneous combustion."
I let out a sigh, grinning softly. If Alice was well enough to complain about her clothes, then she was alright.
"I told her absolutely not, of course, and she didn't like that," she continued saying, "but I'm not about to reward her for having thrown a tantrum."
I agree, I thought whole heartedly, giving my wife a nod. She was staring at me once more, and I was relieved to note she no longer seemed furious.
"How is your wrist? Alice told me you allowed her to seal the wound," my wife stated, giving me a knowing look. I looked down at my bandaged wrist before giving a light shrug and a sheepish smile as I replied, "I figured it would help her guilt.
Esme smiled as she nodded and said simply, "It did." I smiled back, relieved to know that my show of trust in my angel was able to help her. I felt a twinge of guilt as I recalled Alice's cries. Had I been too hard on her? I was barely beginning to work myself up when Esme changed the subject to a no less stressful topic.
"What are you going to do about Jasper?" she questioned, and I grimaced.
"I don't know," I answered honestly, "I haven't had much time to give it any thought."
"Are you going to let him get away with his temper and treating us so disrespectfully?" she pressed. "That boy knows better than to speak to us in that manner, and he definitely knows better than to threaten you."
"He does," I agreed, once more feeling weariness spread through me.
"If you don't spank him for this, Carlisle, then I will," my wife announced, and I stared at her in open astonishment. She stared back, her face a mask of determination. She was serious. I really didn't know what to say to that. My mind hadn't really been focusing on what Jasper's punishment would be, or even my impending discussion with Alice. I had been too caught up in coming to grips with how one decision could turn out such disastrous results.
"Esme, I'm not sure if a spanking is going to do anything for him. As I mentioned already I've spanked the boy before for his loss of temper and overprotectiveness regarding Alice but it's obviously not done much good," I reminded her wearily.
"Right, you've spanked him several times for this issue, but I haven't," she responded as though that made all the difference.
My brow furrowed and I gave her a curious look. "And how is you punishing him going to be any different?"
She gave me a look as though I should already know the answer, and I just sighed rubbing my hand at my forehead. I noted suddenly as my wife's condescending look softened. My heart warmed at the sight. Even when furious with me, she still loved me, and she still was looking out for me.
"If this is too much for you to deal with right now, then just say it," she told me. "You can handle Alice, and I will deal with Jasper."
"No," I responded automatically, still not completely sold on the idea of spanking Jasper. "I'm still not sure that spanking Jasper,"—
"But I am," she interjected strongly. "Look at how you reacted to Alice's disrespect and tantrum. You not only blistered her backside on the spot but you took your belt to her. Jasper exhibited even more disrespect and you've done nothing; and you are talking about not spanking him at all. How is that fair to either one of them? Besides, you know how Jasper is. I'm sure that not spanking him will prove more harmful than good to him."
I stifled a groan as I massaged my temples. I could swear I was getting a headache. I really didn't want to deal with all this right now, but my wife was making sense. Jasper needed punishment to be able to move on. He expected a spanking, a severe spanking for his actions. I recalled now the way he had reacted when I had told him I didn't plan on spanking him. He was confused, but also panicked. He didn't understand my reasoning, so in his mind he began to view my lack of punishment as my lack of caring.
Damn. Esme was right. Jasper deserved and needed a spanking. Perhaps Esme spanking him would prove more of a deterrent than when I did…No, what am I thinking? How could I subject my wife to punishing Jasper? That boy would not react well.
"Carlisle," my wife called, and I fixed my gaze on her before saying, "No, I must be the one to deal with Jasper as it was me who he disrespected the worst. I need to impress on him that I am his father, and that he has no right to speak to me as he did today, or to threaten me into giving him what he wants."
My wife smiled briefly at me having given in before shaking her head and arguing, "Jasper should be dealt with today, you know how he gets when left to dwell too long on his misbehavior. He's liable to land himself in more trouble, and you don't look up to the task."
"You've already spanked him once today," I retorted, and she gave a dismissive wave of her hand.
