A/N: Remember, the year is 1997. Hence the dial-up ;)
Chapter 9
Aftermath
The group left the Bronze quietly and walked down the street for some distance; Xander and Willow were lost in their own thoughts while Buffy and Sam kept glancing at each other, then looking away.
The occasional attempt at conversation was met with halfhearted responses from the group.
"Fun time." Xander said. Cordy kissed me. Why? I kissed her back. Why?
"What? Oh. Yeah." Willow agreed. Who is he? I go to school with him? Who is he?
"Yeah." Buffy shivered, as a cool breeze stirred the air around her. She pulled her jacket closer to her body, glancing at Sam out of the corner of her eye.
"Uh-huh." Sam looked at Buffy and saw her looking at him. They both looked away.
A few minutes passed in silence.
"Good music." Willow commented. I asked him his name but he wouldn't say. Why wouldn't he say?
"Yep." Xander nodded. I didn't imagine it. She kissed me and I kissed her back. He felt both equal parts appalled and aroused. Why? He asked himself again.
"Always good music at the Bronze." Buffy added. Angel. God, Angel. I forgot about Angel. She looked at Sam and lost her train of thought…
"I've liked it so far." Sam commented. I wonder what she is thinking. She is probably thinking about Angel. He is her boyfriend, after all. Isn't he?
More silence.
"So- uh…- the blackout thing?" Sam began. No one looked at each other.
"Hmm?" Willow looked at her hands.
"Huh?" Xander looked at his feet.
"Uh – huh?" Buffy became fascinated with the process of fastening her jacket.
"They do that often there?" Sam inquired. Nothing can happen anyway. My month is up in a few days and we will be leaving.
"Sometimes." It was just like she had imagined. Thrilling. Sexy. Intimate. Willow thought. What did he mean when he told me, "Next time, you will have to find me."?
"A couple of times." Xander remembered how her fingers had tightened on his shoulders as the final notes of the song were being played. For one second, she seemed to pull him closer. Then she shoved him away. The lights came on and they had stared at each other, breathing hard.
"Yeah." The lights had come on and Buffy found she was unwilling to step out of his arms; Sam had seemed reluctant to step away as well.
They arrived at an intersection. With a murmured "Goodbye" they parted ways; Willow and Xander going left towards their subdivision, Buffy and Sam staying on the road.
Xander walked Willow to her house. The porch light was on and he waited on the sidewalk while she fished out her key and unlocked the front door. She waved at him as she went inside and flipped off the outside light.
Upstairs, in her room, she turned on her computer, grabbed her pajamas and went into her bathroom. After changing, she washed her face and brushed her teeth, taking comfort in the familiar routine as she replayed the evening.
The welcome screen was up. Rapidly, she entered in her password and then clicked on the icon to connect to the internet and the modem whistled and whined as it dialed into her connection.
She dreamed of a future when technology would advance to the point when her computer could connect to the internet faster. And wouldn't it be nice if the monitors weren't so bulky?
Knowing the modem would take at least a minute or two to connect, she busied herself with small tasks; she put her clothes into the dirty clothes basket and laid out tomorrow's outfit for school, changing her mind twice.
Glancing at her monitor, she saw she was connected and she turned off her bedroom light. Now the only light in her room came from her small desk lamp and the large computer monitor.
The stranger's words echoed in her mind.
You will have to find me, he had said.
"Challenge accepted." She grinned.
Fingers flying over the keys, Willow started by hacking into the school's records. First she opened the file containing all of the school ID's. She was confident, patient and methodical in her approach, a trait she had honed over the last year as she assisted Giles and Buffy with Helmouth research.
Before she went to bed, she knew his name, his class schedule, his grades (his GPA was higher than hers!) and his school email account. She sent him an anonymous and (almost) untraceable email that contained one word.
Tag.
"Now, you show me yours." She said out loud.
Willow went to sleep with a smile on her face. She dreamed of dancing under the twinkling stars in a pair of magical slippers with a spiky-haired prince.
Xander stood on the front porch, reluctant to go inside and fighting the same battle he fought every time he readied himself to go inside his house.
As he tensed and felt that familiar stirring within.
