Author's Notes: The end of this chapter has been torturing me for weeks now, begging to be written. I only hope it comes across on paper anywhere close as to how I've seen it in my head. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Thanks again for all the wonderful reviews. They really make my day.
Disclaimer: The show Flashpoint and its characters were created by Mark Ellis and Stephanie Morgenstern and belong to them and the networks who air the episodes. Since the show has ended, our only way of getting new Flashpoint is through fan fiction. This story is my attempt to help fill the void, and the only profit I make is the warm fuzzy feeling reviews give me. Anything that does not come directly from the show is my own creation and should not be used without my permission.
Break Out
Chapter 10
Jules wasn't moving. Sam wasn't sure his heart was still beating. He knew he hadn't missed the shot. He was pretty sure the makeshift weapon had been far enough away from her neck that Dogland hadn't been able to use it on her in his dying moments. Had she hit her head on the ground when Dogland had collapsed on to her? Was something else wrong? He'd hoped when she went slack in her captor's arms, it had been a fake faint in order to loosen Dogland's grip on her, but what if it hadn't been so fake? What if she'd been hurt worse than he'd realized from looking at her and it had caused her to lose consciousness?
Protocol dictated that after taking a kill shot, the subject officers - in this case he and Sarge- couldn't speak to anyone else on the team. Jules called it "the cone of silence." Looking down through the scope, he could see Spike rushing over to check on Jules, but he couldn't ask him for an update. He could only sit there and hope that in Spike's own worry he didn't forget to give a status update over the radio so the rest of the team would know if she was okay.
He didn't know how long he had before officers arrived on the roof to take him to SIU for the post shooting interview. Until they arrived, however, he planned on keeping his eye on the scope with it trained right on Jules's prone body. Once Spike rolled Dogland's body off her leaving the dead body for Adam to cuff, Sam could get a better look at Jules. She wasn't unconscious. She twisted her body around so that she was mostly on her back. Her eyes were opened but the tears had increased and her face was a grayish pale.
"Jules, don't move. We've got an EMS team on the way. Hang on, I'm gonna remove the gag and the cuffs."
"Constable Braddock, we need you to come with us. You know the procedure."
Never let it be said that SIU wasn't Johnny-on-the-spot about doing their job. Sam took one last look at Jules through the scope before lowering the weapon. He relinquished the rifle to the uniformed officer and silently followed the SIU officer off the roof. He knew it was useless to protest going with them and knew it was just as useless pleading for just a few minutes to check on Jules personally. It wasn't that SIU was made up of heartless bastards who didn't care that the love of his life had been through a horribly traumatic experience. They were just doing their job, just as Sam had done when he pulled the trigger. He couldn't ask for special privileges just because he was dating Jules. He and Jules had worked too hard keeping their personal relationship separate from their professional one to call foul the first time the two came into conflict. As much as he wanted to check on Jules, pull her into his arms and hold her until all the fear and worry of the day was washed away, he would follow protocol. After all, the sooner he got the interview out of the way, the sooner he could be at Jules's side where no one would be able to separate them.
"Let's get this over with."
- FP - FP - FP -
There was no way in hell Jules was going to just stand there and let anyone else manhandle her today. Well, so she wasn't exactly standing since her feet were bound and Dog was holding her so that the feet barely dragged the ground. She still wasn't going to do nothing and allow Dog to hurt or humiliate her in front of her team or Team Four.
Silently she screamed at Ed and Sam to take the damn shot already. Didn't they realize Dog wasn't going to give up just because it seemed like his plan had failed? There would be no negotiating him down. There was only one way to end this and she was past ready for it to be ended. The rational part of her knew that the weapon at her neck was probably what was stopping them. She'd spent her fair share of time in a Sierra position to know how difficult the shot was when a hostage was being threatened with a weapon.
Perhaps she could help make things easier for them. She let her body go limp, pretending to pass out. She knew the sudden shift in her weight would throw Dog off. She just hoped she could stifle the wracking coughs that had started from the moment the CS gas filled the area. Sure enough, the minute she went dead in his arms, she felt the shiv leave its threatening position. A split second later, she felt the jerk of his body that said a bullet had met its mark. They both went down.
