Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin. I wish I did—I really, really wish I did—but I don't, so.
Go To Sleep
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"Arthur? Are you still awake?" Merlin asked, whispering against the chance that he, in fact, was not. It was late, and it had been something like hours since they laid down to go to sleep, but Merlin was still up, his mind was still racing, nerves still on edge. He didn't know if he would ever sleep again, actually, the way he was feeling at the moment: excited and nervous and giddy and scared all at once.
"Yes." Arthur said back, his voice rough as he shifted slightly in their bed to look over at Merlin.
Merlin smiled to himself, glad to know he wasn't the only one who might have been kept awake that night by thoughts and worries. "Are you… nervous about tomorrow?" He asked.
"Not as nervous as you are." Arthur teased sleepily.
Merlin smiled again despite himself, knowing the truth in Arthur's words when he recognized it. It was going to be a big day—one of the biggest of their lives, actually. Bigger, almost, than their wedding had been—and that had been a pretty big day, if Merlin did say so himself. But that had been nothing, really; half the kingdom had already considered the pair of them as good as married, they had just done the wedding to make it official, to do things "properly" between the pair of them. Everyone had known long before the wedding the depth of their feelings for one another, but this—this was bigger than that had been.
He sat up slightly, leaning over Arthur in half an instant just because he could. "Do you… how do you think the people will—"
"It's not going to change the way people see you, Merlin." Arthur interrupted quickly, reaching up with the hand not tucked behind his head to grab one of Merlin's hands and kiss it tenderly, reassuringly.
"Won't it, though? These people—your people, my people—they… they're used to me as Merlin, the king's consort, his husband, his best friend, his old servant, they feel as though they know me by now—if we come out and say that I have magic, that I'm the greatest sorcerer to ever walk the earth… won't they feel lied to? Betrayed?"
"They'll understand." Arthur assured him, probably catching the hint of panic in his voice, the hesitance that was growing in him the closer they came to sun-up, because would it really be the worst thing in the world, Merlin was beginning to wonder to himself, if the people just never knew? They had already kept it to themselves this long, how much harder would it be to just keep it to themselves for say, the rest of their lives? "They know about the laws, know what would have happened to you if you had come out with this before I changed them, and they'll understand."
"But—"
"The knights understood, didn't they?"
"Yes, but they're—"
"The court understood, didn't they?"
"Well, most of them—"
"And the ones that didn't have been replaced."
"You can't replace your people, Arthur."
"I won't need to. They love you, Merlin." Arthur's eyes hardened in that moment, with something like determination as he tried to make Merlin understand. "Just like I do. And nothing will ever change that. Not magic, not anything. They'll still love you even after we've made the announcement, I promise you that."
"And what if they don't?" Merlin asked, exasperated.
Arthur sighed and sat up, leaned against the wall and gently tugged Merlin to rest against his chest, wrapped his arms around him, kissed the top of his head. "Then we'll figure things out as we come to them."
"But—"
"No 'buts', Merlin." Arthur chastised, tightening his grip. "Now go to sleep. Tomorrow is a big day, and we both need our rest. All right?"
Merlin sighed against him, relaxing, melting under his embrace, against his chest. Perhaps Arthur was right, perhaps he was just worrying over nothing, perhaps everything would be fine.
"All right." Merlin mumbled in response, his eyes slipping closed. "All right. Love you."
"I know." Arthur chuckled.
Merlin scowled against his bare skin. "You're supposed to say it back, you prat."
"Yeah."
Merlin grinned, shook his head, settling further into Arthur's embrace as he let himself relax, trying to let his worries melt away and give himself over to slumber. Whatever morning brought, whatever happened the next day… He had to believe it would all be okay—if Arthur thought it would be okay, if he was sure the people would accept Merlin…
Then Merlin had to believe it, too.
"I love you." Arthur whispered into Merlin's hair a moment before he drifted off, a warm kiss placed against his hairline all the further reassurance he would need on the subject. Everything would be all right, simply because Arthur loved Merlin and he believed it would be.
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