"I gave him a mild spanking over his pants, and I doubt if he feels any discomfort at all now," she countered. "Let me deal with this. I know you feel you should be the one, but if you can spank the children for having attacked me, then I can spank the children for having disrespected you."
I really couldn't fault her logic, but this just didn't sit right with me. I knew how much spanking our children hurt Esme, and I just wasn't sure if she could really go through with this. "Esme," I sighed unhappily, running a tired hand through my hair, "you would have to be hard on him. This volatile behavior of his cannot be allowed to continue, and so this spanking will have to be a memorable one. Can you do that?" I questioned.
Esme raised an eyebrow at me and placed her hands on her hips as she asked back, "I don't know, darling, can I?"
I immediately looked away, groaning as I knew that she was referring to my own chastisement from half a century ago. Yes, that punishment had been quite memorable, so memorable in fact that the mere memory could still cause me to cringe. My wife clearly knew my thoughts for she was smirking at me in triumph. I just shook my head at her, not ready to give in just yet.
"Esme, we are not talking about punishing me, we are talking about punishing your little southern gentleman," I told her. "You used my belt on me, but I know you would never use that object on any of the children, am I right?"
Esme frowned at my words before giving a nod of agreement.
"And as of date, you have only spanked the kids on the bare, what—twice? Three times?" I pressed, and her frown became more prominent as she answered, "Twice."
"I do not mean to belittle you, love," I added kindly, not wanting her to believe for any second I thought her incapable of punishing our lot, "but I know you, and I know how you fret over delivering but a few swats to your babies. You may feel up to the task right now, but what will you do when Jasper begins to cry out? What if he fights you? Will you be able to push on through?"
"I can do this, Carlisle," Esme responded just as determined as before, and my eyebrows rose in surprise. I truly thought I'd had her convinced.
"Tell me something," my wife asked, "if you were to punish Jasper, would you use your belt?"
I furrowed my brow, thinking over her question. My mind went over my boy's actions, and after a few seconds I shook my head negatively. I didn't like to bring out the belt except as a last resort. My soldier's behavior had been way out of bounds, but in comparison to how he used to act when in a temper, his behavior had been rather tame. As enraged as he was, Jasper never once showed any signs of wanting to attack either me or his mother, and that was progress. I relayed my thoughts to Esme, and she nodded her head in agreement.
"I can do this," she repeated, "trust me."
"This is not a matter of trust," I argued weakly, and she just raised an eyebrow as she countered, "Isn't it, though? Carlisle," my wife spoke softly, "I detest physically chastising the kids, you know that, but that doesn't make me incapable. I know you hate it as well, and I see how you suffer. I can see even now the effect Alice's punishment has had on you. Yes, this will be extremely difficult for me, but I will manage just fine."
I sighed, my resolve slipping. "Jasper will be difficult," I argued. "He will push you to punish him harder than he deserves and if you can't get him to realize that he is not in control, he will use your doubt to his advantage. And let's not forget his ability, Esme. He will feel your despair. He will feel how much you are struggling with this, and he could use that against you."
I expected my words to instill doubt in my wife, but if anything her resolve seemed to strengthen, and she gazed at me now with slightly exasperated eyes as if I was the one who did not understand.
"I am well aware of how Jasper will react in a spanking, darling," she spoke in a tone that suggested I was being rather slow. "You forget that I have spanked him before."
"Your punishments with him have always been spur of the moment, never planned, and very little discussion needed," I countered somewhat heatedly, not liking the patronizing tone she had taken with me. I was only looking out for her.
Esme let out a sigh, her expression turning frosty as she continued to speak. "I know my son Carlisle Cullen, and I am more than capable of handling him. I know how he gets when he is feeling stubborn, but he is far from the most stubborn man I have dealt with before." She stared straight into my eyes as she said this, and I knew she was referring to me. "I don't anticipate Jasper to appreciate the fact that I will be delivering his punishment. In fact, I am certain he will fight me and attempt to dissuade me from doing so as he feels I will not be as capable as you or as strong as you. I'm prepared for this. I know how to get him to give up control. I managed with you, didn't I?"
