My shoes are old. I've dragged my feet in them so much the soles are half worn off and the laces are frayed every which way. My backpack's basically rags barely holding up my 20 pounds of books and binder. I keep my head down and carry myself along the sidewalk. My eyelids feel as though 50 pound weights are dragging them down my face, my shoulders have an immense weight as though I am experiencing a constant five Gs. As I schlepp my weight across the dirt lawn I scramble to get my key out of my pocket. The keyhole has been worn down a lot, like it hasn't been replaced since the duplex was built.

I just don't even want to see my brother or my dad, those religious freaks. I just about bolt up the stairs, running on adrenaline. My legs would feel like gelatin if they weren't already numb. I lay on my bed and sigh, closing my eyes hoping to get a little shut eye. Such sleep eludes me, like usual. I guess I should study, but I doubt it would even stick in my mind for the most fleeting of moments.

A knock sounds at my door.

"Hey, Karkat. I heard you come in the door, so don't act like you're not home," a somewhat gruff voice comes from the other side of the door. All I have the energy to do is grumble. "Is it okay if I come in?"

"I don't think I can stop you, so yeah, whatever the fuck you want," I sigh. I'm in no mood for this. Of course, when am I ever.

"Language, young crab," he opens the door, coming in and sitting on the edge of my bed. I don't look up, just let my head sink deeper into the blood and drool stained, flat pillow.

"You haven't called me that since I was in elementary school."

"I still think it fits the description," he chuckles.

"Whatever, what do you want?" I question, wanting this to be cut as short as possible.

"I was hoping you'd come to church with Kankri and I tonight. Since we're starting a Wednesday night service I was hoping you would come. If you don't want to stay for the service, there's youth group you can participate in," he informs me. I can already see the intense disappointment on his face if I were to say no. I hate that face. It makes me feel so bad, and I hate that feeling of sub-parness. I'm not sure if he knows what power he has over the emotions of others.

"Fine, I'll try it. But no promises, dad," I make sure to add a bit of tartness to my voice as I turn and sit up, sounding more venomous than I actually mean to, but I think it does the trick. He lets out a deep sigh and stands, turning as if to say something else. His shoulders slump slightly, his face looking so tired. He then faces the door and exits, closing it behind him.

I don't know how he does it. Honestly, I don't. He works full time and sometimes overtime at the metalwork shop. He's worked long enough to get day shift. When I was younger I went with him for take your child to work day. He was trying not to let me know how hard he was working. On top of his long hours he's one of the pastors at our church. Also having to raise us, I have no clue what time he uses to come up with sermons.

I just end up lounging around in my room for a while. Maybe somewhere I might have slept, but if so it was short lived. I have an old computer in my room, it has to have an adapter for the Wi-Fi. I generally just spend my time on random websites or some such. Kanaya convinced me to download this stupid chat client called pesterchum. It's fine, I guess. I rather text, though. I did start talking to this one pers-

"Karkat! Come downstairs, dinner is ready and we'll be heading to church soon," I hear my older brother shout from downstairs. I shut down the computer and head downstairs.

"What's gonna kill me tonight?" I question, looking at Kankri once I'm at the bottom of the stairs. His cooking actually isn't that bad, I just like to tease him about it.

He gives me a long glare before responding, "How do you know that one of these days it isn't going to kill you. It wouldn't be all that funny. You know, comments like that can cause emotional pain in some people, luckily not such as myself. You should really watch what you say, as it could harm potential or already formed friendships and romantic entanglements. I suggest that you work on what you say, and try to be more positive than negative, as you have been for a while now- Hey! Do not make such rude and obscene gestures at me while I am trying to give you a life lesson. Now do you actually want food or not?"

"What the hell is it?" I interrogate, shrugging off his look of disappointment at my choice of vocabulary.

"If you must know, fish sticks and tater tots from the oven. I would have made something better but we need to leave in ten minutes, so eat or starve, I suggest the former."

"Whatever, you dishing up?"

"I already have my plate ready. Get your own, brat," he glances at me before walking towards the table.

"I thought you were against such insulting language, Mr. High Pantas," I reply back.

"Well I know you can take such light terminology, and you're my brother. As such I am supposed to insult you to some degree," Kankri counters, using a fork to eat the tater tots like an idiot.

"How did you like Youth Group?" My dad asks, sitting in the passenger seat whilst Kankri drives.

I don't respond.

"How was the lesson?" he tries again.

"I didn't get it," I lie. I simply just didn't pay attention. I think it was something about accepting Christ and blah blah blah.

"Would you like me to explain it?" he questions, looking back.

"Umm, maybe later," I reply quickly, trying to cover up the fact that I didn't care. As we pull in the driveway I'm the first one out. Pulling out my house keys, I unlock the door and close it behind me, skipping steps upstairs. I log onto my computer and see that someone sent me a message via that shitty chat system.

-arsenicCatnip [AC] began pestering carcinoGenetecist [CG] at 19:06 -

AC :33 hey i saw a cool thing at the mall today!

AC :33 befurr you ask i was there with my friend

AC :33 uummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

AC :33 are you there

-arsenicCatnip [AC] is now an idle chum! -

-arsenicCatnip [AC] ceased pestering carcinoGenetecist [CG] at 19:53 -

Well shit, I better respond.

-carcinoGenetecist [CG] began pestering arsenicCatnip [AC] at 20:47 -

CG: FUCK, SORRY. MY DAD DRAGGED ME TO CHURCH TONIGHT. I DIDN'T MEAN TO MISS YOUR MESSAGES.

CG: NOW WHAT THE OBLITTERATING FUCK DO YOU WANT, AC?

AC :33 i just wanted to say hi as usual mr grumbly fart

AC :33 but appurrently you will have none of it so i might as well leave you alone

AC :33 so bye!

CG: HOLY SHIT, WAIT. I DIDN'T MEAN TO SOUND SO BITTERLY UNENTHUSIASTIC FOR YOUR ROYAL ARRIVAL, YOUR HIGHNESS.

CG: AND SERIOUSLY, MR. GRUMBLY FART? IS THAT YOUR WORST INSULT?

AC :33 no

AC :33 you poopy diaper wearing slobber baby

CG: |:B

AC :33 is that supawsed to be your hair?

CG: FUCK OFF.

AC :33 whatever

AC :33 you said that you were at church

CG: YEAH, WHY?

AC :33 only because we were supposed to go to church too

AC :33 but we didnt because my moms sick

CG: LUCKY.

AC :33 well unlike you i like church

AC :33 anyways id like to talk more but my sisters going to have a ball if she sees me talking to a guy after my bedtime

AC :33 or a girl

AC :33 or just anyone

AC :33 as you know she is no boundaries with her shipping

AC :33 so night!

CG: NIGHT.

-arsenicCatnip [AC] ceased pestering carcinoGenetecist [CG] at 21:03—

Well, I have no clue what I'm going to do now.