He inhaled slowly, through his nose - the faint odor of his father's favorite brand of cheap scotch and his mother's brand of box wine. He closed his eyes and turned his head to listen. Snores - coming from the upstairs master bedroom telling him his mom was asleep; canned laughter coming from a TV Land repeat episode, followed by his father's drunken laughter in the living room.
Xander considered his options.
If he wanted to avoid confrontation, he could simply walk around to the back yard and pull his sleeping bag from the shed; he could sleep outside and get up early to go inside and change for school.
Or, he could go inside.
Warily, he opened the front door and stepped inside.
Maybe Tony wouldn't hear him, he thought.
Immediately, the volume lowered on the TV and Xander heard the springs in the couch.
"That you Xander?" His father slurred.
Xander paused in mid-step on the stairs. His heart rate increased.
No. He groaned inwardly. No. No. Not now!
Xander heard his father walk into the foyer, giving a grunt as he walked into the wall.
Drunk off his ass, Xander thought disgustedly as he stared forward and tried not to turn around.
"You trying to sneak up the stairs…being a coward?" his father's voice rose belligerently.
Xander said nothing. Years of practice told him that at this point, anything he said would provoke Tony.
Tony advanced up the stairs.
No. Walk away Tony, just for the love of God walk away.
Tony stopped and Xander whipped around and grasped Tony's fist before it connected with his head. Eye's wide, Tony looked at Xander's face.
"I told you the last time Dad. You aren't allowed to use me as a punching bag anymore. This is your last warning. The next time, I hit back." Xander growled.
Tony lost his balance and began to fall backwards. With one blurred motion, Xander grabbed the front of Tony's stained wife-beater and held his father upright as he stared into his father's eyes.
One push and it will all be over. The gleeful voice whispered in his head.
Shut up! Xander ordered and the voice in his mind quelled. He pulled on his father's shirt, spun him around and eased him down until he was sitting.
"Go to bed, Dad." He said, wearily, then continued up the stairs to his room. He changed into a pair of shorts and went into the bathroom. He flipped on the lights, closed and locked the door as he leaned forward and looked into the mirror.
Impassively, he looked at his green, glowing eyes and felt equal parts of shame and pride.
Shame that there must be something inside of him that refused to completely let the Hyena go. It was his secret, one he hid from Buffy, Willow and Giles.
Pride because the Hyena part of him had allowed him to stand up to Tony - the day Xander had been possessed at the zoo was the last day Tony had hit him.
"Go away." He commanded his image firmly. For a moment, the eyes glowed brighter, and then his eyes went back to hazel. His heart rate slowed and Xander brushed his teeth.
Possessions are tricky things.
He thought about Cordelia and he knew he couldn't let the incident be repeated.
He added lust to his private list of Hyena triggers.
He slept soundly.
In his dreams, he walked unseen in the darkness, seamlessly shifting from human to hyena as he stalked his prey, a young lioness. As a hunter, he was skilled and took down his prey quickly. Shifting back to his human form, he picked up the dead lioness, hefted the dead animal around his shoulders and carried it back to his tribe. Their strongest Hunter, he was feared and respected, but always alone.
They called him Bouda.
Cordelia sat in her car. Her hands shook slightly and her breathing was ragged. She left the Bronze so fast; she didn't even bother to go back to her table and her friends. Had she fallen into some weird parallel universe where the Sam Winchester's of the world failed to kick start her libido, but Xander-fucking-Harris could have her heart rate go from zero to one-twenty in under six seconds?
What the hell were you thinking?
Thank God, no one had seen her moment of insanity. Yep, IN-SAN-I-TY. Cordy shifted into drive and drove home.
Never again, you hear me? Never again! She told herself firmly.
Xander Harris is dead wrong if he thinks he will ever get his ape-hands (omigod…his hands. Gripping her waist, sliding across her back. His hands felt so goo-) or his lips on her again. (His lips. On her lips. His tongue. Who in the hell taught him to kiss like that?).
She gritted her teeth.
"NO! None of that Cordy. He is nothing. You hear me, nothing!" she said out loud.
She arrived at the gates to her home and pressed a button on the dash. Silently, the massive gates sprung wide.
Cordy drove through the gates and drummed her fingers anxiously on the steering wheel as she waited for them to close.
