Chapter 10
Dominique was very quiet as she braided my damp hair. The silence in the room was not uncomfortable, but I waited nervously for her reaction. I had told her everything from the first time Scorpius and I had talked to the almost-kiss at the Quidditch pitch only hours before. She was a good listener and didn't interrupt once, nor did she scold me in any way, shape or form for even thinking of associating with a Malfoy.
"Rosie…" She trailed off. She seemed to be at a loss for words.
"Are you mad at me?" I asked, feeling like I had to force the words out. My throat was raw from sobbing and talking.
"Merlin, no!" She said, sounding surprised. A huge weight seemed to lift off my chest. "I'm just confused… I thought that we hated the Malfoy family."
"Well, I thought we did too. Have you ever actually met one of them?" I asked.
Dominique wanted to retaliate, but she couldn't "Aside from Scorpius, no. Truthfully, I've never spoken to him either." She seemed guilty, but I knew it wasn't really her fault. From day one, my father had drilled it into my head: The Malfoys were not to be trusted under any circumstances. But this year, I had crossed the invisible line and found a whole new world on the other side.
"Our parents haven't exactly made it easy to trust them." I said. Even Uncle Harry, who treated everyone he met with respect and kindness, couldn't bring himself to talk nicely about the Malfoy family. He often got purple in the face and had to excuse himself while my dad turned red and uttered a few choice words.
"Rosie, why didn't you just tell me? I wouldn't have said anything to James or Albus." Dominique turned me to face her. She had hurt in her eyes. "Don't you trust me?"
"Of course I do, Dom. I would trust you with anything. I think this was just a strange position to be in." Dominique nodded like she was trying to understand.
"You have no idea how good it feels to have someone know about this." I said, letting out a huge sigh. Dom patted my back.
"I couldn't keep a secret like that if I tried." She smiled sympathetically. "I won't tell anyone. Not unless you want me to. I wouldn't want to be the reason you two would break up—
Wait. Break up?
"Dom, Scorpius and I aren't dating." I said. She got that look on her face that only appeared when she was discussing relationships and boys with me.
"Well, I know… but Rose you're making it pretty obvious that there's something more between you two." I must have had quite a comical look on my face. I couldn't believe Dominique actually thought Scorpius might be interested in me as more than a friend.
"That's not the case. We're just friends." I said quickly, looking down at my bare feet on the carpet. I was wearing my favorite Chudley Cannons pajama pants, a gift from my dad. I didn't even like the team, but they were the softest things I owned. I fingered the familiar material and almost smiled. It was times like these that I felt like I needed my parents the most.
"Friends who kissed?" She supplied.
"We didn't kiss! We almost did, but we didn't!" I insisted.
"Rose, who are you trying to convince? Me or yourself?" Dominique asked. I realized I didn't really know the answer. The almost-kiss had been tearing me apart all evening. The way Scorpius acted after was killing me too.
"Rosie, did you want him to kiss you? Would you have let him if you actually got the chance."
I buried my face in my knees, inhaling the scent of my home in my pajamas. All the memories I had made with Scorpius were running through my head like a moving portrait. My heart started pounding unnaturally, and my face grew red. Slowly, I nodded.
"Rose?" Dominique placed a hand on my back.
"Yes. I would have let him. Hell, I would've kissed him back!" I mumbled into my knees.
"Oh, Rose…" Dom trailed off again. I pulled my face up. I was not going to cry again. It actually felt good to come face to face with my feelings.
"Do you want to tell the rest of the family?" She asked.
"No!" I almost shouted. "They would think Scorpius was pressuring me or something. He would get in serious trouble!"
"Rose, calm down. We won't tell anyone." She said with a reassuring smile.
I nodded, taking a deep breath. I felt like I hadn't slept for years. Dom and I talked for a little bit more, about stupid things to get my mind off of everything else. Finally, we retired to bed, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't sleep.
…
The next week, Scorpius and I were awkwardly polite towards each other. I was just glad we were talking. The first day after the almost-kiss, I was afraid Scorpius would be avoiding me. He smiled at me in the Great Hall at breakfast and asked to borrow my newt eyes in Potions and he carried my books just as he always did. He walked me to my common room, and then patted me on the shoulder again. This was the same case for the rest of the week, and by Friday, I had almost completely gone insane.
Saturday came bright and early. I woke up before anyone else in my dorm, which I was glad of. Dominique had been helping me stay sane all week while juggling schoolwork and Colin. She deserved a break. I quietly brushed my teeth, got dressed and grabbed my schoolbag. Today, I would study.