Jules was pinned beneath Dog's dead body. Somehow she managed to keep the majority of both his and her own weight off the leg where the shrapnel was embedded. It didn't fully prevent the pain from shooting in all directions but it did keep the pieces of metal sticking her thigh from completely burying themselves into her skin.
The gauze gag swallowed her whimpers of pain. She wanted to be strong, pretend that her body wasn't wracked with horrific waves of intense agony. It was over; Dog was dead, the others had been apprehended, and the imprisoned guards freed. No, she argued with herself. The danger had passed but things were far from over. The pain she was feeling was proof of that.
Dog's weight was suddenly lifted off her. As soon as she could move, she rolled over, desperate to alleviate all the pressure on her thigh. Almost immediately, familiar hands, but not the hands she longed for, were touching her shoulder. Her ears were still ringing from the flash grenade so she couldn't quite make out everything Spike said to her.
"…Jules…team…cuffs…"
Something cold and metal slipped between her cheek and the gauze holding the gag in place. Though she trusted Spike completely, she couldn't help but flinch at the cold touch of metal against her cheek. Logically she knew he was cutting the gauze that was holding the gag in place. She desperately wanted to get rid of the gag and the cuffs binding her but she couldn't shake the memory of Dog's shiv threatening her. She whimpered slightly, glad that the gag muffled the sound.
What was wrong with her? She couldn't remember any other time she'd ever whimpered. She wasn't the whimpering type. She certainly didn't want Spike or anyone else on the team to see her being weak. Yeah, what she'd experienced at the hands of the inmates had been horrifying and painful, but she was stronger than anything she'd endured.
The gauze was cut away and almost immediately Jules used her tongue to help push out the roll of gauze that Bear had shoved into her mouth. Her coughing increased with its release, partly from the CS gas and partly from the dryness the gag had left in her mouth. Spike squeezed her arm slightly as he waited for the coughing to subside. He said something to her but she didn't even try to decipher what he was saying.
Where was Sam? Why wasn't he the one kneeling beside her, cutting away the ties that held her fast? Even if he'd been on the roof in Sierra position, she knew it wouldn't have taken him any time once the danger had been neutralized for him to race down to check on her. Wild horses wouldn't keep him away. Unless…
"S'ike?" Her mouth was too dry for her to properly form even his name between coughs. "Sam?" This time her coughs ended in a groan as the movement hurt her bruised ribs.
"Take…easy. Where…medics?" Ed's concerned face hovered over her.
Jules's stomach dropped. If Ed was here, then that meant that the shot that killed Dog and ended her nightmare had come from Sam. It made sense; only SIU taking Sam in for questioning following a post incident shooting would explain why he wasn't with her. What kind of grief would SIU give him for making that shot? Would they realize that if he hadn't killed Dog, the inmate would have killed her? After he completely humiliated her in front of her whole team and Team Four, that is. Or would SIU hold their relationship against him? Would they accuse him of being blinded by his feelings for her when it came to ending the situation?
Two more passes of Spike's knife and her hands and feet were once more free. She tried to sit up; she had to make sure SIU knew that Sam didn't have a choice; the only way of stopping Dog was through death. Immediately two pairs of hands gently eased her back down.
"Jeez, Jules, your leg." The ringing in her ears had subsided enough that she could make out Ed's dismay. Was that pity in his voice? She didn't want his or anyone else's pity. She couldn't take it, especially not after everything else that had happened.
A couple of medics knelt beside her. Jules didn't recognize either of them and that made her strangely glad. Despite the fact that she'd spent so much time surrounded by men intent on hurting her, she didn't mind that these strange men would be the ones taking care of her. That is until once again the cold of metal pressed close to her skin, this time at her ankle as the medic used his scissors to start cutting her pants leg to expose the wound on her leg. Each cut caused a slight movement to the shrapnel in her leg, sending wave upon wave of intense pain coursing through her. After everything else that had happened, it was just one thing too much.
