Renly's facial hair rubbed my chin raw, which I tried to ignore as he pulled me closer to him. His hands slipping all over my back and through my soaking wet hair from our dip in the lake. We had managed to dock the Jet Ski without our hands all over each other before Renly went right back to kissing me on the dock. I held his shoulders, still overwhelmed and gasped as his teeth tugged at my lower lip. He was better at this then I had expected, it made me feel a little oozy to think he had been using the same moves on my own sister.

I had never kissed a guy, so I felt rather unexperienced and awkward. I pushed at his shoulders pulling away from him but Renly tried to follow me. I placed a hand on his lips to stop him.

"We're in the middle of a dock in a very populated area, slow down," I whispered to him, his hands swinging low on my hips. Renly kissed my fingers and I pulled them away sharply. He grinned lopsidedly and my breath caught in my throat.

"I don't care," He muttered, leaning forward again to kiss at my jaw line, sucking the skin in between his teeth. I collapsed back against his chest at the feeling, looping my arms around his neck and threading my fingers into his hair. It was soft and I could smell his shampoo as he pressed closer to my neck. "I wouldn't care if the whole fucking soccer team saw us right now," He whispered into my skin and I could practically hear the desire in his throat. My stomach pooled with heat at his words. We were moving too fast for what I was comfortable for.

As if on cue his hands slipped down onto my butt. I gasped and swatted him away, taking steps away and wiping at my mouth.

"Renly, seriously, slow down," I held up a hand to stop him and he seemed to get the idea through his thick skull eventually. I pushed my hair around to make it look nicer, admiring the moonlight on the lake. Renly watched me, concern flittering through his expression.

"Is, um, something wrong?" He asked, painfully awkward. Renly was horrible with emotional people. I moved to sit down on the end of the dock, dangling my feet off the edge. My sneakers still dripped from the water, along with the rest of my clothing.

"No, no, nothing wrong believe me," I said as Renly took a seat beside me, staring at the deadly calm water beneath us and not at me. "It's just a lot to take in," I sighed. In the span of one day everything was different. Renly wasn't my best friend any more, he was something different. But maybe deep down I still wanted him to be my best friend. Then again, I had always heard that the best relationships are based off of friendship. That stirred something in the pit of my stomach. Maybe Renly and I where perfect for each other because we were best friends first.

"Yeah, that's okay, sorry," Renly murmured, looking over at me.

I met his gaze and slowly I smiled at him. Renly returned it, scooting closer to me and wrapping and arm around my shoulders. He had done that countless times before, but it felt so different now. I sighed and wrapped an arm around his side and we sat in silence for a moment before I couldn't help but dig my fingers into his side. Renly had always been more ticklish there. He squawked and batted me off, scrambling to his feet and prancing away from me, rubbing at his side. I laughed a soft quiet laugh.

"You ruined the moment!" He accused me.

"We were having a moment?" I questioned. Renly shrugged. "It's okay I think we can fix it," I took the liberty I now had to place a kiss on his lips, holding his hips in my hands. I pulled back before Renly could try and deepen it. I didn't want to be so out in the open doing that on some dock. I brushed past him and started back up the path, aware of Renly's eyes on my back. When we got back Renly was back upon me and I accepted him a bit more happily now that we were away from possible prying eyes. Kissing Renly was good, kissing Renly wasn't moving too fast.

He pushed the door closed behind him, pulling me back to his body. As he placed kisses to my lips I paced backwards, leading him along. Renly grinned at me as I fell onto the couch and he followed like he had been, sitting down next to me. At first he kissed me desperately, full of sharp jarring movements and quiet moans but eventually I managed to gain control, slowing him down. I held his cheek in my hand and kissed him softly and fully, each kiss taking longer than the one before it. Eventually I had Renly completely captivated by the kiss and my own heart thundered in my chest.

I was glad I had compression shorts on.

I swore then room had heated up and I was completely in love with how our lips worked together. His hand slipped to the small of my back, rubbing gentle circles with each kiss. I tugged him closer to me. I could feel Renly's grin against my mouth and he pulled me onto his lap. The gasp fell from my mouth before I could stop it at the feeling on being seated on him. Renly was pushing at the kiss again, trying to turn it back into the sharp jarring kiss that we had before.

I turned my face away from him, gasping for air, and slid off his lap to stand up. Renly watched me, looking lonely in his seat on the coach now. His hair sticking all up in different directions and lips red from the kisses. I swallowed, willing the ache in my stomach to go away. There was no need to go far with Renly tonight; kissing was all I was going to allow. But by the way Renly was looking at me. All hungry and lust like, I knew he wanted more.