As I made my way to the common room, I began to think of what Scorpius would say if he knew I was going to the library right now to spend my Saturday reading and taking notes. He would most likely scoff, comment sarcastically on it, and then mess up my hair. But Scorpius hadn't been like himself lately, so it was difficult to picture him doing that right now.
Downstairs in the common room, Albus was asleep on the couch, hair flattened to one side against the pillow. I smiled at my lazy cousin, and tried to quietly creep past. However, Albus had the sharp reflexes of a seeker, and jolted awake.
"Gosh, Rosie!" He said, placing a hand over his heart. "Nearly killed me!"
I giggled. "Al, I didn't do anything." He smiled.
"I know." He sat up, stretched and cracked his joints, which made me wince. I hated it when people did that.
"What are you doing up so early?" He asked. I gestured to my school bag.
"Really, Rosie? Going to study on a Saturday morning?" He asked in disbelief. I shrugged, looking down at my feet.
He could tell I was bothered. "I mean, that's great if you want to— but how about you spend some time with your favorite cousin? We haven't talked in ages!"
I smiled at him. Albus was right, we hadn't spoken for a while because of Scorpius on my end, and a busy schedule on his. I dropped the bag on the couch, knowing no one would dare touch it.
"Alright, let's do something then." I said brightly. Al smiled, and smoothed his hair out with his fingers, then purposely messed it up again. He had been cursed with his father's messy hair since birth.
We exited through the portrait hole, making small talk. Passing the great hall, I noticed there were very few people inside. It was too early for anyone else to be awake.
"Want to go down to the Quidditch pitch?" Albus asked. I gulped, memories of that place slamming into me like a sealed Platform 9¾. However, Albus didn't know about the drama between Scorpius and I, so I agreed halfheartedly.
We made our way outside, the fresh air clearing my head slightly. Hagrid's cabin was covered in a thin layer of frost, the pumpkins looking ripe and huge. The Halloween feast would be coming up soon I noted. We passed the greenhouses and the vegetable patch, and then finally came upon the Quidditch pitch. Albus was telling me a funny story while entering, but faltered when he saw who was inside.
The Slytherin Quidditch team had apparently booked their practice for this morning, and Al and I had stumbled right into it.
The Slytherins hadn't noticed that we were there, probably because there were a few people in the stands already. Not that they would really care anyway. Ever since the war when our parents were only seventeen, the houses had gotten along much more nicely, if not only tolerating eachother. People knew that it was better to form alliances than to make enemies by this point.
Albus huffed next to me with an annoyed look on his face.
"Wanna get out of here, Rose? We don't have to hang around their practice if you don't want to." Al sounded as annoyed as he looked, but I could also tell he was itching to observe the practice and compare their moves against his own. It technically wasn't allowed to watch other team's practices, but no one had ever been stopped in the act before.
"No, it's okay." I answered, seeing the look of longing grow in Al's eyes. I could almost see the Quidditch tactics and maneuvers running through his mind.
Albus led us over to a secluded part of the stands, so we wouldn't be bothered by other Slytherins in the crowd, and we took our seats. It was slightly chilly outside again, and I had been silly enough to wear only a thin jacket and boots. Once again, I had forgotten gloves and stuffed my stiff with cold fingers into my pockets. Al was leaning forward eagerly in his seat, eyes on the team as they flew around the pitch.
"Ooh, looks like Taft has a strained muscle, I'll have to report that back to James…" He muttered. I rolled my eyes with a smirk; So much for spending "quality time" with my favorite cousin. I sat back trying to keep warm and went over notes from Arithmancy in my head.
As the practice went on, I tried to avert my eyes from Scorpius, who was flying around with the other beater. I watched the Chasers, the Keeper, and the Seeker until my head hurt and my eyes were tired. Conceding defeat, I glanced at Scorpius in the air and took a small breath. With the slightly windy and grey morning, Scorpius stood out against his dreary background. His emerald green robes were billowing around him, the wind catching his white-blonde hair in a sort of halo around his head. His sleepy grey-blue eyes looked focused and determined as he tightly clutched his beater's bat in his hand. I had never fully appreciated just how good looking Scorpius really was— nor had I noticed just how tight and form fitting the Quidditch uniforms were. Scorpius's arms were definitely more noticeably defined than usual. Merlin, he was attractive. Was I just realizing this now?
