Day 08: Shopping

Title: Baby Moose

Summary: When Sam gets de-aged by a particularly bitchy witch, Dean and Castiel must band together and face a gruesome threat: a shopping mall.

Notes: Sorry if this kinda sucks. I had real trouble working with this prompt.

Castiel regarded the toddler with curiosity while Dean just continued to stare at it in horror.

"Please tell me you can change him back." Dean pleaded, tearing his gaze off of his little brother to look hopefully at the angel. Cas didn't respond and just took a step towards the toddler, reaching a hand out to press a finger to Sam's head. But before it could land on the toddler, Sammy seized the finger in his chubby hands and squeezed it, giggling as the angel furrowed his brow and tilted his head.

"Is this some form of communication?" Cas asked, eyes trained on Sam's face as if the toddler could answer.

Sammy just grinned toothily at him as he reached out and smacked the angel in the face. Dean had to suppress the strong urge to laugh as Castiel pulled back and looked at Dean with a confused, slightly hurt expression, "I believe I have angered him."

Dean cleared his throat to cover the chuckle that bubbled in his throat as he answered, "No, Cas. That's just how little kids are. You can't talk to them like you would an adult."

"Then how else would I talk to them?" Cas asked.

Dean sighed exasperatedly and fought off a shudder (because hey, he was kinda freaked out to see Sam this young again) as he knelt down and put on his stern, big brother voice that he'd perfected over the course of their childhood, "Sammy, you don't hit, alright? Now stop being rude and let Cas figure out if he can fix you."

"Dee!" Sam responded gleefully, thrusting his hands up as they scrambled for purchase. Thankfully, Dean slid of reach just in time before the toddler could grasp his jacket.

"Go on," Dean told Cas, motioning to Sam, "I'm already going to have a month of nightmares because of this."

Cas stepped forward again and pressed a finger to Sam's forehead, his blue eyes closing shut as his face masked concentration. Finally, just when Dean was about to start pacing like an overbearing mother hen, Cas leaned back and opened his eyes, glancing at Dean with an apologetic expression that did not soothe the worry that boiled in the hunter's stomach, "Your witch was not a weak one. With her years of manifested power and my own dwindling abilities, I cannot exorcise the magic out of Sam's system. I'm sorry, Dean."

Dean let out a frustrated scoff and ran a hand through his hair, "That's just great. So how are we supposed to stop the apocalypse with a baby moose?"

"He will not remain in this state forever," Cas informed him, causing a sigh of relief to slip passed Dean's lips, "We just have to wait until the magic naturally drains from his body."

He arched an eyebrow, "How long will that take?"

Cas sighed, shrugging, "By the power of the magic, I'd say a week. Perhaps two."

"Awesome," Dean said sarcastically, rubbing a hand over his face, "You know, I haven't dealt with Sam this young in over a decade."

"I will help you." Cas declared, causing Dean to roll his eyes.

"Yeah, because you're Mr. Mom." He scoffed before his gaze switched to Sammy, who was practically drowning in adult-Sam's huge plaid shirt and jeans, "If he's gonna be like this for awhile, we need to stock up on some baby supplies."

"And how do you suggest we do that?" The angel inquired.

"We go shopping." Dean answered simply, lifting Sam off the mattress. When he caught sight of the puddle of damp liquid in the spot where the toddler was sitting, he looked over to Cas, cocking an eyebrow, "Is that the magic?"

Castiel leaned forward and studied it for a moment before finally announcing, "No, that is urine."

Dean glared at Sam, who just smiled brightly and wrapped his arms around his neck, saying in his young, upbeat voice, "Dee!"

"Well, who would've guessed," He muttered mostly to himself, rummaging through Sam's clothes to find a shirt suitable for a temporary diaper, "You're a bitch even in miniature form."

Dean was nothing if not resourceful. He fashioned a diaper out of Sam's favorite shirt (because he was a little shit and Dean felt just a little spiteful about this whole thing) and disguised a motel bed sheet as a shirt. Sure, it wasn't the most stylish attire, but it was the best he could do at such short notice.

"First of all, we need to get him some diapers and awesome clothes, okay?" Dean said to the angel as they strolled through the mall, his green eyes searching for a suitable clothing store, "And none of that Baby Gap shit."

Sam squirmed in Dean's arms, the excitement in his surroundings finally stirring the toddler out of his brief slumber, "Down!"

