I'm baaaaaaack. Or more correctly, I should say we're back to The Roads Series. I apologize - it was never my intent to make you all wait 10 weeks for the next chapters... I am sooooooooooooo sorry. But at the same time - I'm glad you enjoyed 'Sleight of Hand', 'A Joy Shared is a Joy Doubled', and 'Like a Duck to Water'.
I don't own Criminal Minds. Never did - never will. Yes, the truth can be bitter.
Thanks to my wonderful beta - DetectiveNikkiBenson040709. Thanks to all of you for being such loyal fans. Without further adieu, on with the story - which what all clicked on the link for in the first place, not my crazy ramblings. :D
Happy reading and enjoy :D
JJ took a deep breath. She'd dropped Henry off at day care. Now that the holidays were over, the reality of her old life was settling in around her, but with the added comfort of Spence being a part of it now as more than just her best friend. However, with the reality setting in around her, she knew she needed to put the life that had been but a dream, behind her and to rest. She'd had an epiphany about just how to do that while driving to work. She called her assistant Jamie and let her know that she would be in late this morning.
She clenched the steering wheel of her car as she prepared to make peace with the life she left behind in the other reality. It wasn't so much that it was a painful thought anymore, but the fact of the matter was that she needed closure. She thought perhaps the best way to get that was by saying goodbye to one of largest missing pieces of that life, other than Chloe and the baby. JJ took another deep breath and stepped out of the car, pausing for a moment to reach in and grab the bouquet of Gerber Daisies, which had of course been Rebecca's favorite flower.
She clutched the cheerfully colorful bunch of white, yellow, and hot pink flowers as she crossed the grassy expanse of the cemetery and came to a stop in front of a headstone marked 'Rebecca Garner Bryant August 10 1987 – May 16 2006 Step softly, a dream lies buried here'. She wiped a tear from her eye as the reality of never seeing her 'adopted younger sister' again sunk in. Then she knelt placing the flowers in a vase as the corner of Rebecca's headstone.
She smiled softly through her tears and brushed her fingers across Rebecca's name where it was etched in stone. "Hey Bec… I… I'm going to miss you. I…Spence and I always meant it when we told you we thought of you as a younger sister… I just wanted you to know that and to have a chance to say goodbye. I'm sorry that we couldn't save you in this life… but who knows, maybe you have Chloe, Jason, and Josh to keep you company."
JJ reached up and wiped away the tears that were coursing down her face. "If they are with you… could tell them I love them?" JJ sobbed briefly and wiped away more tears. "I'll never forget you Rebecca. Thank you for having been a part of our family." JJ sighed and gave the headstone one last lingering look as she remember the last image she had of 22 year old Rebecca laughing and smiling at the Christmas party.
Then she turned and walked away knowing there was one final thing she needed to check on when she got to the office… and then she could completely let go of the life she'd known up until waking up with Spence and Henry on her couch just over three weeks ago.
JJ stared at the computer in front of her in frustration. The last thing that she needed to do to make peace with being back in her old life was to make sure Seth was okay. Unfortunately, she didn't even have the slightest clue where to start. And then her cell phone rang.
"Jareau" she spoke into the phone, chewing on her lip as she stared at the screen about foster care child placement in the state of Florida and tried to make heads or tails of just how she could track down Seth and if the baby boy was okay. That was all that she needed to know – that he was safe, well cared for, and with a good family.
"Peaches how are you? I'm sorry we couldn't get together over the holidays… but Kevie and I went to his parents." The bright chipper voice of Penelope Garcia came over the phone.
"Pen" JJ responded cheerfully, her face lighting up at hearing from one of her dearest friends. "It's okay, although Henry missed his Auntie Penelope."
"Aww, he is a smart boy isn't he?" Penelope cooed. "So, are we on for breakfast tomorrow?"
JJ smiled and shook her head. "Well the craziness of the holidays is over and it is Tuesday after all. How about if we get together a little bit earlier than normal and I drop Henry off at day care after we have breakfast?"
"Sounds like music to my ears Jayje. I haven't seen my favorite little cutie in what feels like forever." Penelope squealed.
