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Chapter 10 The eavesdropper

"I'm sorry Shin. I didn't know….I'm so sorry. Let it all out. I'm here now!"

I felt myself slowly calming down as I stood there in the arms of my brother.
And as I stood there and my tears came to a stop I realized what just happened. My brother slapped me. He SLAPPED me!
My eyes widened at that thought. And now I was letting him hold me.
I must have lost my mind.
Disgusted with myself I broke away from him and took a few steps back.
I raised my eyes and looked him straight in the eye.

"You slap me and then you tell me that you didn't know about what they did? And I should believe that? How stupid do you think I am!" I said in a deathly whisper.

He seemed to battle something inside of him as he looked at me.
He opened his mouth to say something but closed it after a few moments as nothing came out.
I could only look at him with eyes full of anger. At any other moment I would have burst with glee at the sight of my brother speechless but now it only made me angrier.
No scratch that. I was pissed.
"What's the matter, brother? Nothing to say?" I said in a cold voice.
As he again couldn't seem to form words I only shook my head in disappointment.
I turned around and made my way to the door. I would not stand here and wait for him to make up his damn mind. It was humiliating enough as it is.
But just as I laid my hand on the doorknob a hand grabbed my arm and held it there preventing me from opening the door. I followed the hand with my eyes and looked Kaname in the eye.
"What?" I asked bitingly.
"Shin ….I made a mistake by slapping you, but you need to let me explain." He told me in a calm voice.
For a moment I could only stare at him. Was he serious?! He was standing there calm and collected and expected me to forgive him.
My god! He really did expect me to forgive him, after everything!
As I didn't answer him he continued.
"Listen! I know that I made mistakes. But we can work them out. You can stay here. With me and Yuki."
And with that I grew furious because it reminded me that while I was there and went through hell literally, my brother was here with Yuki, together, and watching over her. Happy. Without me.

I ripped my arm away and turned to him.
"12 Years! I waited 12 Years. For you. For an apology. And while I was waiting and humiliated and abused you were here playing family with Yuki. So please excuse me that I'm not exactly thrilled to see you. Hear your voice and apology. And you couldn't even do something so simple as apologize." I told him with an ice cold voice and with that I turned around and threw open the door. I pulled so harshly that I could hear it connect with the wall as I strode down the hallway. I made my way back the way we were coming from without looking back once. Just like he had.
He didn't come after me, didn't try to stop me a second time.
And that is exactly what it made it hurt so much more. Angrily I wished my tears away as they began to fall. I scolded myself for being so weak.
I made my way down the stairs and out of the door without meeting anybody and I was thankful for that.
I was relived as I reached the gate and slipped outside. I couldn't take it anymore and risked a gaze backwards.
I saw him standing at his window and looking down at me with a frown on his face.
I scowled at him and turned around breaking out into a run towards the chairman's house.
Luckily it was midnight so nobody was wandering around.
Finally I saw the house and to my surprise I saw that there was light in the kitchen.
I opened the door and closed it quietly behind me. Slowly I walked to the kitchen and opened the door.
Light streamed out of it and I needed a few minutes for my eyes to adapt. As I could finally see again I looked into the kitchen and saw Zero making his way around the kitchen.
It looked like he was cooking something.
Uncertainly I walked inside. I didn't want to disturb him.
Hearing my footsteps he turned around. He raised an eyebrow questioningly but shook his head and mentioned for me to take a seat.
I shrugged and sat down as I watched him cook. It was silent and I appreciated it.
I leaned back and just watched Zero. He didn't make a sound, didn't ask where I were coming from. That's just what I needed.
It seemed like I was immersed in my thoughts because suddenly I saw a plate put in front of me. I looked up and saw Zero going back to the stove and preparing another plate.
I smiled softly and sat up straighter.

