One True Pairing

Roy sighed in content as he read through a oneshot.

"Hey, watchya readin'." Keith greeted him, causing the fox to jump and fall over. "Uh, ok...?"

"Don't read it!" Reverse Psychology coming into affect, the scarred up redhead read the story anyways. Afterwards he glared at his brother.

"You were readin' a story about me, mah buddy Ellis, and that Nick fella all havin' a threesome..." The fox gulped.

"Yes, you three are my OTP, the one pairing I will defend and claim canon for as long as I live." Roy chuckled. "I sometimes call it an OT3..."

"I worry 'bout you sometimes..."

Art is smart

"Looky, a picture I drew of you in art class!" Roy held up a picture for Miss Briggs.

"You sat in on one of the art classes I modeled for?" Callie looked at the fox.

"The evidence is here!"

"What the hell is this?!" She stared at the drawing.

"It's a portrait."

"Of...?"

"You! Stupid, duh!" She deadpanned.

"This looks nothing like me..."

"Clearly it is!" He pointed at a stick figure wearing headphones and dancing.

"You see, here is your eyeball, see how it dances in the moonlight?" He then pointed at a city. "There is your face-mouth." Next was a strange creature. "And here, is your fatty boob of greatness."

"My boob is a dinosaur attacking the city?"

"No, it's a giant lizard with a Mohawk and a pair of tongs, like the ones you have in your drawer." Callie sighed.

"Those are thongs not tongs, and why is my boob saying 203?"

"Well, I figured that was your bra size..."

"And what about the rocket monster about to crash into a boat?" The fox smiled.

"Those, now those are the butt cheeks, see the little man on the boat says, 'maybe we'll live' but upon collision of the two cheeks, survival is very doubtful."

Callie had a large drop of sweat creep down her head. "And what about the moth thing?"

"Not moth, that's your lady part of entry." The fox explained.

"Why is it saying half?"

"Well, it was an awkward pose, so I only saw half of it. Wonderful likeness if I do say so myself." Callie sighed.

"Whoever said there is no such thing as bad art, really needs a copy of this..."

"Oh thank you, I should really do some more self promotion." Having enough of this conversation, she crumbled up the drawing in her hand. Roy's eyes widened and he screamed for a good half hour.

Contact Troubles

Feral sighed as he looked through his phone, someone had changed all the contact names in it to random vulgar names. He decided to go through and find out who was who by text, the first of course was the contact name 'Shitface'.

Who is this?- Feral

Well, it's me Commander, Steele- Shitface

... Oh yeah, they didn't change this one...- Feral

Uh, what do you mean?- Shitface

Date fail

"Ok, open your eyes babe." The fox had taken Micheal to the top of the clock tower. He was planning to eat ice cream with him while looking out at the sunset. A great date in his mind. The lynx opened his eyes and nearly jumped out of his skin. He was staring right at the large drop not even one foot away from him. He jumped back into the arms of his lover.

"I hate heights!" He screamed.

"As much as I oddly find it arousing that your claws are digging into my skin, maybe you should let go and we can go somewhere else?" The lynx nodded and gladly walked out of the high clock tower.

Now at a park, Roy brought out some ice cream.

"Um... I'm not really into sweets." The fox cursed himself and tossed the ice cream away, hearing a scream, not sure if it was a kat or regular cat. "I'm sorry, I'm making things difficult."

"It's fine, I still love that I got to spend time with you." He held onto his paw, a smile still on his face.

"I'll make it up to you tonight." The fox felt the blood rush to his head and he blushed uncontrollably.

How much I love writing these.

And now a message to my dreamer. I did not laugh, I had the smile you loved so much. And the reason I didn't ask your assumed question was because I fully trust that every word you tell me is nothing but the truth. Now I have another question. I'm curious, what kind of collaboration story do you have in mind. Also... What would you do the second we meet? I already know what I would do...