"You forget that I know you, Sammy," Dean said, smirking at Sam's pissy expression, "I know from experience that as soon as I put you down, you're gonna run as fast as you can away from us."

Sam shot him a dirty look before he look at Cas with puppy dog eyes, sticking out his lip as he reached his arms out for the angel. To Sam's disappointment, Castiel seemed more bewildered than swooned at his cute charade.

Dean chuckled at the expression of defeat on the toddler's face before he immediately went back to business, "Okay, Cas, your job is to find diapers while I try to find some suitable clothes for the little bitch."

"Diapers," The angel repeated slowly, furrowing his brow as he added, "Dean...where does one acquire diapers?"

Dean grinned cheekily at him and patted his cheek, "That's your job to find out, Cas." And with that, he walked away from the angel, smirking to himself as he felt a pair of wide blue eyes follow him until he disappeared out of sight.

"Wow, Sam, this is the best you've ever dressed." Dean said with a smirk as he and a newly clothed Sam left the store, packing out two weeks' worth of outfits with them. Sam frowned as he glanced down at his baggy AC/DC shirt and cargo shorts (though he still had his shirt diaper on, which was still clean and dry—much to Dean's displeasure).

"Shut up," Dean said, grinning as Sammy glared at him, "You look awesome. Hell, you might even pick up some chicks with that shirt."

As if right on cue, he heard a rich, velvety female's voice crow behind them, "Oh he's so adorable."

Please be hot, please be hot, Dean silently prayed and his heart did a little happy dance once he turned around and discovered she was an easy eight on the hotness scale.

Dean gave her a smile, glancing down at Sam, "Yeah, he's something, alright."

The woman smiled back at him, but her main focus was on Sam, stroking his hair as he fruitlessly tried to squirm away, "He's such a cutie. Is he yours?"

Dean wracked his brain for an answer that would potentially get him laid in the nearest future, "Well, uh—not exactly." Smooth, Dean.

The woman gave him a puzzled look before her eyes lit up in realization (though of what, he had yet to figure out), "Oh. So...he doesn't have a mom?"

"Nope," Dean agreed hurriedly, not entirely sure what she was implying but deciding to just roll with it, "No mom in the picture." He opened his mouth to lay on some of his winning charm that had gotten him lucky in the past, but Sam interrupted him by flinging himself out of his arms. Panic gripped Dean's heart and he was about to chase after him before he turned and realized who Sam was running to.

"Up!" Sam commanded, grinning widely as Cas hesitantly obeyed him. Cas shot Dean a bemused look and glanced down to the bag in his hand, "I have acquired the diapers as you requested."

Dean smiled weakly, "Thanks, Cas." He turned back to the woman and saw her eyes flicker between the two men.

"That's what I thought," The woman said with a relieved sigh, glancing at Dean as she continued with a faint blush decoratig her sharp cheekbones, "I hate to ask you this, but my partner and I have been trying for almost a year to adopt. How did you two accomplish it?" Dean's hopes of sex dissipated as a horrific realization washed over him.

"You think him and I," He motioned between himself and Cas, who had gradually migrated over to stand beside the hunter, "Are—"

"It came as a surprise," Castiel answered her, not noticing the glare he received from Dean, "Especially to me. I had dropped by at his insistence and found him with a child. It was...quite baffling."

"Oh, that's so sweet," The woman gushed, glancing back at a speechless Dean, "You are such a good husband. And apparently an even better father," Her eyes drifted to Sam's shirt, "AC/DC is Karen's favorite band, too. God, she'd totally flip if she was here."

Dean cleared his throat and smiled awkwardly, searching for the quickest way to get out of this nightmare as soon as possible, "Yeah, well...we better get home to feed the little tike." He glanced at Cas and added sourly, "Come on, Honey." A single eyebrow lifted upward at the name, but the angel dutifully followed him with no questions.

"That was an interesting trip." Cas commented as Dean struggled to Sam get situated in the new car seat they'd just bought.

"Why did you imply to that lady that we were butt-buddies?" Dean demanded, spinning around to glare venomously at him, "Like seriously, what the fuck?"

Castiel blinked, "I did no such thing." He tilted his head as he casted a glance back at the mall, "I had no idea that was what she was thinking. I only answered her question truthfully."