JJ smiled as she pulled her phone away from her ear just a bit for the safety of her eardrum. Then she realized that instead of beating her head into her desk trying to figure out how to track down Seth and make sure that he was okay she should just ask the all-powerful tech goddess supreme for her help. "Hey Pen, I was wondering if you could help me out with something…" JJ said as she exited the scene on her computer and continued her conversation with Pen.
"Oh" Penelope gasped as she walked quickly through the café towards where JJ and Henry sat at a table waiting for her. "There's my baby boy!"
"Aun' 'lelope!" Henry shrieked gleefully at the sight of his godmother.
"Hello sweetie, how are you?" Penelope asked as she bent down and kissed the small blonde haired boy on the cheek causing him to giggle.
"I good" Henry replied as he swung his legs in the high chair. "Mama we have fwench toas?"
"Sure baby we can have French toast if that's what you want." JJ said as she looked at Henry.
"Uh huh I wan' fwench toas'" Henry repeated happily as he continued to swing his legs.
"Well someone is decisive this morning." Penelope chirped cheerfully. "Hey Jayje. It's so good to see you. It feels like it's been forever." Penelope said as she leaned in and gave her best friend a hug.
"Hey Pen" JJ said as she returned the hug. "I guess it has been what, about a month?"
"Yes, yes it has." Penelope said as she sat down, setting her purse in the chair next to her. "I was able to find what you asked for." She said as she handed a closed manila envelope across the table to JJ, "but do you want to tell me why I was looking up an orphaned baby from a case that was almost nine months ago?"
JJ sighed. "I just… don't you ever find yourself wondering if anyone in a case got a happy ending?"
"Of course I do… all the time." Penelope responded.
JJ nodded. "Well, I just… with the holidays… I just needed to know. I found myself wondering what happened to that baby boy."
Penelope nodded in understanding. "Well, you'll be happy to know that Seth, that's the baby's name by the way, is healthy and he was just placed with a really great family a couple of months ago. He had a bit of a rocky start…" Penelope explained as she went into all the details JJ already knew about the first six months of Seth's life. "… but after all of that things turned around for him in the last couple of months. Another couple stepped forward to foster him and they just filed the paperwork last week to adopt him."
JJ nodded. She could rest easy now, knowing that Seth was safe and loved. She and Penelope chit chatted while Henry continued to be his normal adorable self while they waited for their server to bring breakfast.
"How's your French toast cutie?" Penelope asked Henry with a smile on her face as she looked at the sticky mess that was her godson.
"Good" Henry replied as he continued to dunk the last of the bite size chunks of French toast that Mommy had cut up for him into the syrup. "Aww dun" Henry said as he looked at Mommy with a cheeky grin on his sticky little face.
JJ smiled. "I see that baby boy. Do you want anymore?"
Henry shook his head no.
"Do you want some more juice?" JJ asked as she held out Henry's glass of apple juice to him.
Henry took the glass from Mommy and drank down the rest of his juice and then sat the glass carefully back on the table.
"'ticky Mama" Henry said as he shook his hands.
JJ laughed. "Well how about we get you all cleaned up then?" she turned and pulled a container of wet wipes out of Henry's bag that sat on the chair next to her. Just then her cell phone rang. "Just a second Henry, Mommy has to answer the phone, okay?"
"It's okay Jayje. I'll clean up our little gentleman." Penelope said reaching out for the container of wet wipes.
"Thanks Pen." JJ said turning and picking her phone up off the table. "Jareau"
Penelope smiled at the sticky blond boy in the high chair. She reached out and moved the sticky syrup covered plate and glass away from Henry and then she pulled out a wet wipe and set about cleaning up her sticky syrup covered godson.
"Aun' lelope?" Henry asked once he was all clean.
"Yes gumdrop?"
"You tome over an pway wit me an Mama an Unca 'pence?" Henry asked just as JJ was hanging up the phone.
JJ held her breath, not knowing what Henry was going to say next, not that it mattered. She didn't want to keep her and Spence a secret this time around. However, she'd prefer she and Spence tell their friends themselves instead of being outed by her two year old son.
"You want me to come over and play with you, Mommy, and Uncle Spencer?" Penelope repeated.
Henry nodded.
"Oh sweet boy, I would love too. That sounds like a lot of fun." Penelope asked as she glanced up at JJ.
