Just Keep Smiling
Reiterative
Time was always slow when she worried. Tifa bade her last customers farewell before closing up; another hour and the family would be together again. It was hard to sit around doing nothing; she flipped through magazines and yet every time she glanced up at the clock what felt like hours was only minutes. Before long she was scrubbing at table surfaces; her fingertips raw and her teeth gritted in frustration as she threw the rag down on the table.
Cloud always picked Marlene and Denzel up from school, but the fact that he wasn't home and that she couldn't watch him leave to pick them up is what worried her the most. 'Have faith Tifa'. The voice startled her; she looked around bewildered only to be met by the empty bar. "Aer... no it can't be." she laughed at herself. It was probably just her own consciousness reassuring her turmoiled mind.
Tifa mentally debated with herself as she continued cleaning; forcing herself to not look up at the clock, if she did time would only work against her as it seemed to have fun doing.
The phone rang her eyes narrowing in and she briefly glanced at her cellphone reading 4:15. It was probably Cloud calling to tell her he took the kids out for ice cream, it wasn't unusual for them to take a detour, but sometimes she wished he would tell her. Yet, in the back of her mind she knew Cloud always called her phone and not the bars. As she crossed over to the phone she went through the many scenarios that Cloud would opt for calling 7th Heaven, but upon looking at the callers ID she furrowed her brows and hesitantly reached for the phone.
"Tifa Lockhart speaking; are Marlene and Denzel alright?"
The only times the school ever called home was either they did bad in school or someone was hurt; it only added to her worry maybe it was why Cloud was late and he couldn't call it was an emergency. Tifa was worried and it was expressed in her repeating the question before the woman on the other line could even answer her.
'They're fine Ms. Lockhart, but we were wondering if anything happened to Mr. Strife hes never been late before let alone no show. The kids are getting restless and worried.'
Worry turned to confusion and confusion evaporated into a frustrated anger. Tifa swallowed and breathed deeply the woman on the other line grew impatient as she started calling out 'Hello'. It took ever fiber of her being to sound calm and 'normal'.
"Yes, Cloud was feeling ill I had just got off the phone with him and was on my way; I'll be there within the next few minutes."
Tifa hung up before she received a response; once more she had to cover for Cloud so they would not look like bad guardians. The last thing she needed was Cloud being the reason why the children's problems would be blamed on their parenting, so far the kids were doing well, but one slip up and it would be on their head... it's how things were starting to become now that the WRO had a stronger foothold.
With no car Tifa had to make her way over to the neighbors; a young couple who were still enjoying the 'honeymoon' phase of their relationship. Tifa made note to let them drink for free the next time they were over.
Tifa had been their in record time; she pulled up in front of the school the two sitting on the bench Marlene's head resting on Denzel shoulder while he stared blankly on the ground. Tifa's maternal instincts were on over drive and in a matter of seconds she was crouched in front of the two sad faces that looked back at her.
"The school said Clouds not feeling well."
It was always Denzel who spoke Marlene was trying to be strong lips pursed it was hard not breaking the news to them that Cloud was no where to be found, instead, she guided them to the car the two huddled in the back.
"Everything is going to be alright."
It was all she could say as the two settled in the back.
'Where are you Cloud? I hope you're OK.'
Tifa was not going to jump to conclusions she would made excuses for him, she would give him the benefit of the doubt and she would not lose faith- only for them.
The ride had been silent and even as the children sat picking at their snack it hurt her heart knowing that the children were sad because Cloud was sick, but still neither one questioned his whereabouts, not until that moment.
"Where's Cloud?"
Marlene's voice was small, fearful, and it brought back painful memories of when Cloud had disappeared last. Tifa gritted her teeth staring at her phone still on the counter top. Countless times had she debated to call him, but she wanted him to own up to his responsibility- it was his turn to call first for once.
"He had to go to Kalm. Elmyra will take better care of him and the air is cleaner there. He'll be back soon and he'll be just as strong as before. I hope."
The last part she said to herself, she couldn't worry about Cloud abandoning them; he couldn't be that cold and heartless. He was Cloud; he saved the world twice and only turned his back on them because it was the only way he knew how to help... he wasn't a shell like people thought him to be.
Tifa's reassurance seemed to positively affect the children and before long the were talking animatedly upstairs and working on homework, albeit loudly. 'Just keep smiling, Tifa, for them'.
Her conscious was quite the sneaky bastard, but the voice sounded more like her own this time and she knew that earlier it wasn't who she initially thought. It was obvious that she had only heard that voice because she had been in her mind. Tifa's hand went up to clutch the ribbon, it was nearing the three year mark. Tifa could only remember how early on in their journey was their friend ripped away from them. Maybe... they could all visit her and take flowers from the church; Marlene would like that.
She'd run the idea by Cloud when he returned, after chewing his head off with another speech.
Before calling Barret for Marlene to speak to her father, Tifa had explained to the children that Clouds sickness upset Barret and that it was best they not mention it. It wasn't in her nature to lie to the children, but she had no choice the truth would be to much for them.