Dean rolled his eyes exasperatedly but couldn't find it in him to be all that upset (after all, the girl did turn out to be gay, so no loss, no gain, as they say), "Whatever." He took the bag from Castiel's hand and rummaged through it, grimacing at its contents, "Cas, did you seriously buy him Disney Princess diapers?"

Cas shrugged, "You didn't specify."

Dean pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, announcing flatly, "Sometimes, I have to wonder if you screw with me on purpose."

Later that evening, Dean discovered that Sam wasn't just a bitch; he was a traitorous bitch.

The little toddler practically clung to the angel all evening; hell, he barely even paid attention to Dean, even though he was the one that fed him, bathed him, and wrestled him into his new Transformer pajamas. And Dean had to admit, he was feeling a little jealous at the attention Sammy was giving Cas, as if he was the most supreme being in the universe (which hey, Cas was pretty cool and all, but Dean was cooler, you know?). The only hilarious part of the situation was how utterly lost Cas looked, staring at Sam with puzzled blue eyes as the toddler happily babbled on in gibberish baby-talk and played with the buttons on his trench coat.

"Okay, Sammy," Dean sighed out, standing up and lifting a drowsy Sam from Castiel's lap, "Bedtime, Champ."

As he situated Sam on the bed, the toddler cracked an eye open and blindly reach up and touched his rough, stubbly cheek, "Night, Dee."

Dean couldn't help but smile at him as he gently ruffled Sam's hair, saying softly, "Night, Kiddo."

Sam yawned and shifted his gaze to Cas, who sat in the recliner rigidly as he watched them, "Night, Cas."

If Dean didn't know any better, he would've sworn he saw a glint of tenderness flicker across those usually indifferent blue eyes before they returned to their regular stoniness, "Pleasant dreams, Sam." Apparently satisfied with both their replies, Sam buried his tiny body further into the mountain of blankets and fell fast asleep in a matter of seconds.

With a sigh, Dean sauntered over and flopped down onto the sofa, pouring himself a well-needed glass of whiskey, "Kids wipe you out faster than any monster, eh?" Cas remained silent as he slipped out of the reclining chair and sat down next to Dean with an unreadable gleam dancing in his blue eyes.

"You want some?" Dean asked, motioning to his glass.

Cas shook his head, staring intensely at the television despite obviously not paying attention to what was happening on the screen. Dean wanted to ask what was up with the cold shoulder treatment, but he always backed just as the question was about to tumble from his lips.

"Did you honestly feel that horrified when the woman thought we were together?" Castiel asked eventually, breaking the silence.

And how the fuck was he supposed to even respond to something like that? 'Well, to be honest, it's not like I haven't thought about it before, but it does freak me out a little when it's implied somewhere other than my subconscious'? ...Yeah, speaking the complete truth was out of the question. After all, that would only make this whole conversation even more awkward than it was now (if that was even possible considering the amount of blood that was flooding to Dean's cheeks).

"Horrified is a strong word." Dean eventually muttered in response, draining the rest of his drink as if that would help drown the pesky feelings that kept stubbornly bubbling to the surface every time he saw the angel.

"Then what is a more appropriate term?" Cas pressed, his gaze locked ahead though Dean knew the angel was watching him intently from the corner of his eye.

Dean sighed, raking a hand through his hair, "Dammit, Cas…you know I'm not good with words. High school dropout, remember?"

Cas stayed silent for a long moment—so long that Dean thought the angel dropped the dangerous conversation altogether. But just as Dean allowed himself to relax (and fight off the odd sense of disappointment that settled in his gut at his silence), Cas declared quietly, "Then why don't you use something other than words to express your feelings?"

It took Dean half a second to realize what he meant. But when the meaning of his words sunk in, Dean's breath caught in his throat. He stared Cas with wide eyes, but the angel refused to remove his gaze from the television. Well, this is it, Dean thought, his heart beating so loud it was a wonder that he could even hear his own thoughts, put up or shut up. Before he could mentally talk himself out of it, Dean caught Castiel's chin and forcibly turned his head so he would finally look at him. The hunter's gaze lingered on Castiel's deep blue eyes before it dropped to his chapped lips. He watched with intense interest—intense desire as those chapped lips formed his name, "Dean..." Dean didn't let Cas continue as he leaned in and captured the angel's lips with his own.

Meanwhile, little Sammy hid himself in the covers and tried not to giggle in victory.

Author's Note: I'm sorry this was so terrible. Next chapter will have Charlie and Kevin in it, so I hope that'll make up for this monstrosity.

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