"No, stop." Her voice sounded stronger than it felt but she hated the quake of fear she could hear in it. "Don't touch me."
"Yeah, okay." Ed assured her, his voice soft and calm. Jules hated the placating tone she could hear in just those two words. She hated the pity she heard in his voice and saw in his eyes. She was pretty sure she wasn't just seeing and hearing things due to any lingering effects of the flash grenade.
"Stop." Jules repeated. She meant stop feeling sorry for her but couldn't finish the thought.
The medic who'd been trying to cut her pants legs held up his hands to show that he had stopped what he was doing at her first protest. "We won't do anything you don't want us to. We do need to get you moved to the stretcher though."
"I can do it myself." Hadn't she managed to sit up not once but twice while her hands and feet were bound? Doing the same now should be a piece of cake now that the cuffs had been removed.
The medic started to protest but Ed stopped him. Jules was grateful for his intervention even if she did hate the sympathetic look on his face as he did so. She found, though, as she tried to use her hands to leverage herself up that they were almost as useless as they'd been when the cuffs were biting into her skin. Her hands had gone almost completely numb from being confined. She ignored everything, including the almost desperate need to help her she could see in Spike's expression, and finally maneuvered herself onto the stretcher.
The move from the ground to the stretcher left her breathless and once again coughing violently. The medic knelt beside the stretcher again, a worried expression on his face. "Constable Callaghan, I'd like to put this oxygen mask on your face. I think the O2 will help you breathe a little easier. Can I?"
She nodded ever so slightly, not having the energy to do much more including argue any more. The mask was slipped over her mouth and nose and the strap gently fit over her head near her ears. She forced herself to breathe normally even though her lungs were begging for the pure oxygen. She closed her watery eyes as the medic fastened the seatbelts to the stretcher and then pulled a blanket over her.
A familiar hand patted her shoulder awkwardly. "Jules, do what they tell you. We'll meet you at the hospital."
Again, Jules only gave a brief nod of acknowledgement at Ed's promise. As the stretcher started to move, she allowed the movement to lull her to sleep. Maybe, if she slept hard enough and long enough, when she woke up, Sam would be there.
- FP - FP - FP -
They'd taken his uniform and allowed him to change into a new set of clothes. An SIU officer who looked like he wouldn't last a minute in any of the physical fitness requirements of SRU had advised him of his rights. Now he was just sitting at a table opposite the officer waiting on the union attorney to arrive so he could be questioned.
He wanted to stand up, pace, yell, hit something, anything to release the pent up frustration at being sequestered like this when he really wanted to check on Jules. He'd already told the officer he was willing to waive the right to having counsel present, anything to speed things up, but his request had gone unheeded. So he continued to sit there, staring at his cell phone, wondering if Ed would break the "cone of silence" if something was seriously wrong with Jules.
The door opened and Sam looked up, hoping it was the union lawyer. It wasn't. Jill Hastings, the SIU officer who had interviewed the entire team after the spree shooting at the museum awhile back - the one who had tried to railroad Sarge because of her mistaken belief he'd been the one responsible for the death of her former partner, stepped inside. She motioned the other SIU officer over and spoke softly. Sam used the momentary break to send a quick text to Ed's phone asking how Jules was. He was pretty sure Ed wouldn't answer without knowing if the interview was over but at least the team leader would know Sam was worried, and would in turn, hopefully, pass on the word to Jules.
The door opened and closed again. Sam glanced that way and saw that he was now alone in the room with Jill. She smiled at him as she joined him at the table. She glanced at the file as she sat down.
"Roberts tells me you're willing to waive counsel."
Sam nodded. "I didn't do anything wrong. I don't need a lawyer present; I just want to get this done."
"Okay, we can do that. Sign here saying you waived your rights." Jill handed over a sheet of paper and Sam quickly signed on the line. Jill took the paper back. "I hope you don't mind, but I'll be conducting your interview instead of Roberts. I was assigned to interview Sgt. Parker but somehow I didn't think that was appropriate given what happened last time. I don't harbor any ill will towards him, not now that I know what really happened to Brian, but it still seemed like a conflict of interest."