I nodded my head faintly and just stared at my wife in a new light. She was stronger than I gave her credit for. I knew this. I'd seen her inner strength arise on several occasions, but I guess I overlooked those moments. I was so accustomed to being the main disciplinarian that I rarely ever considered asking for Esme's help.
"As for my emotions, well I plan on letting my stubborn cowboy feel them. He needs to know how his actions affect others, so I will make no effort at hiding my disappointment or hurt," she declared with a fierce look.
"Alright," I found myself saying, "You can take Jasper." I continued to stare at my beautiful wife, and I felt a huge upwelling of pride and love for her. My woman was strong. Poor Jasper, I couldn't help but think suddenly. I had a feeling that Esme's punishment will be harder on my soldier than my punishment would have been.
Esme nodded her head at my words before saying, "Very well, I see no use in putting this off. Jasper has had sufficient time to see that Alice is alive and well. Why don't you take Alice out for a hunt while I deal with Jasper?" she suggested.
"I think I should stay so I can help if Jasper gives you any trouble. That boy won't dare challenge you if I'm there," I stated, but Esme just shook her head at me.
"Thank you, love, but no. Jasper and I will be just fine. Trust me, I can handle him," she insisted with confidence
I gave my wife a proud, appreciative smile as I finally gave in completely. She just gave me a small smile in acknowledgment before putting on a serious face. She took several deep breaths before turning to head back home. Before she could take off though, I stopped her.
"Esme, wait," I said, taking a few steps towards her. "I'm sorry," I told her spontaneously, and at her questioning look, I expanded. "I'm sorry for earlier with Alice, and I'm sorry for allowing everything to get so out of hand."
She pursed her lips, a flash of anger sparking in her eyes before she replied, "Now is not the time for this. We have more important matters to be dealing with."
I cringed at the suddenly cold look in her eye, and mentally smacked myself for thinking a simple apology would fix the damage I had caused. Esme was more than willing to work with me for the good of the children, but our own issues would have to wait. She would grant me no mercy until at least Alice and Jasper were back to their old, mischievous selves. Giving an internal sigh, I gave her a nod to show my understanding before we both took off for home.
We were about to get within hearing range of the kids when I decided to say one last thing. "If at any point you feel unsure, or if you need me please do not hesitate to call."
Esme glanced at me and gave a nod of understanding before I added seriously, "And I do trust you." Amber eyes snapped back to me, and I was extremely gratified to see them soften as appreciation and relief shown in them. As angry as she was with me, she still valued my opinion above anyone else's, even her own.
Alice's POV:
I lay wrapped securely in Jasper's arms, my head resting on his chest, and for the first time in months I started to feel whole again. Not completely whole, but it was as though a large part of me were suddenly put back together. I hadn't realized how badly I had missed my husband until I saw him walk through our broken doorway.
We really hadn't done much talking since he entered the room. We spent more time catching up by soaking in each other's presence and reacquainting ourselves with each other's bodies. I took in a deep breath, inhaling the unique scent of my husband.
"Mmm," Jasper sighed contentedly as he buried his head in my hair. "I've missed ya my southern belle," he stated softly, and I tightened my hold on him, sending out all my love.
"I missed you too," I replied.
"You doin' alright?" he then asked, separating himself enough from me so that he could look me in the face.
"I'm better than I was," I replied honestly, giving him a small smile. He stared back at me with concern, gently caressing the side of my face with the knuckles of his right hand.
"I heard you got acquainted with Papa's leather demon," he remarked much too casually, and I didn't have to be an empath to notice the sudden anger he was feeling. Oh Jasper, I thought sorrowfully, when are you going to learn to curve your over protectiveness? When are you going to learn that our parents will never harm me?