I caught myself in my thoughts, physically shaking my head. I was getting distracted. I had to focus on the Arithmancy test that would be coming up soon. Dominique had worked too hard at keeping my thoughts away from Scorpius and our little episode on the Quidditch pitch. I couldn't let myself fall back into that emotional trap again. Still, watching Scorpius seemed to be the only thing I could do at the moment. He soared around the pitch, whacking at enchanted balls with his bat, giving high fives to his colleagues. He looked truly happy in the air, like he had left all of his problems on the ground to revisit at a later time.
Albus was like a third year in Honeydukes for the first time. A glazed, dreamy expression had taken over his face as he watched the team; every once in a while, he would mutter something that had to do with Quidditch or reporting back to James. I glanced down at my watch and nearly did a double take when I saw the time. It had been an hour and a half, well past the acceptable time to be having breakfast. Now that I was informed of the time, my stomach made itself audible. Albus turned towards me with a funny smirk on his face.
"It's late isn't it? We should go to the Great Hall and eat. James will want to hear about all this anyway." Albus stood up and started to make his way down the stands, which were slowly emptying as the few spectators left for breakfast as well. I stood up slowly, my joints cold and achy. I really had to start dressing better for the weather at hand.
"You coming Rosie?" Albus called from the ground. The Slytherin team were starting to dismount their brooms, fist bumping and comparing tactics. Scorpius was on the ground again, checking his broom and conversing with his fellow beater. My stomach did a funny kind of flip upon seeing him on equal ground again.
I hastily nodded at Albus and started to climb down the steep stairs of the stands. My pace was slow as I wasn't very fond of heights or highly collapsible and more than likely flammable Quidditch stands that were most likely being held together by magic. I tried to hurry so Scorpius wouldn't see me, but it was too late. He was already looking at me when I glanced his way again. He did an awkward gesture with his hand that I took as a wave. I wiggled my fingers at him (a very difficult task at the moment) and he started to make his way over. Al glanced over towards him, his face screwing up in disgust upon seeing him.
Once on the ground, Albus took my shoulder. "Why is Malfoy coming over here?" My voice caught in my throat.
"Um, I've been tutoring him…" I started to say. Albus' eyes widened.
"Tutoring? For how long? You never told us—"
"It's not a big deal, Al. He probably just wants to ask about homework. I'll catch up with you in a minute. Go on to breakfast." I said sternly. Al shrugged at me and exited the pitch. I couldn't tell if he was angry or not.
"What's up with Potter?" Scorpius asked, coming up behind me. After all this time, he was still very good at sneaking up on me. I jumped slightly. A ghost of a smile appeared on his face.
"Nothing's up, he's just hungry." I lamely said. Scorpius cocked an eyebrow.
"I thought Quidditch wasn't your thing." He remarked.
"Um, it isn't. Al just thought we should go for a walk and we came upon your practice…" I trailed off.
"It's okay, Rose. I was just wondering."
An awkward silence stretched between us. I shivered slightly as a particularly cold gust of wind blew in our direction.
"Are you cold? Do you want me to grab my jacket? It's just in the changing rooms—"
My heart fluttered slightly. "No, it's fine. I was heading up anyway." Scorpius nodded.
"Right, well I'm coming up too. I just have to change." He gestured towards the changing rooms where the rest of his team resided.
It was my turn to awkwardly nod. This conversation was going nowhere fast.
"Do you have any plans today?" He asked suddenly. I looked up at him quickly, my neck protesting in pain from the sudden movement.
"Well, no… I mean I was going to maybe—"
"Study?" He finished. There was a true smirk on his face. I felt like crying and kissing him and slapping him all at once. I hadn't seen that smirk in what felt like ages.
"No!" I snapped with a smile in my voice. "I mean yes, but…"
"Rose, why don't we do something other than study today? We haven't done that in a while." My heart was pounding out of my jacket again. I was going to get to actually spend time with Scorpius today. Maybe I would be able to find out what was really going on between us. Maybe things could really work out for the better… or they could end terribly.
I found myself agreeing. "As long as you quiz me on my Arithmancy notes at least once." Scorpius laughed in slight disbelief, but nodded.
"Do you want to wait for me? I'll only be a moment; I just have to get out of these smelly things." He picked at his green and silver robes.
"Yeah, sure." I tried to contain my smile. I followed Scorpius to the changing rooms which were mercifully empty by now.
"I'll be in the showers; I'll only be a minute changing." He said, strolling through the curtains that sectioned off the rooms. I sat down on one of the benches, admiring the many trophies and brooms that lined the walls of the changing rooms. I knew I would be much more interested in the Quidditch games this year than any other year before.