JJ smiled and nodded. "It does. How about it we talk later this week to set something up? Right now, Henry and I have to get going.'' JJ said as she scooped Henry out of the high chair and settled him on her hip.
"Sure that sounds like a plan. You know I'm sure Reid and I could babysit if you and Daddy wanted to take a night off and maybe go on a date." Penelope said with a wink.
Henry perked up at the mention of Daddy. "Dada no home. He in new… new… Mama where Dada adain?"
"New Orleans baby. Daddy is in New Orleans." JJ sighed.
"Yeah dere. I talk a him on da phone wots dough" Henry said looking back at Aunt Penelope and bobbing his head.
"For how long?" Penelope asked.
"I don't know." JJ replied with emotionlessly. She wasn't heartbroken over her breakup with Will, but that still didn't mean she wanted to talk about it around Henry.
"Peaches?" Penelope asked in a concerned tone.
"Can we talk about it later Pen? Please?" JJ asked pointedly glancing down at Henry. "I tell you everything… just now right now."
"Okay… you're okay though right?" Penelope asked softly.
"More than okay Pen… so much more than okay. I promise." JJ replied as they walked out of the café and across the parking lot. JJ turned to face Penelope in between their cars. "Can you give Auntie Penelope a hug and a kiss goodbye Henry?" JJ asked.
Henry nodded and turned in Mommy's arms to reach for his godmother. "Bye-bye Aun' 'lelope" Henry said cheerfully as he wrapped his arms around his Aunt Penelope's neck and gave her a loud messy two year old smooch on the cheek.
"Oh cutie." Penelope sighed as she hugged Henry back. "I'll see you soon for our play date okay?" she asked as she kissed him on the forehead.
Henry nodded.
"And you peaches… promise me we'll talk soon?" Penelope asked. It was killing her not to interrogate her best friend right now, but at the same time she understood that JJ didn't want to talk about whatever it was in front of Henry.
"Of course we will. I know you better than to think I could escape." JJ teased with a laugh as she hugged Pen.
"You better believe it." Pen replied and then watched as JJ strapped and harnessed Henry into his car seat and then climbed in herself. Pen stood watching and waved as JJ and Henry pulled out of the parking lot. Then she climbed into Esther and headed for the BAU.
JJ smiled as she heard the door close and Spence's light footsteps come into the kitchen where she was making dinner while Henry sat in his booster seat playing with his blocks at the table.
Henry too noticed the footsteps and looked up. "Hi Unca' 'Pence!" he greeted cheerfully, if a bit noisily.
"Hi Henry" Spence said wincing just slightly at the light in the kitchen, wishing there was a way he could have worn his sunglasses in the house and not have made it obvious that something was wrong.
JJ smiled watching Henry greet Spence, and then she noticed the face Spence made as she turned around, drying her hands on a dishtowel. "Hey, are you okay?" she asked in a concerned voice as she walked over to Spence and leaned up to kiss him hello.
"Yeah… I just… long day." Spence murmured against JJ's lips as she pulled away. He closed his eyes for moment and rested his forehead against hers. He'd had a constant and persistent headache for the last two days. It wasn't the first time it had happened, but he'd finally broken down today and scheduled an appointment for first thing in the morning. He didn't want to worry JJ until after he had some idea of what was wrong.
JJ nodded ever so slightly and tipped her head, kissing him again. "Why don't you and Henry go put his blocks away and then wash up? Dinner's almost ready."
Spence nodded and blinked as she stepped away from JJ and towards Henry. "Come on big guy. Mommy says dinner's almost ready. We have to put your blocks away and wash our hands."
"Nigh' nigh' Unca 'Pence" Henry said as Uncle Spence sat him down on his big boy bed.
"Goodnight Henry" Spence leaning down and kissing Henry on the top of the head.
JJ smiled as she watched godfather and godson interact with each other. She sat down as Spence headed for the door of Henry's bedroom. She smiled at him as he glanced back over his shoulder, then she turned to Henry. Are you ready for our story baby?"
"Uh huh" Henry nodded eagerly as Mommy sat next to him and opened the book they read every night at bedtime. As Mommy read, he struggled to keep his eyes open and eventually lost the battle as his eyes slid shut to peaceful dreams.