There was something about the way she said that last part that set off warning bells in Sam's head. That's what they were thinking for him, that his relationship with Jules created a conflict of interest. His jaw rocked slightly but he tried to hide his growing anger. Instead he decided it was probably better to jump straight to the elephant in the room. "You think me taking that shot today was a conflict of interest."
There was no doubt that he was making a statement not asking a question. Jill eyed him carefully. "You don't? The woman you are in a relationship with is being held by inmates threatening to escape their prison. You make the shot that takes out the leader and the man threatening not only to kill her with a makeshift knife but is also making sexual advances toward her. You don't see that as a conflict of interest?"
Sam shook his head. "I see it as doing my job."
"A job perhaps someone else could have and should have done." Her tone was not accusatory; they could have just as easily been discussing the weather. He remembered her casualness from the last interview she'd conducted. It was a bit disarming and probably why she was so good at her job.
"Who? We have three snipers on the team. Jules was being held hostage; Ed didn't have a good vantage point to make the shot without risking Jules's life. I'm the only one who could have made the shot."
"Team Four was there. They have snipers, yet they were all on the ground level helping with the take down there."
"Team Four was there providing support. Team One was still in charge of the call. Yeah, they have snipers and they're damn good but they don't have the experience working with Sarge the way Ed, Jules and I have. Calls like this one need split second reactions and that's not a time to have to rely on someone for the first time."
"A teammate was in trouble, perhaps it was a conflict of interest that Team One was in charge of the situation at all."
"Don't even give me that crap. It's not the first time we've remained primary on a call that affected one of our own. We're good at what we do and that's one of the reasons why we're one of the best. We don't let our emotions overrule our reason. Even back when Dr. Toth was brought in to determine whether Team One should be left intact, he allowed us to handle the call when Ed was shot. You aren't questioning the team's involvement in this call today; you're questioning mine."
Jill glanced at the transcript of the call as if reading it for the first time. Sam knew it was a ploy all the SIU officers used, knew they always fully read the transcript before coming in and used looking at it to make the subject officer nervous they were trying to catch something in particular. It wouldn't work on him. He knew he'd done everything by the book and taken the only action possible to prevent further tragedy. Then Jill looked back at him. "According to this, you were the one who insisted that Dogland shouldn't be taken alive."
Sam shook his head. "I was the one who pointed out that Dogland didn't want to be taken alive. He wanted out of that prison and he'd take his escape however he could get it, either by being allowed to leave through the front gate alive or through death. That's part of my job; looking at the big picture. Twenty-five to thirty inmates attempted to escape and we managed to thwart that attempt with only taking one life…"
"Two lives." Jill corrected. "The body of one of the inmates was discovered in the laundry room. Do you know what happened to him?"
"He was killed by one of the other inmates." Sam replied evenly. His blood still boiled as he remembered the way the man had touched Jules; his intentions had been clear that what Sam witnessed was only the start of what he had planned. Sam wouldn't feel a moment's regret about his death.
"If you witnessed what was happening, why didn't you report it? Or better yet, why didn't you intervene? Perhaps his death could have been prevented."
Sam shook his head. "At the time, I was alone outside the laundry room. If I'd gone in and tried to prevent his death, I would have risked the lives of the hostages." If he'd been unable to rush in and stop the bastard from hurting Jules, he sure as hell wouldn't have rushed in to protect the man from the one who was stopping him.
"Why did they kill him?" Jill asked softly. She was watching him carefully as if trying to gauge his reaction.
Sam looked back at her, his blue eyes betraying nothing. "Is this interview about what happened in the laundry room or my taking the kill shot?"
"If one led to the other then both. Did you see something that happened in that laundry room that made you more apt to want to kill Dogland?"
Sam sat back in his chair; even though every muscle in his body was tensed up, it didn't show in his posture. Eventually everything that had happened in that laundry room would come out, but there was no way in hell that he'd be the one to reveal what had happened to Jules before she was ready to talk about it. "During the time I was watching, I didn't see Dogland do anything. One of the other inmates killed the man you are talking about. Yeah, he was killed because of his actions towards Jules but it had nothing to do with my actions on the roof."
