Chapter 13 – The Power of Emotions

Swimming had always calmed her down, ever since she was a child. There was just something relaxing about the feel of the smooth water against her skin. It was almost sensual, she could touch it, smell it, taste it, see it and hear it. However, the taste left little to be desired and she preferred to not get a mouthful. There could be anything in the water: dead skin cells, someone's excretion, spit and who knew what else.

Unfortunately, today she couldn't swim. If she wore her swimsuit people would see the bruises and scars and they would talk. So instead she put on a t-shirt with a collar and shorts and practiced her ponn-ifla. This time, she put more power into her strikes to channel her anger. It wouldn't work as well as swimming, but it was a start.

Her classmates chatted and did their work outs, but she took no part in it, instead keeping complete and utter focus. She pretended that the Vulcan Hunters were coming for her, and instead of allowing them to kidnap her she kicked their asses into the middle of next week. She was so immersed in her imaginary fight that she didn't notice that most of the class had stopped their work outs and watched her. They had never seen her fight before and were surprised at her strength. It had everything to do with being Vulcan. Everything seemed to revolve around her being a Vulcan.

The bell blared sudden and loud. Zia froze in the middle of her technique and waited for the rest of the class to file out, their voices excited and raucous. They had big plans for the night. Study or parties, some of them going on dates. Her only option was study.

Now that she was alone, she allowed the anger to flow. Her strikes were not erratic, but they were powerful and showed evidence of pent-up frustration. She beat the punching bag again and again, moved in close and pounded as hard as she could. Tears flowed but she continued to hit the bag while she sobbed. This was pointless. Spock had rejected her, she had to face the aftermath on her own, and she was afraid to sleep. There was no chance that she would burden Tara with it all. Her roommate didn't deserve that.

"Zia."

She stopped and stood. No. It couldn't be. Gentle hands took hers and her lip wobbled.

"Zia, it is me."

She doubled over, weeping, her eyes squeezed shut. He fastened his arms around her and crushed her against him. She cried her heart out in his arms. Whether it was relief or misery, she didn't know.

o.O.o

McCoy checked their results for the second time. "You're both recoverin' swiftly. The injuries should heal before the end of the week, although somethin' needs to be done about Miss Abbott's brain. Is there anythin' else you need?"

"No," Spock replied. He stood. "Thank you for your assistance, Doctor."

"Anytime," McCoy shrugged. "I'll be seein' you two tomorrow."

Zia and Spock stood and left the room, their backs rigid. Outside, they paused.

"We will meet again tomorrow," Spock said quietly. He turned to leave, but Zia grabbed his arm.

"Don't leave, please," she begged.

He turned and faced her, his face impassive. "You require rest for classes."

"Well, no." She bit her lip. "The first time I slept without medication, the nightmares came back. It's… been five days. I haven't slept since."

He rested his palm on her cheek. "Would you like to come to my apartment for sustenance?"

"Okay."

He led her out of the Infirmary and to where his flitter was parked. They were heading to his apartment in minutes.

"So, what have you been doing since you got out of the Infirmary?"

"I have led the interrogations of the Vulcan Hunters and sentenced countless of them to life imprisonment. I have also investigated the use of Admiral Marcus' code in our abduction. It seemed that he was behind it and plotted to have us killed before he died. The Vulcan Hunters were founded and commanded by him, and they carried out the abduction despite his death. They have been monitoring us since your arrival at the Academy, it seems."

She drew a shaky breath. "I can't believe that an Admiral can be so xenophobic."

Spock's mouth twitched. "He never did approve of me." Another driver pulled in front of Spock and he braked and let off a string of Vulcan curses.

"I spoke to Spock Prime," Zia said.

"I am aware. He contacted me yesterday and shared the information with me. He encouraged me to reconnect with you, as in his universe he never experienced a true, meaningful bond."

Her heart skipped a beat, "The poor guy."

The vehicle stopped, and he climbed out and opened her door. They stepped into the turbolift and it took them to his apartment, where he typed in the code and the door opened. It was dark inside, but as soon as the lights were turned on she saw just how white and clean it was. He had an impeccable taste in style.

"So… what food do you have?"

He went to the food synthesiser and prepared the Terran meal of vegetable soup. A fragrant aroma filled the room and Zia sniffed it hopefully. Something thawed inside her, the barrier breaking. They ate together silently. After the meal was finished, Spock washed the dishes and Zia fought her churning stomach. It wouldn't do to concede to such emotions in such a precarious time. But it was such an intimate setting and it brought forth feelings she'd barely addressed before.

Spock settled beside her and turned his chair to face her. "I believe we have an issue to address."

Her breath quickened. "Yes?"

"I believe I must re-instigate our mind-meld and begin training you in the art of telepathy, to better assist you in the future."

Something else fluttered in her stomach. If they mind-melded he would know what she was feeling, and he might feel smothered. But… it was worth the risk, right? She knew he loved her, and she loved him, and there was darkness inside them that only happiness could vanquish.

"Okay, but I warn you, I'm a bit of an emotional wreck right now."

"Your concern is unfounded. I experience similar emotional reactions."

Spock carefully pressed his fingers to her psi-points. They closed their eyes and the barrier broke with such force that they physically winced. Light and colour burst into their minds. Pain and despair crashed down, and they quaked under the force of emotion.

He reined in his emotions and she fought to keep her own in check. Once past the initial burst, her mind found knowledge and wisdom. Not all of it was Spock's. Some of it was from Vulcan Elders who had taught him. All his knowledge of telepathy was transferred into her mind and absorbed into her memory. She drank in the knowledge eagerly and felt her own mind changed. She gathered her strength and new knowledge and ended the mind-meld gently.

"Spock, on Delta Organa you said that you loved me and needed me. You said that you didn't want to face the centuries without me. Is that true?"

"To lie would have been highly illogical."

"This time it's me saying it. I love you, and I need you right now." She stood and held out her hands. Uncertain, he took them and stood, but after tuning into her emotions his face cleared.

"Are you certain?" he asked.

"I do have one question," Zia whispered, almost embarrassed. "Have you been having monthly contraceptive hypos?"

Spock blinked. "Doctor McCoy has insisted upon it ever since our relationship began. To repeat my original question, are you certain?"

"Yes." She kissed his cheek. "I've never been so sure of anything before."

"I-"

She pressed a finger to his lips. 'Spock, I need this. I know you do too.'

He felt her desire. She felt his need and his deep hurt. This would save them both, and they each knew that. 'Yes.'

She backed into his bedroom, pulling him by his hands, and his face flushed green.

"I have never…"

"Neither, but I'm sure we can figure it out." Her heart raced and suddenly Spock was kissing her, on her lips, cheek, throat, anywhere he could reach. Electricity flowed through her body like nothing she'd ever experienced.

Somehow, she managed to pull his shirt off and came face-to-face with the mottled bruises that coated his torso. Her heart sunk. She gently pushed him against the side of the bed and guided him down onto the sheets. She carefully kissed each bruise and worked her way down his torso until Spock writhed beneath her.

He sat up and pulled her into his lap. She went without hesitation and shuddered at the wave of desire. Never had she wanted this so much. Spock pulled her head down, so his lips caressed her ear.

"Do I have your permission, Zia, to remove your clothes and pleasure you incessantly?" he whispered.

"Yes, Spock, oh god yes."