"…I'll love you forever, because you're always my baby star." JJ said softly as she finished the book and glanced down next to her, smiling at the sight of her baby boy sound asleep.
"Hey, tired?" JJ asked as she closed the bedroom door behind her and turned to find Spence lying on the bed in his pajamas with an arm slung over his eyes.
Spence nodded. His head was throbbing right now and it hurt to even have his eyes open.
JJ opened the dresser drawer and pulled out her pajamas. She paused next to Spence and leaned down to kiss him. "I'm just going to change into my pajamas and then we can call it a night." She leaned down and kissed him softly.
"Okay" Spence replied softly as JJ pulled away. He peeked out from underneath his arm to watch JJ walk into the bathroom and then instantly regretted it, wincing as he covered his eyes again with his arm.
JJ quickly prepared for bed and then turned off the lights in the bathroom except for the newly acquired nightlight. She made her way across the bedroom, pausing to turn off the light, and then she crawled into bed next to Spence and cuddled up next to him.
Spence sighed in relief in the now dark room and lowered his arm from his face to wrap it around JJ, holding her close to his side.
JJ ran her hand across Spence's belly and chest. "So, I had lunch with Pen today."
"Yeah?" Spence asked shifting to be able to look down at JJ.
"Yeah… Henry asked her to come over and play. It was really cute… but the subject of Will being in New Orleans came up… and well what would you think about inviting the team over this weekend so that we can tell them about us?" JJ bit her lip as she watched Spence's darkened profile.
Spence smiled at the thought of telling everyone that after all these years he and JJ were together. "I think it's a great idea."
JJ smiled and stretched up to kiss Spence. "Okay. I call everybody and get it set up." She said as she pulled away from his lips and snuggled into his side, her forehead resting against his shoulder.
"JJ?" Spence whispered.
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
"I love you too Spence."
Then they snuggled into each other's arms and fell asleep.
Spence stared at the wall of the shower in his apartment as the hot water poured over him. His headaches couldn't be psychosomatic… they just couldn't. There had to be something physical causing them… there just had to.
Spence tipped his head back and ran his hands over his face. He was scared. He'd hoped that the doctor's appointment would clear up the mystery of what exactly was the cause of his headaches. Instead it just made him more concerned and terrified.
He sighed deeply and reached down to turn off the water and grabbed a towel. He needed to get dressed and head over to JJ's. The rest of the team would be there soon; he'd just stopped at home to shower and change. He also knew that he'd been much too upset when he left the hospital to head straight to JJ's.
"Hey you" JJ said looking up at Spence as he came in the front door.
"Hey JJ" He said as he paused to hang his coat up in the closet and then joined her on the couch. "Hi Henry"
Henry turned and looked at Uncle Spence and waved. "Hi" Then he turned back to the paper he was coloring on.
Spence turned to look at JJ.
"He's making a picture for you." JJ said with a smile.
"Oh" Spence replied. "So… do you need my help with anything?"
JJ smiled and leaned up and kissed Spence. "No, everything is ready, but thank you for asking." She kissed him again and then turned to watch Henry again. Then the doorbell rang and JJ stood up from the couch to answer the door.
She smiled as she peeked out the peep hole to see the team all crowded together on her front doorstep. She might not still be a part of the team, but it was nice to know that if she ever needed them, they would be there.
She opened the door. "Hey guys, you can hang your coats in the closet" she said as the team began to troop in the front door.
"Here, I brought these. I thought they might come in handy." Emily said with a smile as she handed JJ a couple of bottles of wine.
"Thanks Em" JJ replied with a smile and then she noticed Jack standing close to Hotch and leaning back against his legs. "Hey Jack" she said crouching down to the five year old's height. "Henry is really excited for you guys to be able to play together. It's all he's been talking about all day."
"Daddy, can I go play with Henry?" Jack asked tipping his head back to look at his Dad.
"Sure buddy. I bet Henry would love to see all the superheroes you brought with. Just remember he's littler than you, okay?" Hotch gently reminded.
Jack nodded and trotted off to join Henry in the living room.
JJ turned to watch as Jack headed for the living room. Most of the team turned to watch as well, and were met with the endearing sight of Reid sitting on the floor talking to Henry, their heads bowed together over the coffee table as Henry pointed to something on the table while Reid nodded and asked questions.