"You didn't step in when the guy who was hurting Jules was killed and then you took the life of another man who was in the process of hurting her. One could see a pattern developing."
Sam narrowed his eyes. "What are you saying?"
"'Some people are helpless and need protecting.'" Jill's eyes were unwavering.
Sam recognized her words. Words he'd said to her during the last interview she did with him and he'd told the story of how his sister had been killed. He bristled at having his words thrown back at him, especially in this way where it wasn't even the same. He shook his head. "Yeah, some people are helpless and need protecting, but not Jules. You've interviewed her before; do you think helpless and in need of protection are appropriate descriptions of her? She might have been bound hand and foot; she might have been their captive; she might have had a homemade knife held at her throat but she wasn't helpless. She didn't need protecting, not in that sense. She's one of those that does the protecting. Even when she's in trouble, Jules is far from helpless. How do you think I managed to make that shot? Jules managed to put herself in a situation where she wasn't in direct threat from the knife. Because of that, I was able to take the shot and end the situation without her or any of the other hostages getting hurt any worse than they'd already been hurt." He took several deep calming breaths and then looked back at Jill. "Can I ask you a question?"
Jill nodded but didn't say anything.
"If it was anyone else sitting here, if anyone else either on Team One or Team Four had taken that shot or if he'd been holding one of the guards instead of Jules, would this interview be anything more than just a formality?"
"No, probably not." Jill admitted softly.
"Then it shouldn't be for me either. I did my job and my actions today would have been the same regardless of who was in danger. When we're on shift, Jules and I put the job before our feelings. We've already proven that we can be teammates and lovers; it's the reason why we were allowed to remain on the same team. It's not fair that the only time talk about our relationship comes out is because speculation makes good fodder in some stupid report. Now you just admitted that anyone else would have already been cleared and released, so are you really going to continue to sit there and make a big deal out of this or are you going to treat me the same way you would treat anyone else? So instead of going on and on about conflict of interests, how about getting my side of what happened and basing your report on the facts instead of supposition."
After just the briefest hesitation, Jill nodded. "Okay. How about you do just that."
- FP - FP - FP -
It was still another forty-five minutes before Sam was allowed to leave the interview room. Forty-five minutes of telling and then retelling everything that had happened that led to him taking the Scorpio shot. But at least it had been forty-five minutes of not being questioned about his relationship with Jules. Jill hadn't given him a definite idea of what her ruling would be, but Sam was fairly certain that he would - as he should be - cleared of any wrong doing.
He really didn't care at that point what the decision would be; there would be time for worrying about the outcome later. Right now, all he cared about was getting to the hospital and checking on Jules. Nothing was going to stop him.
As soon as he stepped out into the hallway, Greg stood up. He was still in the standard change of clothes he'd been given after having to give up his uniform, just as Sam was. He looked as tired as Sam felt but offered a wan smile as Sam walked over to him.
"You okay?"
Sam shrugged. "I don't know. Have you heard anything about Jules?"
Greg nodded. "I called Eddie as soon as I was cleared to leave. She's still in the ER and Eddie thinks they'll probably want to keep her overnight. Before you ask, I don't know how bad her injuries are. Ed didn't say much, probably because he was right there in the room with her. You know how Jules hates for us to fuss over her. Let's head upstairs, change, and then get to the hospital."
The last thing Sam wanted was more delays. "I don't have to change; I'm fine like this. Let's just go. I feel like we've wasted enough time as it is. I just want to see Jules."
"I'm sure she wants to see you just as much." Greg assured him. "But I also think she'd appreciate a change of clothes. You know between the medics and the ER personnel, they didn't leave her much of her uniform. You also know how much Jules hates hospital gowns. I think we've both listened to her tirades about how whoever designed them should be forced to wear one 24/7 so many times we could quote her. Besides, you know as soon as you get there, you aren't going to want to leave again, not until she's able to leave as well. Wouldn't you be more comfortable in regular clothes?"