Once she was in her room, Cordelia stripped down and took a quick shower. Afterwards, she wrapped a towel around her torso and leaned close to the mirror, giving her face a thorough inspection. She knew her mother's inspection in the morning would be just as critical.
If the Chase family had a motto, it could be summed up in one word.
Image.
Image was everything. Heaven help her if her mom happened to spot a pimple.
To the public, she was the much loved, spoiled only child who's every whim could be indulged. Her father was the consummate family man; her mom was the perfect hostess. In private, though, things were different. Her father came home long enough to change clothes before leaving to be with his mistress-du-jour, he only stayed if they were hosting a party or soiree.
Her mother occupied herself with society gossip and social intrigue, firing her current domestic lover when she became bored or redecorating.
Cordelia was pretty much ignored.
She could come and go as she pleased as long as family image was maintained. She was expected to make an appearance at every party, called him "Daddy" and her "Mummy". They, in turn, played the part of the proud parents and then she could make her escape.
If she thought she could get away with it, she would go to Hollywood after graduation and become an actress. She had been acting her whole life and thought she was damn good at it.
She would never do it, of course. Nope, no acting career for Cordelia Chase. She was expected to apply and attend a Top-Ten College. She knew she would get in, her best kept secret at school were her grades. She knew people thought she was dumb and a flake - they didn't know she was a straight-A student.
"Image is everything." She said into the mirror.
She brushed her teeth and returned to her room. She walked through the picture-perfect room (every teen girl's fantasy room, of course) and into her walk in closet. She changed into her favorite sleepwear. Nothing name brand here…she saved that stuff for sleepovers.
She turned on her bedside lamp and turned off the room light. She crawled into the bed and lay between the soft Egyptian cotton sheets.
She opened the drawer of her night table, pulling out the plain black journal. She chewed on the end of her pen for a moment.
Her one rule with her journal was simple. No pretending. Total honesty. But, she had a hard time putting her evening into words.
She didn't want to admit the truth. She couldn't. Finally, she decided to sum up her night with one simple question.
"Where in the hell did Xander Harris learn to kiss like that?"
She put her journal back into the drawer and switched off her lamp. She slept fitfully.
She dreamed that she walked into school and there were pictures of her and Xander kissing posted all over the school. Everywhere she turned people pointed at her and laughed, eyes sparling with malicious mischief as whispers spread through the school like wildfire.
As she dreamed, a trail of tears leaked from her closed eyes.
They continued forward in silence. Neither felt the need to talk. Soon enough, the red glow of the neon sign at the Sunnydale Inn came into their view. By mutual agreement, the pace of their steps slowed.
Buffy was the first to speak.
"So there is a dance next week…" she paused awkwardly, unsure how to proceed.
"Yeah. I saw the posters."
"Are you - have you asked anyone to go? Cordelia, perhaps?" Buffy tried not to look too anxious. Please say no. Please say no.
"Cordelia? No. Uhh..no." Sam shook his head. How did he explain what she saw earlier? Why did he feel the need to explain?
"Oh. I thought that…well, after tonight when you- and she-" Buffy flushed, grateful for the darkness.
"No. No. We realized it was a mistake almost right away." Sam smiled. There that explained it! A mistake.
"A mistake?" she started, doubtfully. "You both realized you made a mistake, so you both just started groping each other?"
Her voice rose up on the last few words and she winced. God, she sounded like a jealous shrew.
"She made me!" Sam said quickly. He flushed, grateful it was dark outside.
"She did? She made you grope her?" Disbelief colored her words. Sam cringed.
"Well uh, we uh kissed and then we both realized that we uh..." his voice trailed off. This is embarrassing.
Buffy looked at him. He closed his eyes and took a breath.
"Werealizedthatweweren'tthatintoit. Butsherealized…Iwasntturnedon."
Silence.
He opened his eyes. Out of the corner of his eye's he saw her shoulders shaking.
"Oh. Come on!" he said. As if it wasn't embarrassing enough.
Muffled laughter.
"Go on, let it out."
She finally let loose with a full bodied laugh. It sounded so good to his ears, he smiled. After a moment, he joined in.
"Seriously?" she asked him, gasping for air.
"Honest truth." Sam told her.
She sobered. "But you did get turned on."
"Nope." Sam shook his head.
"But when you fell on me, I felt-"
Silence.
"You mean..." She faltered.
