A/N: Thank you again to Natchez for being my beta. Enjoy.
The next morning, Roy and Mike headed straight to Roy's house for breakfast. Mike felt bad because he hadn't been able to return Callie's call. They got called to a warehouse fire and by the time they got back it was just too late to call. He did manage to find a moment to let Roy know Callie had revenge on her mind. That was when Roy decided Mike needed to join him for breakfast.
Callie spent the night at Roy's at his daughter's request. Jenny loved spending time with Callie and pretending to be grown up. The end result was usually Jenny staying up an hour late and Callie fixing Jenny's hair in a french braid in the morning. Sometimes Callie would let Jenny help cook breakfast, too.
That was the scene greeting Roy and Mike: Callie braiding Jenny's hair. Jenny tried to get up to greet her dad, but Callie made her sit still.
"I'm almost done. You can wait another minute to hug your daddy." Callie put a hand on Jenny's shoulder to keep her seated.
"Does that mean I have to wait a minute, too?" Mike teased as he closed the front door behind him.
Callie hadn't looked up to see who walked in. She knew it would be Roy, but she wasn't expecting Mike. "You want your hair braided?" She looked up and smiled. "I don't know. Jenny, do you think his hair is long enough?"
"Boys don't wear braids! They wear ponytails!" Jenny explained as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Mike's hair isn't long enough for that."
"I guess not." Callie agreed as Roy and Mike both laughed at what Jenny said. "You'll just have to grow your hair longer, Mike."
"I don't think Cap will like that," Mike said with a chuckle. "He barely lets Johnny get away with that shaggy mess on his head." Mike sat on the sofa near Callie as Roy made his way to the kitchen. He watched as Callie finished up the braid and put a rubber band on the end. He could never make sense of how women braided their hair that way.
"All right, all done. Go and hug your daddy." Callie barely finished telling Jenny before she took off for the kitchen to find Roy. Chris was already in the kitchen saying good morning.
Mike took the opportunity to move next to Callie. "Good morning, angel." He leaned in and kissed her gently on the lips.
It was rare for them to see each other the morning after a shift and Callie decided to enjoy it. "Good morning, yourself." She leaned in for another kiss and hugged him. "Scruffy." She ran a hand along his unshaved cheek and jaw.
"Sorry. I was in a hurry to see you." Mike put his hand over hers and leaned his face into it.
"Likely story. I think you just hate shaving." Callie went for another kiss when Chris interrupted them.
"Gross! Dad, they're kissing again!" Chris quickly turned around and headed back toward the kitchen.
They both heard Roy laughing at his son. "You don't think it's gross when I kiss your mom."
"You have to kiss Mommy." It was clear where Chris stood on the issue. He didn't like kissing and he didn't care who knew he felt that way.
"Son, one day you're going to enjoy kissing girls." Roy walked out to the dining room table with his coffee. He looked over to see Mike and Callie getting up from the sofa and trying to hide their laughter.
"I will never, ever want to kiss a girl except Mommy!" Chris declared just as Joanne walked into the living room fresh from her shower.
Not one to miss an opportunity to embarrass her son, she walked over and kissed Chris on the cheek before sitting in Roy's lap and kissing her husband good morning.
"Gross!" Chris gave up and left the room. "Girls and kissing are gross!"
Joanne laughed as she moved to get up from her husband's lap, but he held on to her. "Where do you think you're going? I like girls and kissing."
"I know you do. That's how we ended up with two kids." Joanne reminded him with a twinkle in her eye. "I think I'd better help Callie before our daughter turns the kitchen into a disaster zone."
Roy gave in and let his wife up. He didn't want to be the one who had to clean up the kitchen. He looked up to see Mike coming from that direction with a cup of coffee and joined him at the table.
"Can I have part of the paper?" Mike knew when it was time to leave the kitchen to the ladies. Better to read the paper than get roped into kitchen clean-up with Roy.
"Sure thing." Roy kept the front page and pushed the rest across the table to allow Mike to choose a section.
Mike picked up the Sports section and pushed the rest of the paper back toward the middle of the table. It wasn't necessary since they were the only two in the room; it was habit from reading the paper at the station.
"What do you think Callie has in mind for Chet?" Mike asked, trying to get a gauge for just how evil Callie could be.
"That depends on how angry she still is." Roy remembered the long string of profanity Callie spouted that afternoon. "She used curse words that day I had no idea she knew - words I hadn't heard since I was in the Army. She was that angry."
Mike didn't know Callie cussed Chet out. Roy and Johnny had purposely left that part out to save Callie further embarrassment. "Just what words did she use?" Mike felt a strange need to know.
"I don't think I should repeat them with the wife and kids around." Roy didn't want a lecture from his wife about appropriate language to use around their children. "Let's just say any good mother would've washed her mouth out with soap. Twice."
Mike just stared, shocked, at Roy. He couldn't say anything as he tried to envision Callie using that kind of language. He had trouble imagining anything worse than the occasional "damn" or "hell" coming out of Callie's mouth. "Have you ever seen her that angry before?"
Roy hesitated as he thought about it. "Never. It was a sight to behold. That rumor about angry redheads being all fire is true, at least in Callie's case."