As much as he didn't want to wait, Sam had to recognize the wisdom in Greg's suggestion. The two men made their way to the elevator and rode up to the SRU floor. Sam grabbed Jules's bag from her locker and then quickly changed into the jeans and shirt he'd worn to work that morning. He sat down on the bench as he waited for Greg to finish.
"What aren't you telling me?" Sam asked as Greg buttoned his shirt.
The older man sighed and sat down on the bench next to Sam. "I don't know anything more than I've told you. But there was something in Ed's voice; he was trying to hide it, not from me I don't think but from Jules, but I could hear it. He's worried. I don't think it's because of her injuries. Sam, there's no easy way to tell you this, but Warden Jenkins was able to tell us about the inmates involved. One of the men, the one that was killed in the laundry room, was convicted of several rapes. I think we have to consider the possibility…"
"You think I haven't considered it?" Sam interrupted. He still wasn't ready to confess to the degradation he'd been forced to watch Jules suffer without acting. "I don't think she was raped. And it's not just because I can't stand to think of her being hurt that way. Her uniform shirt looked ripped yeah, but the rest of her clothes were intact. I'm trusting that as a sign that nothing they did went that far. I'm going to continue to trust that until I have a good reason to think otherwise."
Greg nodded, but it was obvious he wanted to say more. "Okay then, you ready?"
It took everything in Sam not to retort that he'd been ready before they'd ever come upstairs. Instead he nodded. Once in the parking lot, the question as to what vehicle to take came into play. Sarge was pretty sure that Sam didn't need to be behind the wheel of a vehicle. He suggested that he drive them in the Jeep. That way, Sam and Jules would have a way home from the hospital later. Sarge knew he could catch a ride back with the rest of the team.
The ride to the hospital seemed to take forever. Time when Sam had nothing to do but worry about Jules. The fact that Ed was worried only made his own worry worse. They were all bad about pushing their own emotions below the surface, but Ed was probably the most skilled at it. That Greg had been able to pick up on Ed's worry even without the other man saying anything about it, it must be bad.
As soon as Greg pulled into a space in the parking garage, Sam had his seat belt off and was out of the Jeep, Jules's bag slung over his shoulder. He quickly out-distanced Greg as he practically ran to the Emergency Room entrance. He was heading to the desk to inquire where Jules was when he heard a familiar voice call his name. He looked in the direction of the waiting room and found Ed, Spike and Raf there. He frowned. He wasn't surprised that all three of them hadn't been allowed back with Jules at one time but why weren't any of them with her? How could they leave her alone after all she'd been through?
Almost on wooden legs Sam joined them. He bit back his accusatory questions and settled for the one he really needed an answer for. "Jules?"
"They took her for x-rays. The nurse was supposed to let us know when Jules was back in the cubicle." Spike explained. There was something in his tone though.
Sam frowned. "But?"
"They took her down an hour ago. I don't think it takes that long to shoot some pictures." Spike grumblingly explained.
Ed continued. "I think Jules asked the nurse not to call us back in. I got the feeling that our hovering was getting on her nerves. You know Jules, she's not going to admit that we were bothering her but her body language was saying it loud and clear. I think I even caught a look of relief cross her face when the orderlies came to get her."
Raf went to the coffee machine and inserted a couple of quarters. Once a cup had dropped and filled with hot black coffee, he picked it up and offered it to Sam. "Here, you look like you could use this."
What he could use was seeing Jules, but he accepted the coffee nonetheless. He took a sip and then grimaced. Definitely nowhere near a Tim Horton's excellence. He glanced back toward the nurse's desk. Ed noticed. "Go ask if you can see her. I'm betting she'd welcome having you back there. Before we got kicked out, she kept asking about you. As much as I think we might have been annoying her, I think she was more annoyed with SIU keeping you from being here and worried they were going to bust your chops because of your relationship with her."
Sam nodded and turned back to the desk. A nurse looked up at him and smiled. He asked about seeing Jules. The nurse's smile turned to a frown. "I'm sorry…"
Sam shook his head. "Just tell her Sam's here. If she doesn't want to see me, fine but I want her to know I'm here." Like hell it would be fine, but he at least would try to understand.