My stomach flipped and the ache in my stomach screamed as I forced myself to turn away from him and start shuffling through my backpack. I could practically sense his disappointment even if I couldn't see him. I stood back up with my sweatpants and a clean tee-shirt in my hands before I managed to turn and look at him.

"I'm going to take a shower, you should change so you don't get a cold," I told him, not waiting for a response before I hurried to the bathroom, turning the shower to the hottest it could go. Once safe inside the bathroom I collapsed against the sink, staring at myself in the mirror like I had not five hours earlier when Renly had pulled the tick off of me.

Funny how in the span of five hours your life can turn completely upside down. I stripped down and stepped into the water, thankful for piping hot water because it turned my attention away from my thoughts for a few moments. This was everything I had ever wanted, laid out on a table in front of me. Renly happy and willing to be with me. But as I contemplated Renly and I being together complications came up all over the place.

Mainly, Margaery. I know she liked him at least a little bit, girls are like that. She must have thought he asked her to prom because he liked her, not because he was trying to distract himself from me. I let the water run over my hair and drip down the bridge of my nose. I felt so guilty about stealing Renly out from underneath Margaery's nose. It just didn't fit with my morals.

Eventually after what must have been at least a half an hour I shut the water off, not wanting to use all of the hot water if Renly wanted to shower to. I cursed myself for realizing that I had forgotten to pick up boxers for myself in my desperate scramble to get to the bathroom and away from Renly's eyes. I sighed, pulling my sweatpants on and slipping back out into the main room.

Renly was still on the couch where I left him, but he had changed into track pants and a tee shirt and was sprawled out, the TV droning on. His gaze turned lazily to me and I hurried to my backpack.

"Sorry, I just forgot boxers," I mumbled, crouching down and digging around in my bag. Renly sat up slowly and for the first time in my life I felt uncomfortable with someone staring into my bare back. It bothered me a bit, Renly had seen me without clothes on plenty of times in the locker room. Just never a half an hour after I had pointedly rejected his advances for more sexual acts.

"It's okay, you don't need them." Renly said and suddenly he was a lot closer behind me then I had previously thought when I had crouched down. He eyed me from a few feet away and I stared back, holding the plaid boxers close to my chest.

"Trust me, I want them," I said and Renly looked hurt for a moment before he shrugged and stuffed his hands into his pockets. I looked to the clock; it was almost two in the morning. "You can have gone to bed without me," I said as I disappeared back into the bathroom for a moment to slip the boxers on underneath my sweatpants and pull my tee-shirt over my head as I returned. Renly shut off the TV, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I thought you might want to just lie around, together, so I waited," Renly looked completely awkward, he was starting to understand that I had no intentions to go any farther then we had tonight. I forced a tight smile onto my face.

"Thanks," I forced out, pitifully strained. This was what I was scared about if I was to ever be with Renly. We would be completely out of our element with each other. What if he never made those stupid jokes he did ever again? Renly stepped closer to me, taking my hand in his. It was gentle, and much more on the level I wanted us to be on.

"I'll take the couch, you go upstairs," Renly said softly, pulling his hand back away from me and flopping back down onto the couch. I didn't argue, just took my leave up the stairs, feeling completely empty. As much as I wanted Renly, maybe we were just never meant to be. I contemplated that fact as I lay in the bed upstairs, the feather blanket far too hot for the summer. I kicked it off in my frustration, I couldn't sleep and Renly plagued on thoughts. Every time I closed my eyes I could feel his lips on mine, or that momentary squeeze of my butt he had done before. It was too hot. Too confusing.

Completely miserable about an hour after I had tried to sleep I sat up and swung out of the bed. I made my way down the stairs and the creaking of the stairs must have alerted Renly because I could see his dark form roll over in the darkness on the couch. I watched him groggily sit up. Clearly he had not been as plagued by thoughts as I was. I had always thought things through too much. I moved towards him as he yawned.

"Loras you okay?" He asked, his voice seeming far too loud in the darkness. I sat down beside him, lying back on the pillows he had had his head on before. They smelled like him. Renly watched me, carefully reaching out to touch my back. After a few moments of Renly rubbing at the junction between my neck and back I pulled him to me. As much as my thoughts plagued me, they seemed to leave when Renly was near me. I flashed back to what I had told myself yesterday morning when we had first arrived that morning.

Renly and I where all alone. No one would ever know, not Margaery or Sansa or Robb or anyone as long as we kept it between us. It could be out dirty little secret.

I turned to him, pulling him to his feet as I stood up. Renly furrowed his eyebrows at me, confused and looking a little worried.