"I wonder what will be left of Chet by the time Callie's done with him?" Mike took a few sips of coffee as he turned the idea over in his mind.
"Hard to say." Roy shook his head. "I almost feel sorry for him. Almost."
"I'm not sure I feel sorry for him, either." Mike agreed. He turned his head toward the kitchen and took a deep breath. "Mmm...Bacon!"
Jenny walked out of the kitchen just then carrying flatware and napkins. Roy took them and asked his daughter to bring the plates out so he could help her set the table. Jenny was getting the hang of it, but still needed help making sure the utensils were actually near the plates and the napkins were folded neatly under the forks.
As soon as the table was set, Callie and Joanne brought out pancakes, bacon, butter and real maple syrup they heated up on the stove. Chris actually joined them at the table once he caught the scent of the food back in his bedroom. Everyone was quiet as they enjoyed the delicious food.
~~E!~~
Once the kitchen was cleaned up and the kids were outside playing, Mike asked Callie what sort of ideas for revenge she had come up since their conversation the previous day. She pulled out the list as the four adults gathered around the table.
Mike and Roy looked over the list. They agreed the hand in the water bowl trick and itching powder weren't practical when they saw both ideas were crossed out. They saw the next item on the list and wondered out loud who would write a love letter to Chet.
"From Big Red! Who else would write that man a love letter?" Callie went from Mike's angel to Chet's worst nightmare in 0.3 seconds flat. "Dearest Chet, I love the way you caress my body in the morning. No other man has ever taken the time to worship me the way you do. I can't stand that I only get to see you every third day. The time apart makes me miss your tender touch that much more. Until I see you again. Love, BR." Callie recited the "love letter" dramatically as she invented it on the fly.
No one could keep a straight face when she was finished, but Mike pulled Callie close to him. "Will you talk to me like that later?" He stared into her blue grey eyes, a hint of desire in his voice.
Callie blushed and Roy cleared his throat to remind them they weren't alone. He didn't want to know what went on between his cousin and his friend behind closed doors. Never mind that his wife had assured him it was still mostly innocent; he still couldn't stand the thought. Callie was like his baby sister and he felt the need to be her overprotective big brother.
Joanne called Roy's attention back to the list while Callie playfully smacked Mike's arm. "Michael!" She was thoroughly embarrassed.
Now Mike had an evil grin on his face. "I love it when you blush."
"No. You just love embarrassing me." She got up and moved her chair back where it belonged. "Can we get back to the list, please?" She was trying to stay focused on the task at hand.
Joanne saw short sheeting was next on the list and remembered to ask Roy about it. "Has anyone in the station done that?"
"Not that I know of." Roy replied, still not looking at Mike or Callie.
"I think that's one I can actually pull off. The only downside is that I won't be there to see the end result." Callie's determination to get revenge on Chet was returning. She would get Mike later, when they were alone, and no one would know but her.
They continued perusing the list. Mike laughed as he read the word "Velcro" out loud. "How is Velcro a practical joke?"
"Would you like to see?" Callie asked as Joanne got up from the table to get something.
Roy and Mike looked at each other quizzically and answered at the same time, "Yes!"
Callie got up and went to the sliding glass door. "Chris! Jenny! Come inside for a minute."
By the time both children were inside, Joanne had returned with what looked like a scrap of cloth.
Jenny smiled when she saw what was in her mother's hand. "Can I go first?"
Callie called her over and whispered something in her younger cousin's ear. Chris decided to sit at the table. He knew what was coming next and he didn't want to be a victim again.
Jenny walked back over to where her father was sitting and asked him to stand up while Joanne had moved the thing in her hand to her lap. Roy stood up despite the evil smirks that now played across the faces of his wife and cousin. Jenny and Chris were both trying hard not to laugh. Roy and Mike appeared to be the only two not in on whatever the joke was.
Jenny looked over at Callie and got an encouraging nod. "Daddy, pick me up," she said.
Roy looked over at Mike. Mike just shrugged his "I don't know," leaving Roy with little choice but to lean over and pick his daughter up. As he straightened up, it sounded as though his pants tore at the seam. He quickly set Jenny down as his wife, children and Callie were laughing so hard they were crying. He put his hands over his backside as Mike moved quickly to check how bad the damage was.
"There's nothing wrong?" Mike was confused as he looked at Roy's pants. They were fine. Nothing was torn or split.
Roy caught his reflection in the sliding glass door and realized nothing was wrong. "What?"
Chris, having been the first victim the prior night, was the first one to speak up. "Velcro."
"That sound was Velcro?" Roy was thinking about all the times he had strapped someone's leg into the traction splint or placed a cervical collar on them. He never once connected the sound of Velcro with the sound of splitting pants.
As he looked over at his wife, she pushed the scrap of material with the Velcro attached to it toward him. "Blame Callie. She's the one who realized the sounds were almost the same."
"But you were the one who came up with the idea of sewing something to make the prank easier to pull off." Callie retorted. She felt it had been a joint effort between her and Joanne.
"Chet's never going to know what hit him." Mike was pleased Chet wasn't going to get away with his misdirected prank. He definitely liked this side of Callie and hoped he would get to see more of it, as long as he wasn't on the receiving end.