As time passed, my heart began beating just a little bit faster. I convinced myself it was because of the cold weather that the tent couldn't avoid. However, I knew I was kidding myself. I rubbed my hands together to supply some warmth and told myself Scorpius would only be a few more minutes.
There was a sudden thump coming from the changing rooms, followed by what sounded like Scorpius swearing under his breath; I quirked an eyebrow, curiously standing up and strolling over to the curtain.
"Scorpius…?" I asked. Had he tripped or something?
"Um… would you mind helping me Rose?" He asked in an embarrassed voice. My heart fluttered. "Oh calm down!" I scolded it silently. Perhaps all this was a case of cardiac arrest? I could only hope.
"Yeah, um… can I come in?" I asked awkwardly. How much had Scorpius already gotten himself undressed?
"Please do." He mumbled. With that, I stepped through the curtain and almost laughed. Scorpius was sitting on the ground like a child in distress tangled in his padding laces.
"I've never been good at tying things…" He trailed off as I kneeled down to his level and attempted to pick apart the knots in his equipment. He had managed to get off his shin guards and arm pads, but the padding around his torso had yet to come off. He sat there patiently as I worked on the knots, managing to get some of them free. My fingers were still cold, but the activity and Scorpius's proximity seemed to be warming them very quickly.
Finally, I had gotten enough of the laces loose for the padding to slide off him. With a relieved sigh, he tossed the padding into his bag in the corner and without warning, pulled his tight, green shirt up and over his head.
My eyes widened at his exposed chest and I immediately covered them with my hands. Was I violating his privacy? Had he meant to do that? Could he possibly know what kind of effect he had on me?
"Oh, sorry!" He said, realizing what he had done. "Force of habit." He chuckled. Peeking through my fingers, I admired his body. He was busy folding the shirt carefully and didn't notice as I raked my eyes over his toned stomach and his nicely defined arms. He wasn't too buff, but definitely not weak. I could really appreciate the light tan he was sporting, which was a nice contrast against his light hair. Suddenly, he glanced up in my direction and that famous smirk grew on his face.
"Like what you see?" He asked teasingly. I turned red, warmth finally creeping up from my toes to my face. I tried to come back with a clever come back, but I couldn't. I knew Scorpius was expecting one too. I dropped my hands from my face and turned away from him. These feelings were turning out to be a lot harder to control around him than I thought they would be. Heck, they were hard to control when I wasn't even near him!
"I'll just— I'll just go back in there." I said weakly, gesturing to the previous room in the tent.
Scorpius placed a hand on my shoulder and turned me towards him. He looked confused and a little upset. "I didn't mean to offend you Rose… It was just supposed to be funny." He dropped his hand and gave me a halfhearted smile. I returned it, or at least I thought I did.
"Rose what is wrong with you today? You seem upset, or confused or maybe both."
Wow. I was really shit at hiding my emotions wasn't I?
"Nothing's wrong, it's just—"
"Just what?"
I sighed in desperation. Could he really not tell what was going on?
"I— I guess I've been thinking about that one night at the pitch. When you taught me how to fly and actually play Quidditch and then…" I trailed off at the blank expression on his face. He didn't remember.
"Never mind." I mumbled. I turned away again to leave through the flap and gather my feelings.
"I almost kissed you." He stated firmly. I stopped in my tracks. He had remembered. Was this good or bad?
"That night I almost kissed you and if it weren't for that damn Hayden who calls himself my 'best friend'—"
"What about Hayden?" I asked, whipping around and surprising even myself. Scorpius's eyes were darker than usual, reminding me of stormy grey clouds on a wet fall day.
"What if Hayden had never showed up?" I asked again. I was determined for an answer. If I didn't have explanations soon, I was completely positive I would have a nervous breakdown right there.
Scorpius took one step towards me, then another and another until he was only a few inches away. I stood my ground, though my heart was screaming at me to move, to do something.
"If Hayden hadn't ever come into the pitch that night, we wouldn't be skirting around this conversation. You wouldn't look so god damn scared, and I wouldn't feel this nervous." He said. I swallowed, feeling like there wasn't enough air in the tent to supply my lungs with the oxygen they craved.
"We wouldn't be doing any of that right now." He stated again. Then, without warning, without any little hint at all, Scorpius closed the space between us and pressed his lips to mine.