"Come lay with me," I whispered to him, dropping his hand to start up the stairs, hoping he would follow me. Once I had collapsed back onto the bed I heard the steps creaking as Renly walked up them. Only a few moments later the mattress dipped beside me and Renly's breath ghosted across my neck. I turned over slowly, lifting my head so Renly could slip his arm underneath. He smiled gently at me in the dark, placing a kiss on my forehead.

"What are you thinking about?" He asked against my skin. I stayed silent, rubbing gently as Renly's shoulder, admiring the muscle underneath it.

"You," I whispered back to him, almost so quiet that it got lost in the blackness. Renly nuzzled closer to me, breathing in my air. I pressed my forehead against his.

"About my dashing good looks I presume," Renly said, the hint of sarcasm causing me to chuckle a little bit. That was the first joke I had heard him say since we had argued and then kissed. And it felt nice to just smile about what he said.

"No, not yet, sorry," I responded, my eyes falling closed.

"Darn. What about then?" He was so close we barely had to say any words for the other to hear us.

"All the problems this will cause," My voice caught in my throat and I felt Renly tense up beside me. For a moment I thought he was going to pull away from me so I grabbed onto the front of his tee-shirt, bunching up the fabric.

"I know. I've been thinking about that too," He said softly.

"You led my sister on,"

"I know,"

We fell back into silence, breathing each other's air in and out. Slowly I sealed the inch between us to kiss his lips. Renly returned it, just as gently, but it could have been just because he was tired.

"And as an older brother I find that rude," I smiled a little bit, "But we might be able to work around it," I added after a moment of silence. Renly heaved a huge sigh, kissing me again.

"For a second there I thought you were going to tell me to leave," He said, chuckling a little bit, clearly relived over my words. I didn't smile, opening my eyes to find Renly's green ones staring back.

"For a second I thought I was going to,"

I awoke in the morning to Renly's breath stirring the hair on my forehead. I jumped away from him, rubbing at my eyes as the events of late last night began rolling back to me. Renly didn't wake from my movements. He had always been a heavy sleeper. Slowly I swung my legs out of the bed, my bare feet landing soundlessly on the wood floor, and trudged downstairs. Fifteen minutes later my feet pounded against the tar of the road.

Running always cleared my mind, one thing I could really do with right now. I had woken up at around nine, leaving me with only about six hours of sleep last night. But as sleepy as I was, I needed to get away from the condo and Renly. He always fogged my mind up. While Renly fogged my mind, running cleared it. In the middle of town there wasn't much going on, I spotted a few juniors from my school milling around at a nearby breakfast place. And the locals where already up and moving, but other than that the town seemed pretty quiet.

I think the reason why I was making such rash decisions with Renly was because I knew I was in love with him. He was everything I had ever dreamed of, a soccer player, muscular, stunning smile. But everywhere I looked with him and I together there where complications. Margaery, the soccer team, my own family. Mainly that I was going to collage in a few months, Renly would stay back. Long distance relationships never work. But that was thinking too far ahead, who's to say we could even last a month in a relationship.

I wasn't sure I could deal with the look on Margaery's face when I told her that Renly and I were going out. It would break her heart. And as her own brother, I don't think I could do that.

I jogged down the road back to the condo, sweat beginning to form in the nape of my neck. I hadn't been gone for long, but I had took the run at a fast pace. The hill back to the condo made my calves ache, which I knew was going to happen because hills where always harder for me. I was much better at running tracks or flat ground. Hence why I played soccer and did sprinting.

In a way, that related back to my own life. I could trudge on endlessly on a flat ground, with no bumps or rolls. But the seconds I was forced up a hill I would slow down, breath heavier, work harder. Renly was more like a mountain then a hill for me. And just as I thought I was getting to the top of it I would realize that it was only a flattening of the ground before another steep climb.

This mountain climb that was Renly and I's relationship was far from over.

When I returned to the condo, wiping away sweat and willing the ache in my calves to leave Renly still had not woken up, but now that it ten o'clock I didn't bother being quiet to try and not wake up Renly. I switched the TV on to the news, which always comforted me. And fought with the coffee maker for a little bit before it finally sputtered and spat some coffee out. There wasn't any cream in the fridge so I had to use milk, which was rather unsatisfying.

I retired to the couch for a little bit, mindlessly watching the news and nursing my coffee mug. I entertained the idea of trying to make pancakes, which Renly had brought the stuff for just so we could make some but then decided it was a bad idea. Cooking was no something I was good at. Renly on the other hand was slightly skilled at cooking, which I guess was due to how much food he ate.

Finally I spotted Renly's sock clad feet begin down the stairs. He yawned when he hit the bottom, moving towards the kitchen to fumble for the coffee. He resembled more of a bear just out of hibernation when he woke up than the man I was in love with. Once he had whined about the lack of cream much like how I had and lumped sugar into the coffee he collapsed onto the couch next to me.