"Yes, I did, and I deserved every bit of it," I informed him firmly, poking my finger into his muscular chest. "And I am not pleased with how you treated Mom and Dad, Major. I more than earned my punishment, and I am more than fine. You know they'd never hurt me, so why do you always have to lose your temper, Jazzy?"
He stiffened, frowning stubbornly as he weakly attempted to defend himself. "I was standin' up for ya, Ali. I know you've been stressed, so I thought"—
I sighed dramatically as I rolled my eyes. "So you thought you'd scream at mom and try to threaten Dad? You thought you knew better than them? You thought they'd hurt me?!" I questioned, fighting down my growing irritability. I loved Jasper with all my heart, and I loved how protective he was of me, but I hated that after all these years he didn't seem to trust our parents.
"It ain't like that darlin'," he tried to refute, "I just"—
"You just what?" I interjected sharply, attempting to break away from him.
"No, please don't leave, I'm sorry," he stated quickly, tightening his arms so that I couldn't get away. "I'm sorry Alice, please forgive me."
"What exactly are you apologizing for?" I questioned coolly.
"For everythin," he sighed, looking at me with sorrowful, apologetic eyes. "Sorry for bein' such a horrible husband, for not bein' able to help ya deal with your past; and I'm sorry about blowin' up with Mom and Dad."
I just sighed, unable to stay angry with him, especially with how sad and dejected he was looking. He looked at me with doleful eyes and my heart melted.
"Oh Jazzy, it's fine, I'm not angry with you," I stated, nuzzling my face against his, letting him feel my love for him.
"I have no right to be angry with you anyway," I told him, my emotions turning guilty. "I've shut you out when all you wanted to do was help me. I didn't trust you with the information I found, and there's no excuse for that."
"Don't you worry about that, baby doll. Don't you worry about that at all," he responded, giving me a handsome smile. "These past few months have been the hardest of my life, for both of us, but none of that matters now. All that matters is that we're together, that we're talkin', and that we have each other's trust…right?"
"Of course Jasper," I replied wholeheartedly, wanting as much as he did for our relationship to go back to what it was, or better than what it was.
"I've been a fool," I muttered, burying my head in the crook of his neck, and he shushed me as he caressed the back of my head.
"No ya haven't, you've just been confused," he responded. "Every single one of us have had life times to deal with our pasts, but you found out about your entire human life in the span of a few hours, and it was a horrible past, at least from the little that I heard. You wanting some time to process all this is normal. You having trouble digesting or understanding what happened is also normal, but you don't have ta deal with all this on your own. I will always be there for ya, and so will Dad and Mom."
"I thought ya didn't trust our parents with me," I couldn't help but say snidely, and he immediately turned abashed.
"It's not like that," he said, "I do trust them."
"It doesn't seem like it," I commented, giving him a pointed look.
He groaned, burying his head in my hair before saying, "I trust them to take care of you. They're great parents, I love them to death and I know you do too, but…I just…I mean when they're punishin' you I just feel so darn protective and I can't help it. I can't stand to see them scold you or, god forbid, spank you. My venom just boils at the thought, and I just can't help myself."
"You trust them when they're punishing you," I remarked, but he just sighed, saying in a nearly dismissive manner, "It ain't the same. I'm a guy and I can handle"—
"Oh my god, Jasper, you better not be trying to argue that because you are a man that you can handle more than I can!" I snapped heatedly, pulling away and standing up. He refused to let me get far though as he grabbed hold of my hand. He looked upset with himself as he shook his head.
"That's not what I'm sayin' at all," he protested, running a hand through his blonde curls in frustration.
"You don't seem to have this problem when it's Rosalie being spanked," I argued, giving him a mild glare.
"Rosalie ain't my mate!" he declared loudly, "You are! It's my duty to protect you"—
"But not from our parents!" I shouted, interrupting him for the umpteenth time. "Jasper, both Mom and Dad have spanked me numerous times and have I ever given you any indication that I was abused?"