Penelope was the only person who hadn't been watching the scene between Reid and the boys in the living room. She'd been watching JJ's face, attempting to discern what was going on with her friend. She'd expect JJ to be sadder if she and Will were having problems or worse, if they were breaking up. She was perplexed. She sighed, and then she too turned to watch the scene in the living room.
"Hey Jack" Spence greeted the young boy when he reached them in the living room.
"Hi" Jack replied, if a bit shyly.
"Henry do you remember Jack? Can you say hi? He came over to play with you tonight." Spence explained to Henry.
Henry turned and looked at Jack, studying the older boy. "Hi Jack!" he said excited to play with the older boy.
Jack smiled and sat down next to Henry. "Hi Henry. I brought superheroes. Do you want to play with them with me?" Jack asked as he opened his small backpack.
Spence smiled as he watched the two boys make fast friends as Jack started to explain who all of the superheroes were, from Superman to Captain America and everything in between. As Jack handed Henry a Spiderman figure, Spence stood up and moved to join the adults.
"Hey guys" Reid brushing off his khakis as he joined everyone gathered in the entry way.
"Well, I'm going to go put these in the kitchen" JJ said holding up the bottles of wine. "Can I get anybody anything to drink?"
JJ nodded at the slew of drink requests and headed for the kitchen with Emily and Penelope in tow to help her.
"So you sure beat feet out of the office in a hurry today youngster." Morgan said as the guys conversed.
"Yeah… I…." Reid started to say but was interrupted by the girls bringing back drinks for everyone.
"So… you said you had news for everyone?" Emily asked with a quirk of her eyebrow as she looked at JJ.
JJ nodded as she swallowed her sip of wine and then cleared her throat. "You probably already noticed that Will isn't here."
Morgan tensed up wondering if he would need to beat the living daylights out of Will for being an ass.
Rossi stared intently waiting for whatever came next.
Hotch closed his eyes momentarily, afraid that he was about to find out that JJ's relationship had also become a casualty of the BAU, that her leaving to go to the Pentagon had been too little too late.
Emily's eyes rose on her forehead, unsure what JJ bringing up the obvious implied.
Penelope was chomping at the bit to find out just what had happened between her fair maiden friend and her southern gentleman prince charming. "You said he was in New Orleans… what's going on JJ?"
JJ swallowed again. "Will and I split up… a while ago actually. We realized that we didn't work as a couple. We decided that it would be best for Henry if we remained friends and parted amicably now instead of continuing to try and force it and ending up bitter and angry later. He's spending some time in New Orleans figuring out what he wants to do now." JJ breathed a sigh of relief that half of her news was out of the bag.
"Oh... Jayje" Penelope sighed mournfully at the end of her friend's relationship.
JJ shook her head. "That isn't why I asked you all to come over tonight. This isn't a pity party. I have happy news. I've been seeing someone for the last month. He makes me very happy… and to be honest we should have been together years ago." JJ explained as she slid her hand into Spence's where he stood next to her and squeezed.
"Is he going to meet with our approval? Why didn't you have me run a background check on him? Why isn't he here tonight?" Penelope spouted of eagerly.
"Baby girl" Morgan said wrapping his arm around Penelope's shoulder to get her attention. "I think he is here… and that you will definitely approve." Morgan said with a smirk and a chuckle as he nodded at where JJ's hand was clasped in Reid's. "I guess now I know why you were in such a rush to get out of the office today pretty boy." Morgan said teasingly in his big brother tone of voice.
"Jayje! Oh my god… oh my god…. Oh my god! You and the junior G-man!" Penelope squealed as she rushed forward and wrapped JJ and Reid in a crushing hug.
Everybody else looked on with a smile as they all remembered the first time they'd noticed the chemistry between JJ and Reid.
Hotch remembered all the time his two youngest agents had spent together during the aftermath of Boston. It was hard to believe that was only just over six years ago. Somehow JJ and Reid together just seemed right, even if it took them almost six years to get here.
Morgan grinned as watched his pseudo little brother squirm in Penelope's grasp. He remembered teasing Reid about his thing for JJ hoping that it would push him to actually go after what he wanted. He'd never been able to pry what exactly happened at their football game date out of Reid. Reid had declared it 'Top Secret' and refused to talk about it.