Still the children accepted her explanation with no questions, it wasn't even in Barret's nature to 'feel upset' not about something like this, but Tifa had taken advantage of the kids trust and it hurt.
Tifa was slowly starting to feel resentment and while smiling as Marlene animatedly, yet cautiously, spoke to her father. How could he allow her to be in such a situation? It had been hours and not even a phone call? She was degraded to lies and false smiles for their sakes; was this the life she was to look forward to? It was easy to make excuses for him, but she was running out of them fast. Biting down on her lower lips Tifa was happy with being given Marlene's back; she didn't deserve to see anger on Tifa's face.
Taking the phone from Marlene Tifa spoke to Barret sounding as natural as possible.
"How's spiky doin? Assholes phone mus' be switched off or som'in. I get sent to voice mail with no ringin'. How the hell am I supposed to ask how the punk's doin' if he ain't gon answer his damned phone!"
She was prepared for this and did not hesitate to answer. Tifa made sure she was out of earshot as Marlene made her way to taking the bar chairs down from the tables.
"He's busy, I think where his delivery is has no reception something about the chocobo sage needing an important package sent. The kids are kinda upset about it, but it's expected."
And the conversation continued Tifa speaking only when she needed to as Barret explained the various sources of energy they could harness and a new oil project he was heading. When she bade farewell it came as a relief that he didn't question her about Cloud any farther. With the phone call done Marlene skipped away ponytail bouncing and secured by a pink ribbon; she could pass off as Aerith's child very easily. It was ironic how many fingerprints the flower girl left on the world, an insignificant flower girl to the world was the true savior of earth. Tifa saw her everywhere; in the flowers that bloomed, in the cured children who played fearless on the streets and in the child her friend had saved when Tifa couldn't even save Sector 7.
"Hey hey sexy bar lady, wanna whip us up something strong."
The voice brought Tifa back to the real world, her fists instinctively clenched and her yes darted from one figure to the other before relaxing her stance and scowling at the fiery red head first.
"Reno I'm not open for another hour it clearly says closed."
"Yeah, but we're friends! Everyone knows that bars are open earlier for old pals. Am I right rude?"
His loud voice only irritated Tifa further, perhaps this was a blessing in disguise; someone she could take her anger on until Cloud came back. Before answering them she called up the stairs.
"Lights out kids, you've got a long day planned out for you tomorrow."
She could hear the two groan but agreed and bade her goodnight. With the lights out and the door shut she was comfortable with returning her attention to Reno and Rude.
"Fine, but I'm charging you extra for being a pain in the ass."
Reno was about to interject, but the look Rude gave Reno shut him up instantly. Maybe Rude was more useful without the sunglasses; he should take them off more often.
'Sit down... how about... something to drink?"
'Give me something hard.'
A small smile graced her lips at the memory; she was mixing the exact same drink for the Turks and she wondered if they could handle it like Cloud did. Placing the drink in front of them while opening her own beer bottle on the edge of the table she raised her bottle and muttered cheers which Reno echoed excitedly; Rude on the other hand only raised his glass and nodded.
Tifa on occasion would drink with the customers, pacing herself and ensuring she was sober throughout the night. When the bar was closed to the public and the old team was together it wasn't uncommon for Tifa to get drunk, but she was good at controlling herself; unlike her friend Yuffie who always ended up stumbling around the place and passing out on Tifa's bed- quite the ninja.
As she drank in silence Reno going on about something uninteresting and Rude humoring him with a few nods, Tifa found herself missing the times they were all together. Everyone had a purpose in life; Reeve and his WRO, Barret lived and worked to better the planet for Marlene, Yuffie had her family, Cid got married, Nanaki was looking for someone named 'Deneh' whom Tifa never heard about; the oddest part was when asked Nanaki always responded with 'you'll see'...
"Round 2 babe! Same thing damn that stuff burned so good!"
Reno's loud voice snapped her out of her train of thought. Picking up their glasses she gave them sweetest smile she could; the sarcasm evident in the lines etched in the corners of her lips.
"Call me babe again; and I'll make sure you cant torment another woman with you hyperactive libido."
Reno childishly stuck his tongue out earning him an eye roll from both Rude and Tifa.
The Turks were up at their third round of drinks before Tifa opened the bar. Business had picked up ever since geostigma had gone. Customers had become friends and and her new found friends poured into the bar loud voices booming from every corner. With the extra money Cloud and she had been able to save they were able to rebuild the children room so that it was sound proof. Even though the children had grown used to the sounds and could sleep through it; it wasn't fair for them.
"Another round of shots here my dear!"
"Two pitchers for me and my boys!"
Tifa scrambled around the bar fulfilling orders, she should start getting help even though Cloud was helpful on occasion she needed someone more permanent.
"Ey Teef wanna ge me more o th—that stuff?"
Reno was starting to get sloppy, she'd water his drink down and not charge him as much for it, but the idea of a drunken Reno was funny.
"Thats what I'm talking about son! You call those muscles THESE are muscles!"