"No, but Alice, please I'm sorry, I don't know what to say and I don't want to fight with you," he said, standing up and taking both my hands in his. "Please Alice, forgive me."
"I'm not the one you should be asking for forgiveness," I replied, but my gaze and tone had softened as I squeezed his hands.
"I already have, but I will again," he responded earnestly, and I pecked him on the lips before sympathetically saying, "The amount of times you've done this, Dad is going to make sure you don't sit down for a month."
He gave a frown before shaking his head. "Actually, Papa said he wasn't goin' to give me a lickin' cuz it wouldn't work." My eyes widened in surprise, not having seen this outcome. It seemed my husband's future had changed.
"I-I can't understand why he'd say that," Jasper confessed, looking quite woebegone. I looked at him in concern as he recounted what happened earlier, how he'd accused our father of not caring, and how he thought he was being banished.
"Daddy would never in a million years kick you out, no matter what you did, honey," I spoke softly, wrapping my arms around his neck. My poor baby, I thought sadly, my heart aching fiercely at the fear he must have felt.
"I know," he responded in embarrassment. "He told me that too, but I just can't understand that if he's not gonna spank me, then what is he gonna do? I messed up real bad, Alice, so what'd be a worse punishment than a thrashin' if not banishment?"
I have no idea, I couldn't help but think, but I didn't tell him that. "Oh, don't worry so much," I stated, giving him an encouraging smile. "It'll all be just fine. It always is."
"I guess," he mumbled, giving me a wider grin as his love for me wrapped around me like a warm embrace. I smiled in return before deciding to search my husband's future. I wanted to know what punishment awaited him. It concerned me as well that Dad didn't want to spank him for his temper, but…oh wow, now that's interesting.
"What is it?" Jasper questioned, no doubt feeling my sudden shock. "What did you see? My punishment?"
"Uh, well kinda," I responded slowly, wondering if I should warn him. I couldn't believe that Mom was going to be taking over Jasper's spanking. I searched his future a little more to see how he would react, and grimaced at the attitude he would display. He was not going to make this easy for our mother. But why was she the one punishing him? Why wasn't Dad?
"Hey, what is it? What's my punishment going to be?" Jasper pressed, his concern mounting.
"You're getting a spanking," I informed him sadly, deciding to withhold who would be administering the punishment.
My husband tensed, unable to hide the wave of anxiety that flowed through him before his brow furrowed in confusion. "But I thought Dad wasn't goin'"—
"He changed his mind," I explained faintly, beginning to grow distressed with how upset vision Jasper was with having Mom be the one to punish him. Ohhh, why couldn't Dad do it? I tightened my grip on Jasper, suddenly feeling quite protective over my love.
"Hey, hey darlin', I'll be alright," he soothed, giving me a smile. "Nuthin' I haven't experienced before."
We'll see, I thought glumly, wondering if there was some way to convince Dad to punish Jasper, or maybe if I refused to leave then they wouldn't—okay, that was a dumb idea, but I had to do something…and I had better come up with it quickly.
I tensed when I received another vision, this one of Mom and Dad headed here. Jasper pulled me closer, kissing the top of my head as he sent me soothing waves.
Oh Jazzy, I thought sadly, here you are comforting me when it is I who should be comforting you.
"You sure you're alright?" he questioned in renewed concern. "You real sore?"
I gave a light chuckle, staring up into his dark amber eyes. "It'll be a loooonngg time before I can sit down comfortably," I admitted, rubbing my aching bottom.
"I'm so sorry," he murmured, and I just rolled my eyes.
"I brought this on myself," I responded in exasperation.
We could hear our parents coming up onto the porch now when Jasper finally asked me, "What happened today, Ali? What did ya do to earn Papa's belt? Mama mentioned ya got into a fight with some gals at school," he remarked, his expression a good bit perplexed.
I let out another laugh, but this time there was no real humor in it. "I'll tell you about it later," I said, both of us hearing as our parents approached our house.