Emily smiled, but guiltily wondered if this day would have come sooner if she hadn't pushed JJ towards the 'something fun to look at' in Miami. If she hadn't told JJ to go for it, would she have? Would she have gotten together with Reid sooner? Well there was no point in asking now; the important thing was they were together now. She smiled as she watched Penelope's enthusiasm over their friends getting together after all this time.
Rossi smiled over the rim as he sipped from his drink. He spent so much time profiling each of the team members when he first joined the team. He'd noticed right away the attraction between the two agents. Hell he'd expected them to get together any day with all of the looks and hidden glances shared between them. Then had come the surprise of finding out JJ was pregnant after that god awful case in New York. He still wasn't sure Aaron had recovered yet from losing Kate like that. He mused as he glanced sideways at his best friend. It had to be a hell of a thing to be dating someone, lose them to a bomber and then not a year and a half later lose the love of your life, your ex-wife, to another unsub. No wonder Aaron hadn't put himself back out there yet.
After more teasing and friendly banter over a family style dinner around JJ's seldom used dining room table, the team broke into smaller groups. Penelope and Emily had shooed Reid out of the kitchen when he tried to help JJ clean up. They were determined to have girl time and learn all of the details that they could pry out of JJ.
The guys sat in the living room watching Henry and Jack play together. Rossi and Hotch chuckled as Morgan continued to tease Reid and Reid on his part, continued to blush.
"So pretty boy's got a pretty girl… " Morgan said leaning back and shaking his head as he took a sip of his beer. "That's why..."
Whatever Morgan was going to say next was cut off by a very loud "HE WHAT?" coming from the kitchen in JJ's voice.
"JJ, I'm sorry." Emily said as she reached out rubbing her friend's shoulder. "I thought Reid would have already told you about the case JJ… I'm so sorry."
JJ took a deep breath trying to calm down from hearing about Spence having walked in to a crime scene without his bullet proof vest on and basically turning himself over to the unsub. "It's okay Em. To be fair, Spence got here just a few minutes before all of you… and he probably didn't want to bring it up when he knew you guys were coming over tonight."
"You know… I think it's time I got Jack home and to bed. It's getting late." Hotch said making a show of glancing at his watch. "Jack, buddy, time to pack it up. We need to get home and go to bed."
"Okay Daddy" Jack sighed and then he and Henry started to pick up their toys and put them away as they rubbed their eyes tiredly.
Rossi nodded. "Yeah… I bet Mudgie would really like a walk and some attention seeing as I've been away most of this week." Rossi said as he stood up and headed for the door.
Hotch and Jack followed him after quick goodbyes with Reid and Henry. "Reid, tell JJ I said thanks… and I'll see you at work on Monday" Hotch said as he turned and headed for the door. 'If JJ lets you live until then.' He muttered under his breath as he pulled his and Jack's coat from the closet.
Morgan winced. No way in hell did he want to stick around and see this show… plus he was pretty sure that if pretty boy was going to get read the riot act, that he'd at least want it to be without an audience. "Yeah…you're on your own kid… "Morgan said standing up and walking to the closet and pulling out his leather jacket. "Just make sure you listen to her pretty boy… really listen to her." He said as he slid his arms into his leather coat. "I'll see you on Monday Reid."
Spence looked around the living room in confusion as to why all of the guys had suddenly left. Then he looked back at Henry who was rubbing his eyes. "Hey are you sleepy Henry?"
Henry nodded his head as he continued to rub his eyes.
Spence stood up and scooped up Henry. "What do you say we go find Mommy and then get ready for bed?"
Henry nodded and laid his head on Uncle Spence's shoulder and cuddled up against him as Uncle Spence walked to the kitchen.
JJ stood leaning against the kitchen counter, pinching the bridge of her nose as she attempted to calm down. Her head lifted and the anger at Spence taking unnecessary risks refreshed itself when she saw Spence standing there with an almost asleep Henry in his arms.
Emily and Penelope glanced cautiously back and forth between JJ and Reid in concern. Then Penelope stepped towards Reid. "Tell you what gorgeous gray matter, why don't you give me my favorite little cutie and Emily the strange and great and I will go get him ready for bed." She said as she lifted Henry out of Reid's arms and cradled her godson against her chest.