"Yeah." The word came out as a long exhale.
"Oh."
Sam finally asked the question that had been on his mind all night.
"So- you and Angel? Are you guys...together? Is he...your boyfriend?"
Buffy thought hard. Was he? Many times, she had tried to talk to Angel about it. But he always brushed her off. "It's complicated, Buffy." She had never been on a date with him. She had introduced him to her mom once, but she had to lie about who he was.
"Sam, if you had a girlfriend, what kinds of things would you do with her?"
"Look, Buffy, it's okay if you don't want to answer the question."
"I do. I'm just trying to figure something out. Please? What would you do with her?"
"Normal stuff, I guess. Dates, spend time together, introduce her to my Dad and Dean when they were around, call her and other...stuff."
"We never did stuff like that. No dating. No "meet the parents", I mean not really."
Sam recalled seeing her and Angel kiss earlier that night. "But there was other...stuff."
"Kissing. Yes." Even though she knew he couldn't see her face, she looked away. This sounds so bad.
"So – you didn't date, he's not your boyfriend, you just hooked up?" He clarified.
"Yes, but there was no groping." The last word was said pointedly.
"When you kissed him, how was it?" Immediately, he regretted the question. Some things were better left unknown.
"It was nice."
"Nice?" He tried to muffle the laugh.
"Yes. Nice. Why?" she asked sharply when she heard his laugh, "What's wrong with nice?"
"Nothing. Nice is okay. Dull. Passionless. Chaste. "
"No, it's not. Nice is…nice." God, why did it suddenly sound so inadequate to her?
"Okay. Let me ask you this. When you were kissing him, what were you thinking about?"
Buffy thought for a moment.
"The usual stuff I guess. Patrolling. What I was going to wear to school."
They had reached the door of his motel room. Buffy turned to face him and, since all of the doors had lights above them, she had a clear view of his face.
"What do you think about?" The question came out breathlessly.
His eyes searched her face and she felt something inside her gut clench in response. Apprehensively, she took a step backwards, right into the wall. He took a step toward her.
"Not hunting." He said seriously. He put a hand against the wall, just above her shoulder. His eyes moved to her lips.
Nervously, she licked them.
"Not clothes." He reached up with a hand and grazed her hair with the softest of touches then rested his hand on the wall, above her other shoulder.
Anticipation coiled within her. Slowly, agonizingly so, he leaned down until his lips hovered just above her own.
"Definitely not school." He whispered. Their lips touched.
Lips. His lips on her lips. Heat flowing from his mouth to her mouth and traveling down to her gut causing tendrils of flame to fire everywhere inside of her. More, she wanted more. Her lips parted and his tongue slid inside. And it wasn't enough. She put her hands on his waist. It wasn't enough.
One of them groaned or moaned and they opened their eyes. Slowly they pulled apart, lips still close enough that they traded each other's air with each breath.
"How was that?" he whispered, his dimples flashing.
"Nrg." She replied and leaned toward him. He pulled back just a little and she made a small noise of protest.
"We can't do this. Not here-not like this." His tone was laced with regret. He moved his hand from the wall and played with the tendrils of hair, tucking a stray lock behind her ear. "Buffy, will you go on a date with me? Tomorrow?"
A smile played at the corner of her mouth. "Yes."
Sam laughed happily and pulled her into his arms and she rested her head on his chest.
It was perfect.
Buffy had no recollection of how she made it home. As if in a haze, she walked through her bedtime routine, turned off her bedroom light and slipped between the cool sheets. At first sleep was elusive while she replayed the night over and over in her head. After kissing Sam, she realized that…what she felt for Angel paled in comparison to the feelings she had for Sam.
She knew that she needed to meet with Angel tomorrow. She needed to be straight with him, it was only fair.
She touched her lips and smiled as she thought about Sam. Sam. For the first time, she had finally allowed herself to feel, really feel. His kisses were so...NOT nice.
She drifted off to sleep with a grin on her face.
Too wrapped up in her memories of the evening, she didn't feel the eyes that watched her first from across the street and then, later, through her bedroom window.
Belatedly, he realized that at some point in the evening, he had lost his phone. Most likely, it had slipped from his pocket when he fell against Buffy outside of the Bronze. He made a mental note to go by the Bronze during his morning run and see if he could find it.