Rude had jumped up; he had been arm wrestling a burly looking man and in the process knocked over one of her tables. Tifa was going to make him pay for it if she found it in broken in anyway.
As the night proceeded Tifa couldn't help but glance at the door often. When the door bell chimed she there was a temporary moment of relief thinking it was Cloud, but the smiling gazes of her everyday customers brought disappointed. Just keep smiling.
Rude bade them all farewell something about Shinra needing him Reno waved him off and stayed getting drunker by the second singing unintelligible songs with the other patrons. Tifa took shots with some of her customers; her cheeks stained red with the alcohol it was getting late and everyone was already starting to stumble out; arms around each others shoulders trying to stabilize each other and themselves. The scene never got old. As the last patron left she locked the door and turned the sign so it read closed.
Crossing over to the bar she poured herself another drink and downed it in a single gulp. Cloud still hadn't come home grabbing her phone she eyed his name on her phone list and after debating with herself she decided to call.
"You have reached the voice mailbox of Cloud Strife please leave..."
Tifa hung up, not even a ring? Was she to be worried or angry? Tifa felt confused, upset, worried and frustrated because she thought there would be change, but how was this any different than before? Their family was dysfunctional, because all Cloud could do was walk away.
"Where's e'ryone? Where's tha boyfriend? He'd a kicked me out by n—now."
Reno zipped up his pants and scratched the back of his head. He watched Tifa place the phone down and he gave her an odd look. Soon enough Reno was smirking and edging his was towards her.
"Walked out on ya again? Damn that kid just doesn't stop fuckin up."
He sounded more sober; and Tifa faintly wondered if his drunkenness was an act or if the alcohol was starting to leave his system. Upon closer inspection though his eyes were somewhat glazed and she could tell Reno wasn't himself... it didn't stop her from feeling a bit of anger towards the Turk.
"You know nothing of Cloud. How dare you come to our home and talk like that to my face."
She turned to the tables picking up the pitchers and glasses then crossing over and tossing them into the sink; she could tell she broke a few, but she needed to take her anger on something before turning a drunken man into a punching bag.
"Ya know..."
"Shut up and get out."
Her jaw was clenched and her fingers clutched the edge of the counter top. Was he here to torment her? Se closed her eyes and waited for the door chime to sound either signaling Reno's departure or Clouds arrival, but when neither came she heavily sighed and looked up.
He was standing at her side a foreign look that Tifa had never seen from the fiery haired Turk. Was it concern or was her own intoxication skewing her perception?
"You deserve better than him. He leave you and those kids. Don't those kids deserve a father figure whose around all the time?"
It was almost as if he knew her thoughts; Tifa took a step back to compose herself. She was stunned into silence looking at Reno, but glancing at the door praying that Cloud would walk in and prove the Turk wrong.
"You don't know Cloud. He loves us we're his only family."
"He aint comin', guy's always ditching you Tifa. Those kids need a man to care for them, not a boy chasin the past."
"Cloud loves those kids Reno; you don't know anything about him."
Reno tried grabbing Tifa's hand, but she slapped his hand away angrily 'He's drunk Tifa calm down' it didn't help though no matter how much she kept reassuring herselfshe just wanted to hurt him.
"Yeah yet he leaves them to go chasing that dead hottie wh-"
Tifa stared at Tifa bewildered her hand stung and his cheek began turning red; she hoped it would leave a lasting mark.
"Get out NOW!"
He was stubborn he rubbed his cheek; how did he still stand there even after speaking ill of the dead. She didn't care how much alcohol he had to consume this was Aerith and Cloud he was talking about.
Reno brought a hand to her neck and stroked Tifa's jaw, she didn't move, but just glared. She'd have to beat him out of the bar, but what he did next she didn't expect.
His lips brushed against her own and she protest but stood stiffly. A brush of his lips turned into a kiss and Tifa's eyes went wide with surprise.
At first she tried to push him, but his arms wrapped tighter around her waist and pulled her closer. She wanted to fight him off, but the alcohol in her system overpowered her own physical strength.
"Let me take care of you Teef."
The voice melted into Clouds, green eyes turned mako blue and red hair was blond. Tifa reciprocated the kiss, pressing her body closer to 'Cloud', but when she opened her eyes to look it wasn't Cloud, but the Turk. She wanted to push him, she wanted to get rid of him, but she liked the feeling of a man holding her making her feel special and wanted. The alcohol didn't help in the slightest; Tifa didn't protest anymore.
AN: And finally chapter 2! I wanted to thank those who took the time to review and I really appreciated it. I tried to see things in Tifa's eyes, especially towards the end, I know I may have delved further from her persona, but I still feel like Tifa is after all human and any human would do something out of character at least once in their life. In due time you will find out about Cloud, but I don't want to rush the story I want to take my time explaining things (I know the bar scene was long, but understanding her day to day life I feel is necessary) and justifying actions so bear with me I promise it will pick up soon. I hope you like it so far! Reviews and especially criticism is appreciated and welcomed once again update for chapter three should be up by July 10th.