"Aun' lelope" Henry said in a sleepy voice, "I sweepy"
"I know cutie. Aunt Emily and I are going to get you ready for bed right now okay?" Penelope cooed as she kissed the top of his head and headed out the door of the kitchen.
Emily paused and glanced back at JJ. Then she reached out and rubbed her hand up and down Reid's arm briefly. She didn't know what was going on with her genius friend, but hopefully in light of his new relationship with JJ, he'd tell her whatever it was that he wasn't telling, and wouldn't tell, the rest of the team. Then she turned to catch up with Penelope and Henry.
JJ stood watching Spence silently for a few moments, leaning back against the kitchen counter with her arms crossed as she tried to find the words. "What the hell were you thinking Spence?" JJ finally managed to get out in a terse voice.
"I… what?" Spence asked in confusion.
"Emily told me about what happened in Miami." JJ bit out.
"Oh" Spence replied as he shuffled his feet and stuffed his hands in his pocket.
"Oh… that's all you can say is oh?" JJ ranted as she stood up from leaning on the counter. "Damn it Spence… did you even stop to think about what could have happened?" she asked as she stepped forward into his personal space and poked him in the chest.
"JJ… I…" Spence attempted to reply his hands coming up out of his pockets defensively.
"Don't JJ me." JJ said as they turned and Spence was backing up against the kitchen counter as JJ advanced on him. "Did you or did you not think about what could happen by approaching an unsub alone… and not just alone, but without your vest?" JJ yelled.
Spence winced at the throbbing that JJ yelling induced in his head. Damn it. He'd been doing so well tonight, and now the headache was back again.
"Spence" JJ sighed as she felt the anger leave her "It's not just about you anymore. I couldn't bear it if I lost you. I love you… just promise me that you'll be more careful from now on… Spence? Baby what's wrong?" she asked as she stepped between his legs and took in the expression of intense pain on his face with his eyes squinted tightly shut and the fingertips of one hand rubbing the center of his forehead.
"Baby, talk to me." JJ said as she wrapped one arm around his waist and lifted her other hand to cup his cheek, her thumb rubbing across his cheek bone. "You're scaring me."
Spence wrapped his free arm low around JJ's waist and held on for dear life as he tried to will away his headache and ride out the pain. Then he realized that JJ was right. It wasn't just about him anymore. There was JJ and Henry to consider… and JJ needed to know what she could be getting into. She deserved to be able to make an informed decision. If she walked away it was going to hurt… but he would understand, after all she had Henry to think about. "I've been having headaches… really, really bad headaches. Sometimes they last for days." Spence began.
JJ's face twitched in concern. "We need to get you in to see the doctor… have you made an appointment?"
Spence cleared his throat. "I… um had a doctor's appointment earlier this week… right before we left for Miami actually. They did an MRI… I got the results this afternoon." Spence said regretfully.
"And?" JJ asked asshe lowered her hand from Spence's face and rested it against his chest, unconsciously rubbing soothing circles above his heart.
Spence swallowed and took a deep breath. "There isn't anything physically wrong… at least not according to what they were able to find on the MRI. The doctor suggested that it was stress… or possibly psychosomatic…" Spence said trailing off.
"Okay well the fact that there isn't anything physically wrong… that's good right?" JJ asked.
Spence shook his head. "JJ… you don't understand… my Mom… she would have headaches at the beginning of an episode when I was a kid. She… she would close all of the blinds in her bedroom and curl up in bed for days… JJ… I… what if…"
JJ swallowed thickly as she realized what exactly about the doctor's diagnosis was bothering Spence. If the headaches had a physical cause there was something to fight… something to fix. If it was psychosomatic… then he could be fighting his own mind. She wrapped her arms tightly around Spence and buried her face in his neck. "It's going to be okay baby. We'll get through this together. The doctor's probably right… it's probably just stress." JJ murmured into his ear. "It's going to be okay, you'll see." She whispered and then buried her face back in Spence's neck.
Spence buried his face in JJ's blond locks and let tears of relief fall. At least he wasn't losing JJ. He'd told her that his worst fear might be coming true and she hadn't walked away. She told him that they'd get through this together.
That was exactly how Emily and Penelope found them a short while later when they came down from putting Henry to bed.