Zero sat down across from me and began to eat.
I followed his action and began to eat myself. It was delicious. Freed rise with vegetables.
We ate in a comfortable silence.
As we were finished I stood up and took my plate to the washbasin and started to clean it.
Zero appeared beside me and I took his plate and washed it to as he began to clean up the stove.
We finished up and suddenly Zero turned to me and spoke. "Do you want to talk about it?"
I thought for a moment but I didn't really want to talk about it. It was too fresh. Hurt to much.
I shook my head. " No, at least not today."
He nodded and we made our way upstairs.
As we arrived upstairs I told him goodnight and went into my room.
I changed and slipped into my bed.
I lay there and just stared into the darkness.
"He is an idiot…" I muttered under my breath as I thought about the events of the evening.
He should have apologized and then explained what the hell he had been thinking!
I shook my head and turned on my side.
Slowly I felt myself fall asleep.

I shot up into a sitting position with a gasp. My hand reached automatically to throat but nothing was there.
I sat there panting for a moment.
'It was just a dream. Only a dream!' I soothed myself.
I had been dreaming about the attack but then Kaname had appeared and told me that I was disgusting. He had looked at me with such hatred in his eyes. I shuddered.
I slowly got out of bed. I wouldn't be able to fall asleep again.
I looked at the clock and saw that it was 4 in the morning. Sighing I got ready for the day.
As I walked down the stairs I suddenly heard voices.
Confused at who would be awake at this hour I drew slowly closer. I was careful to make no sound as I neared the kitchen which was the room where the person was in.
As I stood there and listened I heard the voice of the chairman softly.

"Are you sure that this is the right thing to do?" I heard the uncertainty in his voice.
I nearly gasped as I heard the voice answering.
"I told you already. It is necessary.", stated Kanames voice.
What were they talking about?
"Is it? You are hurting yourself and those people you are holding dear. How is that necessary?" Cross voice had an stern note in it.
I was really curious and confused.

"It is necessary because it protects him."
Him?
"And what do you think he will do when he finds out? He won't be jumping around happily and thanking you for this. Why would you do this to yourself! Why don't you tell him the truth?" Crosses voice was angry now.
This surprised me. I would have never expected him to talk like that to Kaname.
"I know that he won't be happy but he won't find out. I'll make sure of that."
A feeling of dread settled itself in my stomach. Was it possible that they were talking about him? But why would he need protection? And from whom?
"And what if he does? What then? Will you make him forget?", Crosses voice was dead serious now.
A suddenly loud bang from inside the kitchen made me jump in shock.

"I told you already. I'll make sure that he won't find out. For now he is allowed to stay here. For now he is safe. But should I hear that this person was sighted…..then he needs to disappear. I'll find a better family this time and he will stay with them. Far away from here. Maybe America.", As he said the last few sentence I could hear regret, hatred and sorrow in his voice.
Shocked and now absolutely sure that they were talking about me I could only stand there.
I couldn't leave. I wouldn't! Not when I just found him and Yuki.
A tear made its way down my cheek.

"It doesn't need to be that way Kaname. I know that you regret leaving him with these monsters and hurting him but it doesn't have to be that way. You could train him, protect him. Talk to him and explain the situation to him. But don't keep him out of this. Don't keep hurting him because you want to protect him Kaname. If you keep doing that you'll lose him. And this time forever.", Cross voice was soft with a note of desperation.
I could hear someone sigh.
"I know. I know all that Cross. But I just can't. I can't let him be dragged into this. I will protect him. At all cost. Even if I must hurt him and make him hate me.", Kanames voice was calm and firm. But under that I could hear the despair.
More tears escaped my eyes. What was my brother doing? Why was he hurting? Why does he think that he would protect me if he was hurting me?
I heard as someone stood up and ran quietly up the stairs and hid around the corner.
I could hear the footsteps as they made their way down the hallway and the front door opened and closed.
I ran into my room and went to my window.
As I looked outside I could see my brother walking away from the house and into the woods.
As I couldn't see him anymore I fell to my knees let out a sobbing breath.
My frame shook as sobs broke out of me.
What was going on with my brother?

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