Sam got ready for bed, his thoughts on Buffy. When he found his phone, he would call his Dad and find a way to convince him that he should stay longer. If he found out he was still leaving in a few days, well, he would make the most of the little time he had left- he would research every potential job in the nearby area and come up with enough work to keep them there at least another month, maybe longer.
He put his hands behind his head and looked up at the ceiling.
That kiss. It was beyond great. It had definitely been (he grinned at the thought) NOT nice. His eyes eventually closed and he drifted off to sleep.
He was in a garden with fragrant blooms that blossomed all around him. He looked down at the rainbow of colors and sensing someone was nearby, he looked over, unsurprised at the blonde who appeared. It seemed natural that Buffy would be here with him.
"I think we are dreaming." She said. She was wearing shorts and a tank top and curiously he looked down at his own attire - boxer shorts.
"Is this my dream or yours?" He asked.
"Does it matter?" she replied.
"Nope. Not as long as you are here." He felt her hand slip into his as they shared a smile.
"I think I am getting addicted to that feeling." she said as they both looked at their linked hands.
"Why does that happen?" he wondered.
"You share a common link." The man appeared before them. Buffy and Sam accepted his presence without question.
"We do?" They spoke in unison and shared another smile.
"It's in the blood." The man smiled genially. "Hello Buffy. Hello Sam. It is good to see you both again."
They looked at the man, who beamed back at them.
"Have we met?" Buffy asked.
"Oh, yes. A few times, in fact." he chuckled. "Every time you die, you ask me that question."
"Die? I haven't died." Buffy looked alarmed, Sam put his arm around her shoulders.
"Sure you have. Both of you, in fact. Or, at least you will. I suppose it can get rather confusing." he chuckled. "Time is rather...elliptical here."
"Sir? Not to be rude, but where are we?"
The man chuckled again.
"Oh, well, I have made a mess of this, haven't I? Let me start over. I am Joshua. This is Heaven's Garden." Joshua spread his arms wide, indicating the space around them
Sam and Buffy looked at each other then back at Joshua. Joshua held up a hand as Buffy and Sam both opened their mouths to speak.
"No. Save the protest. We could go back and forth on this and it will take me too long to convince you of where we are. You are with me. I am Joshua. We are in Heaven's Garden."
Buffy shrugged.
"Okay, why are we here then." She asked.
Joshua nodded approvingly.
"I have always liked that about you, Buffy. You can accept and move on."
The scenery changed. Instead of standing in the middle of a garden, they were sitting on a patio, the Garden spread out in front of them.
"You are here so I can give you some advice."
"Advice?" Again, in unison.
"You weren't supposed to have met." Identical looks of surprise crossed their faces.
"But, now you have met. Some things will change and we can't predict how it will play out this time around. No. I'm not going to explain it, so don't ask. It doesn't matter anyways, you won't remember this when you leave."
"You brought us here, to give us advice that we won't remember?" Buffy clarified.
"Exactly." Joshua nodded, pleased. Buffy smiled.
"Then why bring us here at all?" Sam questioned.
"I'm a gardener." Joshua said, simply, as if that explained it all.
Buffy and Sam nodded.
Joshua picked up a packet and both teens opened their palms as he sprinkled something into each of their hands.
"It's my advice." Joshua told them as they peered at the tiny objects in their palms.
"They are seeds." Buffy stated. She and Sam had matching looks of inquiry on their faces, unable to decipher the meaning behind their gift.
Joshua nodded.
"I'm a gardener. I plant seeds." He said again.
Sam's expression cleared. "Because we won't remember being here."
"Very clever. Very clever." Joshua slapped Sam on the back in congratulation. "You are both well matched! I wish it was this easy with everyone. Now, m'dear, you first."
He gestured to Buffy.
The scenery changed, the patio disappeared and they stood in a greenhouse. Buffy stood before a row of small pots, each half-full with soil. Buffy picked up a seed and leaned forward. She held the seed between her thumb and forefinger over the first pot and waited. Joshua leaned forward and looked into her eyes.
"Buffy- you need to learn your origins. Slayer history. You need to do this sooner that you did before." Then Buffy released the seed and Joshua tapped her forehead. Buffy looked into the pot unsurprised to see that the seed had instantly sprouted.