I was shocked to say the least, and for a few seconds that felt like ages, it was just Scorpius's lips moving against mine. But I found myself kissing him back, reaching my hands up to run through his hair.
I felt something soft drop onto my feet and realized he had dropped his shirt that he had been holding to wrap his arms around my waist. This was nothing like simply hugging Scorpius after a good day on the grounds or at Hogsmeade. This was absolutely nothing like kissing Robin. It was better. It was the best feeling I had ever experienced. Better than getting a perfect O on my transfiguration test.
His mouth parted slightly, taking mine with it. I felt him suck lightly on my bottom lip, then his tongue carefully gliding against my own. I felt lightheaded as I responded; doing my best to keep up with him in the state I was in. His thumbs were rubbing circles on my lower back.
Finally, for much needed air, we both pulled apart rather reluctantly. He leaned his forehead against mine as I collected my breath, the taste of peppermint from his breath lingering in my mouth.
"I was hoping we would be doing that instead." He whispered. He leaned in again, but was very tentative as he carefully and lightly kissed me.
"Would that be alright with you?" He mumbled against my lips, making my head swim. It was all I could do to weakly nod and smile against his mouth. We broke apart again, and he pulled me into a hug. I rested my head in the crook of his neck, finally feeling warm in all the right ways. I silently squealed at the fact that I had just snogged Scorpius Malfoy while he still wasn't wearing a shirt.
After a minute, we pulled away. Scorpius needed to finish dressing and then we would have to head up to the Great Hall to eat breakfast. Eating seemed like a waste to me, considering I now had many more interesting activities to pursue, but I knew Scorpius would be hungry after a long practice. He pulled a black sweatshirt over his head, and made me leave while he changed his pants. I giggled stupidly on the other side of the curtain and busied myself with a loose thread on my jacket sleeve.
Scorpius came out finally, his bag completely packed and him fully dressed. He smiled at me and offered his hand. I took it gladly, our fingers lacing together. We exited the tent silently, neither of us needing to talk about what had just happened. We both knew what it meant. As we crossed the chilly grounds, our hands intertwined between us, I thought about my family. They would surely be in the Great Hall by now, eating breakfast and goofing off as usual. The last thing they would expect would be seeing Scorpius and I entering the Great Hall looking very much like a couple.
I almost felt guilty as Scorpius's hand tightened around mine like he knew what I was thinking. When we crossed the entrance hall to the doors of the Great Hall, we both dropped hands.
"You don't want your family to see us together." He said. He wasn't accusing me of anything, but I knew he had come to the same conclusion I had before.
"It might not be the best idea right away. They need to warm up to you first, I think." I said sadly.
"How much warming up do you suppose that'll take?" He asked. His eyes twinkled as he looked at me and a lopsided grin graced his face.
"A little." I lied. He quirked an eyebrow. I sighed. "Okay, maybe a lot. But trust me; I can get them to accept this. And if they can't, then so be it."
He smiled again. "So until then, we're keeping this a secret then?" He asked.
"Yes. If that's okay. I know it's stupid…" He grabbed my hand again, thumb rubbing against the back of my hand.
"It's not stupid. It's going to be hard, but it's the best option." He agreed. Looking around to see that no one was watching, he leaned in and we kissed lightly. It was like shaking hands on our deal, but better.
Scorpius entered the great hall first, then after a small space of time, I followed him so we wouldn't look suspicious. I went over to the Gryffindor table and sat between Hugo and James who were both stuffing their faces with eggs and toast.
"Rosie! We were wondering where you'd gone off to!" James exclaimed, bits of eggs flying out of his mouth.
"That was some homework question." Albus commented. I couldn't tell what he was thinking.
"Oh, I took a walk before I came back." I said casually. I reached for some breakfast trying not to look guilty of anything. Dominique was eyeing me suspiciously and I knew she would be asking me all sorts of questions later in the dorms.
"Well you probably want to brush your hair a bit, it looks messy." Hugo supplied. "No offense." He added as an afterthought.
I quickly ran my fingers through my hair, trying to pass it off that the wind was responsible. Glancing at Scorpius at the Slytherin table across from me, I saw him smirking. I smiled, knowing he would be getting more than a talking to later.
A/N: I have been stuck on this chapter for soo long! But it's finally out and all the tension building up has been released! I actually felt pretty dirty writing this ;) haha but I'm happy with how it turned out! Please leave a review and if you'd like, take a few guesses at what will happen next! I've got some twists and turns for this story :D
~yours in eternity