The nurse's features softened. "It's okay. She's already given the okay for you to go back. She's in cubicle 14E."
Sam thanked her and, after dropping the mostly full cup of coffee in the garbage, made his way back into the cubicle area. He watched the numbers outside each curtained area until he found the one the nurse had indicated was Jules's. He pulled the curtain back and stepped just inside. He stopped short of approaching the bed, getting a really good look at Jules.
She was lying in the bed with her eyes closed. A nasal cannula was feeding her oxygen through her nose and that would have worried him if he hadn't known that it was pretty standard after being hit with the CS gas. Her cheek was bruised and puffy. Her lower lip was split open and was also swollen. She looked like she'd gone twelve rounds with a heavy weight boxer. It hurt him to see her look so battered and that was just her face. He didn't know if he could handle seeing the rest of her injuries.
She opened her eyes at the sound of the curtain opening. When she saw him standing there, her eyes filled with tears and she raised the bed so that she was sitting up. He dropped her bad to the floor and took a single step closer. Whatever was holding him back seemed to leave him with that first step. He was at her side in an instant and then questioned what he should do. He wanted to crush her to him and never let her go but he didn't want to hurt her either.
He eased down on the bed beside her and reached out and pushed a strand of hair from her face. Before he could say anything, her hands reached up to cup the back of his head. She drew him toward her and her lips met his. A part of him knew he should protest; he knew the kiss had to be hurting her busted lip but protest was impossible even if he had seriously wanted to.
Long before that night outside the Royal York, he'd thought a lot about kissing Jules. He'd wondered what it would be like. Were her lips as soft, supple and as kissable as they appeared? Would she be demure and hesitant, willing to let him take the lead or would she kiss the way she did everything else, with everything in her and a sense of confidence that couldn't be ignored? He'd given so much thought to what it would be like that he'd been almost hesitant to actually kiss her for real. He'd been nervous that there was no way reality could even come close to his fantasies.
Turned out that he needn't have worried at all. His fantasies had paled in comparison to the perfection that that kiss had been. Like a drug, that first kiss had ignited in him an addiction that couldn't be satisfied. He'd had some sexual encounters with other women that were less satisfying than just kissing Jules could be. That first kiss had left him craving more and more, to the point he couldn't get enough.
He hadn't even realized the full extent of his addiction to her and her lips until the break up and his supply had been abruptly cut off. His withdrawal had been just as brutal as he imagined it would have been if his addiction had been an actual drug. It was so bad that he'd found himself fighting the urge some days at work from just pushing her gently against a wall or the side of one of the Suburbans and just kiss her senseless. Only his pride and the knowledge that Jules would knock him senseless if he did had kept him from giving in to the urge.
This kiss, however, was different from any kiss he'd ever experienced with Jules. There was a desperation in the way her lips pressed against his. Her tongue swept inside his mouth hungrily as if she were trying to draw breath out of him in order for her to be able to breathe properly. Her hands gripped the back of his head as if she were afraid if she didn't hold him tight enough he would just disappear.
He responded in kind. His arms wrapped around her and drew her firmly but gently closer to him as if to reassure her that he wasn't going anywhere. He met every stroke of her tongue with one of his own. Long after his body screamed in protest with the need to breathe, he continued to kiss her with the same hunger he'd sensed in her. Slowly, he felt the desperation seem to lessen ever so slightly at a time until he finally felt her body relax in his arms.
Only once the ferocity seemed to wear off and she practically melted against him as if her body was the consistency of a wet noodle, did he ease her back against the bed. Breathing hard, he pressed a feather-light kiss against the worst of her swollen, split lip. His hands framed her face as he pulled back just enough to be able to look into her eyes, pools of deep melted chocolate. He wasn't sure what it was that she was needing with the kiss but he hoped she'd gotten everything she needed and more.
"Better?" He asked gently.
She nodded, not able to voice in words exactly what had driven her just then. Sam smiled slightly and once more pulled her close to him. "Good."
Then his lips caressed hers once more. This time the kiss was less desperate but just as breathtaking. For the moment, it would be enough.