I felt another bout of anxiety flow through my husband before he quickly squashed it. He gave me one last reassuring grin before straightening up and putting on a serious face. His gaze turned towards our doorway, and I reluctantly turned as well to see both our parents standing there.
"Jasper, Alice, how are you both?" Mom asked, giving us a kind smile. Dad was leaning casually against the doorway, his face looking quite weary. His eyes though were very alert as they roved over both Jasper and me.
"We're alright," I answered my mother, although my eyes were locked on my father's. He noticed my gaze and gave me a barely imperceptible eye raise. A quick flash of a vision showed me what he wanted to know.
"How will Jasper handle his punishment?"
I gave a minute frown and narrowed my eyes slightly to communicate my unhappiness with what was going to happen.
He studied my expression, his own eyes narrowing slightly before his eyes flicked over towards Jasper. A quick check of my visions showed nothing changed, and I bristled.
"Son, I take it Alice has shared with you your upcoming punishment?" he questioned, and Jasper nodded. "Yes sir, I'm to receive a lickin'."
Dad stared at him before flicking his eyes over to me, no doubt realizing I hadn't told my husband who would be spanking him.
"Very well," Dad continued, "I need you to head to my study." Jasper gave an obedient nod as he once more responded, "Yes sir."
"No," I burst out, grabbing a hold of Jasper's arm as I stared at both my parents. "Wait, just…I mean…," I trailed off, uncertain of what to say.
Jasper turned to give me a pleading look to not interfere while Mom gave me a sharp look. I was readying the defense of my mate when Dad simply called out, "Alice" in a deep voice, and I immediately flinched, my eyes flashing straight to my father's. His face was calm, nearly bored as he stared back because he knew full well I wasn't going to challenge him. I looked down to the floor as I released my hold from my husband.
Jasper had understood what had happened, and he sent me a loving, appreciative wave with his gift, gave another nod to our parents and walked out.
"He's not going to like this," I hissed quietly the second he was out of hearing range, and Mom sighed before replying, "It's punishment, Alice, he's not meant to like it."
"I know that," I snapped back, finding it difficult to remain quiet enough for Jasper not to hear, "but why do you have to do it? Why can't Dad?"
"Your mother has as much of a right to punish you children as I do, Alice, so just drop it and let's go for a hunt," Dad said before motioning for me to walk out of my room. I felt tears of frustration prick my eyes as I glanced at my mother. I wanted to know her thoughts and why she was doing this.
"You can't do this. You know this will upset him so much worse than if Dad does it, so why?" I pressed, wincing when my father took two steps towards me. I didn't need to use my visions to know that he was in no mood for any more attitude from me, so I subconsciously took a step back, covering my extremely sore backside. Before he could reach me though, Mom stopped him, her hand slapping hard against his chest. His eyes snapped to hers and they stared each other down for several tense seconds before he closed his eyes, letting out a harsh sigh as he walked back towards the hallway. He placed a hand on the top of the doorway, leaning against it and looking down at the floor. Seeing him like this I no longer needed to know why Mom would be the one spanking Jasper.
I looked back at Mom and gave her a nod of understanding along with a quiet apology. My dad was suffering. I knew he hated punishing us, and that he hated punishing us girls even more. Him whipping me hadn't only worn on me but on him as well. Add that to Jasper's temper tantrum and his hurtful words, and I knew why Mom decided to step up.
She smiled at me before walking up and cupping my cheeks. Kissing the brow of my head she then looked me in the face and I received a vision of her saying, "Please take your father hunting, and help him, because right now I cannot."
I responded with a weak smile and a nod before walking towards Dad. It seemed my mother was still too upset to offer my father the comfort he needed. I would have to do the best I could to help him, although I knew full well that who he really needed was Mom. Until that moment though, we would lean on each other.
A/N: So Mama Cullen is going to be the one to take our dear soldier to task. As Alice has seen, he's not going to take this very well, but Esme is more than prepared. As for our other two Cullens, as Alice believes, they will help each other as Alice finally confesses what she found out in Biloxi.