"Good morning," I said, my voice sounding weaker then I had intended it too. In the daylight kissing Renly seemed like such a farfetched thing. And it make my stomach flip with I leaned over to press a kiss to his cheek, savoring the feeling of skin underneath my lips. For a split second as I kissed his cheek I had a moment of terror. What if everything had been a dream? Renly put my fear to rest as he turned to catch my lips, soft and groggy. He tasted like coffee and sugar. Which I guess I must have also tasted like.

"'Morning," Renly slurred as he pulled away, his eyelids still heavy with sleep as he blinked at me. It always took Renly a little bit to wake up in the morning. "It's supposed to rain today," He added, motioning to the TV where the weatherman was pointing to the dark red and green clouds of rain on his radar. I glanced out the window to eye the grey clouds, hoping they might go away.

"Yeah, but that's okay," I muttered, setting my coffee cup down on a coaster on the end table. "I wanted to drive the boat and watch you waterski but I guess not today," I said, Renly nodded in agreement, watching the TV and yawning

"You went for a run already? Typical," Renly said, noticing my tee-shirt and athletic shorts and the dried sweat on the back of my neck.

"Yeah, just a quick one,"

"I could have gone with you,"

"You wouldn't have been able to keep up," I teased and Renly smiled a little bit at me. Hooking my shoulder with a soft punch.

"Rude. I probably could have kept up with you," He mumbled, clearly not taking offense, just giving me a hard time.

"I'm sure," I rolled my eyes. Renly shrugged and stood up, moving to the kitchen.

"How many?" He asked, holding up the pancake mix. I held up three fingers and he grinned at me. "Ah, you're actually going to eat like a normal teenage boy today I see," Renly joked and I watched him as he measured and poured and struggled with the gas stove. It had a tendency to not light when you turn the knob and flair up a moment later, which would catch you by surprise if you didn't know the stove did that. I just stayed away from it and let Renly do the cooking. I got up to chop strawberries up for him as he flipped a pancake, grinning at me as it half landed in the pan.

"You're going to drop them, stop trying to be a show off," I told him sternly, cutting off the stem of the strawberries and pushing them off the cutting bored. Renly pouted.

"Aw, c'mon, that was pretty cool. Things like that should impress you," Renly said, kicking out a foot and hitting my calf. "Or do I have to kick a few winning goals in soccer to impress the beautiful Loras Tyrell," He joked, grinning at me and watching me out of the corner of his eye. I blushed and looked at the strawberries.

"You don't need to impress me," I told him softly but I was pretty sure he didn't hear me. And if he did he didn't bother to answer me, just tended to his pancakes. Pretty soon we each had our own pancakes, strawberries and whipped cream with maple syrup and we didn't dare eat anything with maple syrup on the couch so we ate the table which seemed weird because we never did that.

Renly, to my surprise, brought up what I had been thinking about endlessly for the last ten hours.

"So, what are we going to do about this," He motioning between the two of us and I pushed a strawberry around on my plate, coating it with maple syrup before popping it into my mouth. I shrugged in response to his question.

"What do you think we should do?" I asked softly.

"I was asking you what you think we should do. Don't flip this question on me," He accused. I could feel his gaze on my face but I refused to meet it. I knew exactly what I wanted to do about us. I wanted to be with Renly, but I didn't want anyone to know. I wanted to avoid the responsibly of being in a relationship. But I knew how Renly worked. It was all or nothing for him and he would not love having to hide a relationship away. For a little bit we stayed in silence before I finally figured it would be better to say something then to let the silence stretch on.

"I like you," I started, letting my fork drop onto my plate and forcing myself to meet his gaze, "I just don't like the idea of everyone knowing that I like you," Renly chewed at the inside of his cheek and our feet brushed underneath the table.

"Why-"

"It just won't work!" I snapped quickly, "Margaery, the team, my parents, you know how it is," I said bitterly. Renly watched me silently, his eyes flitting between my gaze and everywhere else on my face.

"I know," He said softly. I took a deep breath.

"But I like you. A lot." I added standing and picking up my plate and moving to wash it at the sink. Renly watched me as I did his black hair curly like it always looked when he just got up. He hadn't shaved in a while, so the black hair was starting to show on his chin. He was everything I needed and everything I wanted. I wiped my hands dry on a kitchen cloth and Renly stood to meet me.

His hands slipped around my chest, fingers spread across my back. Heat rushed at his touch and he pressed his forehead closer to mine. Slowly a small lopsided smile spread across his cheeks.

"I like you a lot too,"