"Oh. I guess this means research." she frowned and Joshua laughed, gesturing to Sam. "Don't fret m'dear. He will help you." He leaned toward Sam, conspiratorially. "There's a book for that, you know."
Buffy picked up another seed. She held it over the next pot.
"Look after your friends. They need you. In fact, one of them has needed you for a while. Pay attention!" He emphasized the last two words. "Do not let history repeat itself." Tap. Another sprout burst through the soil.
Joshua turned to Sam.
"Now Sam," He began.
"Wait! I have another seed!" Buffy interrupted. "Well, kind of. I guess it is a half-seed."
Joshua nodded agreeably. "So you do. We will save that for last."
He turned back as Sam picked up a seed.
"Sam- learn your origins! You need to find your bond with Buffy and understand it." Tap.
"Sam- you have gifts within. Embrace them. As long as you don't force them, you will be fine. BUT, remember moderation, m'boy. Nobody likes a glutton." Tap.
Sam looked down at his last seed. It looked like a seed had been cut in half. He and Buffy matched their seeds and together they made a whole seed.
Joshua looked solemn. Gently, he placed their hands together and closed his hands around theirs. He smiled at them.
"You feel that, yes? It is your bond. Your blood calls out to each other. Heed that call! Risk everything to heed that call-even if you fear rejection. Together, your blood can heal even the gravest of ...afflictions and injuries. Trust your bond!" Joshua removed his hands from their and tapped their foreheads.
"Wait. Did you say afflictions or addictions?" Sam asked.
"Does it really matter, Sam?"
"I guess not."
"Well, as always, it has been my pleasure. Until next time."
"Hopefully, we won't see you for many years." Buffy grinned.
The slightest wrinkle puckered Joshua's forehead and he paused for a moment. Something about his posture made Buffy tighten her finger's apprehensively around Sam's. Then the Gardener smiled and looked them each in the eye.
"Heed that call."
"Sammy. God, the kid sleeps like the dead. Sammy! Wake up." Dean was shaking him.
"Dean? What's wrong?" Sam asked, his voice groggy.
"Time to go. Pack up. Dad is in the shower right now and wants to be on the road in twenty minutes."
"Go? What time is it?"
"3:30 AM" Dean announced cheerfully.
"I don't understand." Go? As in leave Sunnydale? Leave Buf-
"Dad got a tip Sammy. Some demons heard we had been going in and out of Sunnydale and they were looking for some payback on Dad. Dad was worried they would get you instead. So, we hightailed it back to get you the hell out of Dodge. Pack up your stuff."
Sam sat up and put on his sweatpants and a hoodie, his mind racing.
He knew his father. If one of his boys was in danger, nothing would change John Winchester's mind. Sam thought fast.
Quickly, he packed up his few belongings and noted that Dean had already stacked his own spare clothes by the door, along with their Dad's. His eyes searched the room for the keys to the car as he slipped on his running shoes and quickly laced them. Unable to see them, he surmised that the keys must be in the bathroom with his Dad.
"I'm going to start loading the car." he said as he picked up his backpack in one hand and one of Dean's duffle bags in the other. Nonchalantly as possible, he walked out the door and let it close behind him. Opening the door to the Impala, he threw the duffle into the backseat, put on his backpack and ran out of the parking lot, hoping that if he was fast, he would only be gone an hour.
Dean would be pissed and Dad would be furious but Sam did not care.
Buffy woke up and stretched, kicked back her blankets and grinned. Life was good. She hummed as she got ready for school, took extra care with her hair and was unable to keep the perma-grin off of her face. Her mom dropped her off at school and she practically bounced inside the school. She went into the Library first, but Giles wasn't there, neither was Sam.
She was disappointed that she would have to wait to see him.
Just as the bell rang, she saw Willow, who was going in the opposite direction.
"I have something to tell you later!" They both said in unison as they passed by each other. "Jinx! Double Jinx! You owe me a Coke!" Again in unison. Laughing they gave up.
Sluggishly, her morning passed as she went from class to class in a haze of daydreams. Images of future dates with Sam (at the movies, going with each other to the Spring Fling, going to the beach…she imagined them all) kept her mind occupied while she half-heartedly copied notes from the chalkboard. She kept her eyes open for Sam, but she must have kept missing him.
At lunch, she whispered with Willow, confiding her feelings for Sam. While Willow agreed it was only fair that she talk to Angel, she also pointed out that he was the one to put restrictions on their relationship and, therefore, he had no claim on her.
In turn, Willow told her about the mystery man at the Bronze and how she discovered his identity.
They ended lunch with a quick hug and excited giggles; Willow was off to the computer lab for her next class, Buffy off to Biology.
Later, after what seemed to be the longest day in the history of school, the final bell rang and Buffy made her way to the Library.
Instantly, her good mood disappeared and a knot formed in her gut the closer she got to the Library. She had a bad feeling...
She walked through the double doors and tossed her book bag on to the closest table.
"Giles?" she called out.
"One moment." He called out to her.
"Have you seen Sam? I haven't seen him all day. We were supposed to meet in here this morn-" she stopped at the look on Giles' face.
Wordlessly, he handed her two items. One was a letter in a sealed envelope. The other was a postcard that the words "GREETINGS FROM SUNNYDALE" written across the front. She flipped it over. One the back were the words "write me here" and an address for Sam Winchester c/o Bobby Singer and a post office box number in Sioux Falls, South Dakota.
She looked at Giles.
"They were on my desk when I got here." he said.
She nodded. She picked up the envelope and post card, sliding them into the front pocket of her book bag then she walked out, passing by Willow and Xander without acknowledging them.
She went to the one spot where she knew she could be alone, the one place that only she and Sam knew about.
She got to her clearing and a ghost of a smile crossed her lips when she saw the sight. Obviously, Sam had been here a few times since they were last here. She walked up to the tree and touched the pile of homemade staves and stopped counting them when she reached twenty. She sat down in front of the tree and pulled out the envelope.
Taking a shaky breath, she opened it and withdrew the letter inside.
Buffy,
I guess I have set a record for making and breaking a date. I hope you can forgive me. Can I ask for a rain check?
My father and brother showed up at about 3:30AM after getting a tip that some demons had heard they were staying in town and that I was alone. If it weren't for the tip, I might have been able to convince my Dad to let me stay, for a little while at least.
I have to hurry.
I ran over to the school as soon as I could (I had to pick the lock on one of the doors and get into the Library) to leave these for Giles to give to you. I suppose it would have been easier to mail them, but I didn't want you to wonder why I left for too long.
I am going to try to get back - I asked you out and you said yes, so I owe you a date. I just might be a little late.
I hope you go to your clearing soon, I was there last weekend. I knew I would be leaving when my month was up, so I bought some stuff and put them in your box for you.
I'll be thinking about you. I will write you when I can and I hope you do the same. Bobby's is about the only permanent address I have. Send any mail in care of him and he will make sure I get it.
Sam
She pulled out her box and opened it. It was filled the brim.
On top was a first aid kit. A sticky note was stuck on top and the words "USE ME" and she let out a half-hearted laugh. She found her axe and knife -the axe had a leather cover with her initials engraved on the front; the knife had a sheath. She pulled out the knife and saw that it had been cleaned, polished and sharpened. She pulled out her axe. It, too, had been cleaned, polished and sharpened.
As she looked through her box she noticed the other items that had been added: a blade sharpener with another "USE ME" sticky note, some rolled up bulls eye targets, and a small one year membership card for "Mike's Gun Range". Another sticky read was stuck on the back of the card with "PRACTICE" written on it and underlined. This time a genuine laugh came from her.
At the bottom of the box was a stack of postcards. She turned them over. Each had Sam's address already completed and a stamp in the corner. She saw a pen with a note wrapped around it. She unrolled the note.
"You have no excuses! I'll be waiting to hear from you."
Buffy gathered up the postcards, pen, and gun range membership card and put them into her backpack. Carefully, she placed the other items into the box and put it back under the tree.
She didn't remember the walk home and she felt she was holding up rather well.
But, as she stepped up on her front porch, she felt a lump in her throat. The door opened before she touched it and her mom stood there and opened her arms as Buffy walked into them. A sob escaped her.
"Willow called. She told me. I am so sorry Buffy." She said in her soft voice.
She let the tears fall.
A/N: Yes? No? Right? Wrong?
-Stay tuned